Beyblade Story - [Insert Name Here]

As my first story didn't do so good, I made another one.

Chapter 1 : ZERO-G!!??
Chapter 2 : Revizer vs Pegasis
Chapter 3 : The change
Chapter 4 : The big day
Chapter 5 : Gavin's battle
Chapter 6 : The battle of magic and birds
For the future, seeing you will add more chapters. Put them in Spoiler brackets. Other than that, nice start.

EDIT: Just incase Wink
Code:
[spoiler] TEXT HERE LOL [/spoiler]
What if I don't? Haha, just kidding.
(Jul. 05, 2012  11:29 AM)Fantomu Wrote: Haha, just kidding.

You better be Tongue_out_wink
Chapter two is done!

I don't understand why decent stories like these don't get that much attention.
Thanks, Shirayuki.

Anyone have ideas on what I should name this story?
(Jul. 07, 2012  3:22 AM)Fantomu Wrote: Thanks, Shirayuki.

Anyone have ideas on what I should name this story?

No one will be able to do so because there is no plot. Once the plot unfolds, then it will be easier to name your story. Good start! Keep going.
Chapter 3 : The change is done! A bit short, I guess.

Nice chapter three! Since when did Synchrome become illegal though...?

The story should be named "Cut the carp" or " My obsession with Blake". LOL Tongue_out
@Insomniac Uh this is a different world you know? xD

Chapter 4 : The big day Here you go. I'm bored-as today.

Please give feedback, everyone. Smile
Hahaha. Nice Story till now. I should give the name of a blader and his beyblade..
Name of Beyblader: Ali
His Beyblade: Sword Leon H145 WD .. or else Burning Cheetah 125 WD
BattleLion,
I don't think he is accepting character requestsSerious
Yeah, I'm not.
(Jul. 08, 2012  12:15 PM)Fantomu Wrote: I rushed to the toilet and brushed my teeth for 15 seconds.
Hahahaha XD
It sounds like he is using brushing his teeth and using the toilet as a sink. It would sound better as "I rushed to the bathroom" or "washroom".
(Jul. 09, 2012  7:53 AM)Insomniac Wrote:
(Jul. 08, 2012  12:15 PM)Fantomu Wrote: I rushed to the toilet and brushed my teeth for 15 seconds.
Hahahaha XD
It sounds like he is using brushing his teeth and using the toilet as a sink. It would sound better as "I rushed to the bathroom" or "washroom".

I can brush teeth while I shower. Eee K changed it. Wink
15 seconds though...

Recommended minimum is one minute. I'm going to have to talk with Ryan's dentist.
Still better than not brushing his teeth. Well, in Ryan's defense, that Beyblade tournament was very important to him, and he didn't want to be late.
(Jul. 09, 2012  10:02 AM)Fantomu Wrote: Still better than not brushing his teeth. Well, in Ryan's defense, that Beyblade tournament was very important to him, and he didn't want to be late.

Since this is a spinning-top forum, I have no choice but to agree. Because if I decide to say personal hygiene comes before Beyblades... I will be attacked XD
Personal hygiene comes before Beyblades. Attack me.
(Jul. 09, 2012  10:08 AM)Fantomu Wrote: Personal hygiene comes before Beyblades. Attack me.

LOL, I guess we're in this together XD
ATTACK US!

Eeurgh, this is getting off-topic, so I'm gonna leave it at that.
I apologize for the short chapter.
Chapter 5 : Gavin's battle
Any feedback, guys (and gals)?
Chapter 6 : The battle of magic and birds
I had no idea what I was thinking when I named the chapter.
Again, any feedback everyone?