[Beyblade Story] Heroes Ambition - (Ch. 2 Up!)

Poll: Do you like the story?

Yes
85.71%
6
No
14.29%
1
Total: 100% 7 vote(s)
Chapter 2 is up!

Chapter 1 - The trap
Chapter 2 - An unexpected ally
This is great so far! I only saw one grammar error, which was "I found that is already open." You probably meant to say "it", but I'm just pointing it out for you. Again, great start!
Its pretty good, I guess. The chapter was a bit short, and confusing though.
Thanks! I changed that error (my laptop made). Also, the first chapter was meant to be confusing. Everything will be clearer in the second chapter.
Eh. Confusing and short...
You need to introduce your character more.
And it's really short, considering all the details.
Like, one paragraph.
Also, centering it makes it hard to read. (My dyslexia... Neyh.)
Work on that.
Otherwise, good luck on that.
I recommend you to add a bit more length to your chapters. If you combined the first two chapters, it would be at least a decent length...

Good use of descriptive words, but some sentences were a bit; how should I put it; long.
Some had too long of a description in one sentence. I would make them into more than one sentence, maybe two, at least.

The current plot is fine, though. Good job!
Kinda short, and it's too clumped. Spacing not only helps reading it, but it makes your story look longer, so do that...