The Legend of the beys: the lost blader- incomplete

(Apr. 04, 2011  11:32 PM)pikabattler Wrote: at the moment i lost witch characters are who's so i have no idea if yours is in or not.
Hope ur stil lrequestin characrers
Name Mager
Bey Thermal Wuju
Appearance Wheres a cloack that covers his face
Special moves World stand still
Worlds stay frozen and wuju slices the opponet bey
Wuju Destruction
Wuju split into 2 beys
Yin yang catapult
Beys jump into the air and goes mega fast that theey are invisible and yin does the first shot and then yang hits the opponet on a angle
(Apr. 05, 2011  2:37 AM)jcmanaf Wrote:
(Apr. 04, 2011  11:32 PM)pikabattler Wrote: at the moment i lost witch characters are who's so i have no idea if yours is in or not.
Hope ur stil lrequestin characrers
Name Mager
Bey Thermal Wuju
Appearance Wheres a cloack that covers his face
Special moves World stand still
Worlds stay frozen and wuju slices the opponet bey
Wuju Destruction
Wuju split into 2 beys
Yin yang catapult
Beys jump into the air and goes mega fast that theey are invisible and yin does the first shot and then yang hits the opponet on a angle
not to be mean, but it was kind of difficult which things were which with out the '':''..oh, and you character is super duper overpowered, but what does my opinion matter? I don't make the story xD--oh yeah, and read around the thread sometime man
(Apr. 05, 2011  2:20 AM)Soopah Wrote: you still know which characters are mine though..right?

yes, yours is easily tracked, i thing wraith posted his on this topic so i should be able to find his.

jcmanaf: good except the world stand still move, to powerful, though i might just find a place.
(Apr. 05, 2011  11:11 PM)pikabattler Wrote:
(Apr. 05, 2011  2:20 AM)Soopah Wrote: you still know which characters are mine though..right?

yes, yours is easily tracked, i thing wraith posted his on this topic so i should be able to find his.

jcmanaf: good except the world stand still move, to powerful, though i might just find a place.
YAY WHEN SHOULD I GET MY CHARACTER INTO UR STORY!?!
hey i would like to help. if maybe a girl comes in the story i would love to be her Eee
(Apr. 06, 2011  1:00 AM)DARK WOLF WBBA Wrote: hey i would like to help. if maybe a girl comes in the story i would love to be her Eee
you have to submit a character before he even considers it, and theres 1 girl already going in the story, and I submitted over 4, so your luck of your character getting in is pretty low, sorry ._.
you still remember mine correct?
i probably only lost characters sent by pm so if you posted it here then it's probably safe.
Make a crazy person like ryuga.
done already, got him in my head a while ago. can i just suspend this till i get my next chapter, too may characters coming in.
(Apr. 07, 2011  11:39 PM)pikabattler Wrote: done already, got him in my head a while ago. can i just suspend this till i get my next chapter, too may characters coming in.

it's your story, do what you want xD, oh and just to clarify things, you DID looka t the 4 characters I submitted last page right?
(Apr. 04, 2011  11:32 PM)pikabattler Wrote: at the moment i lost witch characters are who's so i have no idea if yours is in or not.

if your'e looking for a firey character, here's one, name: Red Crimson (not known yet) Bey: Shot Starblaze b140fi . Move: super explode(bey turns red and Red's hair goes up like super saiyan and turns red, enemy desintegrates). clothes: red jacket, red shirt, white pants, fire symbol. look: gray hair, fire tatoo, 3 spike forward hair ( fancy pants style)
(Apr. 08, 2011  2:04 AM)bbamsuv Wrote:
(Apr. 04, 2011  11:32 PM)pikabattler Wrote: at the moment i lost witch characters are who's so i have no idea if yours is in or not.

if your'e looking for a firey character, here's one, name: Red Crimson (not known yet) Bey: Shot Starblaze . Move: super explode(bey turns red and Red's hair goes up like super saiyan and turns red, enemy desintegrates). clothes: red jacket, red shirt, white pants, fire symbol. look: gray hair, fire tatoo, 3 spike forward hair ( fancy pants style)

...did you read the last few post..?
(Apr. 08, 2011  2:05 AM)Soopah Wrote:
(Apr. 08, 2011  2:04 AM)bbamsuv Wrote:
(Apr. 04, 2011  11:32 PM)pikabattler Wrote: at the moment i lost witch characters are who's so i have no idea if yours is in or not.

if your'e looking for a firey character, here's one, name: Red Crimson (not known yet) Bey: Shot Starblaze . Move: super explode(bey turns red and Red's hair goes up like super saiyan and turns red, enemy desintegrates). clothes: red jacket, red shirt, white pants, fire symbol. look: gray hair, fire tatoo, 3 spike forward hair ( fancy pants style)

...did you read the last few post..?

oops ... i fergot to read all of tem
I just wanna know, you working on this? Or just focusing on something else? xD it's completely fine..geez I sound like a pushover.
err focusing on ev training my pokemon for a tournament. ill work on it today, if possible. im sory for any inconvenience.
(Apr. 14, 2011  1:13 AM)pikabattler Wrote: err focusing on ev training my pokemon for a tournament. ill work on it today, if possible. im sory for any inconvenience.

hah, no inconvenience here, i'm still working on MY story as well even though no one reads it lol.
i read it, and if i spotted it even if you didn't tell me i would read it.
(Apr. 14, 2011  10:24 PM)pikabattler Wrote: i read it, and if i spotted it even if you didn't tell me i would read it.

hah, I know you did, and I appreciate that, but not many people read it Uncertain, can't really whine though- my chapters aren't always the longest, although I would still like some criticism on my story writing
ok im going to try something, this chapter wont go long if i try this, im basically just waiting to access the global link.

chapter 7: the first mission:
'zip zip zip zip'. "how do you get used to them?" asked Dracoon after traveling in another transportation pod (the elevator tube thing). "you do, just not quickly, I've been here for about 2 years so this is actually quite calming now, but i hated them when i first got in one." answered Blake. "where are we then?" ask Scar. "err you may be a little shocked but the American transportation center for the organization, from here we can go anywhere in the world." answered Blake again. "eh, at this rate nothing surprises me," said Chloe. "well we better get going, we need to get to Egypt as soon as possible," said Blake. "then wouldn't it be faster to go from japan?" asked Dracoon. "err, no. the pod from japan to Egypt is so slow it takes 2 days to get there, from here we can get there in 10 minutes because his place is super fast in any pod." answered Blake," now lets go, those guys could already have the bey." they followed Blake to a busy intersection of pods and people. not one pod wasn't being used. "wow, busy," said Scar. "and this is a slow day, you should see it on a Wednesday." said Blake, "anyway this is the pod dock we want, i just hope there is 4 left." "6 pods left in dock, how many do you want?" that was a robotic voice that activated when Blake hit a button. "good, 4 please." answered Blake. up came a pod. "Dracoon, you are up first." Dracoon got in the pod and the door closed. the pod went up, turned it's self over so Dracoon was on his back a zip, he sped forward in a very smooth movement that made the ride pleasant, like a plane ride without turbulence. Dracoon actually fell to sleep for 5 minutes before a voice told him he was almost at Egypt. zip, ding! "wow this is probably the least busy place in this organization," said Dracoon. 'zip, ding.' "wow this place is boring compare to the other places," said Scar as he walked out of his pod, "you would think this place would be more active." 'zip, ding, zip, ding.' "mmm, strange, this place looks empty," said Chloe. "normally is on Saturday nights," explained Blake. "night? it's only mid-day?" said Scar. "you forgot time difference," explained Dracoon. "oh, right." "well what are we waiting for? lets get going." said Chloe. "we are waiting for one of our top Egyptian spy's, and she isn't even Egyptian, she just knows Egypt like the back of her hand, her name is Kid Druman," said Blake, "her code name is The Reader." 'zip, ding.' "yawn, man i hate night missions," said a 18 year old girl who just arrived on the other side of the room. "oh good there she is now," said Blake. "oh good your all ready, wait who are these guys?" asked Kid. "well this is Scar, Dracoon and..." started Blake "Chloe, i used to be the spy for her but then i was sent as the spy for the arsonist actions at Egypt, still am," said Kid. "well are we ready to go?" asked Scar. "yep, let's go.
'zip zip zip zip zip,' "ok we are here," said Blake. "where?" asked Scar. "look behind you," answered Kid. he turned around to view a huge camp site in the middle of the baron desert. "so?" asked Scar, "it's just a camp site." "its the gadget site for Egypt, it's also where we get more information for our mission," answered Blake. "oh, ok," said Scar. all 5 walked up to the biggest tent, the mission briefing tent. there was a man standing at the end of the tent. "since you are late we will give you 5 a short brief," said the man. "sorry Clarance, Kid was a little late and the pods were slow," said Blake. "well then, here is your mission, there is a camp 4 kilometers north with the arsonist digging away for a bey said to control the power of the first sun and part of the key trio, it's name is sol blaze, the other 2 are called sol blaze eclipse, the bey of the first dark star, and sol blaze gold, the bey of the golden sun, a sun made of golden energy that not even Ra or the legendary beys created or know who created it." started Clarance, "sol blaze and sol blaze eclipse was used by Ra and Dark Ra in the first god war, but were lost in meteorites after the war, turns out one landed here. your mission is to find the bey before they do." "understandable, a super powerful bey that controls the first burning ball of fire in the universe and the beyblade arsonist want it," said Dracoon. "these are the gadgets you have access to during this mission. Kid, will you do the honors? asked Clarance. "yes, first this is the portadrill, a cube that unfolds into a automatic drill, created by Chloe's dad actually," said Kid. "Wait, my dad MADE that!?" asked Chloe. "yes, your dad worked for us as an inventor, this is why we think your uncle is part of the arsonist organization," answered Kid "wow, he always was the garage dad, didn't think he made anything good, but here it is," said Chloe in an emotional wispier. "we also have the digital bey launcher, launches high speed digital beys, set to cyber Pegasis 90R2F, the pen pick axe and drill in one, for when you find the meteorite, and finally our greatest invention, the invisibility field generator," finished off Kid. "well we better get to the proposed site of where the bey is," said Blake. each team member grabbed their bags of food and gadgets and set out for their transport. "CAMELS!" yelled Scar and Chloe.
end of chapter 7.
ooh, Egypt, I have a feeling 3 familiar characters I loaned to you will appear some time soon Tongue_out
(Apr. 17, 2011  5:28 AM)Soopah Wrote: ooh, Egypt, I have a feeling 3 familiar characters I loaned to you will appear some time soon Tongue_out
i have a feeling miens come in
(Apr. 17, 2011  8:38 PM)jcmanaf Wrote:
(Apr. 17, 2011  5:28 AM)Soopah Wrote: ooh, Egypt, I have a feeling 3 familiar characters I loaned to you will appear some time soon Tongue_out
i have a feeling miens come in
I made a team of Egyptian bladers long before you posted your character, I really think my characters will come in rather than yours xD, but i'm sure he has plans for yous some time soon Tongue_out
(Apr. 17, 2011  10:39 PM)Soopah Wrote:
(Apr. 17, 2011  8:38 PM)jcmanaf Wrote:
(Apr. 17, 2011  5:28 AM)Soopah Wrote: ooh, Egypt, I have a feeling 3 familiar characters I loaned to you will appear some time soon Tongue_out
i have a feeling miens come in
I made a team of Egyptian bladers long before you posted your character, I really think my characters will come in rather than yours xD, but i'm sure he has plans for yous some time soon Tongue_out
maybe mines breaks all of urs!
(Apr. 18, 2011  12:23 AM)jcmanaf Wrote:
(Apr. 17, 2011  10:39 PM)Soopah Wrote:
(Apr. 17, 2011  8:38 PM)jcmanaf Wrote:
(Apr. 17, 2011  5:28 AM)Soopah Wrote: ooh, Egypt, I have a feeling 3 familiar characters I loaned to you will appear some time soon Tongue_out
i have a feeling miens come in
I made a team of Egyptian bladers long before you posted your character, I really think my characters will come in rather than yours xD, but i'm sure he has plans for yous some time soon Tongue_out
maybe mines breaks all of urs!
the egyptian team I made specializes in breaking others beys easily-I highly doubt that your character will break every single one of their beys-don't make your character seems impossibly strong against a team that was created to be the ''best'' in Egypt