[Blog]  Beyblade Fanfics Club/Discussions/Random Thoughts

Alright. Ill take some time to read it right now and maybe tomorrow (unless you have a specific thing you want critiqued). It looks like its far in so Ill probably need to skim through it first /lh

(Mar. 19, 2021  5:25 AM)Longinox Wrote:
(Mar. 19, 2021  4:18 AM)XSabxManiacX Wrote: Haha, been awhile I spoke here (I think; Idk, time flies when youre busy with stuff). Ive ghosted my Beyblade fanfics for so long, I think Ill declare most of them discontinued of finished. I really dont feel like writing fanfics for Beyblade as much now adgjdhaksj. Since I do have a little bit more time nowadays, I hope I can poke around to see what new fanfics there are here. I still enjoy reading aha /lh

mind if you review me fanfic (Beyblade Burst Stardust)
still ongoing, i just want a little criticism to better myself

Alright, read through it. Theres not a lot I want to point out, since my writing style isnt usually in script /lh. First, Id like to comment that I like how its a blend of descriptive and play script style! It feels very much like half a play and half a regular book full of words. I think its pretty unique and help to emphasize the characters and actions more. Despite that, I think one thing you can add is more emphasize through actions. Aside from the description of the event written in paragraphs throughout the fanfic, characters could probably have more emphasis in actions and tone


What is currently in the fanfic, in an example

Character 1: How could this be?

Character 2: Surprise! That’s what my Bey can do!


Suggestion

For example, in real-world play scripts, emotions and actions would would be shown in parentheses like this:

Character 1 : (grits teeth and clenches fist) How could this be?

Character 2: (smirks and stands taller, their voice louder) Surprise! That’s what my Bey can do! 



Of course, this is a suggestion! The paragraphs of words in between the text add details and elaboration on what is going on, which I highly like. I just wanted to note that — in a play script — every time a character talks, theres usually something in parentheses that indicates a tone or action. It might add depth and more details to the scene but if you rather let people infer the tone or imagine what the character is doing atm, then feel free to! /lh Treat this lightly
(Mar. 19, 2021  6:04 AM)XSabxManiacX Wrote: Alright. Ill take some time to read it right now and maybe tomorrow (unless you have a specific thing you want critiqued). It looks like its far in so Ill probably need to skim through it first /lh

(Mar. 19, 2021  5:25 AM)Longinox Wrote: mind if you review me fanfic (Beyblade Burst Stardust)
still ongoing, i just want a little criticism to better myself

Alright, read through it. Theres not a lot I want to point out, since my writing style isnt usually in script /lh. First, Id like to comment that I like how its a blend of descriptive and play script style! It feels very much like half a play and half a regular book full of words. I think its pretty unique and help to emphasize the characters and actions more. Despite that, I think one thing you can add is more emphasize through actions. Aside from the description of the event written in paragraphs throughout the fanfic, characters could probably have more emphasis in actions and tone


What is currently in the fanfic, in an example

Character 1: How could this be?

Character 2: Surprise! That’s what my Bey can do!


Suggestion

For example, in real-world play scripts, emotions and actions would would be shown in parentheses like this:

Character 1 : (grits teeth and clenches fist) How could this be?

Character 2: (smirks and stands taller, their voice louder) Surprise! That’s what my Bey can do! 



Of course, this is a suggestion! The paragraphs of words in between the text add details and elaboration on what is going on, which I highly like. I just wanted to note that — in a play script — every time a character talks, theres usually something in parentheses that indicates a tone or action. It might add depth and more details to the scene but if you rather let people infer the tone or imagine what the character is doing atm, then feel free to! /lh Treat this lightly

Ah, thanks for that! I kind of felt something was missing in the actions of the characters as well, just didn't know what it was till' you pointed that out.
Can someone review my fan fic? It's https://worldbeyblade.org/Thread-Fan-Fic...r-FBW-Saga
(Mar. 19, 2021  5:09 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote: Can someone review my fan fic? It's https://worldbeyblade.org/Thread-Fan-Fic...r-FBW-Saga

Ideally, a fanfic page should have every chapter spoilered at the top. That way it's easy to access them all and get started on the reading.
(Mar. 19, 2021  8:57 PM)Dt20000 Wrote:
(Mar. 19, 2021  5:09 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote: Can someone review my fan fic? It's https://worldbeyblade.org/Thread-Fan-Fic...r-FBW-Saga

Ideally, a fanfic page should have every chapter spoilered at the top. That way it's easy to access them all and get started on the reading.

Yeah sorry, but can't do anything about it
You could just edit the first post and copy-paste them in
(Mar. 19, 2021  8:59 PM)Dt20000 Wrote: You could just edit the first post and copy-paste them in

well do you realize how much time that will take?
Season 1

Season 2

Here, you can copy/paste this into the first post
(Mar. 19, 2021  9:50 PM)Dt20000 Wrote: Season 1

Season 2

Here, you can copy/paste this into the first post

Am I seeing things? Or are you back!?

Well, it’s been awhile, and it’s really good to see ya.
(Mar. 19, 2021  10:18 PM)UltimateMaster Wrote:
(Mar. 19, 2021  9:50 PM)Dt20000 Wrote: Season 1

Season 2

Here, you can copy/paste this into the first post

Am I seeing things? Or are you back!?

Well, it’s been awhile, and it’s really good to see ya.

It’s all a dream

*squiggly xylophone soumds*
(Mar. 19, 2021  6:04 AM)XSabxManiacX Wrote: Alright. Ill take some time to read it right now and maybe tomorrow (unless you have a specific thing you want critiqued). It looks like its far in so Ill probably need to skim through it first /lh

(Mar. 19, 2021  5:25 AM)Longinox Wrote: mind if you review me fanfic (Beyblade Burst Stardust)
still ongoing, i just want a little criticism to better myself

Alright, read through it. Theres not a lot I want to point out, since my writing style isnt usually in script /lh. First, Id like to comment that I like how its a blend of descriptive and play script style! It feels very much like half a play and half a regular book full of words. I think its pretty unique and help to emphasize the characters and actions more. Despite that, I think one thing you can add is more emphasize through actions. Aside from the description of the event written in paragraphs throughout the fanfic, characters could probably have more emphasis in actions and tone


What is currently in the fanfic, in an example

Character 1: How could this be?

Character 2: Surprise! That’s what my Bey can do!


Suggestion

For example, in real-world play scripts, emotions and actions would be shown in parentheses like this:

Character 1 : (grits teeth and clenches fist) How could this be?

Character 2: (smirks and stands taller, their voice louder) Surprise! That’s what my Bey can do! 



Of course, this is a suggestion! The paragraphs of words in between the text add details and elaboration on what is going on, which I highly like. I just wanted to note that — in a play script — every time a character talks, theres usually something in parentheses that indicates a tone or action. It might add depth and more details to the scene but if you rather let people infer the tone or imagine what the character is doing atm, then feel free to! /lh Treat this lightly

can you grade my fan fic

(Mar. 19, 2021  9:50 PM)Dt20000 Wrote: [/spoiler]
[/spoiler]

Here, you can copy/paste this into the first post

bruh! Thanks a lot! I don't know what to say buddy! Thanks a lot.

Since you read it, do you have any suggestions? Any bad things about my fanfic?
So I have a carp ton of fic ideas that I probably won't write anytime soon because I didn't finish Ding-Dang and didn't even start Blader Brawl.
Like, I tried to make a Beyblade × YuGiOh crossover where the characters are in the monster spirit world and I already divided them into factions and all but...I don't have a plot for it. Best I can do is write their encounters as standalones that are part of the same series.
Taking a short break cause I'm too busy and i feel like all the dialogue's feel like I'm making a low effort Fanfic
(Mar. 28, 2021  8:29 PM)PinkRose Wrote: So I have a carp ton of fic ideas that I probably won't write anytime soon because I didn't finish Ding-Dang and didn't even start Blader Brawl.
Like, I tried to make a Beyblade × YuGiOh crossover where the characters are in the monster spirit world and I already divided them into factions and all but...I don't have a plot for it. Best I can do is write their encounters as standalones that are part of the same series.

maybe you can cooperate with someone who has writing skills. You have plot-building skills, world-building skills, and I think u'll be able to write a good fan fic, or more, but maybe you should team up with someone to write your first fan fic, then you'll get the idea on how to do them, then you can carry on writing your other fan fic ideas.
Anybody got any good plots for Amane’s Apocalypse part 2.
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:35 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: Anybody got any good plots for Amane’s Apocalypse part 2.

I do
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:35 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: Anybody got any good plots for Amane’s Apocalypse part 2.

dark destiny x amane apocalypse but everyone dies except amane ofc
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:36 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote:
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:35 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: Anybody got any good plots for Amane’s Apocalypse part 2.

I do

Do share.
(Mar. 29, 2021  8:08 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote:
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:36 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote: I do

Do share.

Should I type it here, or pm?
(Mar. 29, 2021  2:11 PM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote:
(Mar. 28, 2021  8:29 PM)PinkRose Wrote: So I have a carp ton of fic ideas that I probably won't write anytime soon because I didn't finish Ding-Dang and didn't even start Blader Brawl.
Like, I tried to make a Beyblade × YuGiOh crossover where the characters are in the monster spirit world and I already divided them into factions and all but...I don't have a plot for it. Best I can do is write their encounters as standalones that are part of the same series.

maybe you can cooperate with someone who has writing skills. You have plot-building skills, world-building skills, and I think u'll be able to write a good fan fic, or more, but maybe you should team up with someone to write your first fan fic, then you'll get the idea on how to do them, then you can carry on writing your other fan fic ideas.

Sounds like an idea, thx bud.
(Mar. 29, 2021  8:18 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote:
(Mar. 29, 2021  8:08 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: Do share.

Should I type it here, or pm?

Whatever you want
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:35 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: Anybody got any good plots for Amane’s Apocalypse part 2.

Choco Milk Supply is low and a war breaks out for it
(Mar. 29, 2021  9:26 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote:
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:35 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: Anybody got any good plots for Amane’s Apocalypse part 2.

Choco Milk Supply is low and a war breaks out for it

Plot Twist: Gilten's hoarding all the choco milk on purpose.
(Mar. 29, 2021  9:26 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote:
(Mar. 29, 2021  7:35 PM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: Anybody got any good plots for Amane’s Apocalypse part 2.

Choco Milk Supply is low and a war breaks out for it

Sounds like something from a Kirby game.
wassa Kirby game?