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[Fan Fiction] Beyblade: Metal Burst (Rebooted)
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I have a series with the same concept! Although, my version of the beys burst. You wouldn't be able to call it Beyblade Burst without bursting.
(Jul. 07, 2022 5:17 AM)TylerOfChaos Wrote: I have a series with the same concept! Although, my version of the beys burst. You wouldn't be able to call it Beyblade Burst without bursting.
Ah, I see.
The system does allow beyblades to burst but only if the bladers choose to do so in battle (as stated in the overview). Maybe I wasn't as clear there. Ill have a quick look again, and name some of the sections of the Overview to make it easier to read.
My personal bey is called Terrios, the Dragon of Chaos. If you can, maybe we can battle!
And pretty good for a first episode
And pretty good for a first episode
(Jul. 07, 2022 12:15 PM)WizardBlader Wrote:(Jul. 07, 2022 5:17 AM)TylerOfChaos Wrote: I have a series with the same concept! Although, my version of the beys burst. You wouldn't be able to call it Beyblade Burst without bursting.
Ah, I see.
The system does allow beyblades to burst but only if the bladers choose to do so in battle (as stated in the overview). Maybe I wasn't as clear there. Ill have a quick look again, and name some of the sections of the Overview to make it easier to read.
Episode 1 is now out!
Its not my best episode, but quality will totally get better as the season advances.Spoiler (Click to View)
Please leave what you think about this chapter! ^-^
-WizardBlader
Why does this Aleck Character remind me of Sanji This was a pretty Good First Chapter but I feel like it was weird how you introduced the Main Character since he seemingly appeared like a Side-Character and this First Chapter didn't really feel like a First Chapter tbh. It felt like a Chapter to introduce a Side-Character that would happen in the middle of the story. But this was also pretty good and the details were also pretty good so for a First Chapter it wasn't awful but it wasn't amazing either. You should know that your Story is at the beginning area so you need to make it feel like it is the beginning by slowly introducing Characters one by one and making it clear who the Main Protag is since I personally couldn't tell. Great start to the story besides these details and I feel like there is some great potential in this story so I'll be keeping tabs on this. Nice Work so far though!
(Jul. 09, 2022 6:00 AM)IUnseenBurst Wrote:Thanks for the review! For this chapter, I wanted to introduce Benjamin and Xaviero a bit slower, and keep the focus on the MB system. Maybe I overdid what was I felt for the chapter, and should’ve made the main characters have more ‘screen-time’.(Jul. 07, 2022 12:15 PM)WizardBlader Wrote: Ah, I see.
The system does allow beyblades to burst but only if the bladers choose to do so in battle (as stated in the overview). Maybe I wasn't as clear there. Ill have a quick look again, and name some of the sections of the Overview to make it easier to read.
Episode 1 is now out!
Its not my best episode, but quality will totally get better as the season advances.Spoiler (Click to View)
Please leave what you think about this chapter! ^-^
-WizardBlader
Why does this Aleck Character remind me of Sanji This was a pretty Good First Chapter but I feel like it was weird how you introduced the Main Character since he seemingly appeared like a Side-Character and this First Chapter didn't really feel like a First Chapter tbh. It felt like a Chapter to introduce a Side-Character that would happen in the middle of the story. But this was also pretty good and the details were also pretty good so for a First Chapter it wasn't awful but it wasn't amazing either. You should know that your Story is at the beginning area so you need to make it feel like it is the beginning by slowly introducing Characters one by one and making it clear who the Main Protag is since I personally couldn't tell. Great start to the story besides these details and I feel like there is some great potential in this story so I'll be keeping tabs on this. Nice Work so far though!
I’ll revise the other chapters to perhaps prevent this from happening,
-WizardBlader
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(Jul. 14, 2022 12:17 PM)WizardBlader Wrote: Episode Two is out!
Leave a review, to let me know how this one is!Spoiler (Click to View)
-WizardBlader
First off, I'm really liking the more down-to-earth conversations/dialogue you put in, it gives off a human vibe to the characters but it isn't too casual to stray off from Beyblade's usual style. But what I noticed from the first chapter and this was that the battles were quite short, so maybe extend them a bit and don't rely too much on special moves. Overall, it's a nice story so far and I'm looking forward to whatever you put out following this.
(Jul. 14, 2022 2:15 PM)SpeedySuomi Wrote:(Jul. 14, 2022 12:17 PM)WizardBlader Wrote: Episode Two is out!
Leave a review, to let me know how this one is!Spoiler (Click to View)
-WizardBlader
First off, I'm really liking the more down-to-earth conversations/dialogue you put in, it gives off a human vibe to the characters but it isn't too casual to stray off from Beyblade's usual style. But what I noticed from the first chapter and this was that the battles were quite short, so maybe extend them a bit and don't rely too much on special moves. Overall, it's a nice story so far and I'm looking forward to whatever you put out following this.
Thanks for the review! Ill try my best to implement the suggestions you provided in later chapters!
Thanks again,
-WizardBlader
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(Aug. 12, 2022 5:04 AM)WizardBlader Wrote: Sorry for posting so late! I hadn't finished the Chapter earlier today, so I had to work overtime to make sure I hit the deadline today.
This is definitely my longest Chapter ever, might be a bit boring??? If it is, please leave why, and what should be improved on later chapters.
Episode 6:
Spoiler (Click to View)
I'm really interested in this, when are you releasing more of Beyblade: Metal Burst?
(Aug. 12, 2022 1:48 PM)Dragon Blader Z Wrote:I'm glad you're interested in this series! ^^(Aug. 12, 2022 5:04 AM)WizardBlader Wrote: Sorry for posting so late! I hadn't finished the Chapter earlier today, so I had to work overtime to make sure I hit the deadline today.
This is definitely my longest Chapter ever, might be a bit boring??? If it is, please leave why, and what should be improved on later chapters.
Episode 6:
Spoiler (Click to View)
I'm really interested in this, when are you releasing more of Beyblade: Metal Burst?
I try my best to release episodes once a week, on either a Thursday, or a Friday. Fridays are only when I haven't worked on the chapter how I wanted it to go, and I had to work extra.
when are you releasing next episode, most likely Thursday and Friday
(Aug. 12, 2022 6:39 PM)WizardBlader Wrote:.(Aug. 12, 2022 1:48 PM)Dragon Blader Z Wrote: I'm really interested in this, when are you releasing more of Beyblade: Metal Burst?I'm glad you're interested in this series! ^^
I try my best to release episodes once a week, on either a Thursday, or a Friday. Fridays are only when I haven't worked on the chapter how I wanted it to go, and I had to work extra.
Just don't sacrifice quality over it, that's a common mistake. Take your time when you need to and don't fear being late with chapters that much.
(Aug. 14, 2022 4:47 PM)Dragon Blader Z Wrote: when are you releasing next episode, most likely Thursday and Friday
Yes, either Thursday or Friday. It might be a tad bit later this time.
(Aug. 14, 2022 11:50 PM)Hollowmind8 Wrote:(Aug. 12, 2022 6:39 PM)WizardBlader Wrote: I'm glad you're interested in this series! ^^.
I try my best to release episodes once a week, on either a Thursday, or a Friday. Fridays are only when I haven't worked on the chapter how I wanted it to go, and I had to work extra.
Just don't sacrifice quality over it, that's a common mistake. Take your time when you need to and don't fear being late with chapters that much.
Thanks for the advice. I appreciate it a lot.
FYI, this episode will be very late, as I've been trying to concentrate on school the entire week (As my mother wished me to do so), instead of working of the 7th Episode.
Ill try to begin work on it when I'm able to, bit by bit.
Apologies,
-WizardBlader
Ill try to begin work on it when I'm able to, bit by bit.
Apologies,
-WizardBlader
(Aug. 16, 2022 6:05 PM)WizardBlader Wrote: FYI, this episode will be very late, as I've been trying to concentrate on school the entire week (As my mother wished me to do so), instead of working of the 7th Episode..
Ill try to begin work on it when I'm able to, bit by bit.
Apologies,
-WizardBlader
School is more important, so no apologies needed. Take care of your life before everything else, else you won't be able to do the "everything else" good (if at all)
(Aug. 16, 2022 10:22 PM)Hollowmind8 Wrote:Thank you so much for understanding! ^^(Aug. 16, 2022 6:05 PM)WizardBlader Wrote: FYI, this episode will be very late, as I've been trying to concentrate on school the entire week (As my mother wished me to do so), instead of working of the 7th Episode..
Ill try to begin work on it when I'm able to, bit by bit.
Apologies,
-WizardBlader
School is more important, so no apologies needed. Take care of your life before everything else, else you won't be able to do the "everything else" good (if at all)
I appreciate the advice a lot.
-WizardBlader