World Beyblade Organization by Fighting Spirits Inc. Off-Topic Forums Your Creations

BeyBlade:the Fury

Nov. 24, 2011  11:15 PM
 
New storyline with MORE detail,starting from where i left off.
Enjoy!
[b]CHAPTER FOUR

As Ross left the stadium,Jay took his place,as Michael walked into where Adam was standing.Jay had his launcher at the ready,with his Fang Ares hooked on.Then Michael got his Vulcan Persues and his launcher ready,and the countdown starts
Battling BeyBlades:
Vulcan PersuesF:D vs. Fang AresWD145LF
3!2!1!LET IT RIP!
Persues stands in the middle of the stadium,like it was waiting to be attacked.Ares fiercely attacks Persues!Persues counter attacks with twice the power!ARES!!!Jay calls.SWORD SWIPE!!!Ares' sword slashes at Persues,but it didn't budge.
PERSUES!!!Michael cries.SPECIAL MOVE!!!SUPER SWORD SLASH ATTACK!!!A blue sword hits Ares with amazing power!As soon as Ares stops spinning,Persues' F:D activates.Michael and Persues win!!!
Next,Ross and Michael have their battle in the finals.Both bladers get their launchers ready.
Battling BeyBlades:
Vulcan Persues F:D vs. Gravity UnicornoD105WF
3!2!1!LET IT RIP!Flames and shadows clashed.Flames came from Persues as shadows come from Unicorno.What will happen next?

Hope you liked it!^_^
Sorry about that,there wasn't a new storyline
Nov. 25, 2011  2:11 AM
 
...
Add detail.
Lots of it.
Focus on the people themselves.
And MSword is the program used to type things.
Please don't tell me you write them in the text box.
Please.
Read around, look for a good story.
And use things that are possible, not Destroy Befowl or Gravity Unicorno.
Those can't work.
EVER.
And the previous topic was closed for a reason.
Review other stories.
This...
needs tons of work.
I honestly see little potential for this story, unless it was written... I don't know.... properly.
I'm not being mean.
I learned the hard way on other forums. Read, learn, write.
That's how you do it.
~X~
Nov. 25, 2011  3:14 AM
 
Listen, here's the steps to success:
  1. Do your research. That means don't pick impossible combinations.
  2. Do type it out in Microsoft Word or Keynote.
  3. Don't try to get well-known right away.
  4. Don't take character requests.
  5. Do think about what you are going to write.
  6. Don't lie about what you do or don't have or know.
  7. Do accept criticisms as they come.
  8. Don't blow the criticisms off.

Basically, ~X~ has it right. Look at Temporal's stories as a good example.
Nov. 25, 2011  9:22 AM
 
Even T.L. Drago would work. Try not to blow up. And definitely don't write with the intention of becoming a well-known writer. Vanity is in the eye of the Stupid, and the Stupid is the Vain. Stupidity is in the eye of the beholder, and the beholder is the Audience. The Audience is us. Do not make yourself come off as stupid.
Nov. 25, 2011  9:45 PM
 
Ok,thanks for the advice guys,I'll create a better story that makes sense