Dark Knight Dragooon LW160BSF Draft

I made edits to make this grammatically correct:


While Dark Knight and LW160 do not provide much use, Dark Knight Dragooon contains two very useful parts, Dragooon and BSF. While it is best as a spin equalizing Chrome Wheel, Dragooon's heavy weight and capability for left rotation make it one of, if not the best, Chrome Wheel in Zero-G. Its amazing versatility and use in all categories of customization also make it a very reliable part in tournaments. BSF is a very good part for resisting Zero-G Attacks in a Zero-G Stadium and for Balance in the BB-10. Therefore, '''this Bey is a must-have for all Bladers, and an excellent addition to any collection.'''

Hows this? Also, sorry for missing a few responses. When ShinobuXD replied, it made a new page and I he was the only one to reply again.
Anyone have any other suggestions? I don't think anyone noticed that I repliedXD.
A few things:

1) You can't really call the Zero G attack one a niche custom. Or even a custom really. There's no section of the "combo" that has one specific part (except for dragooon which isn't really the part that makes the combo) so its more a selection of combos.
2) What's up with the bit in brackets in the BSF section?
3) The combos need a lot more description. All you've done for most of them is state the combo and it's type.
(Apr. 16, 2013  8:46 PM)Ultra Wrote: A few things:

1) You can't really call the Zero G attack one a niche custom. Or even a custom really. There's no section of the "combo" that has one specific part (except for dragooon which isn't really the part that makes the combo) so its more a selection of combos.
2) What's up with the bit in brackets in the BSF section?
3) Explain why the combos suggested for BSF are good. You've basically just stated the combo.

Apart from that it seems good.

1: Should I take the combo out then? Are there any other combos that need added?
2: The word attack is bracketed so when its on Beywiki, it can link to the attack article.
3: I will do that. I will put the edited one on the OP.

EDIT: Finished. I need some elaboration on the first thing before I change it, though.
What I meant is that you need to change the wording since there's no specific combo there. Might be. I'll look tomorrow when I have time. I know how beywiki works man. I meant the large section in brackets to do with font size wiki coding that clearly shouldn't be there.
You forgot the third "O" in the word Dragooon; in the first sentence word of the Chrome Wheel section.
Ultra, about the brackets thing - :

==Bottom: Blade Semi Flat==
{| class="wikitable"
|<font size="1"><b>Weight:</b></font>
|<font size="1">1.19 gram</font>
|<font size="1"><b>Full Width:</b></font>
|<font size="1">19.70 mm</font>
|<font size="1"><b>Inner Blade Width:</b></font>
|<font size="1">16.04 mm</font>
|<font size="1"><b>Tip Width:</b></font>
|<font size="1">5.50 mm</font>
|<font size="1"><b>Flat Tip Width:</b></font>
|<font size="1">2.66 mm</font>
|<font size="1"><b>Full Height:</b></font>
|<font size="1">10.89 mm</font>
|<font size="1"><b>Tip Height:</b></font>
|<font size="1">7.48 mm</font>
|}


Are these what your talking about? The things in bold?
Yes that's what I was referring to.
I have no idea how those got there, but I removed them. As for the Dragooon combo, the person who orginally made it (It was Dragooon^2 LW160CF) intended for it to be a balance combo, meant to outspin other Beys instead of KO them. I've made according edits to the information on the combo.
Ok, this is looking to be nearly finished. Is there any other combos that should be added? Should I mention that Dragooon will be released by Hasbro and will apparently(based on videos) have a red Dark Knight?
Nothing is confirmed, so no.
Alright then. Are there any other Dragooon combos that need to be listed? Say, Bahamdia Dragooon?

EDIT: I made an edit to the BSF section. Should I include it?

Here it is:
While its tip is simply a slightly wider Semi Flat, it is mounted on an imposing base with a linear row of 8 blades facing left circling its circumference, as well as 8 ridges below them that circle the tip. The blades are shaped similarly to LW160's wings, however they are less spaced. This tip should not be used on [[Attack]] customs because of its lack of speed and mobility. Though it is possible that the blades help produce a downward force effect, they never make contact with the Stadium. Instead, the lower 8 ridges do, and while they do help the Bey regain balance, the effect they produce is negligible. This tip has proven to be very useful for Defense against Zero G Attacks. Beys using BSF are extremely difficult to sway out of the stadium, and the tip has the ability to wobble for extended periods of time and sometimes regain its balance, allowing it to outspin opponents. When used on a left-spinning Bey, it is even more difficult to sway out of the stadium. It also serves purpose in the BB-10. It can be used in semi-aggressive balance customs as well as wobbling combos. Overall, BSF is a very useful bottom for both the Zero G Stadium and the BB-10.
A few quick things I noticed....

I would change it in the beginning to say that Dragooon is the "only" left spin Zero G Chrome Wheel. Saying it is the first suggests there are others.

Separate "to" and "make" in the Synchromed with itself section, and change the title of that section to "When in Synchrom with itself"

In the Zero G Balance customs section opponents is spelled with an "i"

In the Overall section,

While Dark Knight and LW160 do not provide much use, Dark Knight Dragooon does contain two very useful parts, Dragooon and BSF. While it is best as a spin equalizing Chrome Wheel, Dragooon's heavy weight and capability for left rotation make it one of, if not the best, Chrome Wheels in Zero-G. Its amazing versatility and the fact it can be used in all categories of customization make it a very reliable competitive part. Also, BSF is a very good bottom for resisting Zero-G Attacks in a Zero-G Stadium and for Balance customizations in the BB-10. Therefore, '''this Bey is a must-have for all Bladers, and an excellent addition to any collection.'''


I changed that line about BSF because the other sounded a little repetitive.
I applied your changes. I believe I removed the right words from the Synchrom section. What do you think of my BSF section edit? Should I apply it?
I do like that edit for BSF better than the current one.
Ok, I applied a slightly edited revised BSF sectioned in the OP.
I made a grammar edit and changed all the uses of "Zero G" to "Zero-G".
I think you might want to explain a little why _______dragoon B:d is both useful as a spin-stealer and sway defense custom, just give like a few performance notes or something.
It's explained how "swaying" works at the "zero g attack" draft
Time, I added further description of how Dragooon BGrin wins its battles and I did so with some of the other combos in the draft. If this wasn't necessary, I will remove the added text in there.
SO, I am probably going to include the Dark Knight Dragoon measurements that were done as part of the measurements project, but I do not know how to insert this box. Can someone show me the text that needs to be typed in order to have it appear?
(May. 27, 2013  6:59 PM)UGottaCetus Wrote: SO, I am probably going to include the Dark Knight Dragoon measurements that were done as part of the measurements project, but I do not know how to insert this box. Can someone show me the text that needs to be typed in order to have it appear?

You could simply look at the code on any of the Beywiki Beyblade articles.
Ok, I will incorporate them very soon. However, the measurements were never done by another member so they are not quite "foolproof" yet. Should I still include them?
{| class="wikitable"
|<font size="1"><b>Full Width:</b></font>
|<font size="1">45 mm</font>
|<font size="1"><b>Full Height:</b></font>
|<font size="1">8 mm</font>
|}


^^I think I did this right. These are my measurements for Dragooon. I'm still not sure that these are correct, though. I will add them to the draft once I finish them all up.