[story] Legend of the Bleeding Bey's. (chapter 12 is up!)

Poll: how was the story?

Good
57.14%
8
Medium
42.86%
6
Bad
0%
0
Total: 100% 14 vote(s)
Chapter 5:
A few grammar and spelling mistakes, but I really like the story. SO STINKIN' EPIC! This may be one of the best stories on the WBO.
Definately not the best, Wink Wink, but thanks!
(Sep. 19, 2012  11:39 PM)Eternal-E Wrote: Definately not the best, Wink Wink, but thanks!
Actually it is very good, but people think it isn't as good as it really is because of the somewhat-frequent grammar and spelling mistakes and the wierdish title, but it is actually really good compared to some other people's stories on this website. But the plot is totally awesome! *No wink this time*
(Sep. 19, 2012  11:45 PM)Akio314 Wrote:
(Sep. 19, 2012  11:39 PM)Eternal-E Wrote: Definately not the best, Wink Wink, but thanks!
Actually it is very good, but people think it isn't as good as it really is because of the somewhat-frequent grammar and spelling mistakes and the wierdish title, but it is actually really good compared to some other people's stories on this website. But the plot is totally awesome! *No wink this time*

That reminds me! I've been meaning to take the "the" out of the title. Also, I've just said "the" three times in the same scentense. Two the's that last time. One... Let it rip!
I get it im older in real life actually im 13 so i get it now i didn't know your real age
(Sep. 27, 2012  4:22 PM)bladeshredder Wrote: I get it im older in real life actually im 13 so i get it now i didn't know your real age

wait a second... what?
good story and nice title! i like chapter 5 the most!
why chapter 5?
Chapter 6 is up! (Click to View)
(Sep. 29, 2012  3:41 AM)Eternal-E Wrote: why chapter 5?
Chapter 6 is up! (Click to View)

i dont know i just like 5
Chapter 7 is up.: (Click to View)
No offense, but your chapters are too short, aim for about 600 words for one chapter.
epic bro your going through these pages faster than the weakest bey vs. the strongest bey
[/size][size=xx-large] awsome story so far XD
dude when is chapter 8 im about to pop its so good no AWSOME XD
Chapter 8 is up. I'll change the title when I get home.
(Sep. 04, 2012  12:49 AM)Eternal-E Wrote: I luckily used my awesome skills
Uhm...eh...

So, a few misspellings here and there (I think I saw "seemed" as "seamed," and some awkward wordings). Try rereading your story and fixing anything that doesn't agree with autocorrect (Or Microsoft Word) and the basic sentence grammar rules. If you have any questions or uncertainties, please feel free to shoot me a PM! Smile

Also, the transition from the character looking at the poster to suddenly being in the stadium threw me off. Try to add a little bit of meat in there and add him walking in or something. Otherwise, the science thing held a lot of weight; using a vacuum was pretty smart Smile

Good job.


Just finished Chapter 9! Let's read it you guys! Also I'm taking a break from this story to write the next few chapters in my other story, I will continue this in about a month.
I think you fixed it and sorry for a late post
the sentence that says i "promise i will make you a better blader" you spelled it "aa better blader"
Chapter 10 is up!
Sorry for the double post but...

Chapter 11 is complete!!!