[Writing Tournament] Winners Announced - Congratulations!

I probely lost the first round Unhappy, but it's okay it's for fun!!Stupid
I forwarded them all off to Temporal. Now we wait Eee
Sent mine. I can assure you, I tried to make it as cliche-free as possible. I think I actually did a good job this time around :p
Heh, the semi finals and the finals are not going to be Beyblades related (the subject isn't going to be, but you can write about Beyblades if you'd like). For this round, I explained the subject thoroughly As the tournament progresses, I will explain less.
So exactly who did advance to the next round?
We have it all judged out and all the advancees. Just got to finish up writing a couple of comments for all the stories so they will see why the made it/did not.
Entries for the first round! Well done everybody!
  • NoodooSoup! (Click to View)
    Quite vague indeed. But it is a simple storyline with a lot of detail, which catches my eyes. Your writing shows promise in the next round, congrats! At the end, the question is very philosophical. In a way he was desperate to steal it. But that doesn’t entitle him to. I guess you could take it both ways. Once again, extremely well done in all aspects. My second is Noodoo. As usual, her story defies normal logic. Why pass down a legendary beyblade when you can steal it? One of her usual great ideas shine through here. There is an awkward sentence or two, especially at the beginning of paragraphs, but the story was genuinely nice to read, the grammar was good, and spelling wasn't an issue. She'd get an 8.5/10. She'd get a 9.5 if it hadn't been for the awkward paragraph beginnings.

  • Ga'Hooleone! (Click to View)
    Easily my favourite. Nice story line that flows quite well. The implementation of the legend into the actual story is also a smooth transition. Nothing more to say but insta-win. My first pick, surprisingly, is Ga. In a round where brick walls of text were everywhere, nobody but possibly Noodoo had better organization. He obviously paid attention to detail. His story was also pretty engaging, if not cliched a bit. But the theme was cliche, so he gets off the hook today. Oh, well. That's my first pick, and I'd give it a 8/10. Work on the cliches, and it'd get a 9.5. (I don't believe in 10s. Not anymore, anyway.)

  • Another Archfiend tale? The story about a deep bond with the bey's spirit and the creator(owner). Quite interesting how the hate has a direct relation and ends up being the demise of a whole dynasty.But one thing I must point out ... too many commas. Nice work though!






  • A short and classic wall of text. No offense, the story line has some promise, but try to space it out a bit.

  • DefStamina88! (Click to View)
    You had to make your own Beyblade, sorry Def, but you're disqualified (maybe next time).
    Next is DefStamina. As expected from an experienced writer, there is no wall of text here. But there is an issue. Too cliched. WAY too cliched. This writing only lives because of the lack of organization in this round. Frankly, it's not that great. But there are no grammar issues, which plague the other writers, and most words are spelled right. I don't like the Basalt love or the instant-evolution, but it's the best of a bad group. Def, you lucked out. 7/10


  • ChinaBlade! (Click to View)
    Nice and short. Has a moral behind it. The ending though, doesn't that mean he could lay waste to his village in seconds?


  • The gimmicks are all explained well like in real life. I like the realistic appeal, haha. Bu unfortunately, it wouldn't be fair to qualify you since you didn't make the beyblade.Last is War. War reminds me of me when I first started, so I might be biased. Surprisingly, the dialogue, even though it was done wrong, is still pretty easy to follow. While the idea is still cliched, they all are. The main point here is that there is a moral here. A moral, in a beyblade story!? Unthinkable! Anyway, this is another prospect pick. I doubt War will make it past the likes of Noodoo and Ga, and Shirayuki is a bit better than War. Nice work though.


  • Shirayuki! (Click to View)
    Some spelling mistakes. But Temporal sees promise in you!Fourth is Shirayuki, who actually did better than Def. I liked the way the story flowed, but something is missing. It moved too fast. There's little description, and...it's CLICHED! So what redeems the story? Plastics. Nobody else used them, and that makes this original. This is a pure prospect pick. I want to see how far Shirayuki can go in this tournament. I want to see if Shirayuki can improve over the course of the tournament. And most of all, this writer can become a dark horse of the next round if they play their cards right. I don't know WHAT to give this story.

  • MasterBlader-x (Click to View)
    Classic Alpha/Omega stuff. Spelling mistakes and capitalization issues everywhere. Remember to polish your work next time. WOT.

  • A bit all over the place. Some spelling mistakes. Seems a bit wacky and jumbled up. Nice work though!

And there you have it. All ten glorious entries. Temporal's comments are the colored ones! The advancers are ...
  • Zancrow!
  • Ga'Hooleone!
  • ChinaBlade!
  • Shirayuki!
  • NarwhalSoup XD

Your next round subject will be given tonight at 9 PM. Stay tuned and remember, only three will advance to the finals!

Phoof, that was some copy and pasting XD

*ignore the spelling mistakes and other grammatical issues with my post, my left eye just drifted asleep D:
Phew! I made it!
.... Oh carp.
I forgot to think about that. Pinching_eyes
I had just gotten back from a long day of shopping and was tired.
I had to work fast.
I'm such an idiot sometimes.
What? I advanced and Def didn't? This be wacky yo.
I have the post all written out. Just need to press the button at nine o'clock.

As with any tournament, the rounds get harder!

(Aug. 15, 2012  12:43 AM)Shirayuki Wrote: What? I advanced and Def didn't? This be wacky yo.

He was a pick, so was War. But one small mistake snatched away the victory. We wil be having more tournaments, so watch out for the rules next time. So damn sorry, but bending the rules would be unfair to the others who had made Beyblades.
Awesome, procrastination can still make a good story.

I'm excited to see if Noodoo and I make it to the finals, then I'd really have to try hard! Grin

Looking forward to the next round.
(Aug. 15, 2012  12:43 AM)Insomniac Wrote: But one small mistake snatched away the victory.

Oh Dear Jezus that makes me rethink mine. o_o
I'm so scared now.
I won't make it. Pinching_eyes
The rules for that round were strict to keep everyone in check and sort of "weed-out" the nice ones. But yeah, the next two rounds will have loads of freedom. No word limit, no Beyblades.

(Aug. 15, 2012  12:47 AM)Frieza Wrote:
(Aug. 15, 2012  12:43 AM)Insomniac Wrote: But one small mistake snatched away the victory.

Oh Dear Jezus that makes me rethink mine. o_o
I'm so scared now.
I won't make it. Pinching_eyes

Procrastination is the key to victory.
(Aug. 15, 2012  12:51 AM)Shirayuki Wrote:
(Aug. 15, 2012  12:47 AM)Frieza Wrote:
(Aug. 15, 2012  12:43 AM)Insomniac Wrote: But one small mistake snatched away the victory.

Oh Dear Jezus that makes me rethink mine. o_o
I'm so scared now.
I won't make it. Pinching_eyes

Procrastination is the key to victory.

Wrong quote there. I believe you are referring to Ga's post XD

nope, I'm not. haha, cause everything I do is correct Smug

I did quote the wrong post...
Good job, you guys! Especially you, Ga, great execution.

Yep, mine definitely had some awkward sentences; I still need to polish it. Anyone notice the pseudo steampunk theme? I attempted to mix that and a sort of early 1900s NYC theme. Not very well.

Hah, the competition only gets better.
I saw a Legend of Korra similarity, which is obviously that exact blend you are referring to.

Only, instead of Bolin and Mako, it's an unnamed boy and girl. But yeah, I can see the theme pervading your story.
Congrats guys, and good luckWink
28 minutes left.
The second round's subject is "Run with it".

That is the only information, interpret it as you wish. Beyblade is not a requirement. Use it as a moral, as a punch line, as a thesis, whatever. No limits on the length this time!

The last round will have even less explanation. Which leaves even more room for creativity. In fact, the last round's topic is only going to be two words Chocked_2

Your entries will be accepted via PM no longer than 11:59 PM August 15th EST
(Aug. 15, 2012  2:02 AM)Insomniac Wrote: The second round's subject is "Run with it".

That is the only information, interpret it as you wish. Beyblade is not a requirement. Use it as a moral, as a punch line, as a thesis, whatever. No limits on the length this time!

The last round will have even less explanation. Which leaves even more room for creativity. In fact, the last round's topic is only going to be two words Chocked_2

Your entries will be accepted via PM no longer than 11:59 PM August 15th EST

*Eye twitch*
What!?
Ugh! I'm so dead! Pinching_eyes_2
So I can make it like 2 sentences?
Nice one. I can't wait to see everyone else's take on this.