Poison Serpent SW145SD draft. [It's up, hurrah!]

On the part where you put SW145 has three 'wings' you could also put 'fangs' because it would fit more into the serpent theme
'Theme' doesn't matter.
Just change the serpent description to what I suggested, which is in line with beywiki standards, and the article is perfect.
Honestly, it's better than a lot of currently existing artocles, you should have no problem getting it approved. I guess you should change the title to indicate completion, as there honestly shouldn't be anything more to add, other than formatting with wiki code (whoevers job that is). I've run it through word to check for spelling/grammar, and it didn't find anything (well, once you change the serpent description).

I kinda feel like I've muscled in here, but the article is all yours, so yeah Smile

Edit: As for the "fang" thing, given they don't really look like fangs, and we usually use "wing" to describe a structure like that, leave it Tongue_out
Done.
Not changing the CW part?
"The Serpent Clear Wheel has a rather angular design featuring eight serpents overlapping and interlocking with each other in a pattern reminiscent of a Celtic knot. The original release is deep green."
Is in line with other beywiki articles.

Of course,if you don't want to change it, you don't have to Tongue_out
Chance the part which says SD is the only reason to buy this bey. SW145 is useful.
It says "only real reason", which is fair enough, as SD is the only top tier part in the bey.
Don't get me wrong, SW145 isn't bad, but there are normally better options, it's a pretty niche part.


Other than the CW thing, Wraith, just go through and change every "it's" to "its", unless it's used as a shortening of "it is" (which I don't think there is in this article.).
(Dec. 27, 2010  1:19 AM)Wraith Wrote: Face: Serpent
Weight: 1.1 grams
The Face depicts Serpens, The Serpent, one of the 88 constellations in space.

Clear Wheel: Serpent
Weight: 3.1 grams
This Clear Wheel's rather angular design features eight serpents overlapping and interlocking with each other in a pattern reminiscent of a Celtic knot. Its original release is deep green.

Metal Wheel: Poison
Weight: 29.8 grams
Poison has fifteen rectangular protrusions on its circumference, each the same size and about 4 mm apart at the widest point. While this is not wide enough to provide useful Smash Attack, it still produces relatively large amounts of recoil, making this part useless for Defense or Stamina. Furthermore, similar to Flame, the Wheel is raised at the base, exposing the Track to opposing Beys, making it even less useful for Defense purposes.
This recoil is worsened by the light weight of the Wheel, which allows it to be easily knocked around and KO'ed by opposing Beys. Due to these factors, Poison has absolutely no competitive use.

Track: Switch 145
Weight: 4.2 grams
SW145 has three 'wings'. The gimmick of this Track is the ability to change from Attack to Defense by taking off the wings, and then putting them on the opposite way. The purpose of this is the ability to adapt to opponent Beys. In Attack mode, which is denoted by six grey claw-like stickers on the underside, the pointed ends of the Track are used for Smash Attack; meanwhile in Defense mode, shown by three triangular blue stickers, the edges are more rounded, in order to deflect opponent Beys. The modes are reversed for Left-Spin Beys. Testing has shown that SW145 is quite useful at attacking lower opponents in a similar fashion to H145 and R145. It is however outclassed for Defense purposes by GB145, BD145, and 230 due to the recoil it produces.

Use in Attack Customisation:
SW145 finds a use in the rather niche customisation Lightning L Drago SW145RF, lining up with the heads of Lightning to provide Smash Attack.

Bottom: Semi-Defense
Weight: 0.5 grams
SD is the only real reason to buy this Beyblade. Just as the Semi-Flat Bottom has a sharper tip than Flat, so too does Semi-Defense when compared to Defense. Before the release of SD, D was the absolute best Stamina Bottom available, but SD took over.

SD is not able to wobble as much as D, so for defensive purposes, D should still be chosen over SD if you are trying to add some Stamina to your Defense custom. That being said, WD would be a better choice than D for that situation, and arguably for Stamina as well because it has an even wider tip. With it, it is allowed to circle the stadium in some situations when it is on a larger angle towards the end of a battle, thus outspinning D or SD based opponents. However, sometimes this does not happen, and SD easily knocks over the wobbling WD custom before it topples over itself.

It really comes down to personal preference when deciding whether to use SD or WD because they are so closely matched. For pure Stamina it is impossible to tell which would win any given match, but WD would prepare you for more situations by being able to take hits better than SD. Test both and decide for yourself which one works best for what you are trying to do.

Use in Stamina Customization:
SD has found use in Burn Bull 145SD, among other customs.

Other Versions:
Burn Serpent WA130ES - Random Booster Vol.5 Grand Ketos (Light Red)
Storm Serpent T125HF - Random Booster Vol.5 Grand Ketos (Deep Purple)

Overall
The only real reason to buy this is SD. While SW145 has some use, there are generally better alternatives. This means that there is little or no reason to buy this Beyblade.

I edited hopefully all the grammatical errors, as well as adding some fluency. I changed a lot of the SW145 section since I felt most of it was contradictory; have a look and tell me what you think, really. In the overall section I removed the "better" alternative Dark Bull, which, for all intents and purposes, is completely similar and not a significant improvement on Poison Serpent.

Really, I just want to get this up since this is one of the most useless Beys ever, haha. Let me know what you guys think.
That's excellent, ♥.

I'd prefer the CW sentence starting with "The Serpent Clear Wheel's rather angular design..." or "Serpent's rather angular design...", as that seems to be the standard opening, and just sounds nicer to me.

Wraith may have more to say, but yeah, I think that's awesome.

I think the thing with Dark Bull is because it IS similar, but a better buy, as it comes with SD, H145 (which is often better than SW145), and Bull, which is useful, at least moreso than Serpent. Dark is arguably less useless than Poison, too Tongue_out Still, it's probably not necessary.
I originally wrote "Serpent's rather angular design", but I felt it was awkward to have the word serpent twice in one sentence.

Hmm, I thought about that too - I doubt there are any recorded tests comparing SW145 and H145, but I would assume they are quite similar. The reason is, I didn't really want to recommend a similarly useless Bey, even if it was more useful than Poison Serpent, haha.
I can understand that. I would personally go with "The Serpent Clear Wheel's rather angular design", but honestly, that's little more than personal preference.

And yeah, fair enough about Dark Bull.

Well, I certainly think it's good enough to go up, better than a few articles already on the wiki, even.
http://wiki.worldbeyblade.org/index.php/...nt_SW145SD

Okay right guys, it's up! Need some images, but at least the text is up. Let me know if there are any errors.
Awesome, I'll take a look when I have my laptop. I'll take pics when I'm better if no one does in the mean time.
Thanks Kei. It's great.
Well, a great article about a bad bey is finally up. It looks great! Well, am I allowed to give some pics?
I think you should ask a mod, but it should be fine.
Congrats Wraith. Joyful_2 Although my article has been finished for a few months now, you beat me. (Kei was supposed to check my article, but he checked your for seome reason and never checked mine like he said he would.) But, congrats. At least it's finally up. Joyful_2
Thanks.