Okay, I finished the idea. It came from a bunch of people saying that the recent NCAA suspensions are "Stupid" and "unfair" because student-athletes make huge money for their school, and never see any of it. Same with high schools. A lot of bad schools get their funding from football and other major sports. So what if sports scholarships didn't exist, and students got PAID to play? Well, for one, the parents would likely drop more financial responsibility onto their kids, and the schools would immediately become like the NBA. Rich teams win. The main character will be playing for a broke, disgraced, pushover of a school's Football team on the verge of being shut down. The team needs to manage a measly 4-16 record to stay afloat, or win against one specific team. Why do I set the bar so low? One, the team has the lowest payroll in the country, and two I intend on writing up a bunch of losses. What do you guys think?
General Writing Thread
I like it. It's good you added something to the idea of a "dream win out of a terrible football team" cliché. Add drama by going deep into the coach and a few of the players-give them all backstories and personal things they must overcome off of the field. It'll add depth and character development to your story.
My mom and I got into a bit of a fight and, me being me, came up with an idea for a book. I told her I thought life was just kinda...boring (It's true though!) because everything's just so monotonous and repetitive.
So I typed up a chapter for it. C+C? (Click to View)
The name "Shades of Gray and Gray" sounds cool to me, but the idea is amazing. (Hint: Use the name!) Capitalize the P in plague, maybe? That's my only advice, if it's the focus of the book.
I just typed this up for a character's background story
Amidst the ruins of a once amazing fortress, Izuma Inzori, the Silver Shadow, knelt, weeping, beside the lifeless body of his dead comrade. His tears fell, drop by drop, to the stone floor. Around them, thousands upon thousands of their enemies lay, felled by the final attack of Blaze Mizuki. Izuma slowly stood. He knew what Blaze wanted him to do, find his younger brother, Inferno Mizuki, now the last of the Fire-Sages.
Izuma scoured the land, searching for young men talented in the art of fire techniques. There were thousands of them. Izuma wondered how he would ascertain which one of them was Inferno. What only made it worse was that Inferno went under the name of Phipilus. And none of them had that name.
One hot summer day, an alarm sounded within our fortress. It was an approaching person. From the security cameras, a warrior clad in red with the emblem of the Fire-Sages on his back was observed. Izuma was watching the security cameras and muttered under his breath, “I wonder if this is really Inferno Mizuki.†He approached the gates, and readied a sword of fire. I leapt from inside and drew my twin kantanas. We faced off. I said, “Who are you, and what is your business here?†he replied, “I am Inferno Mizuki, and I have come to take my brother, Blaze Mizuki’s place as the 6th Shadow, the Fire Shadow.†I replied, “If so, then you should be able to harm me, as your brother did, for I am Izuma Inzori, the 2nd Shadow, Defender of Light, the Silver Shadow, Slayer of Darkness, second only to the Wind Shadow!†He exclaimed, “So be it! We shall duel!â€
After the long and deadly fight, Inferno managed to strike Izuma where Blaze always did. Izuma grinned and said, “Hah, well done, only you and your brother could do such attacks and harm me in the very same place! Welcome to the team, Inferno Muziki!†Inferno sighed, “Thank you, Izuma-san, however, I have a question, is Blaze-san still alive?†Izuma sighed deeply; he knew that Blaze’s death was going to be hard for Inferno to handle. Izuma slowly replied, “No, he died in the hundred-thousand assault. But he died with honor, taking ninety thousand foes to the grave with him. A true Shadow, he was, and may you carry his mantle, Inferno.â€
CnCs?
Amidst the ruins of a once amazing fortress, Izuma Inzori, the Silver Shadow, knelt, weeping, beside the lifeless body of his dead comrade. His tears fell, drop by drop, to the stone floor. Around them, thousands upon thousands of their enemies lay, felled by the final attack of Blaze Mizuki. Izuma slowly stood. He knew what Blaze wanted him to do, find his younger brother, Inferno Mizuki, now the last of the Fire-Sages.
Izuma scoured the land, searching for young men talented in the art of fire techniques. There were thousands of them. Izuma wondered how he would ascertain which one of them was Inferno. What only made it worse was that Inferno went under the name of Phipilus. And none of them had that name.
One hot summer day, an alarm sounded within our fortress. It was an approaching person. From the security cameras, a warrior clad in red with the emblem of the Fire-Sages on his back was observed. Izuma was watching the security cameras and muttered under his breath, “I wonder if this is really Inferno Mizuki.†He approached the gates, and readied a sword of fire. I leapt from inside and drew my twin kantanas. We faced off. I said, “Who are you, and what is your business here?†he replied, “I am Inferno Mizuki, and I have come to take my brother, Blaze Mizuki’s place as the 6th Shadow, the Fire Shadow.†I replied, “If so, then you should be able to harm me, as your brother did, for I am Izuma Inzori, the 2nd Shadow, Defender of Light, the Silver Shadow, Slayer of Darkness, second only to the Wind Shadow!†He exclaimed, “So be it! We shall duel!â€
After the long and deadly fight, Inferno managed to strike Izuma where Blaze always did. Izuma grinned and said, “Hah, well done, only you and your brother could do such attacks and harm me in the very same place! Welcome to the team, Inferno Muziki!†Inferno sighed, “Thank you, Izuma-san, however, I have a question, is Blaze-san still alive?†Izuma sighed deeply; he knew that Blaze’s death was going to be hard for Inferno to handle. Izuma slowly replied, “No, he died in the hundred-thousand assault. But he died with honor, taking ninety thousand foes to the grave with him. A true Shadow, he was, and may you carry his mantle, Inferno.â€
CnCs?
As to Sparta's; Epic. Just plain epic. I don't see any mistakes, and it all seems promising. I'm waiting for more...
Well, I think, that in honor of my birthday, I'll write something in second-person present-tense. I'll post it here when I'm done.
Also, should I use an amnesiac as my novel's main character?As
Well, I think, that in honor of my birthday, I'll write something in second-person present-tense. I'll post it here when I'm done.
Also, should I use an amnesiac as my novel's main character?As
Happy Birthday TITAN!!!!!
I'm currently hard at work on a short story called I Collect The Bodies. It's about fear and how it can corrupt emotions and control human actions, and the story is told by the embodiment of death. I'm going to try and turn it in for my english class if the teacher finds it school appropriate, as there is a lot of death and some suicide. I'll probably post it on here after I get my grade back for the assginment, since I don't want anyone to think I plagiarized or anything.
Sparta: I really like what you have written so far for that story. The idea of it is really interesting, and after reading it, I've been walking around questioning why I'm doing the things that I'm doing. I think that it could really turn into something great, and I really want to read more of it.
I'm currently hard at work on a short story called I Collect The Bodies. It's about fear and how it can corrupt emotions and control human actions, and the story is told by the embodiment of death. I'm going to try and turn it in for my english class if the teacher finds it school appropriate, as there is a lot of death and some suicide. I'll probably post it on here after I get my grade back for the assginment, since I don't want anyone to think I plagiarized or anything.
Sparta: I really like what you have written so far for that story. The idea of it is really interesting, and after reading it, I've been walking around questioning why I'm doing the things that I'm doing. I think that it could really turn into something great, and I really want to read more of it.
OK, so I was looking around and stumbled on GFX teams. Aura was really smart to make that, and I got thinking...
What about writing teams? 3 people per team, and you can start or join battles made by other teams. It's also sort of a community, where you have team members to help you make a great piece of writing to be used in a team battle. Yes? No?
What about writing teams? 3 people per team, and you can start or join battles made by other teams. It's also sort of a community, where you have team members to help you make a great piece of writing to be used in a team battle. Yes? No?
Definitely! I love the idea!
I'd be glad with that, dibs on Sparta and Temporal, ha! no but it sounds like a good idea, 3 styles of writing seems important to help increase our own writing.
I'm gonna try to make a writing forum, so we'd all have a place dedicated to what we're good at. I'll see, but I'm sure I can do it (Takin' my talents down to Time Beach! Note: Temporal means "having to do with time".)
I remember when Sparta made a writing forum, but then the host shut down. I had an epic ping-pong story on there...
Also, we just finished learning about ancient Egypt, so I'm thinkin' about making something about Howard Carter-the guy who found king tut's tomb-and king tut. (sorry for the messed up capitalization; my iPod is screwin' up)
Also, we just finished learning about ancient Egypt, so I'm thinkin' about making something about Howard Carter-the guy who found king tut's tomb-and king tut. (sorry for the messed up capitalization; my iPod is screwin' up)
Yeah, apparently, topixcube shut down or something. Me no happy...
Yay, you finally have a bio on your profile!
I forgot to mention, I think I'm going to use one of your poems for a school assignment. We were told to find our favorite poem and bring it in, and I really like one of them!
Yay, you finally have a bio on your profile!
I forgot to mention, I think I'm going to use one of your poems for a school assignment. We were told to find our favorite poem and bring it in, and I really like one of them!
Oh, really? That's pretty cool. Which one?
I'm not sure 'bout the title, but I said it reminded me of "charge of the light brigade". It was epic!
Also, I'm looking for people to be in a writing team led by me.
Also, I'm looking for people to be in a writing team led by me.
Okay! I'm about done with the site for now. I've got almost everything done, and only the theme is left. I'll be done soon. (Maybe in three hours.)
Ugh, IE's being obnoxiously stupid, so give me a minute. I need to download Firefox now.
IT'S ALIVE! Done. The link is here: http://s11.zetaboards.com/PenPad_forums/index/
Yes, I put Hatsune Miku on it. Any issues? No? Good. Also: I figure that that "Zetaboards thingie on top is supposed to be my logo. I hate it. Can any GFXers help a brotha out? (Remind me never to talk like that again.)
Ugh, IE's being obnoxiously stupid, so give me a minute. I need to download Firefox now.
IT'S ALIVE! Done. The link is here: http://s11.zetaboards.com/PenPad_forums/index/
Yes, I put Hatsune Miku on it. Any issues? No? Good. Also: I figure that that "Zetaboards thingie on top is supposed to be my logo. I hate it. Can any GFXers help a brotha out? (Remind me never to talk like that again.)
Okay! NooDoo Soup agreed to help me out! So in a while, I'll be totally done! Until then, we can still use the forum. I'll check on the threads, and see if I need to make any more.
One member! Thanks, SwiftShadow!
One member! Thanks, SwiftShadow!
I'll join, but you should make a thread for this site. You'd get more people to see it.
I like being transparent, so once we have a staff, the staff forums will be open to read. As in: You'll know what we're talking about. Warning, it might get very off-topic, hah. In fact, I have an idea of who I want as a staff. I was going to, but I got kinda concerned about it, but I'll do that.
You need to make sure for staff that you don't pick people because they ask you, but because you really think they'll moderate well. Just because someone's the first to join or whatever and they ask doesn't mean you have to make them staff.
Temporal I joined, and I hope I can contribute well to the thread, I was wondering, could I post a story ideas for stories in seperate threads, even if I won't make the story? or should I make a thread for just random ideas you've had?
Already will. "Random Writing thoughts" Ideas will go there, barring a Ideas thread. Anyway, let's move this to the thread for it.