The War of Three Worlds: The Six Entities

Poll: How is this Book?

Interesting, want to know more.
57.89%
11
Not really my style
10.53%
2
It's good
15.79%
3
It's ok-ish
5.26%
1
I don't even know what to say
10.53%
2
Total: 100% 19 vote(s)
Ryuga you have out done yourself you are basically god in my books!!!! just wow!!!! and you made this up all on your own???
(May. 05, 2021  3:45 AM)i'm batman Wrote: Okay, here's the review:
Plot: 5/5. The plot advances quite a bit and seems very interesting.
Dialogue: 4.5/5. There's not much dialogue, but that's understandable as this is a more action oriented chapter.
Characterization: 5/5. They are new characters, so I don't really know them well enough to say what's in-character or out-of-character for them. The characterization within the chapter seems consistent though.
Grammar: 4.5/5. I noticed just one or two wrong choice of words but nothing too serious.
Action: 5/5. The action part is well-described and I liked it.
Overall: 24/25. Great chapter. Keep it up.
I used PinkRose's rating system except for the last one I replaced Battles with Action as this is not a Beyblade fic.

Okay thank you. This review seems fair.

(May. 05, 2021  5:29 AM)SSJBDoku Wrote: Ryuga you have out done yourself you are basically god in my books!!!! just wow!!!! and you made this up all on your own???

If I were to be honest, I say that I had help from a friend of mine. I did make up some things, but I did have help from my friend. Thanks for the compliment.
well still even with the help of a friend it would have taken some big mindpower to come up with an idea like this you should publish it and let the whole world know
(May. 05, 2021  10:47 PM)SSJBDoku Wrote: well still even with the help of a friend it would have taken some big mindpower to come up with an idea like this you should publish it and let the whole world know

Um it'll take a long time. Writing a whole book, editing, etc takes about  2-3 year.

(May. 05, 2021  5:29 AM)SSJBDoku Wrote: Ryuga you have out done yourself you are basically god in my books!!!! just wow!!!! and you made this up all on your own???

Saying "you are basically god in my books!!!!" maybe is a bit too much. I do appreciate your kindness, but I've seen and meet and talked to many writes that surpass me in writing.
Chapter 5: Titan Realm Tribulation

i'm batman
SSJBDoku
WorldKai

Really good Ryuga really enjoyable and really well written
Chapter 6: Titan Realm

SSJBDoku
i'm batman

etc everyone who reads this. Please rate this chapter
Great book so far. Get it published. Maybe you can use my character in your book. Just pm me if your interested in using her.
By the way, The Protagonist is Six. Kinda like how Darth Vader was the protagonist. This guy is corrupt and power-hungry

(May. 12, 2021  4:10 PM)kai edits Wrote: Great book so far. Get it published. Maybe you can use my character in your book. Just pm me if your interested in using her.

I'm not done with the book, just 100 pages in total. I have to edit it, find mistakes, it'll take years.
(May. 12, 2021  4:15 PM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote: By the way, The Protagonist is Six. Kinda like how Darth Vader was the protagonist. This guy is corrupt and power-hungry

(May. 12, 2021  4:10 PM)kai edits Wrote: Great book so far. Get it published. Maybe you can use my character in your book. Just pm me if your interested in using her.

I'm not done with the book, just 100 pages in total. I have to edit it, find mistakes, it'll take years.
I know just saying as a option in the future.
(May. 12, 2021  4:20 PM)kai edits Wrote:
(May. 12, 2021  4:15 PM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote: By the way, The Protagonist is Six. Kinda like how Darth Vader was the protagonist. This guy is corrupt and power-hungry


I'm not done with the book, just 100 pages in total. I have to edit it, find mistakes, it'll take years.
I know just saying as a option in the future.

i thought you left '-'
(May. 12, 2021  4:23 PM)sushiroll1234 Wrote:
(May. 12, 2021  4:20 PM)kai edits Wrote: I know just saying as a option in the future.

i thought you left '-'

Please don't start a whole new argument. He's here, so he is. I'm SICK of this. This is my book's thread, so stay on topic.

(May. 12, 2021  4:20 PM)kai edits Wrote:
(May. 12, 2021  4:15 PM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote: By the way, The Protagonist is Six. Kinda like how Darth Vader was the protagonist. This guy is corrupt and power-hungry


I'm not done with the book, just 100 pages in total. I have to edit it, find mistakes, it'll take years.
I know just saying as a option in the future.

Yes. I will probaby do that. Thanks dude.
Ryuga this is amazing it keeps me on the edge of my seat every time that i read it can't wait for the next chapter
(May. 13, 2021  2:56 AM)SSJBDoku Wrote: Ryuga this is amazing it keeps me on the edge of my seat every time that i read it can't wait for the next chapter

Yes, I'll post it soon
Chapter 8: Six’s Quest

*****
I love this series one of the best on WBO.
Really good story line and grammar.
The characters are really well produced and stick to their personality types well.
(May. 17, 2021  3:37 AM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote: Chapter 8: Six’s Quest

*****

Great chapter! And the sink-or-swim mentor kind of personality fits Quan Roth well. I also love that Six is a bit snarky (I imagined him saying the last line not with a pained, afraid or tired expression but rather with an annoyed face).
(May. 17, 2021  3:53 AM)i'm batman Wrote:
(May. 17, 2021  3:37 AM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote: Chapter 8: Six’s Quest

*****

Great chapter! And the sink-or-swim mentor kind of personality fits Quan Roth well. I also love that Six is a bit snarky (I imagined him saying the last line not with a pained, afraid or tired expression but rather with an annoyed face).

Yeah, Quan Roth's that type of character. Currently, he's the most powerful character by far. he could destroy the Entities with a snap. But, he can't, since the last spell of the Order of Light constrained him from harming The Entities. Also, yes, Six is that type of guy (um not guy Entity lol).

Well, any questions about this Book?
(May. 17, 2021  4:49 AM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote:
(May. 17, 2021  3:53 AM)i\m batman Wrote: Great chapter! And the sink-or-swim mentor kind of personality fits Quan Roth well. I also love that Six is a bit snarky (I imagined him saying the last line not with a pained, afraid or tired expression but rather with an annoyed face).

Yeah, Quan Roth's that type of character. Currently, he's the most powerful character by far. he could destroy the Entities with a snap. But, he can't, since the last spell of the Order of Light constrained him from harming The Entities. Also, yes, Six is that type of guy (um not guy Entity lol).

Well, any questions about this Book?

Is Six the antagonist or a villain protagonist?
(May. 17, 2021  4:58 AM)i\m batman Wrote:
(May. 17, 2021  4:49 AM)Ryuga\s Son Wrote: Yeah, Quan Roth's that type of character. Currently, he's the most powerful character by far. he could destroy the Entities with a snap. But, he can't, since the last spell of the Order of Light constrained him from harming The Entities. Also, yes, Six is that type of guy (um not guy Entity lol).

Well, any questions about this Book?

Is Six the antagonist or a villain protagonist?

not villian protagonist, Let's say he is a Evil Protagonist.
Chapter 9: The Drunk Entities


Character Contest Form:

Name:


Personality:


Appearance:

Speciality: (Mage, Necromancer, Cultivator, User of the Forsaken Tongue (Forsaken Tongue is different from Cultivation, it's a magic language), Warrior, Martial Artist, Monk,):


Backstory:


Powers:


Race: (Human, Elves, Dwarves, Dragon, Wyvern, Kraken, Shinigami, etc any race you can come up with):
Name: Liam Alexander Franklin


Personality: Liam's personality is very close to that of the zodiac sign Leo the Lion.


Appearance: Liam has midnight black hair tied back into a tight man bun and a stubble beard. His eyes are green with red specks and he has a turned up nose. He is 1 metre and 75 centimetres tall. He is always wearing a Blue GI and black shoes

Speciality: Martial Artist


Backstory: Liam's Father's name is Benjamin and his mothers name is Amy and he was raise in a small village where they were always fighting because Wolfs and other dangerous animals and the occasional bandit were attacking them. One year his father caught a terrible cold and Liam had to step up to help the village fight and that's how he got his fighting skills.
He is only at the Mortal realm's first stage

Powers: None … yet but he has a lot of martial arts moves like: wolf fang fist, meteor rush and dragon crash


Race: Can it be Saiyan if it can't then I'll just go with Human
(May. 19, 2021  12:51 AM)SSJBDoku Wrote: Name: Liam Alexander Franklin


Personality: Liam's personality is very close to that of the zodiac sign Leo the Lion.


Appearance: Liam has midnight black hair tied back into a tight man bun and a stubble beard. His eyes are green with red specks and he has a turned up nose. He is 1 metre and 75 centimetres tall. He is always wearing a Blue GI and black shoes

Speciality: Martial Artist


Backstory: Liam's Father's name is Benjamin and his mothers name is Amy and he was raise in a small village where they were always fighting because Wolfs and other dangerous animals and the occasional bandit were attacking them. One year his father caught a terrible cold and Liam had to step up to help the village fight and that's how he got his fighting skills.
He is only at the Mortal realm's first stage

Powers: None … yet but he has a lot of martial arts moves like: wolf fang fist, meteor rush and dragon crash


Race: Can it be Saiyan if it can't then I'll just go with Human

Good, but I will point out a few mistakes.

1. Personality. You have to use at least 5 sentences to describe it.
2. For the first stage of Mortal Realm, that is only for those who are Cultivators
3. It cannot be Saiyan because this is my book, and copying Saiyan from Dragon Ball will be copyright and I will be fined.

Otherwise, it's good.
Alright then i'll go into a bit of depth then. BTW remove wolf fang fist and meteor rush because that is from dragon ball go with air blades and human wrecking ball
personality:
Liam's mostly warm, passionate, and dynamic. He delights in opportunities to let his charismatic, inclusive personality shine. And like the lion that represents him, Liam is also strong, brave, and ready to dominate everything he sets out to do. Once Liam sets a goal, he pursues it with a single-minded determination. If Liam sets his mind on something, everyone better get out of his way! Liam is also a natural born leader his charisma draws people to him, and his self-confidence inspires trust in his abilities. Additionally, his generosity and optimism breeds loyalty in those he leads. Don't get on his bad side though because he will destroy you literally.

By the way can Liam change to cultivator with some martial arts skill if not just completely change him to cultivator hope this works well enjoy
Chapter 10: The Depths


i'm batman
SSJBDoku