My Poems

I know I know.... there are A LOT. You don't have to read them all at once, but please take a look at a few!









Night’s Wind

The crimson sun sets slowly into the clouds,
The fluorescent moon lighting the dark sky in rounds.
The grass whistles as night’s wind quivers,
Sending waves of brilliant energy causing shivers.
The cold wind has gone, warm replacing,
Fear, cowardice, hate erasing.
Love has come touching the soul,
Prompting strength as the weak’s goal.
Stars creating patterns up in the sky,
A boy, laying calm, wondering why.
Night’s wind wanders the Earth crying,
Yearning for a soul, never lying.
The boy creeping deeper into his slumber,
Dreaming up dreams creating wonder.
Night’s wind’s soul locates the boy,
Seeping in his soul with joy.
Night’s wind has escaped distress,
His soul now filled with finesse.
The shining moon dissolves past the horizon...
The sun rising once again, another day will now awaken.


Circle
The majesty called the sun is laid to rest
The queen, the moon, shines its best,
The stars become the messengers of night
The wind carries tunes of glee, not of fright,
The darkness calms the mind, it sleeps without thought
The creatures come out, that the night has brought,
The eyes and the heart become one at this hour
Astounding it is, that calm brings power,
The grassy planes rustle as the wind speaks its way
The nations are at peace, which is what night will say,
The moon wanes away, weeping with dark tears
The bright day comes alive, again fear appears,
The calmness is lost, as things awaken
The day has come, night has shaken.


Night
Darkness is not what one fears
It is what brings calmness and wipes away tears,
Night is here, the wind flows over bush and tree
Creatures of the night, travel the world with glee,
The stars are messengers of the night
The wind carries the messages scaring away fright,
The boy, he sleeps, in a tent on a field
The night brings him peace, his body will yield,
When day comes again he will wake
He will be one with nature, one the night did make.


Ok, and now for one of my drama exercises I had to read a Sonnet and than make my own version of it. So here is the original and my version:

Original:
When to the sessions of sweet silent thought
I summon up remembrance of things past,
I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought,
And with old woes new wail my dear time’s waste:
Then can I drown an eye, unus’d to flow,
For precious friends hid in death’s dateless night,
And weep afresh love’s long-since cancell’d woe,
And moan the expense of many a vanish’d sight.
Then can I grieve at grievances foregone,
And heavily from woe to woe tell o’er
The sad account of fore-bemoaned moan,
Which I new pay as if not paid before.
But if the while I think on thee, dear friend,
All losses are restor’d, and sorrows end.

My version:
When I sit alone in this here room
I remember memories lost in the past,
I laugh as I think of things I have not in my grasp.
And with old and new anguishes my time is wasted:
Then I can forget how to see with my eyes,
For friends hide from a date with death this night,
And cry loves long lost song of despair,
And groan at the cost of many a crushed sight.
Then, I can lament at lamentations foregone,
And heavily from anguish to anguish tell over,
The depressing account of groan before groan,
Which I new compensate as if not compensated before,
But while I sit here alone, your memory comes to mind,
All grievances annihilated, and death I can find.

2 more poems I wrote up, nothing to do with the sonnet above:

Rain

A calm night breeze flows over tree and ground,
As a grey cloud covers up princess moon,
And begins to shed its tears.
A man lies numb, sword at his side,
As night’s tears roll down his face and corpse,
The blood runs clean fusing with earth and soil.
Rain falls continuously as lights extinguish,
Villages and towns lye down to sleep,
The water’s noise calms the soul,
As the land falls silent and and blood runs cold,
Of the corpse on the ground his soul ascending,
To worlds above in dimensions unseen,
Peace comes now as night’s tears begin to dwindle down,
The sky clears a path for princess moon,
And calmness again approaches night,
As a sleeping nation, stays silent.


Tears

A child and dog play with love and happiness,
But a man, insane, wishes to combine the love they share,
He combines them together with magic unknown,
Making a man-beast filled with sadness unequaled by any other,
A man enters the room where the beast does dwell,
And when their eyes do meet, he knows what deed has been done,
He grows silent with fury and rage,
The beast is captured by people not seen,
But the man strikes back, the beast free again,
The man searches and searches the town in worry,
While he does so, another man finds our beast,
He sees the sorrow deep in its eyes,
And to save the soul of this man beast
He separates the two with the cost of their deaths,
The man leaves the seen as the other enters in,
He spies the wall, blood scatter all over,
He knows the deed that happened but seconds before,
As tears begin to roll down his checks
And rain pours down over his soul.

here is a poem I wrote for my mom, since its her birthday today.

Flower

The violet petals shine
As blinding father son emits rays of light.
A night’s rain, just passed,
The water seeping into the soil,
Purifying the flower stem.
The majestic suns sets,
Princess moon glimmers radiantly.
Her illuminating beam of dull night light,
Intensifies the radiance of the violet color shade.
As these days progress the flower will only,
Grow larger and larger till the day it withers,
Only to be born once again.

This one is kinda a compilation of a few of my poems.

Winter’s Promise

The kingdom sun slowly falls beyond the horizon
As prince night and princess moon rise with authority.
Days short, nights long, the true coming of winter,
Shrill climates and white snow,
Painted black by the lifeless night.
Heaven, Earth Hell, meet in concord,
Birth and death intertwine and interlace,
Bringing serenity to the mind and the soul.
Fear, cowardice, hate erasing.
As a grey cloud covers up princess moon,
And begins to shed its tears.
Rain falls continuously as lights extinguish,
Villages and towns lye down to sleep,
Souls ascend to worlds above in dimensions unseen,
Peace comes now as night’s tears begin to dwindle down,
The sky clears a path for princess moon,
And calmness again approaches night,
As a sleeping nation, stays silent.

Fallen Comrade

Trees dance to the howl of the wind,
Night approaches, the sun dwindles into the depths of the unknown,
Raging fire brightens the royal blue sky,
Burnt villages cry red blood,
Deceased souls tremble at the shriek.
A hubristic army marches on laughing at the sight of mutilation,
One soldier caught in the blaze of his village sees out an open door,
A shirne encrusted with names of heroes killed in action.
He mutters: my soul, you can take, all I ask is that you,
“Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.”

Fear

Gripping, grasping, dim, and sinister,
Latching on to a doomed listener,
Besieging his soul cold,
Encasing the heart as a mold.

Fear’s hand’s razor blade sharp,
Fly stormy into the night,
Wind sounds the black harp,
Towards mistress Moon fear takes flight.

Dark clouds border Moon,
Barricade of light obstructing evil,
Reflecting off glossy serene Sea,
Piercing deep into the unknown,
Unmasking fear’s red face.
Drowning evil, bringing balance, attracting knowledge.

GOD(based of the book, Life of Pi)
Justice will prevail,
Justice will succeed,
A hyena cackles, monkey slaps, zebra kicks, fish flaps,
Delete, delete, Erase, erase.
Heavenly Orange flares swiftly under the effervescent Moon’s ray,
Whilst black striped shadows lurk on his skin,
An everlasting human soul cowers and shakes violently,
As this omnipotent being bellows as deep as the blue ocean itself,
The world shivers to a halt, freezes, cold as ice,
Lights extinguish, water discontinues to flow, the heart stops to beat.
Even the most powerful wind and strapping lightning bolts seize to exist,
This King’s roar overshadows and subdues the most menacing rolling thunder.
The child falls and shatters mentally, with only respect for this grand being,
The human can annihilate all beings, but one, just one,
This being exclaimed as God, this ferocious, but timid Tiger.

Four Nations

Darkness falls upon our planet,
As four nations, four elements clash.
Earth, Fire, Water, Wind,
Erode the balance of the world within.
Fire blazes brutally devastating all in his path,
Sharp and fierce, breaching the eye deep into the soul,
His majesty, the unpredictable phoenix soaring in golden flames.
Dualist Water, she flows calmly corroding silently,
Circular and smooth, suffocating the spirit,
Evolving to Ice as cold as a lone wolf’s howl.
Grounded Earth, shields and strikes,
Stiff and straightforward, shattering the mind,
Impressive force, a gorilla bashing his foe.
Piercing Wind, ubiquitous and keen,
Light and coercive, flowing throughout the essence,
She penetrates deep, even the strongest of rivals.
These four entities brawl for triumph,
Though achieved for all is failure and destruction.
As the simple soldiers perish in ashes,
Light shines through the darkened clouds.
A new era begins, the four nations in peace,
Alongside each other, for now at least.

DARKNESS
Darkness consumes my body like poison,
Numbing my senses and my soul,
Devouring light and love.
Oddly enough a smirk crosses my face,
This darkness penetrating my soul,
Filling me with pleasurable loathing.
Subduing my fears,
Masquerading my suspicions.
This world is so dishonest,
Shadows of fabrications lurk under every truth,
Death prowls after every life,
Darkness encompasses all light.
I really like Night's wind and Darkness Grin didn't get to read all of them yet.
They're all sort of the same ... sun, moon, darkness, etc.
I know, they do have much in common, lol.

Oh, and thanks B
Here is a new poem I just wrote. I saw the episode of Full Metal Alchemist about the talking Chimera and I wrote a poem in sonnet form(but not in Iambic Pentameter) about what I believe the character of Ed is going through. I was really intrigued by the episode, and it was very sad

Conquer

I stare down the sullen street,
Lit by dimmed yellow light,
Running from fears that cannot be beat,
For my life I flee from sight.
Alone and cold I strive onward,
Crimson blood dripping from my soul,
Dread trickling down my spinal cord,
Reaching for an unavoidable goal.
Clouds conceal the starlit night sky,
I stop and face the darkness behind,
Silence masking, my fear I defy,
Death escaped, or not? I’m blind.
As I begin to cry puddles in shrouds,
Rain falls from the dreary dark clouds.
These remind me of the sort of thing the "goth" kids that hang out in the back of class and listen to SOAD write is spiral-bound Hilroy notebooks. There seems to be very little real emotion behind them, like they;re melodramatic for the sake of being melodramatic or to get girls.
new sonnet!

Desert

The sand is cold under my feet,
The many grains covering my ankles tight,
Soft and cool devouring my body heat,
Enveloping the boundless soul of night.
I lay down allowing my body to be enclosed
By the shrouding calm sandy ground,
My soul tranquil, weightless, and composed,
My warm body motionless and bound.
The dark sky above illuminated by stars
Creating inconceivable mystical designs,
The moon’s face detailed with scars,
Starring down with and eye that aligns
The soul and body, intertwining love and hate,
Eternal knowledge is engulfed defining fate.
Interesting read...

Your ideas are in the right place, but there's not a lot of consistency between the lines. Just my opinion.
thats for your commetn AnchoredCross, I'm always glad to hear helpful criticism.

and yet another sonnet!

Dreamscape

Consumed in the core of night,
A glass wall blocking my path,
My reflection is seen in dim light,
My opposite, snickering with wrath.
Water drops creating a ripple effect,
The glass shatters, the illusion fades,
A light becomes visible I resurrect
My petrified soul from the jagged blades
Protruding from the blackness below.
I follow the path gripping my sword,
Enduring all fright that night can throw,
Scarlet blood dripping I persist forward
Toward my tranquil body sleeping soundly,
Enlightened of the night, I return profoundly.
All your poems feel exactly the same ... you need to step out of your comfort zone and do something new.
I know BeyBrad, I just like writing the way I do, lol. its hard for me to try something different, but i suppose it should be difficult.
You're a spoiled rich kid with no worries in the world.

Stop writing like you have life so bad.
(Dec. 06, 2008  4:40 AM)Roan Wrote: You're a spoiled rich kid with no worries in the world.

Stop writing like you have life so bad.
That's a bit unfair to say. The anonymity of the internet makes it easy to forget that we're talking to real people. Assuming that one has felt no pain in their life experience is a bit rash.

The poems themselves are similar, but you can change the way you write. I think your strength lies in your imagery, although adjectives often aren't as descriptive as we perceive them to be. Your most personal poems seem to draw on cliché more than anything else as well. Write your feelings out in a way that isn't so much like a MCR song.

The problem with your poetry is that each one is more akin to prose than a poem. Aside from that, their messages aren't anything of significance. What are you trying to say in them? They're mostly based around macabre scenes, in juxtaposition with the beauty around them. Their focus can be summed up by saying that the speaker is sad.

Try experimenting more with your poems. I think that the only way to be a good poet is if you start by doing something weird (in the line breaks, sentences, themes, formatting, etc.). Oftentimes, more beauty can be born from that than we deemed possible.