Vendetta [ Now TakingCharacter Requests! Chapter 4 in the OP!]

Poll: Awesome!, Medium or Stupid?

Awesome!
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Regular
50.00%
1
Sucks. Needs to be deleted.
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Total: 100% 2 vote(s)
Vendetta

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...Uh, I really didn't understand a thing...

A lot of Grammar and spelling mistakes. The story is fast, make slow but detailed.

KIU
Probably because you don't know what is GOING to happen it will be a bit mysterious but it works in my brain. It may not work for yours.
Not because of that. Of course you know, Your the flippin creator! I'm just the reader XD

here's a better version (to my Opinion, That is XD)
Quote:I woke up, then suddenly something flashed in my mind: it was what happend on that rainy day 6 years ago. I saw my brother: Roy. He is eight so he barely remembers that moment in October. But I do, and it still haunts me. The reason is why it shows at this time is because it is the same day, 6 years ago. Now, I'm old enough to understand, However I still don't know why it had happened. But still, I am fighting for my life and Roy. My name is Kouhser, But Kurt for short. I thought, why would Roberto do that? If he had a point, what was it? Roy and I are homeless, as you might know. But when a man about in his thirties now, Roberto Quilpac, a man who is also from my dad's work, tried to just make a simple tea drink and conversation, but what he meant to do, was fulfilled. Roberto also invited Me and Roy over, just because he has a son about my age, to have us accompanied. But when I heard that gun shot I ran upstairs and saw both of them; both my mom and dad dead, motionless on their chairs. I looked up and saw Roberto, with just a simple pistol, about to shoot me. However, he ran downstairs and stayed there. I quickly gathered Roy and ran away deep into the heart of Detroit. So that is where we are now. Roy and I just walk. It gets too dark, we sleep on any bench we can find. I am furious at Roberto, and I will never forget it. I will track down Roberto, kill him and flee to Delaware where most of my relatives are. So, I went to where I think Roberto is each day. Roy does not know what I am doing, but that is good. I do not want him to know. But I promised, since that very day, that I will kill Roberto Quilpac.
OK thanks. Updated. Chapter 2 will be in the OP sometime next week. DJ 2002 - Yeah!
REALLY, I will close this if no one posts on it! I have only had 1 response!
Um... hello... cinnamon bread tastes yummy... guns are scary... and, uh, good luck writing... don't close the thread...
So do you think it is good?
pretty good bro!
Thanks Chapter 2 up in 2 minutes! Hah...
I am now taking character requests but only for bad guys because already made up good guys.
ONLY THE FIRST TEN! Here is how you do it:
Name: [not very original though]
Weapon of choice:
Age:
Personality:
Reason for being that bad guy:
name: Shionji Naoyuki

Weapon: Scythe

age: 15

Personality: doesn't talk much, hates people

Reason: I'm trying to get in more stories, and all
Name: Keenan Nodda Weapon Of Choice: Twin Sais Age:14 Reason: i like stories Personality: Smart, overconfident
Quote:Weapon: Scythe
May I ask what that is?
Never mind, found out.
Chapter 3: Maybe tomorrow or the next or next.
Keenan will appear in the next chapter but Shionji may have to wait. I have perfect plans for Keenan...
Warning! Chapter 3 has just been posted, but extremely long! Not chapter 3 [down there]
Chapter 4 up tonight or tomorrow...
nice beginning it really hooks the reader so keep on writing and you will probably become a great author (if you want to be one) and btw nice signiture!
Thanks on both. Did you read Chapter 3?