Elliot,Ethan, and the Nationals

Poll: How do you like my story?

Dude, your story is lame.
22.22%
4
Its okay. Needs improvement
22.22%
4
You are a talented writer
55.56%
10
Total: 100% 18 vote(s)
Chapter One
It was just like another day stuck in school, bored to death, and the teacher had assigned us tons of homework. I wish i could escape to the beystadium. My beyblade Adrenaline Orion ED145PD. The pd stands for Platinum Defense. I found on my bed a week ago. I have no idea who its from. And i've never even got the time to test it out. Oh, yeah i forgot to introduce myself. I'm Elliot Craig. I have a brother named Ethan Strine. he is adopted. His bey is Tsunami Minotaur ED145MB. Ethan is like a best friend to me. He came from conneticut. I live in California,USA. Anyways, the bell had just rang. Me and Ethan ran out of school. Then we got confronted. The first one said "Give me all your points, or I'll crush your blades!". "Yeah!" said the second one. Without a word, we all took out our beys. " 3,2,1 go shoot!". Their beys were Attack types and span around the stadium at high speed. Ours were defense types. We had the advantage and knew it. We wanted to test our true strength. but suddenly, I lost control of my speech. So did Ethan. We both said "Gemini Hero Attack!". There was a huge explosion. once the smoke cleared i could see who had won. the two bullies blades had stopped spinning. Me and Ethan's blades were still spinning. I knew this was the start of something new. (Chapter 1 finished)

Please make character requests. Thanks!
Cool story. Here are some characters for you.

Name: (No one know his name so they just call him Whirpool)
Bey: Whirpool Poseidon T120 RB
Look: Blue jeans, white T-shirt, blue jacket, blue hair.

Bey description: The metal wheel whirpool is blue and is shaped like whirpool waves in the outside and some pop up waves near the middle in the inside. The clear wheel is blue and is a whirpool. T120 (trident 120) is a blue 120 with four small gold tridents. RB (rubber ball) is a rubber ball. The facebolt is blue with a gold trident and two waves behind. Is a very powerfull bey.

Whirpool description: He is a 15 year old mysterious guy. No one knows nothing about him. Is a very good guy but no one talks with him. Whirpool is very strong blader and always is blading. He found Whirpool Poseidon when he was 8 yaers old. He was in a ship and a giant whirpool appear in front. The ship sunk and all his family died. He was the only one who survived. Under the sea he found his bey. Since then he is all mysterious.

Special Move: Giant Golden Whirpool. Appears water in the stadium and then Whirpool Poseidon Makes a giant whirpool . The tridents in his track get bigger.

He is a good guy.

Name: Briel
Beblade: Green Libra 100 WB ( Green Is like rock but bigger and green ) The bey is all green.
Special Move: Green Tornado. Libra makes a green tornado turning all things green and blowing the opponent bey away.
Look: He is obssesed with green. Green hair (hair is like ginka's), Green T shirt, Green jeans, Green shoes, Green skin.
He is a very strong blader and wants to get even stronger. He play all the time but when is time to get serius he get serius. And he is very very smart. He is good

Briel is 13 year old. From little he is beyblading. His bey was flame libra. When he was 6 there was a big explotion in his town and his fathers die. Since then he have been around the world beyblading and getting strong. In a town Green Libra felt from the sky hit him in the head. Flame libra disapered. When trainign with the very powerfull Green Libra 100WB the bey caused an explotion that turn him green.
Since then he uses his clothes all green.

They are best friends friends. They are friends since the fathers of Briel die.
Those were good character requests. They get a flashback. But why is Briel's skin green. Oh and sorry for taking orion. i was just using constellations.
Briel's skin is green because his bey Green Libra caused an explotion that make him green forever.
Chapter 2-Briel
Me and Ethan were shocked after we beat those bladers. And it was our first bey battle! Then something weird happened. This guy with GREEN SKIN!!!!!! showed up. his name was Briel. He said, " Hey are you bladers?". We were so shocked, we fell of the bench. It turns out Briel was really nice. He had just moved to America from Spain. And his blade was wicked. " My bey Green Libra is extrordinary" said Briel. "You see, when I was six, there was a big explosion in my village. My father died in the explosion. Then I set out to travel the world. My bey then was very good. It was called Flame Libra.But I was a very weak blader. Then one day, I was walking in a village, when my bey disappeared. Suddenly, a bey fell out of the sky and hit me on the head. It was called Green Libra-" " Is that why you are obsessed with green?" asked Ethan It was obvious he liked green, because he was all the clothes he was wearing were green. Even his hair was green."yes" said briel and he continued," It turned out this bey was more powerful then Flame Libra. And it made me more powerful. Since then, I've never lost a bey battle." "Wow,that is cool", said Ethan. " Hey do you want to come over to my house?",Briel asked." Sure"we replied. Me and Ethan were going to spend the night there. Briel's mom was nice. After we met his mom, we started training. Briel ripped his bey first. Woah, he was stronger than me ethan combined by twice! His rip was accurate, his bey span fast, and he was skillful. I had a feeling Briel may be our new rival-friend. (end of chapter)
Chapter 3- Whirpool the Wonder
We awoke the next morning to the smell of pancakes. All of us ate the pancakes heartily. After the that we went to the park and sat down on a bench. I was wondering something. Why was Briel's skin green? So I asked him. He said, " One day Green Libra caused a huge explosion, that made everything green on my body." Then Ethan said," speaking about Green Libra, how about we bey battle?" "Sure," said Briel. So both of them took out their launchers and said, "3,2,1 GO SHOOT!". Briel's bey started spinning around the stadium at high speed. A tornado was created. Briel shouted, "Libra, Destruction Titan Typhoon!". But Ethan wasn't going to give up so easily. "Tsunami Minotaur! Counter Force Shield!". The attack was blocked. Suddenly, Green Libra started spinning slow in the center of the stadium. I knew Briel was trying to trick Ethan, but it was to late. Tsunami Minotaur attacked Green Libra. Libra jumped so it sent Minotaur out of the stadium. Then a bey came out of nowhere and started to spin a whirlpool. Then a boy, about 15, jumped out of nowhere. He caught his bey and so did Briel. Without a word he put up his launcher and ripped his bey, and so did Briel. The other guy's bey Whirlpool Poseidon started glowing. "Poseidon, Demolition Trident!". Green Libra was knocked out of the stadium. All of us were stunned except Briel and that teenager. Then Briel said " I'll explain later guys, i need to go with Whirlpool right now-" "They are coming with us" said Whirlpool. Without a word, we all headed toward a treehouse. (end of chapter)

Please make new characters! Thanks!
AL (Short for Alek)

Personality/Backstory; Cool calm and collected and not impressed easily. He is very sarcastic and he does not care what other people think only his point of view is important (for him). He talks to Whirlpool as if he know nothing and that he is worthless. His father taught him all about beyblades and beyblading, but suddenly his father disappeared. Rumours say that his father now, unwillingly, works for (what ever team or who ever is the bad guy/guys).

Occupation/What does he do; He can analyse beys and bey techniques through his notebook with webcam. He has 2 laptops in the "treehouse" and he is a friend of Whirlpool.

Beyblade; He has a beyblade called Phase Jikan (pronounced, Jy-ckan) which is Time in Japanese. He rarely uses his beyblade and so most people underestimate him which is an utter mistake. His special move is; Dimensional Shift where Jikan stops the opposing bey from moving (still spinning). But Jikan will need to stop eventually. Jikan can at least use the move 3 times and the more time the bey is "rested" (between the moves) the more time it gets to perform the move.

Other; Whirlpool, AL, and Briel have been friends or at least known each other for a long time. He is secretly looking for his father. Whirlpool calls him his full first name which is Alek-Sandro to wind him up.

That's it...
Hope you include AL
AL has a long black leather jacket which conceals most of his body. His jacket covers his face up-to his nose. He has blue jeans that are ripped. He has extreamly dark brown eyes and a digital watch on his left arm.
AL is 14.
Nat (Short for Natalie)

Personality/Backstory; A 13 (and a half) girl who is a tomboyish, silent but deadly type. She needs her privacy, anyone spying on her WILL feel her wrath. She goes to a boarding school (where-ever this story is set) but originally English (from the United Kingdom). Her parents are back in the UK, but they are to busy to contact her. She also has an Japanese father.

Occupation/What does she do; Nat is in an opposing team. She is one of the few that had challenged Al and underestimated him bringing Al to use his bey against her in a match that nobody else knew about. After their battle she has always had this budding crush on Al. And she is annoyed that Al never notices her subtle hints.

Beyblade; She has the beyblade Destiny Enjeru which is capable of controlling the heavenly statues fog, clouds and light.

Clothing; Nat has army (blue and grey) jeans which are worn out, she also has a matching jumper. She wears a white shirt underneath that is obviously to small for her (waist is visible) but is normally cover by her half zipped army jumper.
Chapter 5- The Bad Demon Bladers
We continued to follow Whirlpool. I noticed he didn't talk much. Anyways, we climbed up the tree and into the house. In the treehouse were two other people. They both seemed to be boys. "Elliot, Ethan, these are top class bladers. Their names are Nat-" "And Alek-Sandro." finished Whirlpool. It was the first time I had heard him talk. "What does Nat stand for?" asked Ethan. "It's short for Natalie." The person replied. My mouth dropped open. That was a girl! Alek-Sandro seemed to be sulking in the corner. "So, Briel, why are we here with Alek-Sandro-" "Its Al!" Said the sulking boy. Briel said "Well, you see the World Championships are coming up. Me, Whirlpool, And Alek wanted to form a team. We called ourselves the Bad Demon Bladers. We had to go to London to register. Mr. Bradley, The administrator, said we could represent America on one condition- we had to have two more players. So, we came back to America with Nat. She is on the European team. She has to except our new bladers and reply back to Mr. Bradley. But Nat is our rival." "So what do we have to do to get on the team?" I asked. "Nat needs to check you blades," responded Briel. Ethan and I handed over the blades. Nat OKed us. We were officially apart of the Bad Demon Bladers!" (End of chapter) Thanks to brielyranger and alek789 for characters!
Oh and I don't think i could put that Nat is in boarding school. It would not work out. Character requests were awesome. They live in California. (Read chapter 1)
Chapter 6- Next Stop- Kenya!
Alek used his computers in the treehouse to book us tickets to Nairobi in Kenya. That's where the first part of the championships were going to take place. Alek also analyzed the African team. They were Akyew with Destruction Leone, Ghani with Force Leone, Jogi and Majestic Leone, and Mikel with Spike Leone. Mikel and Jogi were going to be a real threat. I just noticed Nat was still with us. She was staring Al. So I asked her,"What are you still doing here?". "I'm not leaving until I battle him." She was pointing at Al. "I accept, but I don't go easy on amateurs" he said. Nat seemed really disturbed by that comment. Nat took out her bey Destiny Enjeru and raced out the door. Al followed with his bey, Phase Jikan. All of us had packed, when Al and Nat came back. It didn't even look like they had bladed. They probably went out for lunch. Nat still seemed disturbed, but she seemed to stare at Al a lot. Nat packed up her bags and left. I had a feeling we would see her again. Meanwhile, Alek,Briel,Ethan,Whirlpool, and me headed toward the airport, boarded the plane, and arrived the next day. We would meet our coach, and the President of the American Association of Beyblading. We arrived at the hotel called the Lazy Giraffe. We had a meal of a flatbread called naan, and spicy goat meat with cheese and soda. We went to our room where we found the president, Jack Johnson. He showed us our new coach. When we saw him, I was shocked.(end of chapter)
Love your storyStupid
ive got a character
name: Joseph
Bey: Manslayer Batousai SA(Sword Attack)145F
SA145 is like horns but with 4 free spinning blades for upper attacks
bio: Good kid. mainly wears black and red. Pretends to be bad, but at heart he's good. Loves his friends and his bey.
I'll put your character in, but he won't come until after Kenya. He's going to be leader of the Brazilian team.
hope you like him!
Name: David Guizelle
Bey: Deadly LeoneH145MS
Speacial moveUnhappychange it if you want to) Leone Tearing claw
Personality: Kind of quiet, really good blader, can be pretty funny if he wants to.

Anyways, not good with speacial move names
Chapter 7- Roger
I couldn't believe my eyes. Our new coach was Roger Wagner! He was the youngest blader to make it to the World Championships finals, but he lost. He was only Six years old then! Now he's probably around 42. His bey is Basalt Horseus. Everybody looked surprised except Whirlpool. Instead he said "You are late". Roger replied "I'm sorry my son." All of us except Alek almost fainted. Whirlpool was Roger Wagner's son! He was nice and modest, but strict. We did 50 chin-ups, 1,000 push ups, 1,000 sit ups, ran twenty miles, lifted 100 pound weights 20 times, and ran on a treadmill for an hour. At last our first round match came. We were against the Blue Kiwis of New Zealand. We sent up Ethan. They sent up Jacob with Storm Falcon. After the count down both beys were in the stadium. Jacob wasted no time. "Sky Thunder Attaaack!" For some reason he missed, but it seemed hard to miss. Before you could say pie, Jacob's bey came out of the beystadium and sent Ethan's bey flying out of the stadium. If I lose the next match, we're out of the tournament. I was facing against Nellie. She had Rock Pegasus. We launched our beys into the stadium and Nellie's bey went straight ahead to try to make a head on attack. Her mistake. I dodged, and her bey crashed into a podium outside the stadium. We were still in the game. We sent up Briel. The battle ended in two seconds flat. We had advanced to the quarterfinals! (End of chapter) Storm Dranzer, I'll tell you what i think of your character at karate!
(Jan. 26, 2011  11:54 PM)masamuneunicorn Wrote: Chapter One
It was just like another day stuck in school, bored to death, and the teacher had assigned us tons of homework. I wish i could escape to the beystadium. My beyblade Adrenaline Orion ED145PD. The pd stands for Platinum Defense. I found on my bed a week ago. I have no idea who its from. And i've never even got the time to test it out. Oh, yeah i forgot to introduce myself. I'm Elliot Craig. I have a brother named Ethan Strine. he is adopted. His bey is Tsunami Minotaur ED145. Ethan is like a best friend to me. He came from conneticut. I live in California,USA. Anyways, the bell had just rang. Me and Ethan ran out of school. Then we got confronted. The first one said "Give me all your points, or I'll crush your blades!". "Yeah!" said the second one. Without a word, we all took out our beys. " 3,2,1 go shoot!". Their beys were Attack types and span around the stadium at high speed. Ours were defense types. We had the advantage and knew it. We wanted to test our true strength. but suddenly, I lost control of my speech. So did Ethan. We both said "Gemini Hero Attack!". There was a huge explosion. once the smoke cleared i could see who had won. the two bullies blades had stopped spinning. Me and Ethan's blades were still spinning. I knew this was the start of something new. (Chapter 1 finished)

Please make character requests. Thanks!
No......it can't be.....connecticuit? Ethan?............did you use my character? It's ok if you did I just wanna know!
P.S.
Deadly wheel is defensive on one side and the other side is covered with spikes.
Deadly wheel awesome. Sparta i think it is just a coincidence. i got the idea of Ethan from my best friend's name. I don't were i got conneticut from.
Chapter 8- The Fierce Lions
After our match we were all pooped. Even Roger was. So, while Roger took a nap, we went to explore Nairobi. We had lunch and went to the park, when I noticed Briel was gone. We all freaked out. Then i told the rest of the team to calm down. We decided to split up. Each of us took walkie-talkies. I went down the road. That's when i heard the sound of beyblades. I decided to contact them, but right when i was about to talk to Whirlpool when i blacked out....... I felt a net around me. That was probably, because i was in a net. So was Alek, Briel, and Ethan. I saw a few people around me they were all dressed in normal lion skin except one. I'm guessing it was Akyew, because he had on a bronze lion skin. He said "Attack!" The others ripped their blades. There were around 50 people so we were doomed. Right when we were about to be toast, a bey came and saved us. The other beyblades stopped spinning. When i saw who it was i was shocked. So was Akyew. It was Whirlpool. "You fool! I will make you pay with a bey battle!" said Akyew angrily."Amateur" muttered Whirlpool. They launched their beys in to a pot thrown on the ground "Poseidon, Destruction Whirlpool!" shouted Whirlpool. When the attack was finished, you could see Akyew's beyblade out of the stadium. "That's what you get for messing with the Bad Demon Bladers!" we all said. "The Bad Demon Bladers? Wait that means your not the people who ambushed our HQ yesterday. Oh my gosh I'm so sorry. How about i treat you to lunch as an apology. After all I am Akyew of the Fierce Lions" Said Akyew. A friendship had begun with a rival. (end of chapter) Check out my website http://www.ewok.shutterfly.com please!
(Feb. 02, 2011  11:33 PM)masamuneunicorn Wrote: Deadly wheel awesome. Sparta i think it is just a coincidence. i got the idea of Ethan from my best friend's name. I don't were i got conneticut from.
so did my guy make it?
Yah, but he will be in it later. I already made the African team, so I won't make the Brazilian team until later. David will be somwhere around chapter 10.
Chapter 9- Quarterfinals Canceled
After Akyew and us had lunch, we went to the stadium to play in the quarterfinals. The Fierce Lions finished their match in two minutes! It was basically Them ripping their beys then the Fierce Lions blades knocked the others out of the stadium. Our match was about to start. Alek handed me a new blade. It was called Adrenaline Orion JH145MB. The MB stands for Marble Ball. The JH145 stand for Jet Helium. It has a lightweight electronic battery which makes the beyblade hover in air. It is could for ariel attacks, but is an easy target. It also has a metal face. But as soon as i went up to the dish ,8 helicopters were in the air . 8 bladers jumped out. There was a big explosion and I blacked out...... I felt concrete. My back was aching. My head was hurting. I was in rags and was hot and sweaty. My left leg,arm, and ankle were broken. Blood was gushing out from my arm, knee, and foot. I had bruises on my back and face. All the bladers were in the same state as I was including the Fierce Lions. The spectators were dead. Ghani said there was a WBBA headquarters in north of Nairobi. So we walked. It took us 5 days to get there. Our opponents we were about to face in that match were dead. So were the Fierce Lion's oponents. But Roger was still here. We were starved, exhausted, and sick. We all collapsed on the outskirts of north Nairobi..... We awoke in the hospital.We were all in the same ward. All of our blades had survived without damage. It was amazing. The tounament was closed until we healed and the town was rebuilt. All I wanted to know was who the bladers were and why did they destroy our town?
hey, can anyone help me with my story "the legend"? I need a few characters.
You don't even have to ask.


OF COURSE IT IS ACCEPTED!!!!!!!!!!!!
Everybody has stopped posting on this! its driving me nuts!!!!!