[Beyblade Story] Awakening Of The Soul

Probably my first Good story

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

To be written soon
Ok first off, you may want to make this a bit more "child friendly."
Grammar and spelling need a lot of work, the plot jumps like a kangaroo with a sugar rush, and a lot of description would help.
Needs some work, but take my advice and it should improve.
I rewrote the first chapter and changed the name

its much sorter,but don't worry the rest of the chapters will be longer
Please fix the grammar.
I can't even read it properly.
Hmmm seems alright. Just some grammar problems like Wes!, that comma shouldn't be there. At least I don't think it should. Tongue_out