BB-91 Ray Gil 100RSF Draft: Finished at Last!

The Gil and Overall descriptions look good, but please use the Ray description from the Ray Unicorno D125CS article when you post this. Thanks! Smile
"On one side features the bone of a"

Change it to "One side features" or "On one side Gil features" or something to that effect.

"affording it a firm, defensive grip"

Affording may not be the best choice of word, though I am not completely sure.
Thanks guys, edited.


for your second correction, I copied the RSF section from the Blitz Unicorno article, so it seems to be ok.

EDIT: It's uploaded now!

(Nov. 26, 2010  6:28 PM)Ray Joker Wrote: IMPORTANT: Mold Variations
RSF has two Mold variations. The RSF's included in Random Booster Vol.7 Beat Lynx, specifically with the Bey Tornado Horuseus 130RSF. This mold appears to be made of a softer rubber, and thereby behaves more aggressively than other molds. This should be taken into consideration when choosing a method of obtaining an RSF. The RSF included with Blitz Unicorno 100RSF is of the harder rubber variant.

Hey, just wanted to make a suggestion, Ray Joker. We know that this is a Ray Gil article, right ? I feel that mentioning which mold of RSF comes with Blitz Unicorno in this article doesnt make much sense. Instead, you can make it like this -
".... The RSF included with Ray Gil is of the harder/softer rubber variant."
Such small changes might not be so important, so please tell me if this is spam or something
shirish Shukla- Usually, only the Overall section deals with a bey as a whole. The description of parts is independent of the whole article, and may/may not include Mold Variations. If you noticed, every bey which shares a similar bottom/track uses the same details. Hence, each part description is individual, and on a general basis.
So, including Mold Variations is important actually. The Part Description deals with just RSF, not Ray Gil's RSF. So, everything in relation to RSF which is worth the mention, must be added. Then again, it'll be Kei's decision at the end...
Janstarblast Thanks for telling me all that... Perhaps I need to learn a few more things about the "Art of writing drafts" before I even think of writing a draft myself Smile
Well, first, I'm not completely sure which variant of RSF Ray Gil contains.

But I think people should be more aimed towards Blitz Unicorno, anyways.