My Avatar Fan Fiction

Hi, I'm Akio and this is my fan fiction for Avatar: The Last Airbender. I know what your thinking, its that your tired of me writing bad stories and ditching them, that's just me, I hope you get amusement from this and think it`s good.
Prologue
Chapter 1: A New Avatar, A New World
Chapter 2: Training Days Part 1
Chapter 3:Training Days Part 2
Here are some drawings. Here's Max: And here's Alex
Chapter 1 in the OP, sorry for double posting.
That..is very bad..no offense...
Not so great, but I kinda like it. O: Better than the carp others write.
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:04 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote: Not so great, but I kinda like it. O: Better than the carp others write.
What others?

(Jul. 28, 2012  8:05 PM)Basalt Orogya Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:04 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote: Not so great, but I kinda like it. O: Better than the carp others write.
What others?

I'm not going to mention any names. I don't want to offend anybody.
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:09 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:05 PM)Basalt Orogya Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:04 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote: Not so great, but I kinda like it. O: Better than the carp others write.
What others?

I'm not going to mention any names. I don't want to offend anybody.

Like mine. Tired
i think he means more like mine...
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:10 PM)ChinaBladeâ„¢ Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:09 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:05 PM)Basalt Orogya Wrote: What others?

I'm not going to mention any names. I don't want to offend anybody.

Like mine. Tired

This is SPAM, don't get this off topic please.
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:11 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:10 PM)ChinaBladeâ„¢ Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:09 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote: I'm not going to mention any names. I don't want to offend anybody.

Like mine. Tired

This is SPAM, don't get this off topic please.

Look who's talking.


Anyways, Akio, you should work on this. It's not the best, but it can be one of the best. If you work on the grammar and spelling, it may be good.
Also, make the chapters longer.
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:13 PM)ChinaBladeâ„¢ Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:11 PM)TysonIsDaBest Wrote:
(Jul. 28, 2012  8:10 PM)ChinaBladeâ„¢ Wrote: Like mine. Tired

This is SPAM, don't get this off topic please.

Look who's talking.


Anyways, Akio, you should work on this. It's not the best, but it can be one of the best. If you work on the grammar and spelling, it may be good.
Also, make the chapters longer.
Well, he did say that he will add the rest of the chapter later.
no offence,but this is worst than my story.
Chapter 1 is in the OP. I finished Chapter 1, YEAH!
I think you need to proof read it, it needs a little work, but I see where you're going with it.
You can make characters for the story, I will try hard to incorporate them in the story.
(Jul. 28, 2012  11:48 PM)Akio314 Wrote: You can make characters for the story, I will try hard to incorporate them in the story.

I'll try, I suppose.
Thanks, It'll be fun seeing what you guys can make, I need a comic relief character like Sokka or Bo Lin.
It`s OK, but it doesn't really look like you are revising it. You should write a rough draft first, and then check your grammar and spelling, and see how you can make it better. Also you should make the chapters longer. You should make it so it makes sense. I suggest using Microsoft Word, it works well.

It has some potential, so I would recommend rewriting the chapters, make them longer, and read it to family and friends to see what they think.

Would you like me to try to make a character for the story?
Yes Sir, I need a new character. Thanks for the constructive criticism too.
Yeah no problem.

Here is what the Character can look like:
http://postimage.org/image/yywill7i1/ff88639c/

I was thinking he could be an airbender. Do whatever you want with it. Hope I could help.

Here's mine:

He is Max's trainer, since he is still so young. His name is Jin. He has had many years of training in the war of the elements. And Jin's master told him to go train the young avatar, so that he will some day become as strong as Jin.

Haha, there's my character. Hope ya can maybe do something with that.
Sorry guys, I'm on vacation and I will be back in 3 days.
It's okay. Hope you enjoy your vacation, I didn't go on one sadly.
It's not too far from where I live. Also, I'm going to make Jin Max's Airbending mentor.