[Fan Fiction]  Beyblade burst apocalypse(15+) (part 7 ongoing)

My longest fanfic ever(besides my um yugioh fanfic) sadly must be put at its end because her creator is retiring her love for beyblade. Sorry everyone.
I am trans and bisexual
We back!
Part 7 chapter 2 Return MAIDEN!
It was dark and barely any sun. I heard a voice break through the darkness. "Haise Haise!" Shun exclaimed. Haise snapped back into her senses. "Sorry shun I most of dozed off." Haise said in a unsettled tone. Haise continuous checks her body and moved her hands weirdly. Then suddenly maiden started to glow red. "Shun battle me one more time!" Haise said as she pointed at shun. "Fine" shun said in a disappointing tone.

3 2 1 go shoot!
Shun:Go nemesis!
Nemesis goes into the center.
Haise:Go Maiden!
Maiden continuous attacks nemesis.
Shun:Useless!
Haise laughs as a aura forms around her.
Shun:What!
Haise laughs as the aura forms around maiden. Haise eyes glow red as the mark of maiden shined black.
Haise:Go MAIDEN! Apocalypse Overflash!
Maiden strikes nemesis then nemesis went flying.
Shun:Useless! Pyro Change!
Nemesis turn into Helios.
Haise: Consume them Maiden!
Maiden strikes Helios continuous.
To be continued

I am back Haise! Me and maiden will destroy everything.
Part 7 chapter 3 shun vs Haise!
Haise: DIE YOU DAMN BRAT!
Maiden attacks Helios quickly.
Shun:What's wrong Haise can't beat a god?
Shun grins.
Haise:What!
Maiden stopped spinning.
Shun:Well this was fun. Bye Haise.
Shun picked up Maiden and left.
Haise: I- I lost.
Haise bit her tongue till it bled.
Later at Shun's house.
Shun:Hey Kisara mind helping me?
Kisara:With what?
Kisara was tall she was 18 and she was white haired. She was pale and she has a flat chest also she wore maid clothes.
Shun:Trying to restart maiden.
Kisara blushes a bit because a shirt less buff guy walks into the room.
Shun: Did you meet my friend?
Kisara did not answer because she was still looking at the guy.
I wanted to make a statement. I am now helping with the writing of this story and am going to try and deliver on these things. I want to get rid of this script format and turn it into a bookish format, next I want to focus more on the Beyblade aspect and much less on the romance aspect (which to be honest is very forced and weird), and finally I want to make characters much more relatable and more 3 dimensional. That’s right I’m going to try and save this fan fic (really hope I can do it).
(Apr. 09, 2021  3:16 AM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: I wanted to make a statement. I am now helping with the writing of this story and am going to try and deliver on these things. I want to get rid of this script format and turn it into a bookish format, next I want to focus more on the Beyblade aspect and much less on the romance aspect (which to be honest is very forced and weird), and finally I want to make characters much more relatable and more 3 dimensional. That’s right I’m going to try and save this fan fic (really hope I can do it).

i believe in you jupiter
Romance is a main part of the story lol. It suppose to be a romance fanfic
(Apr. 09, 2021  3:21 AM)kai edits Wrote: Romance is a main part of the story lol. It suppose to be a romance fanfic

You see that’s where you’re wrong and that’s why people don’t like it. When people come here to read a fan fiction they expect to see some good bey battles not some story that has heavy romantic elements (in other words no one wants to read about a bunch of teenagers having their own individual harem). No offense or anything kai edits, but even the writing is bland (I’ve read he**** better)
(Apr. 09, 2021  3:25 AM)6Jupiter5 Wrote:
(Apr. 09, 2021  3:21 AM)kai edits Wrote: Romance is a main part of the story lol. It suppose to be a romance fanfic

You see that’s where you’re wrong and that’s why people don’t like it. When people come here to read a fan fiction they expect to see some good bey battles not some story that has heavy romantic elements (in other words no one wants to read about a bunch of teenagers having their own individual harem). No offense or anything kai edits, but even the writing is bland (I’ve read he**** better)
You know this was originally a sao fanfic? To be honest I would love to fix up my fanfic but I feel that someone better should write it. 

I get to do voice acting when it comes to that road lol. I want to keep maiden and Emilia just the way they are but you can change her a bit. Maiden needs a upgrade so I am fine when you want to upgrade it.

Btw we can just start all over and start a new timeline.
(Apr. 09, 2021  4:55 AM)kai edits Wrote:
(Apr. 09, 2021  3:25 AM)6Jupiter5 Wrote: You see that’s where you’re wrong and that’s why people don’t like it. When people come here to read a fan fiction they expect to see some good bey battles not some story that has heavy romantic elements (in other words no one wants to read about a bunch of teenagers having their own individual harem). No offense or anything kai edits, but even the writing is bland (I’ve read he**** better)
You know this was originally a sao fanfic? To be honest I would love to fix up my fanfic but I feel that someone better should write it. 

I get to do voice acting when it comes to that road lol. I want to keep maiden and Emilia just the way they are but you can change her a bit. Maiden needs a upgrade so I am fine when you want to upgrade it.

Btw we can just start all over and start a new timeline.

Voice acting? When it comes to that? Please don’t tell me you think this fanfic will blow up and you’ll be getting people trying to get this on TV
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:02 AM)CheetoBlader Wrote:
(Apr. 09, 2021  4:55 AM)kai edits Wrote: You know this was originally a sao fanfic? To be honest I would love to fix up my fanfic but I feel that someone better should write it. 

I get to do voice acting when it comes to that road lol. I want to keep maiden and Emilia just the way they are but you can change her a bit. Maiden needs a upgrade so I am fine when you want to upgrade it.

Btw we can just start all over and start a new timeline.

Voice acting? When it comes to that? Please don’t tell me you think this fanfic will blow up and you’ll be getting people trying to get this on TV
No. I am gonna post it on my yt channel to promote my fanfic
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:05 AM)kai edits Wrote:
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:02 AM)CheetoBlader Wrote: Voice acting? When it comes to that? Please don’t tell me you think this fanfic will blow up and you’ll be getting people trying to get this on TV
No. I am gonna post it on my yt channel to promote my fanfic

Why would you need voice acting though? You just gonna read it?
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:06 AM)CheetoBlader Wrote:
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:05 AM)kai edits Wrote: No. I am gonna post it on my yt channel to promote my fanfic

Why would you need voice acting though? You just gonna read it?
I used to be a great actor in my school so.....
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:06 AM)kai edits Wrote:
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:06 AM)CheetoBlader Wrote: Why would you need voice acting though? You just gonna read it?
I used to be a great actor in my school so.....

Acting and voice acting are very different
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:07 AM)CheetoBlader Wrote:
(Apr. 09, 2021  5:06 AM)kai edits Wrote: I used to be a great actor in my school so.....

Acting and voice acting are very different
I know but I did voice acting too lol
Quitting this fanfic
(Jun. 03, 2021  3:25 AM)kai edits Wrote: Quitting this fanfic

Yare yare daze.
Well, you know what they say, all good things must come to an end.
(Jun. 03, 2021  3:25 AM)kai edits Wrote: Quitting this fanfic

Dude this is like the 8th time you've said that.
(Jun. 03, 2021  10:10 PM)SacredXcalibur Wrote:
(Jun. 03, 2021  3:25 AM)kai edits Wrote: Quitting this fanfic

Dude this is like the 8th time you've said that.

I am actually quitting cause i am writing a romantic horror novel
Working on the new chapter!
(Jun. 05, 2021  7:50 AM)kai edits Wrote: Working on the new chapter!

If you're err... working on another fic and say one is cancelled before posting another chapter on said 'cancelled' series just say the 'cancelled' series is on hiatus.
(Jun. 19, 2021  2:25 PM)Longinox Wrote:
(Jun. 05, 2021  7:50 AM)kai edits Wrote: Working on the new chapter!

If you're err... working on another fic and say one is cancelled before posting another chapter on said 'cancelled' series just say the 'cancelled' series is on hiatus.

I never said i was writing another fanfic. I said i am writing a book lmao. I might just post one more chapter of this garbage fanfic .
(Jun. 05, 2021  7:50 AM)kai edits Wrote: Working on the new chapter!

You just proved my point
Anyone willing to take this torch and keep it alive?

All so I get credit for all use of my characters btw.
Since Kai edits disappeared without any trace her whereabouts were never found. She discovered her love of beyblade and began to work on her secret project maiden. Days passed by while she began to remember her old fanfictions and her friends. Kai edits was never found until one day she came back to her home. With her new found love for beyblade and writing she gained back. She began to rewrite her old fanfic.

(This is the real/revamped version of my old bad fanfic)

With her disappearance to her world of beyblade I give you!

Chapter 1 Shun kurenai new identify!

It was dark and painful winds howling through the trees near a abandoned house. “Hey valentine turn on power to main system and to my lab.” Yeah that’s me walking into my house after a long painful day at a world championships. My name is Shun kurenai Daughter of shu kurenai, last remaining of the kurenai family after shu disappeared. “Turning on power” valentine respond back. yeah that’s my ai system I been working on since my father died. “Valentine fire up the lab and generate power to the unknown piece of metal into my office. Maiden began to grow in my pocket as it got closer to the unknown piece of metal. “Valentine call Akita”. I began waiting for her to pick up the phone.

Akita:Hey shun what’s up?
Shun:hey Akita the piece of metal you left here for me to check and study began to glow around maiden. Any ideas on what is going on?
Akita:we found the last piece of maiden we can now bring your bey back.
Shun:let’s do it Akita.
Akita:you were always like valt so hyped about everything.
Shun:Huh? It’s not that I like him.
Akita hangs up the phone laughing

Shun:she really pisses me off.
Shun takes maiden out of her pocket and began to combine the metal and maiden.
Shun:it’s working! Hold on maiden I can fix you.

Maiden began to glow as the bey began to evolve.

4 hours later

Maiden: Eda!

Eda:What do you want? I am trying to sleep.

Maiden: Shun kurenai is gone! We are Eda Haise!

Chapter end