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(Nov. 20, 2021  4:12 AM)SpeedySuomi Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 20, 2021  3:55 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]Episode 13: Tremor at Beigoma Academy, Valkyrie Vs. Perseus!: https://www.wattpad.com/1156221635-beybl...episode-13



Now I need to know. Was this chapter better than the last one? Please give me your thoughts and I promise on Saturday, Sunday, and Wenseday I'll only work on Mystic Clash and I should get at least 2 or 3 Chapters done.

Same rating as last time, 7.8/10. But I must admit, I like the battles here too, Pierce didn't just show off his power right off the bat with the upgrade. However, the battles had a big problem too... Valt got curbstomped immediately on the next round, you should've at least given them a good, long battle. It's as if the battles are constrained by the 10-minute runtime of the real anime. You're writing a fanfic, so try and maximize the battles' runtime to give them great intensity even if they have two rounds. Other than that, the chapter was still good and Yuuki's intro was spot-on, he just gets straight to the point which I like.

Thanks for giving me an Honest Review. I'll Multi-Task and try getting Episode 13 out with Magma Ifrit and I'll make sure the battles are Perfect!
(Nov. 20, 2021  4:26 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 20, 2021  4:12 AM)SpeedySuomi Wrote: [ -> ]Same rating as last time, 7.8/10. But I must admit, I like the battles here too, Pierce didn't just show off his power right off the bat with the upgrade. However, the battles had a big problem too... Valt got curbstomped immediately on the next round, you should've at least given them a good, long battle. It's as if the battles are constrained by the 10-minute runtime of the real anime. You're writing a fanfic, so try and maximize the battles' runtime to give them great intensity even if they have two rounds. Other than that, the chapter was still good and Yuuki's intro was spot-on, he just gets straight to the point which I like.

Thanks for giving me an Honest Review. I'll Multi-Task and try getting Episode 13 out with Magma Ifrit and I'll make sure the battles are Perfect!

Don't push yourself too much, you don't need to make it perfect, just extend them a bit. You might experience writer's block if you try to make them too perfect, I'm talking from experience (sorta).
(Nov. 20, 2021  3:55 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]Episode 13: Tremor at Beigoma Academy, Valkyrie Vs. Perseus!: https://www.wattpad.com/1156221635-beybl...episode-13



Now I need to know. Was this chapter better than the last one? Please give me your thoughts and I promise on Saturday, Sunday, and Wenseday I'll only work on Mystic Clash and I should get at least 2 or 3 Chapters done.

this episode was pretty poggers, and i have no doubt in my mind that it was m u c h better than last chapter! introduces a new character yuuki and gives valt a whole new losing streak! basically bell battles valt, wins, but before that pierce was in the sort of room where the vr headset thing-a-ma-bobber was. he choose bell as his partner which if im gonna be totally honest kinda made my heart feel warm that pierce considers bell a friend-rival figure rather than a baka king (lol)! anyways then valt's teamed with rashad and the battle commences! valt uses bound savior and yeets perseus into the stratosphere, perseus comes back down, leans on the a gear, then accelerates! he goes for a mystical shoot while varuto uses rush shoot to intercept it! then as they're doing that bell uses dynamite bomber on rashad's savior valkyrie, who uses savior slash! they both get sent towards the wall, with belial bursting and valkyrie R ricocheting off the wall towards perseus. pierce goes "grrr bell why are you such a baka king" and then uses bold riptide while the two valkyries release a devastating attack on them! all of them burst, which is actually insanely surprising seeing rashad and valt's current power level... anywho (idk how much ima use the prefix any-), the machine steams and explodes like my brain cells during a math test, so pierce runs off (wise man). then the aftermath of the battle is shown and bell wins! pierce wants to battle him so he does and it starts! so basically valt just uses shot upper and literally bodies pierce. then second battle commences and now pierce is more stronk! they start the battle trading blows with valkyrie with mystical shoot and rush shoot! then valkyrie goes for true savior slash, but pierce aims for the rubber and goes for bold riptide! he bursts valkyrie and yeah its pretty good!


so all in all this chapter was pretty good, and i think pierce kinda deserved the win against valt? im hype for next chapter and please keep up the good work!
I had to edit The Team Battles for the Story. It's Rashad Goodman, Ilya Mao, and Ranzo Kiyama Vs. Bell Daikokuten, Pierce Atsushi, and Yuuki Katagiri
(Nov. 20, 2021  5:56 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]I had to edit The Team Battles for the Story. It's Rashad Goodman, Ilya Mao, and Ranzo Kiyama Vs. Bell Daikokuten, Pierce Atsushi, and Yuuki Katagiri

Oh yeah, I also wanted to add something to Yuuki. If he thinks someone is ruining his fun, he will not hesitate to get rid of them, whether they be an enemy or an ally. And if he thinks they're interesting, he'll be willing to cooperate.

He is also secretive about his Bey, but for the most part it's because he doesn't like explaining how it works and he's not much of a big fan of showing off.
(Nov. 20, 2021  5:56 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]I had to edit The Team Battles for the Story. It's Rashad Goodman, Ilya Mao, and Ranzo Kiyama Vs. Bell Daikokuten, Pierce Atsushi, and Yuuki Katagiri

lol i was wondering why there were two team captains on rashad's team but no team captains on bell's team
Episode 14: The Flamming Salsa, Magma Ifrit!: https://www.wattpad.com/1156436504-beybl...ode-14-the

 

Yes I know you want the next Chapter of Mystic Clash I'm working on it trust me it'll either but out in 30 Minutes or Tomorrow Morning. Now I tried making the battles longer and a bit better so hopefully yall enjoy!

Chapter 10 of Mystic Clash is finally out! (This episode is very much filler but has Important Info)

Also I need an Avatar for Vagabond Yamato
(Nov. 20, 2021  3:26 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 19, 2021  8:55 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]I lost


Sad

Y i lost
im sad please symphatize

Why man im sad

Y DUDE ANSWER ME

(Nov. 20, 2021  3:26 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 19, 2021  8:55 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]I lost


Sad

Y i lost
im sad please symphatize

Why man im sad
11) The Dragon of Absorption, Shadow Fafnir!

12) Full Powered Battle, Free Vs. Victor!

13) The Supreme Halo, Supreme Raphael!

14) The Wise Sage, Sage Athena!

15) Let the Team Battle Commence!

16) Going all out, Tag Battle!

17) Total War, Battle Royal!

18) Tie Breaker, The Final Match!

19) The Battleship Cruise Rides Again!

and , I'd like to add your Characters in this Fanfiction from the Mystical Boldness Character Contest since you both did so well and it was very close. Would you two be okay with this?

(Nov. 21, 2021  1:01 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 20, 2021  3:26 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]Why man im sad

Y DUDE ANSWER ME

(Nov. 20, 2021  3:26 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]Why man im sad

Please don't do this. A part of entering in Fanfiction Contests are accepting when you lost and taking that loss as a chance to do better next time. But please don't just say I'm said and yell at people to answer you. I do feel bad but I chose SpeedySuomi because I really liked his entry. I'm not saying I didn't like yours I'm just saying that I just really liked his. Note it was very hard to choose a winner all of you did Amazing.
Sorry im having a bad temper this week

Also Thanks
Sure them at works
(Nov. 20, 2021  7:48 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]Episode 14: The Flamming Salsa, Magma Ifrit!: https://www.wattpad.com/1156436504-beybl...ode-14-the

 

Yes I know you want the next Chapter of Mystic Clash I'm working on it trust me it'll either but out in 30 Minutes or Tomorrow Morning. Now I tried making the battles longer and a bit better so hopefully yall enjoy!

Chapter 10 of Mystic Clash is finally out! (This episode is very much filler but has Important Info)

Also I need an Avatar for Vagabond Yamato

I didn't want to do this, but here it is anyway:
Anyways, for the review; the interactions are unchanged, but the action sequences have improved, very good. You used the same strategy as the one Ilya did with Lui, but it's in character for her, so I'll let it slide. Pierce gradually getting more pissed off was also a good addition, a character flaw Pierce needs to resolve. I enjoyed the battle choreography, and overall this is a significant improvement over the last chapters so it's an 8.4/10.

Hold on, the embed's not working so I'll just post the raw pic:
You can go edit it if you like, it's just Shogun from SF2 but with green outlines and teal flames surrounding him.
(Nov. 21, 2021  1:12 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]11) The Dragon of Absorption, Shadow Fafnir!

12) Full Powered Battle, Free Vs. Victor!

13) The Supreme Halo, Supreme Raphael!

14) The Wise Sage, Sage Athena!

15) Let the Team Battle Commence!

16) Going all out, Tag Battle!

17) Total War, Battle Royal!

18) Tie Breaker, The Final Match!

19) The Battleship Cruise Rides Again!

"8dnimwolloH" and "LA-Blader", I'd like to add your Characters in this Fanfiction from the Mystical Boldness Character Contest since you both did so well and it was very close. Would you two be okay with this?

(Nov. 21, 2021  1:01 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]Y DUDE ANSWER ME


Please don't do this. A part of entering in Fanfiction Contests are accepting when you lost and taking that loss as a chance to do better next time. But please don't just say I'm said and yell at people to answer you. I do feel bad but I chose SpeedySuomi because I really liked his entry. I'm not saying I didn't like yours I'm just saying that I just really liked his. Note it was very hard to choose a winner all of you did Amazing.

Sure, feel free to use it.
(Unrelated sidenote: I didn't said it before, but 2nd place is my curse lol)
oh really that is really interesting
In Celebration of getting 211 Reads on Mystical Boldness I'm going to do 10 Facts about Pierce Atsushi you may not have known

1. The Bey Pierce formally used was a Bey he got for his 12th Birthday from his Older Brother. When Belial broke it to keep memories he used the Fragments of his Former Bey to create Bold Perseus.

2. Pierce is 5'3

3. Pierce has a Special Bond with Perseus that is very tight. But this also came with a Drawback, he became Autophobic (Fear without a Specific Person) this will be reflected more on when Perseus gets in uh... A Pickle.

4. Pierce's OverDrive Bey's name will be Heroic Perseus.

5. Pierce never actually met his Parents. The only memory he has of them is when he was born and it is very fuzzy. But he's currently living with his Older Siblings Lilly and Leo. (They're Twins and they are both 19)

6. As of Episode 14 Pierce despises Ilya and is striving to beat her so he can wipe the smug face of her's clean.

7. Pierce basically dresses like Link from Breath of the Wild in the first clothes he wore in the Game except for the Color Scheme being Blue and Gold. He also wears a Vest and his Haircut is basically a Hikaru and Bell combination, he has a Mohawk on one side and in the middle of his hair, he has Porcupine hair going up like Hikaru but not as tall.

8. Pierce's Shoot is basically Bell's OverDrive shoot but instead of the Jump up he Jumps Forward

9. Bell and Pierce both hate to admit it but they actually are pretty Much Best Freinds but they don't act like it.

10. Pierce created his Bey, Perseus based on Perseus from Percy Jackson and the Olympians and the old Greek Stories about Perseus. That's why he refers to himself as the Olympian Hero
(Nov. 21, 2021  6:07 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]In Celebration of getting 211 Reads on Mystical Boldness I'm going to do 10 Facts about Pierce Atsushi you may not have known

1. The Bey Pierce formally used was a Bey he got for his 12th Birthday from his Older Brother. When Belial broke it to keep memories he used the Fragments of his Former Bey to create Bold Perseus.

2. Pierce is 5'3

3. Pierce has a Special Bond with Perseus that is very tight. But this also came with a Drawback, he became Autophobic (Fear without a Specific Person) this will be reflected more on when Perseus gets in uh...  A Pickle.

4. Pierce's OverDrive Bey's name will be Heroic Perseus.

5. Pierce never actually met his Parents. The only memory he has of them is when he was born and it is very fuzzy. But he's currently living with his Older Siblings Lilly and Leo. (They're Twins and they are both 19)

6. As of Episode 14 Pierce despises Ilya and is striving to beat her so he can wipe the smug face of her's clean.

7. Pierce basically dresses like Link from Breath of the Wild in the first clothes he wore in the Game except for the Color Scheme being Blue and Gold. He also wears a Vest and his Haircut is basically a Hikaru and Bell combination, he has a Mohawk on one side and in the middle of his hair, he has Porcupine hair going up like Hikaru but not as tall.

8. Pierce's Shoot is basically Bell's OverDrive shoot but instead of the Jump up he Jumps Forward

9. Bell and Pierce both hate to admit it but they actually are pretty Much Best Freinds but they don't act like it.

10. Pierce created his Bey, Perseus based on Perseus from Percy Jackson and the Olympians and the old Greek Stories about Perseus. That's why he refers to himself as the Olympian Hero
.
I feel like the 10th fact is more a UnseenBurst fact than a Pierce fact. (Btw, Medusa-owner rival when)
(Nov. 21, 2021  7:14 PM)Hollowmind8 Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 21, 2021  6:07 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]In Celebration of getting 211 Reads on Mystical Boldness I'm going to do 10 Facts about Pierce Atsushi you may not have known

1. The Bey Pierce formally used was a Bey he got for his 12th Birthday from his Older Brother. When Belial broke it to keep memories he used the Fragments of his Former Bey to create Bold Perseus.

2. Pierce is 5'3

3. Pierce has a Special Bond with Perseus that is very tight. But this also came with a Drawback, he became Autophobic (Fear without a Specific Person) this will be reflected more on when Perseus gets in uh...  A Pickle.

4. Pierce's OverDrive Bey's name will be Heroic Perseus.

5. Pierce never actually met his Parents. The only memory he has of them is when he was born and it is very fuzzy. But he's currently living with his Older Siblings Lilly and Leo. (They're Twins and they are both 19)

6. As of Episode 14 Pierce despises Ilya and is striving to beat her so he can wipe the smug face of her's clean.

7. Pierce basically dresses like Link from Breath of the Wild in the first clothes he wore in the Game except for the Color Scheme being Blue and Gold. He also wears a Vest and his Haircut is basically a Hikaru and Bell combination, he has a Mohawk on one side and in the middle of his hair, he has Porcupine hair going up like Hikaru but not as tall.

8. Pierce's Shoot is basically Bell's OverDrive shoot but instead of the Jump up he Jumps Forward

9. Bell and Pierce both hate to admit it but they actually are pretty Much Best Freinds but they don't act like it.

10. Pierce created his Bey, Perseus based on Perseus from Percy Jackson and the Olympians and the old Greek Stories about Perseus. That's why he refers to himself as the Olympian Hero
.
I feel like the 10th fact is more a UnseenBurst fact than a Pierce fact. (Btw, Medusa-owner rival when)

Brace yourself everyone because I'm going to blow all your socks off and you have Hollowmind to thank for me revealing this. *Sighs Sharply* Mystical Boldness is getting Two Seasons. This will be my first Fanfiction that has more than one Season and might get a Third for the Last Season of Beyblade. Though the Second Season will Not follow the events of DB. It'll be my own type of thing and we'll probably get a Medusa Owner in S2
(Nov. 21, 2021  7:31 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 21, 2021  7:14 PM)Hollowmind8 Wrote: [ -> ].
I feel like the 10th fact is more a UnseenBurst fact than a Pierce fact. (Btw, Medusa-owner rival when)

Brace yourself everyone because I'm going to blow all your socks off and you have Hollowmind to thank for me revealing this. *Sighs Sharply* Mystical Boldness is getting Two Seasons. This will be my first Fanfiction that has more than one Season and might get a Third for the Last Season of Beyblade. Though the Second Season will Not follow the events of DB. It'll be my own type of thing and we'll probably get a Medusa Owner in S2
NOW THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT

WOOP WOOP, TWO SEASONS OF MYSTICAL BOLDNESS, LETS GOOOO
This is Pierce's Face. Just don't mind the hair since I already told you what it's supposed to look like and of course, Picrew doesn't have it.
[Image: 1171011_fQnaq80i.png]
(Nov. 21, 2021  7:31 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 21, 2021  7:14 PM)Hollowmind8 Wrote: [ -> ].
I feel like the 10th fact is more a UnseenBurst fact than a Pierce fact. (Btw, Medusa-owner rival when)

Brace yourself everyone because I'm going to blow all your socks off and you have Hollowmind to thank for me revealing this. *Sighs Sharply* Mystical Boldness is getting Two Seasons. This will be my first Fanfiction that has more than one Season and might get a Third for the Last Season of Beyblade. Though the Second Season will Not follow the events of DB. It'll be my own type of thing and we'll probably get a Medusa Owner in S2
.
No prob lol.
 I just said that because I watched a fast animated recap on Perceus story recently and I've made a Medusa bey before, for a contest in Densetzu (MasterOfDerp fic). Also, Medusa is kinda one of the main things on Perseus story so...
(Nov. 21, 2021  1:12 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]11) The Dragon of Absorption, Shadow Fafnir!

12) Full Powered Battle, Free Vs. Victor!

13) The Supreme Halo, Supreme Raphael!

14) The Wise Sage, Sage Athena!

15) Let the Team Battle Commence!

16) Going all out, Tag Battle!

17) Total War, Battle Royal!

18) Tie Breaker, The Final Match!

19) The Battleship Cruise Rides Again!

and , I'd like to add your Characters in this Fanfiction from the Mystical Boldness Character Contest since you both did so well and it was very close. Would you two be okay with this?

(Nov. 21, 2021  1:01 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]Y DUDE ANSWER ME


Please don't do this. A part of entering in Fanfiction Contests are accepting when you lost and taking that loss as a chance to do better next time. But please don't just say I'm said and yell at people to answer you. I do feel bad but I chose SpeedySuomi because I really liked his entry. I'm not saying I didn't like yours I'm just saying that I just really liked his. Note it was very hard to choose a winner all of you did Amazing.

Can u Forgive me
(Nov. 22, 2021  12:30 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 21, 2021  1:12 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]11) The Dragon of Absorption, Shadow Fafnir!

12) Full Powered Battle, Free Vs. Victor!

13) The Supreme Halo, Supreme Raphael!

14) The Wise Sage, Sage Athena!

15) Let the Team Battle Commence!

16) Going all out, Tag Battle!

17) Total War, Battle Royal!

18) Tie Breaker, The Final Match!

19) The Battleship Cruise Rides Again!

and , I'd like to add your Characters in this Fanfiction from the Mystical Boldness Character Contest since you both did so well and it was very close. Would you two be okay with this?


Please don't do this. A part of entering in Fanfiction Contests are accepting when you lost and taking that loss as a chance to do better next time. But please don't just say I'm said and yell at people to answer you. I do feel bad but I chose SpeedySuomi because I really liked his entry. I'm not saying I didn't like yours I'm just saying that I just really liked his. Note it was very hard to choose a winner all of you did Amazing.

Can u Forgive me

I was never mad at you in the first place. I was just saying but of course

Episode 15: The Unseen Shogun, Vagabond Yamato!: https://www.wattpad.com/1157070942-beybl...ode-15-the



I actually really enjoy writing Yuuki his character is very well written by SpeedSuomi (Hi) and he's just really fun to write in battles and just in General, especially with his personality. Hope yall enjoy this chapter I worked all day on this and honestly didn't think I was going to finish in time and I'd have to postpone it. Luckily I pulled through in the end. Don't worry the next Mystic Clash Chapter is coming this Wednesday.
(Nov. 22, 2021  12:59 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]
(Nov. 22, 2021  12:30 AM)CelBeyBlade Wrote: [ -> ]Can u Forgive me

I was never mad at you in the first place. I was just saying but of course

Episode 15: The Unseen Shogun, Vagabond Yamato!: https://www.wattpad.com/1157070942-beybl...ode-15-the



I actually really enjoy writing Yuuki his character is very well written by SpeedSuomi (Hi) and he's just really fun to write in battles and just in General, especially with his personality. Hope yall enjoy this chapter I worked all day on this and honestly didn't think I was going to finish in time and I'd have to postpone it. Luckily I pulled through in the end. Don't worry the next Mystic Clash Chapter is coming this Wednesday.

Ooh boy, this was a good one. Overall it's a 7.9/10, and here's what I have to say; the battles were pretty good, and though the choreography wasn't as good as the last one with Ilya and Pierce, it was still okay. Initially, your portrayal of Yuuki was spot-on, but the serious mode' thing was slightly out of character since he doesn't break that easily. If he was pissed, he'd talk in a more serious tone and his aura would intensify, but he wouldn't go screaming unless he's real mad. Overall though, the portrayal was good enough for Yuuki. The interactions were alright enough but were somewhat shorter. But I suppose that'd be irrelevant considering how this was more focused on the battles, I'll let it slide.
Mystic Clash Episodes (Guess who the Main Antag is)

11) The Dragon of Absorption, Shadow Fafnir!

12) Full Powered Battle, Free Vs. Victor!

13) The Supreme Halo, Supreme Raphael!

14) The Wise Sage, Sage Athena!

15) Let the Team Battle Commence!

16) Going all out, Tag Battle!

17) Total War, Battle Royal!

18) Tie Breaker, The Final Match!

19) The Curropted Blading World, Blight Ganon! (Yes I'm a Zelda Fan)

20) The Battle Ship Cruise Rides Again!

21) The Greek God of Hearths, Scorch Hesita!

22) The Omega Dragon, Omega Dragoon!

12) The Flying Dynamite Battle Tour

13) Tremor at Beigoma Academy, Pierce Vs. Valt!

14) The Flaming Salsa, Magma Ifrit

15) The Unseen Shogun, Vagabond Yamato!

16) Crimson Clash, Pierce Vs. Rashad!

17) The Final Stretch, Team Relay!

18) The Hyper Crimson God, Astral Spriggan!

19) The Greek Olympian's Quest Against the Dragon!

20) Battle of the Crimson Beys, Spriggan Vs. Valkyrie!

21) The Ultra Double Tag Battles!

22) The Volcanic Eruption, Magma Smash!

23) The 8 Headed Dragon, Guilty Longinus!

24) The Flamming Hot Salsa Vs. The Raging Dragon's Strike!

25) Yamato's True Power, Fighting The Dragon of Toture

26) The Perfect Hero, Perfect Gear Perseus!

27) The Jumping Valkyrie Vs. The Metal Longinus!

28) Basara's Challenge, Facing Longinus!

29) Saving The Demon King!

30) The Strategic Sky Battle, The Supreme King Vs. The Olympian Hero!
Omega Dragooooooon!
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