Ray Unicorno D125CS Article Attempt

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OP Edited. Added some content to the CS section and the Unicorno section. I also added an other versions section. If you know any others, PM me.
There are a few Random Booster versions of Unicorno.

RBV5:
Burn Unicorno SW145JB
Poison Unicorno 130HF
What color did Burn Unicorno come in?
(Jan. 08, 2011  3:09 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: What color did Burn Unicorno come in?

Orange with purple highlights.
Thanks. Added. Anything else I need to add?
Also, I think I remember in a thread that CS was good for Attack with the Sonokong Version, while the TT Version was better for Defense.

I'm not sure if all CS's start more towards defense when it's fresh.
So a Mold Variation? Someone else should write about this. I still don't have any version of Unicorno yet. This entire article is based on what I've read, seen and what's already in my personal schema.
I don't think it's really a Mold variation, but they just act differently.

Anyways, this is from what I've read in the "Is WB still top-tier?" thread.
Alright. I'll add this right now. But does it have to be that specific version or will it still be good no matter which one you have.

EDIT: Perhaps this was un-clear, so I will rephrase the question. In order for it to be good for Attack, is the SonoKong version a "must"? Or will it still have good win-rates with the TT version?
I do not think it is a "must".

Wearing both versions down a lot will probably result in the same effect, and maybe the Sonokong CS can move more than a TT CS when it is still mint, but it isn't enough to be a must.
(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: The face of Ray Unicorno depicts Monoceros, the Unicorn constellation in space.
One of the 88 constellations in space would be more uniform with Beywiki standards.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: The Unicorno clear wheel was released as a Teal-ish green color.
Unicorno was initially released in a teal tint (colour would also be acceptable).

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: It features three Unicorn horns which are colored orange and go along with the three Unicorn heads on the Clear Wheel.
Unicorn is not capitalized.

"It features three unicorns with orange horns." or something like that would be more succinct.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: When combined with a thin Metal Wheel such as Flame, and a low track, it can be used as a Destabilizer and a Smash Attacker all in one.
Is there proof of this? I don't recall clear wheels ever giving additional smash attack.

Comma splice. Destabilizer should not be capitalized.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: The horns of Unicorno provide low beyblades using the Unicorno wheel with Smash Attack capabilities, as well as Destabilizing capabilities.
Again, is there proof?
Destabilizing should not be capitalized.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: A combo with those attack qualities is Flame Unicorno 100/90SF
Missing full stop.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: Ray has slight gaps between the protrusions on the outer part of the wheel, for Smash Attack, and the gaps curve outwards more on the inner part of Ray.
Comma splice.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: Ray also features the Letters R-A-Y next to one of each of the protrusions, adding to Ray's aesthetics and design.
"...one of each of the protrusions..." is very awkward phrasing.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: Ray has shown some prominent Smash Attack when placed at the 100 Track, but since WB has been predominantly outclassed, Ray cannot keep up with RS, RSF, or CS, and is therefore outclassed as an Attack Wheel.
Awkward phrasing.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: For defense, if C145 and/or GB145 are inaccesible, D125 has atleast some decensy in the combo MF Earth Bull D125RS/RSF/CS. For stamina, D125 has alright use in the combo Burn Bull D125D/SD/WD.
Spelling and grammar errors bolded.

You have way too many slashes here. "Alright use" is too colloquial.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: The bottom is essentially an FS except that the "attack mode" of CS is produced by the rubber coat, thus, making CS a more effective version of FS.
Awkward phrasing + comma splicing.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: This bottom produces different attack patterns, and like FS, goes into an aggressive movement when either hit onto the stadium's slope, or shot while banking.
"...goes into an aggressive movement..."
Erm, what?
Moves aggressively, moves in an aggresive pattern... etc.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: CS has also shown potential as a defense bottom from several tests that were produced, due to CS moving on to it's rubber surface area when it get's hit onto the slope of the stadium.
It's "its" and "gets".

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: However, often when Bladers use CS straight out of the box, they can't seem to get it to be very agressive.
"can't seem"
Makes the article seem unsure.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: So it's suggested you wear down the Sharp part before any competetive situation so that you can use CS' "attack mode" more effectively.
Awkward phrasing.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: But, often the rubber coat get's over used and eventually wears until it can no longer touch the stadium without the Beyblade scraping the floor.
"gets" "overused"
Comma splice.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: This is why getting multiple Unicornos is necessary.
This does not go in the Bottom section.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: Use in Attack/Defense customization:

CS has shown good attack potential in many attack combos. Those combos are Aquario 90CS, MF Galaxy _______ CH120CS, MF Quetzalcoatl CH120CS and MF Lightning LDrago GB145CS. For defense, the combo MF Earth Bull GB145/C145CS has shown good defense potential with CS.
Just... ugh.

Too many combos, and split up the attack and defense customs.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: Ray Unicorno D125CS Aurora Version (Transparent+Putple Horns, Purple Metal Wheel and transparent Track and Bottom.
"purple"
Missing end parenthesis.
Horns should not be capitalized. Purple should not be capitalized.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: Burn Unicorno SW145JB - Random Booster Vol.5 Grand Ketos (Orange+Purple Horns)
Poison Unicorno 130HF - Random Booster Vol.5 Grand Ketos (Yellow+Blue Horns)
Purple, blue and horns should not be capitalized.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: All of Ray Unicorno's parts have some, if not really good, potential when put in unison with certain parts. Every blader should own multiples of this beyblade.
Terrible phrasing.
Some of the blame goes on me too, for my Ray description. I'll edit mine soon, thanks Daegor!

I have trouble with fixing comma splicing though ...
Fixing these right now. Thanks Daegor.

EDIT: Ray Joker, I'm editing the section right now. Feel free to just copy it off here once I'm done.
I've actually edited mine now, so shall we compare?

(Nov. 26, 2010  6:28 PM)Ray Joker Wrote: Metal Wheel: Ray
Weight: 29.6 grams
Ray consists of a three separated protrusions for providing Smash Attack. Ray has slight gaps between the protrusions on the outer part of the wheel for Smash Attack. The gaps curve outwards more on the inner part of Ray. Each protrusion has a flat front with a tip slightly slanted upwards on the end. In the inside of Ray, the letters R-A-Y can be seen on the top of each protrusion. Every protrusion has two slightly squared dents that allow for stickers to be placed on them, with a total of six stickers that can be placed on the sides of the Wheel. Three more stickers can also be placed on the top of Ray.

Ray has shown some prominent Smash Attack when placed at the 100 Track. Due to the removal of WB, however, Ray cannot keep up with RS, RSF, or CS, and is therefore outclassed as an Attack Wheel.

I probably still need some editing with grammatical stuff.
This is my version:

Quote:Metal Wheel: Ray

Ray consists of a three-winged design, each with separated protrusions for providing Smash Attack. Ray has slight gaps between the protrusions on the outer part of the wheel for Smash Attack, and the gaps curve outwards more on the inner part of Ray. Ray also features the Letters R-A-Y next to each of the protrusions, adding to Ray's aesthetics and design. Each protrusion has a flat front with a tip slightly slanted upwards on the end. On each of the protrusions are two slightly squared dents that allow for stickers to be placed on them, with a total of six stickers that can be placed on the protrusions.

Ray has shown some prominent Smash Attack when placed at the 100 Track. However, WB is now outclassed, which leaves Ray to only be used against CS, RS or RSF based Defense types. But since Ray is unable to keep up with these said Defense types, Ray has become outclassed.

I personally like your version better, so I'll use that one instead. Thanks Joker.

EDIT: I found more comma splicing, so I'll fix that.
(Jan. 08, 2011  4:10 AM)Ray Joker Wrote: Due to the removal of WB, however, Ray cannot keep up with RS, RSF, or CS, and is therefore outclassed as an Attack Wheel.
Needs expansion.
(Jan. 08, 2011  4:13 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: However, WB is now outclassed, which leaves Ray to only be used against CS, RS or RSF based Defense types. But since Ray is unable to keep up with these said Defense types, Ray has become outclassed.
Better. Remove the "but", and replace the last Ray with "it".

Also, why do you switch from saying wing to protrusion?
So combining would be better.

Sorry about the wing thing (referring that you meant the "three winged-design" statement), I got that from the Storm article. I'll edit it.

EDIT: Okay, I edited it now.
I don't know. It sounds a lot more advanced than "wing" in my opinion, so that's probably why.
I edited it.

I always thought that the Ray wheel looked like Unicorn Horns or the back of a horse's head where the hair part is, for some odd reason.

EDIT: Also remembered, Ray can fit 9 stickers, I forgot to put that on the Ray section, where I put six instead.

DOUBLE EDIT: I also merged your bottom post with my top post and gave you credit, thanks!
(Jan. 08, 2011  4:10 AM)Ray Joker Wrote: I've actually edited mine now, so shall we compare?

(Nov. 26, 2010  6:28 PM)Ray Joker Wrote: Metal Wheel: Ray
Weight: 29.6 grams
Ray consists of a three separated protrusions for providing Smash Attack. Ray has slight gaps between the protrusions on the outer part of the wheel for Smash Attack. The gaps curve outwards more on the inner part of Ray. Each protrusion has a flat front with a tip slightly slanted upwards on the end. In the inside of Ray, the letters R-A-Y can be seen on the top of each protrusion. Every protrusion has two slightly squared dents that allow for stickers to be placed on them, with a total of six stickers that can be placed on the sides of the Wheel. Three more stickers can also be placed on the top of Ray.

Ray has shown some prominent Smash Attack when placed at the 100 Track. Due to the removal of WB, however, Ray cannot keep up with RS, RSF, or CS, and is therefore outclassed as an Attack Wheel.

I probably still need some editing with grammatical stuff.

Unnecessary "a" in there. I've also fixed the comma splicing for you. Feel free to copy it once' I'm done making all the edits.
I think the article is almost (if not already) finished, with all the help of the members and all it looks great!
Made all the necessary edits. I had removed the part of the Clear Wheel about use in Attack, as I had only made that for content. Thanks UnLeAsHeD for the positive feedback.
Do any more edits need to be made? I'm completely open to any criticism there is.
Thanks everyone for your help, and thank's again UnLeAsHeD for the positive feedback. I PMed this to Kei for approval. If he gives this the green light, I'll finally get my first face and had made a contribution to the forums. *Crosses fingers*.
(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: For defense, if C145 and/or GB145 are un-available, D125 has at least some decent use in the combo MF Earth Bull D125RS/RSF/CS. For stamina, D125 has alright use in the combo Burn Bull D125D/SD/WD.
You still haven't fixed this section. In fact, I think you've made it worse since I last checked.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: Thus making CS a more effective version of FS.
Sentence fragment.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: This bottom produces different attack patterns, and like FS, moves aggresively when either hit onto the stadium's slope, or shot while banking.
First comma should be after "and", not before it.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: However, often when Bladers use CS straight out of the box, they are unable to get it to be very agressive.
"aggressive"

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: So it's suggested that you wear down the "Sharp" part of this bottom before you use it in any competetive situation, so that you can use CS' "attack mode" more effectively.
Awkward phrasing!
"competitive"

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: One in-explainable, yet interesting aspect about CS, is that the Korean version from SonoKong, is a tad bit more suited for Attack, where as the Japanese version from Takara-Tomy, is just a little bit more suited for Defense.
This whole sentence is full of comma splices. This sentence also seem fallacious and colloquial to me.
Also, unexplainable or inexplicable is better than inexplainable.

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: For defense, the combo MF Earth Bull/Aquario GB145/C145CS has shown good defense potential with Coat Sharp as it's bottom.
Pick ONE combo, as I have stressed many times before.
"its"

(Jul. 07, 2010  3:45 AM)ShadowPegasis Wrote: All of Ray Unicorno's parts have shown lots of potential as soon as it was tested by the community. By far, Ray and CS are the most useful parts from this Beyblade. However due to Coat Sharp's wearing, it's better to have multiple copies of Coat Sharp. This is why getting multiple Unicornos is necessary. Every blader should own multiples of this beyblade.
I do not like this overall section at all.
I can't edit anything at the moment. I'm on the road, and doing this on my phone. Making edits on my phone would take too long, so I'll edit it later.