World Beyblade Organization by Fighting Spirits Inc. Off-Topic Forums Your Creations

Battle Strikers - The Story!

Poll: Do You Like The Story?

Yeah, it's great!
70.00%
14
Meh.
30.00%
6
Nope, it's horrible!
0%
0
Total: 100% 20 vote(s)
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Apr. 22, 2011  11:16 PM
 
(Apr. 22, 2011  11:02 PM)Kavasiki Wrote: I must say that it is not possible to give negativ feedback here, seriously.
It is nice to see something a little more original than Beyblade even though it is a little like Beyblade. You are able to make the story feel non-Beybladeish if you catch my drift.

You have been able to make it possible to follow the text too, I'm not getting lost or skip sentences so thumbs up for that. If you are planing to keep these chapters long, try to add them on the first page (kinda what I did) so it is so much easier to find the chapters.

Woah, thanks! Thanks a bunch, dude!

It really means alot, especially coming from the person who wrote God's Pawn, which is pretty much the best story around here xD

Well i'm glad you like it, and thanks for that tip! I'll put the chapters in the first post right away!
Apr. 26, 2011  10:21 PM
 
(Apr. 22, 2011  9:59 PM)TheBlayder Wrote: wow, loved chapter 3, keep it up.

Thanks, Chapter 4 is coming this Sunday Joyful_3

And here's a small glimpse:

“What the?!” Nick tried to follow the striker’s movements, but it had risen so high that it aligned with the sun, blinding Nick as he looked at it. “UGH!” He covered his eyes.
“Heh, just as planned.” With a smile he pulled down his controlling hand. Dark blue sparks sizzled from Blitz as it came crashing down into the mid-air Piranha, slamming it dead in its tracks and forcing it into the ground.
“GAH!” Nick felt his hand being pulled down with immense force as he managed to look into the battlefield. Despite a scorching feeling in his right eye and despite being half blind still, he could see enough to realize he was in trouble!


OH and sorry for the double post, but i wanted to bump the thread as well. Hope i don't get a warning or something <,< >.>
Apr. 26, 2011  11:37 PM
 
Chapter 3 was AWESOME!!

I can imagine Blitz doing something like a storm attack.
Apr. 27, 2011  12:30 PM
 
I cant wait for chapter 4 its really good especially chapter 3
Apr. 27, 2011  12:30 PM
 
I cant wait for chapter 4 its really good especially chapter 3
Apr. 27, 2011  9:05 PM
 
(Apr. 27, 2011  12:30 PM)Xyo Wrote: I cant wait for chapter 4 its really good especially chapter 3

Thanks man, really appreciate it Joyful_3

Oh and btw, You should probably delete the 2nd post since it's just a double post by accident.
Apr. 27, 2011  9:23 PM
 
im not a battle striker fan but i decided to read one of these anyway, these are actually very good. Well i've only read the first chapter but still, it's a very good story.

"pounding with each passed second" "passed" should be replaced with passing so it would be "pounding with each passing second" or you could swap passed and second around so it would be "pounding with each second passed"

There more similar to this so a little re-read should do the story some more good.
Apr. 27, 2011  10:17 PM
 
(Apr. 27, 2011  9:23 PM)drybones41 Wrote: im not a battle striker fan but i decided to read one of these anyway, these are actually very good. Well i've only read the first chapter but still, it's a very good story.

"pounding with each passed second" "passed" should be replaced with passing so it would be "pounding with each passing second" or you could swap passed and second around so it would be "pounding with each second passed"

There more similar to this so a little re-read should do the story some more good.

Wow, thanks for the pointers Joyful_3 And i'm glad you like it! I'll make sure to go through the chapters again and fix those little things Grin
Apr. 29, 2011  2:43 PM
 
Hm, guess i'm doomed to forever double-post the new chapters. And posting it now as well since i won't be here on Sunday xD(1st of May), and i figured since i started posting on Fridays...it's the new official new chapter day.

So here it is, chapter 4:

…“Well? Let’s do this!” He took out his striker, the dark-blue Blitz.
“Oh I can’t wait!” Nick admitted as he put on the controller Rurik gave him and prepared for battle. They were now roughly 15 meters away from each other.
“Ready?!” the black-eyed guy yelled.
“Set!”
“Strike!”…


Chapter 4: Blitzkrieg


“Strike!” Nick reminisced of his past battle with Rurik as he took a running start, kicking off for a few steps until he came to a violent stop, punching his arm forwards. And as blue waves spread across the surface of Piranha’s spinning tip, it shot off forwards, diving through the air as if it was a sea.
“Heh, right into my trap!” In his devious mind this black-eyed schemer had already formulated the blue striker’s demise. He began revving his launcher with a dark shine in his look. “Strike!” Instead of launching his Striker, he moved his arm downwards whilst spinning to the left. As he began turning in a circle he raised his arm with a dazzling speed. Almost in an instant, he had moved his arm from close to the ground to a point far above his head. The upwards momentum launched Blitz like a shuttle, sending it flying high into the air.

“What the?!” Nick tried to follow the striker’s movements, but it had risen so high that it aligned with the sun, blinding Nick as he looked at it. “UGH!” He covered his eyes.
“Heh, just as planned.” With a smile he pulled down his controlling hand. Dark blue sparks sizzled from Blitz as it came crashing down into the mid-air Piranha, slamming it dead in its tracks and forcing it into the ground.
“GAH!” Nick felt his hand being pulled down with immense force as he managed to look into the battlefield. Despite a scorching feeling in his right eye and despite being half blind still, he could see enough to realize he was in trouble!

“Damn you!” He cursed as he raised his hand violently despite the downwards force, tightening up every muscle in his arm. Soon the dark blue sparks were overwhelmed by a light blue wave and Blitz was propelled back into the air by Piranha’s force. Nick pulled his arm to the left, sending Piranha climbing up the steel frame of an unfinished building. His blue striker was racing fast, trying to catch up to Blitz and get revenge. Seeing the opposing Striker helpless in the air Nick folded his hand into a fist, pulling it back and punching a moment later. Another wave of energy came out as two sets of razor sharp jaws appeared. Soon a giant metallic Piranha, the size of two cars, was into the air. The piranha shrieked as it neared its pray.

“Heh…”
A push of a button! Soon a steel wrecking ball came crashing down into Piranha. Forcing it back down to the ground, the Striker was clenched under the ball, with Blitz landing on top of it, victorious.
“No…no!” Nick could no longer feel the connection between his striker and him. It could mean only one thin… that he had lost. “GOD DAMN YOU!” He raced over to the wrecking ball, pushing it away with all his force. Yet despite his desperate attempt of rescuing the blue Piranha, he couldn’t even budge it.

“One win for me.” The other guy revealed a remote of sorts, calling back his Striker as he pressed a red button. The wrecking ball began rising. Not even waiting for it to be out of the way, Nick dreadfully pushed it away as he tried to see if his striker was still in one piece. Fearing for it he tried to feel if there was anything on the ground. A shred of hope filled his eyes as he grabbed hold of a small metallic object, clearly recognizing its shape and texture. He pulled back his arm, looking at it.
“Thank god!” Luckily, Piranha was still in one piece, and aside from minor scratch marks, it had no other damage. “YOU!” He ran to the person responsible for this. Overfilled with rage he grabbed onto the guy’s jacket. “You CHEATER!” He yelled, pushing the guy backwards.

“Hey!” He pushed back, regaining his stance with ease as now both were griping onto each other. “All is fair in a battle!” He pushed back even more, causing Nick to lose his grip on him. “Besides, it ain’t my fault you…UGH!” He was interrupted by a fiery punch in the face that sent him to the ground. He hit the dirt as his beanie fell off to one direction and his launcher to another. “Son of a…” He kicked off the ground, launching himself at Nick and punching himself in the left cheek.
“You dumbass! You have nobody else to blame but yourself!”

Nick wanted to say something. He wanted to object so badly. But he couldn’t. The stranger was right. He had been too careless. He was so angry at this black-eyed devil before him, but even more so at himself. He wanted to get back up on his feet and start throwing punches, but he knew he had to find another way. And the only other way for revenge was….

“Fine!” He got up on his feet and walked back to where he had dropped his launcher after the wrecking ball fell. It pained him to think back to it for some reason. Perhaps he was attached to his Striker a little too much. He picked it up and slowly, with shivering fingers, attached Piranha to it. “Come on you carp! COME ON!” He activated his launcher.

“Fine then.” He walked to his beanie and picked it, brushing it off with his hand and then firmly placing it back on his head. Only after did he take the launcher as well, shaking it slightly and attaching his Striker to it. “Ready?”
“Shut it!” In a violent swing he launched his Striker, aiming not for Blitz but rather for the HEAD of his enemy.
Undisturbed, he simply raised the launcher and turned it 90 degrees. Now the blue beast was in a head to head collision with Blitz.

“Humph! Respect, kid!” He couldn’t understand Nick’s hatred, but he still respected his resolve to do something about it. “Now let’s bring it down!” He forced his hand forwards and in a blast he pushed Piranha back. He then slid his arm to the right, sending his striker flying to a nearby building. The striker dashed onto the metal construction, heading for Piranha, but Nick didn’t wait a moment more. He sent the blue striker soaring towards the same metal construction as it landed a few meters away from Blitz. Accelerating at each other they clashed with full power, indenting the metal deeply at the place of impact.
“Come on kid. That all your hatred got?!” He shouted as dark blue sparks shot off from his striker as it kicked off, shooting towards the opposite building.

“I SAID SHUT UP!” He couldn’t keep it inside anymore. In a cry of rage his Piranha buzzed as it spun in place, waiting to attack. And then it happened! It shot off, creating a large burnout hole in the place it stood just a second ago. Blue energy engulfed it as an explosion of power summoned the Deep Blue Beast!
“It ain’t happening kid.” His black eyes gazed as a wide grin appeared on his face. Thunderous bolts sprouted from Blitz as it propelled and then a dark, blue monster in the shape of a human appeared, with sparkling yellow blips all over its body. It shrieked as it struck Piranha and Piranha struck IT! They collided in an ominous shriek of metal clashing. The high-pitched sound echoed as an explosion engulfed them both.

Each was sent flying back…and all according to plan!
“Heh.” He took out a smaller remote with only a flip switch on it and pulled the lever. As Piranha was flying back from behind it came out a steel beam, tied to a long cable. It aimed to smash into the Striker as it was heading for it face-first.

This time Nick smiled as well, because this time he saw it coming. This time he knew what to do! With a twist of his palm the blue Striker turned around itself, landing on the beam tip-first and then propelling from it! As it went back at Blitz, the beam spun around, still connected to the cable. As Piranha smashed into Blitz, the beam had gone spinning into a circular trajectory and now it was approaching both Strikers from the side.
“Damnit!” His smirk turned into a frown as he struggled to not let his Striker get smashed to bits. He pushed with his controller, and Blitz came back into Piranha, hitting it low and raising it above the level of the beam, whilst the navy-blue striker itself landed on the steel beam, near the upper edge. From the force of the landing, the beam turned and instead of its side, Blitz was on the top surface now.

“Now’s the chance!” Nick lowered his palm as Piranha landed on the other side of the beam. Then he tightened his arm and shouted:
“EAT HIM UP!” Piranha glowed blue and so did Blitz. Light vs Dark, the time to clash was now. Concentrated energy sped up both Strikers as they shot off at each other. Each hit the other off-center, slightly above the beam.

In a blast, concentrated air pressure shot off from the sides like a shotgun as the beam spun around its centre. Landing back on it Piranha began pushing Blitz back. The jet-haired guy growled in anger. The blue predator pulled back and rushed again, and again! It pounded Blitz as both were spinning along with the beam. Inch by inch it forced it towards the edge! It was clear who was winning. But giving up wasn’t an option.

“Damn you!” He took out a small knife with his free hand, throwing it to the left. The knife soared through the air as he hit a rope tied to a bolt on the wall, cutting it. Rope tightened as another beam just like the one before, was headed…only not towards Piranha, but rather Nick. From behind it, tied to a high pole swung a long beam that aimed to crush his back if it hit the unaware Nick. It cut through the air as the vibrating sound of the tight cable buzzed in his ears. He turned around and…
“Nick!!!”

“Ugh…”He opened his eyes to see the body Brendon above him. His friend had pushed him out of harm’s way, just in time. “What the…Brendon?!” He wanted to thank him, but pain in his arm directed his attention elsewhere. He felt his arm pushed into the ground as he saw Blitz pounding his Striker into a wall. It hit from all sides and Piranha began to slow down.

“Damn you!” He jumped to his feet, angrier than ever! And just as Blitz struck for another time, he tightened his arm, focused on Piranha. The blue beast spun around faster than, repelling Blitz backwards as it shot off. A pair of jaws roared as the Piranha took the final bite! In a blur it went through Blitz, and a motionless navy-blue striker fell to the ground, only a meter away from its owner. Still spinning Piranha landed behind that cheater, that filthy carp that reached for Nick’s life!

He wanted to pull back his arm so bad, to send his striker piercing through the black-haired one’s back, through his heart! And he did it, but only in his mind. A simple thought stopped him from doing so in real life. And that thought was…”The battle isn’t over!” And in truth, it wasn’t. The battle was a two-out-of-three type of match, and he was one last round away from victory! But first…

“Rocky?!” He turned around as he slid his hand in a circular motion, guiding Piranha around and into his hand.
“I…I didn’t know what to do! But…but I...I thought you were in trouble!” Stuttering, he slowly spoke. He had arrived when the second battle had started, before which he had argued with himself whether to go to school or follow Nick. A tough decision…a life-changing decision! He couldn’t believe his eyes! He couldn’t believe his mind! He had seen something that seemed physically impossible!

Nick kept silent for a moment, realizing what Brendon had just seen. He knew he had to tell him, but didn’t know how. Only words he could say were:
“Thanks, Brendon.” He looked down at the Striker in his hand, and at his launcher in the other. “We need to finish this!” He shouted, turning his head towards his enemy.
Apr. 29, 2011  3:53 PM
 
WOW that was pretty intense.

I wonder what Blitz striker soul looks like?
May. 02, 2011  7:41 PM
 
(Apr. 29, 2011  3:53 PM)Ultimate Wrote: WOW that was pretty intense.

I wonder what Blitz striker soul looks like?

Thanks man, and sorry i haven't replied fast, i wasn't here.

As for Blitz, i try to stay true as much as possible to the drawings on the main website.
May. 06, 2011  11:14 AM
 
Well....just as i thought, this kind of story isn't very popular around here. Ah well....here's one last chapter for ya, and then I'm giving up on it Tongue_out


Nick kept silent for a moment, realizing what Brendon had just seen. He knew he had to tell him, but didn’t know how. Only words he could say were:
“Thanks, Brendon.” He looked down at the Striker in his hand, and at his launcher in the other. “We need to finish this!” He shouted, turning his head towards his enemy.



Chapter 5: A Trickster faded


“Heh…” He smiled. “You wanna do this?” He picked up his striker. “Come on then, if you dare!” With his dark smile the black-eyed teenager ran to the ladder, climbing upon the bare building which was only halfway through construction. Soon he found himself on top of a metal platform, facing the opposite building and standing at least 10 meters above the ground. He gestured towards it, inviting Nick to climb on it just as he had.

“Nick, what are you going to do?” Frightened, Brendon asked his friend, pleading him not to go there with his desperate gaze
“Heck, I’ve got to do this!”
“But, it’s just going to be another trap!”
“I know. But like I said…I’ve got to do this, Rocky!” With a fearless shine in his eyes he dashed off, leaving one word echoing in Brendon’s head….”Rocky”…
A nickname Nick had given him, since the day they met. He remembered it clear as daylight, the distant afternoon of nearly a decade ago. They were kids, and Nick had just moved in next door. Curios as he was, Nick wondered off as his parents moved the boxes into their new home. And as curios as he was as well, Brendon followed Nick. One after another they walked through the neighborhood’s streets. And then something happened that would forge their friendship.

“Look at him, little baby wondering off!” 2 years older, bullies began picking on Nick.
“Shut up! I’m not a baby!” Infuriated, Nick was quick to reply.
“Hey, look at him! Who do you think you are?” Another one of the bullies said, pushing him back.
“I’m Nick! And I don’t care who you are!” Pushing them away, Nick walked past them. But if only that was the end of them. Pulling him back by shirt white shirt, one of the bullies punched him.

And all the while the even smaller Brendon watched from behind a nearby car, afraid to do anything. As small as he was, what could he do? But then it came to him…
“Are you gonna cry?!” The bully said as he pulled onto Nick’s hair.
“Shut….up!” Nick struggled to keep back tears.
“Aw…little cryba...OUCH!” A small stone had hit him in the head. A stone coming from a familiar nearby car. Seconds later an array of pebbles and small rocks came falling onto the group of kids, scaring them off, all the while only a single shiny pebble hit Nick on the head.

“Ouch!” He ran towards the car, finding Brendon crying as he held onto a few stones. “Rocks? Did you throw them?”
Wiping his tears with his sleeve, Brendon wanted to greet this new boy and say his name, but for some reason he could only nod. Probably all the fear that gathered inside of him rendered him speechless.
“Thanks!” With a smile, Nick replied. “I’m Nick by the way.” He extended his arm. “What’s your name?”

Yet again, Brendon wanted to say his name but couldn’t.
“What’s wrong? You can’t speak?” Nick arched his head in surprise. “I think I’ll call you…” He looked at the stones on the ground. “Rocky! That’s it! I’ll call you Rocky.”

Rocky…He flashed back to reality, hearing it again.
“Rocky!” Nick shouted from atop the platform, calling out to his friend. “Aren’t you gonna climb up too?!”
He thought about for a moment, and then began running towards a nearby building, dragging his schoolbag behind him. It took him quite a while before he made it to a platform, although his was a bit higher up than Nick’s and the other guy’s. It was a building next to the one his friend was on. He chose it because he wanted to be closer to Nick than this new, deceitful person.

“Finally! Want to start now?!”
“Oh I’m sorry.” Nick replied. “I figured you’d drop a stadium from the skies, so I was waiting for THAT.” He jested.
“Funny…”He smiled, rubbing his nose. “But that’s not what I had in mind.” He then took a few steps back, approaching a lever on the wall. “I was thinking something a little…” He pulled it as a whole cluster of metal beams came down, tied with cables, just like before. They hung from a large crane that was between the buildings. With them on the same level as the battlers, the beams created a long, moving maze that could hardly be perceived as a valid surface for a Strikers’ battle.

“Ready?!” Nick attached Piranha to his launcher, starting it.
“Wait!” Brendon shouted, waving his hands.
“Now what?” Annoyed, the black-eyed guy looked at Brendon.
“I want to do this!” With a brave smile he held up his arms in the hair.
“Fine…” He walked back to the edge of his platform, attaching Blitz to his launcher.
“Ready?!” Brendon shouted as both battlers took a steady pose, with a slight nod confirming this.
“Set!” Nick took a step back, while his opponent did the same. Blitz sparked in dark blue as Piranha was engulfed in light waves of energy, almost teal.
“Strike!!” He dropped down his arms, and then the final battle began!

The strikers surged with energy as both battlers launched them. Buzzing as they spun, each striker landed on a different beam, sliding swiftly across it. With a force of a wrecking ball they kicked off the beams, sending them in perpetual turns as they flew into each other. Both StrikerSouls appeared in a battlecry, slamming into each other. At the aftermath of the clash, both were kicked back, landing on yet another set of beams and roaming around, readying for the next attack.
“Come on! I gotta win this!” His red hot heart under those black robes pounded like a tank! Then he saw it! With a twitch in his eye he commanded his dark blue striker to soar into the sky, slashing through a cable that held a beam in place on the far side of this improvised battle ground, away from Piranha. But in a strange chain reaction, the beam that Nick’s striker was rushing on came plummeting down almost immediately after the one Blitz had cut through.

“I knew he was gonna do something like this! But how did he do it?! DAMNIT! I can’t think about that right now!!” Nick was struggling to find a way to get Piranha back into the battle. If that beam had fallen with Piranha on it, this fight would have found its end. But as he tried not to give up, he caught a glimpse of his opponent’s victorious snickering.
“Thinking you’ve won?!” He clenched his hand into a fist, angry. Seconds away from defeat, Piranha began surging with energy, ever-increasing its speed as it spun immobile! It sped up to a point that it almost melted the metal underneath and just as Nick cried out:
“IT AIN’T THAT EASY!!!”
His striker rocketed upwards, like a true blue piranha diving to the surface, biting into its prey!

The beast roared as its bite cut through a beam, arriving to face Blitz.
Still rotating faster than ever Piranha landed on a beam before shooting forwards like a cannon blast.
“carp! Gotta think fast!” In the last second Blitz had moved out of the way, its speed to its advantage. But he didn’t wait for another attack. With a jolt he pulled back his arm, sending Blitz thundering towards the enemy. But Nick did the same, waiting for just the right moment, and then extending his arm further, sending Piranha away from Blitz.

“Huh? That’s…” Brendon thought back to their short-lasting “battle”, and even wondered how he could even call it with such a powerful word after witnessing this astonishing display of power. “NOW NICK!” He shouted, trying to aid his friend.
“Heh, guess he caught me!” Nick smirked as he pulled back his arm hastily, slamming Piranha into Blitz. Two condensed blue energies smashed as Blitz got sent flying backwards in a spinning momentum with Piranha chasing after him.

“Grrr…that brat!” He growled as he looked up. Frown turned to smile as he directed his Striker to the right, cutting through another cable. But this time a beam, lower than the rest came rising up, slamming into Piranha.
“How the hell…!” A slight surging pain struck Nick’s arm as Piranha was slammed from the bottom. Agitated he looked around to see any levers and switches, any way he was doing it…

“Nick! Up there!” He turned to see his friend point upwards, where the crane held the cables that secured the beams. He focused, and upon close inspection noticed the gimmick. Instead of a separate cable for every beam, two and sometimes three beams were connected in one cable, intertwined in the top. Almost impossible to notice as he thought.
“So that’s how he does it, huh?!” He then lifted his hand even higher, sending Piranha flying towards the Crane. As it landed upside down, in a split second he decided to cut all of those cables. “But…heck, I’m not like him!” With a resolve not to use any trickery, he slammed his hand downwards hard, as Piranha came diving into Blitz.

“Heh, gotcha!” He sent Blitz blazing around the battlefield at insane speeds, releasing specific beams. The sound of cables tightening and beams plummeting filled the area as at least a dozen beams went flying at Piranha.
“NO CHANCE!” Every fiber of Nick’s body screamed as his StrikerSoul appeared in the form of the piranha he knew so well. Diving down the striker chewed his way through each beam, one after another.
“Of course not…It’s just to wear you out…” As Piranha made its way towards Blitz, the dark blue striker surged with blue sparks, spinning more and more rapidly. As the last beam was devoured, a dark blue human jolted upwards, going as fast as lightning at Piranha.

They crashed again! And again! Up went Piranha, down went Blitz. They crashed ever so powerfully! And then they clashed for one last time, slamming each other off center, propelling to the side. Heading past their owners, the strikers surged through the building. A short glimpse preceded a deadly lock between locks, as each battler directed his anger and controller at the enemy.

And from behind them, two deafening roars marked the arrival of the deadly Souls. They boomed their exit of the buildings as they headed into a collision. But then something stopped them. A benevolent purple fog interrupted them, along with the sound of a chopper’s propellers spinning and a megaphone through which spoke the person that started it all.

“Stop this battle at once! This is not an official tournament battle!”
They looked up only to see Rurik, hanging from a helicopter and speaking at them. His hair wavered in the gust of air that came from the spinning, and a very serious look befell his face.
“Get down on the ground, and take your strikers with you!” With a flinch of a wrist, he sent both strikers flying to their owners with his purple Sentinel. They grabbed them and rushed to the ground as Rurik landed with his helicopter.

“You!” As soon the helicopter stopped spinning its propellers, Rurik stepped out and approached the battlers, all three in shock and awe of his appearance. He walked up to the black-eyed guy, with an emotionless expression. And still with no emotion shown, he punched him right in the cheek, sending him to the ground.
“I already warned you! You were banned from the tournament!” Crouching, he violently took his card, ripping it in half. “And you stoop as low as to steal another license?! Pig!” He threw the two pieces to the dirt as the guy got up.

“Heck, what is all this?!” Nick looked at Rurik.
“Nick, I deeply apologize! Recently this cunning weasel was banned from the tournament for using prohibited tools in battles. I am sure you have witnessed such things in your battle just now?”
“Umm, yeah but...I thought anything was allowed.”
“Anything IS allowed, as long as it hasn’t been pre-prepared. Cutting through a boulder to make for a projectile, opening a nearby pipe to send a blast of water. Environmental attacks and they are not forbidden. But if one would go as low as to pre-arrange his battling environment, now that is an entirely different story.” He fixed up his hair and dusted his clothes off.

“So if he was banned, how did he have that card thingy?!” Brendon interrupted, much to Rurik’s surprise, even if it did not show on his face.
“Hmm, I see you were careless enough to let someone who’s not in the tournament to follow you. But since we’re talking…” He approached Brendon. “I took immediate actions to deactivate his license after finding out about his rule-breaking and chased after him to retrieve the controller. However he was fast enough to escape me and to even find an unlucky battler from whom he stole this license, through trickery no doubt.”

“Yeah well, you can’t keep me from a good battle!” He smirked.
“Good battle? You use devices and traps instead of giving your all!” Angrily, Nick replied to him.
“Whatever, I still would’ve won if it wasn’t for little miss sunshine here!” Untouched by this statement he spoke, referring to Rurik’s golden hair.
“Won?! You still don’t get it do you?!” Nick pushed him. “The time you push that button, the second you sent that wrecking ball down, the one moment you stop relying on your skill, you’ve already lost! You don’t win fights at the end! You win them in the heat of battle!! You win them when you give it your best shot and know you did what you could! And even if you lose, at least you lose with pride.” Turning away, he walked off with teary eyes.

“Come on Rocky, we’re late for class.” He started walking with his launcher and striker in hand and Brendon following close.
“Wait!” Running, he grabbed Nick’s shoulder. “carp! Just wait a minute!” Nick turned around to see those black eyes sharper than ever. “ You ain't going nowhere!” He said in an angry tone.

“I want a rematch! And back in the tournament!” He turned to Rurik. “Do it!” He ran to Rurik, grabbing onto his clothes “You! Get me back in the tournament!”
“No!” Cold as ice, Rurik cut him off.
“Rurik, just give him a chance. I’ll battle him for it!”
“YOU HEARD HIM!” Without looking away, Jordan quickly pointed at Nick. “My Striker versus his, for a place in the tournament.” A devilish smile spread across his face. “My strength! My skill.”

“Idiots…” Rurik couldn’t help but shake his head in disagreement. But, he knew there was only one way to solve this without getting himself into a battle. “But, fine. Only if he wins.”
“My way, boy!” Calmly he spoke. He simply let go of Rurik and walked to his launcher, grabbing it. Both him and Nick said no words, but they knew what the other was feeling. It was passion for a battle, burning desire to give it your all. When they positioned themselves, Rurik invited Brendon to join him in the hellicopter. They rose up in the sky in noise, as Brendon was handed a megaphone.

“Ready?!” He shouted, waiting for the battlers' confirmation.
“Set!” He spoke after catching a short glimpse of their battle-hungry eyes.
“STRIKE!”…


------Later that day----
Three boys walked in the sunset. A tall one, a dark one and a very short one…
“Yeah! I told ya I could do it!” He smiled happily, showing off his license with the initials “J.T.” written on it.
“Yes. I suppose you did earn it. After all, it only took you 7 rematches!” Nick grinned, tapping him on the back.
“Yes, I guess he did earn it.” Slightly sad, Brendon replied.
“Eh? What’s the matter Rocky?”
“Nothing. It’s just…I thought I could get a chance to enter the tournament as well.”
“Yeah well you heard Rurik. He had no more controllers available.”
“I know.” He looked down. “…I know…”

“Relax little guy!” He tapped him on the head. “I’ll let you use mine! After all, it’s the least I could do!” He smiled.
“You will?!” With his face lighting up, Brendon looked at the big black eyes that were above him. “But umm…It’s…” He looked around as the sun was going down. “It’s a little dark, and…”
“And you have to go home, right?” Nick budged in.
“Hah! Guess I’ll be heading off too. We part ways here!” He said as the three approached a crossroad.
“Alright.” Nick waved as he walked off, but a moment later a shock hit his head as he realized something. “Hey wait!” he shouted.
“Huh?” He turned around, holding onto his beanie with one hand, and his bag with the other.

“It’s been an entire day, and I still don’t know your name!”
“Yeah, I guess you don’t.” He smiled, turning around. “It’s Jordan!” He waved his arm, continuing to walk. “Jordan Teague!” And after crossing the street he turned around again. “And you better remember it, boy!” He shouted out at Nick, pointing and tagging him as a rival in his mind. Nick acknowledged him, just as a bus drove through the street, blocking him from view. When it passed, Jordan was hitching a ride on the very edge of the bus, waving at his two new acquaintances, and even though he didn’t admit it just yet…two new friends…
May. 06, 2011  11:24 AM
 
hey kollosos, it's me deoxys from the late striker axis, i didn't know you were here. is this the same story, ill read it anyway. i haven't seen you since striker axis died.
May. 06, 2011  10:00 PM
 
(May. 06, 2011  11:24 AM)pikabattler Wrote: hey kollosos, it's me deoxys from the late striker axis, i didn't know you were here. is this the same story, ill read it anyway. i haven't seen you since striker axis died.

Yeah, it's nice seeing you too. And you SHOULD reread it, i've changed a few minor stuff, so i think it's even better now Joyful_3
May. 07, 2011  6:11 PM
 
(May. 06, 2011  11:14 AM)kolosos666 Wrote: Well....just as i thought, this kind of story isn't very popular around here. Ah well....here's one last chapter for ya, and then I'm giving up on it Tongue_out

Unhappy It was a pretty good story?

Well I hope everyone gave it a chance.
May. 22, 2011  1:04 PM
 
AWESOME!Please Continue it.It is a good story i really like it.
Jun. 06, 2011  7:13 AM
 
i sort of agree with beyruler123 but otherwise its a great story and Battle Strikers isn't too bad even with is similarities with beyblade...
Jun. 06, 2011  7:25 AM
 
ha, i just found the pic my freind did when we were going to make a comic version of this. i think you should continue on this kollosos.
Jul. 13, 2011  11:33 PM
 
Soooo, i don't know if i should do this, it may be considered necroing a thread but what the hell, since it's the only chapter i haven't posted. Also i wanna apologize to everyone who were reading this and/or Race!On! Because i haven't finished the new chapter. The reason why is because i've been REALLY caught up in making games. Yes, yours truly has entered the world of game-creation as a game designer. On the dark side, no more time for writing. On the bright side, if all goes well, soon you'll get to play a flash game that's VERY reminiscent of Race!On! Wink So you can look forward to that.

Anyways, here's the Last(for now) chapter of my Battle Strikers story! Enjoy Joyful_3

“It’s been an entire day, and I still don’t know your name!”
“Yeah, I guess you don’t.” He smiled, turning around. “It’s Jordan!” He waved his arm, continuing to walk. “Jordan Teague!” And after crossing the street he turned around again. “And you better remember it, boy!” He shouted out at Nick, pointing and tagging him as a rival in his mind. Nick acknowledged him, just as a bus drove through the street, blocking him from view. When it passed, Jordan was hitching a ride on the very edge of the bus, waving at his two new acquaintances, and even though he didn’t admit it just yet…two new friends…

Chapter 6: New guys, theft and other stuff.

…The very next day…
“Oh man, oh man, oh man!!!” Nick rushed through the hallways, racing to get to class on time. He saw the classroom! “There it is! Number 8!” He thought as he saw his classroom. He ran so fast, even rushing past a familiar face without as much as a greeting. “I’m gonna make it! I’m gonna make it! I’m gonna…” But the bell rang. Only few seconds before he opened that door, it rang!

“Ah Mister Rivendale. So glad you could join us.” The teacher looked at him as she opened her book. “Sit down, please.” She said icily as he slowly made his way to his seat next to Brendon.
“I hope you prepared for this, mentally speaking.” Brendon looked up at him as he spoke in his usual voice.
“Ugh!” Chills crawled up his spine as he remembered the last time they skipped school. Writing an entire 1000 word essay on bad behavior in detention, twice! “Don’t remind me!” He took off his bandana, tying it on his arm. After all, hair accessories weren’t allowed, at least on Miss Daisy's class.
“Stop chattering you two! She scolded them. “Now, I’d like to introduce you to a new student who just transferred to our school.” She walked to the door, already open by Nick not long ago. “Mister Teague, would you please join us?”

“Teague?!!” Brendon and Nick looked each other in shock.
“Hello everybody.” Brand new school uniform, clean-cut hair and a sleek schoolbag hanging from his shoulder. They could hardly recognize him, but it was DEFINITIVELY Jordan! Shyly, with a good-guy act he walked into the classroom, standing next to the teacher in front of the chalkboard.
“Students, I’d like you to meet Jordan Teague. He just transferred here.”

“Hello Jordan.” The class greeted unanimously.
“Yes, it’s so great to be here.” He smiled like an innocent boy he never was.
“And we’re thrilled to have a straight “A” student in our class.” She turned to him with a wide smile across her face. “Now if you could just take your seat…” She looked around to find an empty seat and the one right behind Brendon caught her eye. “Right there, in the middle! Behind Brendon, one of our finest students.”

“Awesome!” Nick said to himself as he waited until Jordan walked to his seat before turning around to greet him.
“You transferred here?!”
“Mhm.” Jordan simply nodded, keeping his eyes on the teacher. But as soon as she took her eyes off him, his expression turned into that smug bad boy look Nick and Brendon had met yesterday. “I did.” Even his voice changed. He laid back on his chair; put his hands behind his head and his feet on the desk. “Why do you think I was carrying that large bag yesterday? My mom moved here a few days ago and just yesterday I came as well.” But almost instantaneously he turned back into a perfectly seated position just as the teacher looked at him.

“I trust you have all the books you need?”
“Yes ma’am.” Gently he spoke.
“Alright then.” She put on her glasses as she looked at the class. “Now, before we begin…” Sharply she looked at Nick and Brendon. “Since Mr. Hutchinson and Rivendale were absent yesterday, they’ll be attending detention after hours. Now…” Before she could begin the lecture, she saw Jordan’s hand in the air. “Yes Mr. Teague?”
“Could I please attend the extra classes along with Nick and Brendon?”
“Well there’s no need to. You haven’t done anything wrong.” She sat down as she replied.
“Good to know.” Jordan’s eyes darkened as an evil grin appeared on his face.

Just as the teacher sat down, a leg of the chair broke and she tumbled down to the ground.
Victoriously, Jordan stood up, raising his arms in the air as the crowd of students cheered him on.
“Thank you ladies and gentlemen!” He bowed generously.
“Mister Teague!!!”

…Later that day, in detention…

Nick yawned as he was writing, looking around in boredom. Then he turned to Jordan, whispering so the teacher couldn’t hear him.
“So Jordan, how come you’re a straight “A” student?”
“Eh? I cheated.” He answered casually as if it was nothing.
“WHAT?!” Nick gasped in amazement.
“Yes, well it doesn’t surprise me.” Brendon remarked as he kept on writing his essay, this time a 2500 word essay on writing and the English language.

“Oh, that reminds me.” Jordan pointed his pen at Nick. “After class, I need you to come with me. A bunch of guys want to do a 2 on 2 battle, and i…well, not that I need any help, but pure formality.”
“Sure!” Nick eagerly awaited for the next battle. “But first we have to get out of here.” He looked out the window, and something across the schoolyard caught his attention. It was Rurik, walking down the street, followed not far away by a hooded person with long black hair.
“Hey guys!” He whispered again. “Look, it’s Rurik.”
“Where?” Brendon moved his head around, trying to catch a glimpse.
“Oh, it’s that German guy.” Jordan answered him as the hooded person caught his attention. He seemed to be a teenager as well.
“Actually, he’s Russian. His name and accent are Russian . And furthermore…” Brendon finally pushed Nick to the side, looking at the two just as they disappeared from sight. “Who is that guy behind him?”
“Eh? Probably another contestant in the tournament.”

“Another?” Brendon thought. “Does that mean he has more controllers?! Could it be that he purposely denied me entrance to the tournament?!” He wondered for a while, but decided to let it go. Shortly after, their teacher stood up.
“Well, it’s clear that you haven’t finished the essay yet, and it’s been three hours. So…” She picked up her purse. “I’m letting you go, but I expect a finished essay tomorrow on my desk. And DON’T be late!”
She walked towards the door, just as they packed their bags. But while she was opening it, she looked at Jordan. “As for you…I am VERY disappointed, Mr. Teague!” She then walked off, followed by the three of them.

As soon as they were out of the school, Jordan took out his signature black beanie and put it on his head.
“So, you guys better carry your equipment! I ain’t going anywhere but that alley!” He said in a commanding voice, almost frightening Brendon.
“Ha! I always carry my Piranha and gear!” Nick rubbed his nose, smiling.
“Mhm. Me too!” Brendon nodded. But as he thought about it, he got sad yet again. “But I’ll be of no use to them.” He looked down.

They walked among the tall skyscrapers, through the busy streets. Fifteen minutes later, they approached an alley. Even though they couldn’t see anyone, they could clearly hear the sounds of Strikers battling! As they turned around and entered it, they saw a boy and a girl battling. The girl was definitively their age, but the boy seemed smaller, around 12 years old. Another boy just like him sat on a dumpster, admiring the battle. No doubt his twin. And right next to him laid asleep an older boy, a teenager. The battle ended in a large clash as the boy’s brown striker flew away after a small explosion of power. He had lost to the older girl.

“There they are.” The trio approached the group. Up close they could clearly see what they looked like. The girl was tall, slightly taller than Nick and Jordan, with a short spiky pink hair falling down to her neck and a piercing on her right eyebrow. You could tell the hair was dyed pink, as the roots were black. She had large black eyes and a small nose. She wore a pink, long-sleeved shirt and a white pair of tight jeans and small pink shoes. Despite her overly pink outfit, she had that rebellious punk attitude. Right next to her was the kid she just battled. Wearing loose brown trousers and a squared brown and black t-shirt. Similarly, his twin has blue trousers and a dotted t-shirt with blue and green dots. And both of them had brown eyes and very short blonde hair, spiked upwards.

“You punks ready?!” Overly confident of himself and slightly egotistic, Jordan pointed at the girl. She simply smirked, turned around and walked to the guy asleep on top of the dumpster.
“Hey, Jean! Hey, hey Jean!” She spoke in a French accent as she nudged the guy to wake up. Then suddenly she grabbed his foot and PULLED HIM, throwing him on the ground as he screamed in pain. “WAKE UP YOU carp!” She yelled at him.
“Alright, alright Isa!” He got up, speaking in a French accent as well. He rubbed his head before looking at the trio, who were still in awe from what had just happened, except for Jordan, who was simply smiling. Jean, as the girl called him, has long blue hair that fell down his back. It was dyed as well, as his roots were shown to be black also, and he was the same height as Isa with large black eyes and a small nose. He wore a white t-shirt and blue overalls and additionally, he was wearing a pair of black sneakers.

“So, you got a teammate? Good. Now let’s get this over with so we can have your strikers!” The girl said, much to Nick’s shock.
“Woah! Have our strikers?! You didn’t tell me about this!” Nick looked at Jordan.
“I didn’t?” Jordan acted clueless, but then crossed his arms, holding Blitz in his left hand. “Still, you have to risk something if you want to get something!”
“No way!” He shook his head sideways.
“What’s the matter? Afraid you’ll lose?!” He taunted him.

“Hey are we going to do this or what?!” Annoyed, Isa shouted out to them before Nick could finish arguing. He clenched his teeth, thinking about the situation for a moment. But then he simply smiled and took out Piranha from his pocket.
“Damn, if you ain’t backing down, I ain’t backing down either.”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m…”

“HEY, YOU FRENCH BRATS!” The noise of a pedals turning interrupted them, as a raging black teenager drove in on a bike. He pulled the breaks hard, doing a 180’ spin as he came to a stop.
“carp, it’s Mike!” Isa was clearly afraid of this “Mike” guy. He was quite tall and thin, yet his arms where defined and muscular, despite being abnormally thin. He had a large afro-styled brown hair and wore light-brown sleeveless tank-top, very wide jeans that went down to his knees and a pair of wide, black shoes with unusually wide, white laces.
“Where will you run now, brats?!” Mike shouted in a threatening voice, pointing to the fact that it was a dead-end alley with only one way out.

“Hey, you! I don’t give a damn who you are, but they are MY prey! Got it?” Jordan pointed towards Mike.
“Step away. This is between me and the twins!”
“Who? Those little guys?!” Jordan turned around, looking at the twins hiding behind Isa and Jean.
“Not them you idiot, although they’re in on it too! I’m talking about the other twins!”
“What other twins?!” Nick asked, confused.
“The pink and blue brat!” Agitated, Mike shouted.

As Nick turned to look at the boy and girl, he finally noticed it! Even though their hair and outfit were totally different, their faces were the same! A twin boy and a girl, who would’ve thought.
“Mike, they were our Strikers to begin with! So leave us alone ok?!” One of the twin boys shouted, from behind Isa.
“Shut it, brat! Your sister stole them from me! Now give em back! Both of them!”
“No!” Isa replied.
“Wait! The two twins are siblings?!” Nick’s head almost exploded from the obscurity of this.
“It’s more common than you’d think.” Brendon replied to him.

“Hey you!” Isa pointed at Nick. “If you want to battle us, beat him first!
“Hey! Don’t involve me in this!”
“Do as she says, Nick!” Jordan shoved Nick towards Mike.
“Step away! This isn’t your fight!”
“Well…”Nick looked at the two scared kids, thinking of what to say. “From what I heard, seems like they were only taking back what was theirs. So I see no reason to hunt them for it.”
“You don’t get it do ya? I won the two Strikers in a battle! A battle THEY started.”
“No, YOU don’t get it!” From that last statement Nick seemed a bit disturbed, even angry at Mike. He took out his launcher and controller. “I mean…why the hell would you take their strikers if they lost? Your prize is the feeling you get from winning! It’s the feeling when you give it your all and overcome the opponent! Their loss should make them train harder and be stronger! But if you take away their striker, how can they improve?! THEY CAN’T! So if you still want to take their striker, LET’S GO!” He revved up his striker.

“Fine then! But know that they have something of MINE as well!” He got up from his bike and took out a launcher, with the Striker already attached to it. He then placed the launcher in a holster that seemed specifically designed for it. The holster was attached to the back wheel and was designed so it would keep the button pressed, and spin if the wheel was to spin as well. “Let’s start!” Mike put on his controller and jumped back on his bike, holding down the front brake as his Striker – Pantera, was revving up. “We’ll only fight one battle. I win, I get the twins! You win, you get them!”
“Deal!” Nick replied, battle-ready.

Mike smirked as he began pedaling. His back wheel started spinning in place as the bike remained stationary.
“Before this battle starts, one thing you need to know about me!” His smile faded away as his face grew serious and dark. “Just like any tournament, this one has a ranking as well. And in this tournament….” He then lifted his bike, balancing it on the front wheel as he paddled, spinning the front wheel in mid-air. “I’m ranked FIRST!” His bike spun as his feet were in the air! Pantera shot off like a rocket towards Nick. Like a small hurricane it approached him in a mili-second. Not even enough time to react! Only thing he could do…was pulling up his launcher! While STILL attached to the launcher, Piranha's tip clashed with the opponent! They collided as the force overwhelmed Nick! He tried to hold on…but he never stood a chance!

Just as soon as the impact happened, Nick was sent flying backwards. The black predator had torn through him…Was the battle already over?!
Jul. 15, 2011  1:37 AM
 
YES!!! Thank you so much for bringing this story back! This chapter was really good. I love the way that you describe the characters in your story, it really let's readers connect with them. Please, continue with this story!
Jul. 15, 2011  5:39 PM
 
Nice Chapter.

Whoa didn't expect that with Jordan, interesting.

2 set of twins, how cool I wonder how they battle.
Jul. 16, 2011  3:23 AM
 
Nice.
This story is the best one I ever seen in WBO.
Jul. 16, 2011  4:51 AM
 
aww man, now ill naver find out what happens in that battle. thats the same chapter you stoped with on striker axis. i want more, kollosos, i want more!!!!!
Jul. 16, 2011  6:03 AM
 
well written! but im not really into battle strikers.if you changed the word battle striker each time it was written and changed it to beyblade you would have a perfect beyblade story!
Jul. 16, 2011  8:07 AM
 
err no, ive read this whole thing through a couple times and changing battle strikers to beyblade every time wont work, there is to many other references on it to battle strikers to make that work. plus i do say this, even if you dont like battle strikers, this is still a great story to read. if battle strikers didnt exist but this story did, it would create the toy. plus sucks, why did you even click on this if you don't like battle strikers? kollosos, you know, you are my inspiration to write you know that. i wouldnt be writing my storys if i havent read this one. thank you.
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