Beyblade - Dragulus ((Beystory))

Poll: Should I Continue This ?

Yes, I would like to read more.
96.00%
24
No, i found it boring and crappy.
4.00%
1
Total: 100% 25 vote(s)
OK, this is not finished, but don't laugh, I just felt like I wanted to post this. I know it isn't good to any extent but i want feedback, mind you i wrote this months ago and i dont know whether to continue, should i?






Beyblade – Dragulus



Chapter 1 – The New Beyblade

Tyler was ecstatic; he’d just received his first blade. This was the day he longed for. He inserted his ripcord into his launcher and attached the blade to the launcher. “3, 2, 1 Let It Rip!” shouted David smiling at the expression on Tyler’s face as he pulled the ripcord with all his strength. Tyler was only 12, but nearly every year he watched the beyblading world championships on television, every weekend he went out to the park to see other blader’s battling ferociously. The blade David had given Tyler was a blade called Storm Dragulus, a stamina type blade. As soon as Tyler had pulled the ripcord he felt he was a true blader, he watched the blades smash and crash into each other with tremendous force. David’s blade was Flame Magmon, an attack type blade. Tyler and David watched over the stadium in awe as the two beyblades collided in battle. The battle lasted a few minutes until Tyler’s blade came to a halt. “Good battle Tyler, your blade has potential” said David grinning at the outcome of the battle.



“So David, can you show me some tips? I want to know some techniques!” asked Tyler cheerfully. David picked up his beyblade and attached it to his launcher. “Well Tyler, the best technique I know is to look for your enemy’s weakness and use it to your advantage” replied David. “So you mean if I was fighting an attack type I could dodge its attacks until it spun out?” said Tyler. “Yeh, like that sort of thing. Well, I’m going home now; I guess I’ll see you tomorrow”. David started to walk home so Tyler packed up his belongings and left the park. He held the blade tightly in his palm as he cared for it dearly. The streets of London were vandalized and filled with rubbish, it wasn’t the prettiest of places to be, there were binbags scattered along the floor, shopping backs were mindlessly floating around the floor with no intention. Suddenly Tyler heard a loud shouting voice. “OI! YOU THERE BRAT” said a voice coming from behind Tyler. Tyler turned around to see who it was. It was a tall man in his twenties, wearing a ripped denim jacket, a pair of loose brown shorts that were obviously too big for him and a red bandana. “Heh, what’s that in your hand? A beyblade? PAH! I’ll show you how strong you need to be a blader!” screamed the man. Suddenly two large men came out from behind him and placed a bag over his head. Tyler couldn’t hear what was going on, all he heard was voices of people laughing and cackling at each other. Before he knew it Tyler was dumped onto the hard, stony floor and the bag was removed from his head, the fall had given him a big graze down his leg. Tyler looked up and saw one of the men leaning over a beyblade stadium. “Are you ready to feel the wrath of a true blader?” The man rustled inside his pocket and pulled out a blade, launcher and a ripcord. The blade was golden with red edges. Tyler was prompted to get out his blade to fight the man. He got his launcher and beyblade ready for the battle. There was no way out of this battle, and most unfortunately there was no way of winning it.



“ARE YOU READY?” shouted the large man in Tyler’s direction. “3, 2, 1 Let It Rip!” Tyler launched his beyblade into the arena; it circled the man’s blade continuously until the man’s blade went on the offense, pushing Tyler’s blade to the edge of the stadium. “Come on!” shouted Tyler towards Storm Dragulus. He had already lost his first battle so he didn’t want to lose again. The other two bladers readied their beyblades and launched them towards Storm Dragulus, it was caught in the centre of the 3 blades colliding and the fusion wheel cracked and his blade stopped spinning. Tyler fell to his knees as the men laughed at him. “You don’t earn the right to be a blader son, get some skill and then we shall fight like bladers!” One of the men stood on Tyler’s beyblade damaging it more than it already was. The men walked off cackling with laughter. Tyler picked up the smashed remains of his beyblade and stood up. To his knowledge the blade was beyond repairable. Tyler threw the remains of the blade onto the ground. “I’LL GET YOU SOME DAY! I WILL!” screamed Tyler with tears streaming down his distressed face. “You can only dream!” exclaimed one of the smug bladers, grinning morosely at Tyler.



After the men had walked off, Tyler ran home to avoid any more trouble. He hated London, he had never had good luck here and his family hadn’t too. When Tyler was a kid his first house in London burnt down so his parents only had the money to buy a cheap terraced house and it was in appalling condition, then when Tyler was 6 his dad left him and his mother and never came back. When Tyler was walking home he was only a few metres away from his house when suddenly a mysterious cloaked figure barged past him and dropped something. Tyler looked down and saw a blade lying on the floor. “Ahem, excuse me sir? You dropped something” Tyler told the mysterious figure. Tyler was ignored as the cloaked unknown walked onwards. Tyler leant down and picked up the blade. He was startled to find out it was a Dragulus blade! There was a piece of paper underneath the blade so Tyler picked it up. It read ‘Hello there Tyler, I have just came by to give you a little present, please keep this dear to you and be careful as this blade is extremely powerful. The blade in your hand right now is a Galaxy Dragulus, Signed K.’ Tyler was shocked as he wondered who this mysterious K person was. After receiving the blade Tyler ran back to the park to test his new blades skills. He launched it into the stadium with all his power. The blade flew off of the launcher with incredible speed and circled the arena multiple times. Tyler was astonished at the speed of the blade; it was like nothing he had seen before. It was even faster than any of the blades he had seen at the world championships! He picked up the blade and placed it in his pocket to avoid meeting any other bladers such as the three men he had encountered before. He left the park and ran to Haseo’s house. Haseo was the best blader around his area, and also Tyler’s best friend. Tyler knew that if he could beat Haseo then he surely had a chance to become famous! Haseo had been entered into the regional championships before but got beaten in the semi-finals. When Tyler arrived at Haseo’s house he was greeted to the door by Haseo’s mum. “Hello is Haseo in?” said Tyler shyly. “Yes he is, I’ll call him down now.” Before Haseo’s mum had to shout for him he was running down the stairs to greet Tyler. “Hi Tyler, why did you come here?” said Haseo excitedly. “Come outside, I want to show you something.” Tyler and Haseo sat on the ground as Tyler pulled out his Galaxy Dragulus from his pocket. “WOAH! Where did you get that?” whispered Haseo.



“I just found it on the street” said Tyler nervously. “Really? A blade like that on the street?” said Haseo shocked. “Well, not exactly, a man walked by my and dropped it” Haseo inspected the blade closer. “Did you not tell him he dropped it?” said Haseo worriedly. ”Well, yes but he ignored me, and it also had a note with my name on” Tyler handed Hasio the note carefully. Haseo skimmed through the note. “So, the blade is a Galaxy Dragulus? Never heard of it” Haseo handed the note back to Tyler. “Well, neither have I but it’s amazing, it’s the fastest blade I’ve ever seen, want to battle?” said Tyler confidently. “Sure, I’ve got my blade here, let’s go to the park!” Tyler and Haseo ran to the park, excited to see how strong the blade was. When they arrived at the stadium they readied up their blades for battle. “3, 2, 1 Let It Rip!” Tyler’s blade flew off of his launcher and landed in the middle of the stadium, then started circling the arena with high speed. Haseo was astonished as this was like no other blade he had seen before. Tyler felt the power of the blade running through him like he was totally in control. Haseo had combined many of the different blades he had to make an ultimate blade, but Tyler’s blade was a good match for it. Galaxy Dragulus dodged all of the incoming attacks from Haseo’s blade with great Speed. Haseo’s blade suddenly left a gap open by standing still and Tyler tried to take that gap and turn it into an advantage. “ATTACK” shouted Tyler at the top of his voice. The power had been building within Tyler and his blade and he channelled it through one single attack. The blade rotated faster than any blade before, it then created a field around itself with extreme power. Haseo’s blade got absorbed into the energy field and vanished. Tyler felt stronger than ever, but what he hadn’t seen was Haseo’s reaction. Hasio was sitting on the floor crying, as his strongest blade was gone, and the sad thing was Tyler didn’t even realise. Haseo had shouted for him to stop, but he could see the power in his eyes. This wasn’t the Tyler that Haseo knew. Suddenly Galaxy Dragulus came to a halt in the stadium, and all of the power that Tyler had felt had vanished, just like Haseo’s blade. “Wh…Where is your blade?” said Tyler looking uneasy. “YOU DESTROYED IT! YOUR BLADE DID! HOW COULD YOU!” screamed Haseo with tears streaming down his eyes. Tyler thought back to the moment when the three men had destroyed his blade, he was just like Hasio now. Tyler ran over to Haseo and pulled him up. “I couldn’t control myself Haseo, I swear I wouldn’t have done that” said Tyler starting to tear up.



Haseo admitted it; the Tyler he had once and always knew hadn’t been the Tyler he’d just fought with. “Your blade is too strong Tyler, you need to get rid of it, I’ll give you one my ones” pleaded Haseo. Tyler knew this was true, but somehow he couldn’t accept it. “I guess so.” Said Tyler. “Well, I think I’ll go home now, I’ve had enough for one day” Tyler started to walk home when suddenly Haseo tapped him on his shoulder. “I forgive you” said Haseo wiping the tears from off of his face. “Thanks, it means a lot to me.” Tyler said whilst smiling at Haseo. Tyler walked onwards and Haseo went back home. A lot had happened today that Tyler had to think about, this new beyblade had brought a lot of good things into his life, and a lot of bad things too. All Tyler knew was that he would get revenge of the three bladers, and become the World Championship Beyblade!





Chapter 2 – A New Beginning



It was a new day for Tyler; he had gone home to relax, with some time to think about what his next steps should be. Tyler’s favourite place to go and relax was the forest. Thankfully on this day it was dry, if not a little humid. The leaves crunched beneath his trainers and twigs cracked loudly under his step. Usually his shoes would sink in the mud which felt like walking on sponge. He was going to make the most of today and he had a feeling the day was going to make the most of him too. Tyler sat down beside one of the large trees and pulled his beyblade out of his trouser pocket. “What should I do with you…” whispered Tyler as he gazed at Galaxy Dragulus. It was hard to remember what had happened the past few days, but Tyler was glad since most of the memories hadn’t been good ones. Tyler stood up and started walking towards the WBBA Headquarters to see if he could use one of their special blade level stations to see how strong his blade really was. He arrived at the door and was amazed at the colossal size of the building and then walked inside. “Excuse me, this is private access only, please leave” exclaimed the Secretary. “Oh sorry, do you have one of those machines that can calculate a blades power?” said Tyler excitedly. “Well, it is private access to WBBA bladers but, if you don’t tell anyone I’ll let you in” whispered the Secretary. Tyler followed the woman through the building until they reached a large, metal door.



The woman typed in the security code and walked through. “Wow, this is amazing” said Tyler. “Yes, I hear that a lot. It’s just been upgraded too” Tyler walked down the stairs and placed his blade into the slot. “Ok, I can read your stats and if your blade is damaged, or could be upgraded in any way this will do the trick” said the secretary as she pulled the lever. The machine buzzed and hummed as tests were carried out. When the machine had stopped the screen read ‘Blade Attack - HIGH, Blade Defence - HIGH, Blade Stamina - MAX, Blade Condition - Worn, Blade Upgrade Available –Yes’. “Sorry, I don’t think the new upgrade is working, your stats can’t be that high” exclaimed the secretary. “No, I believe they are correct, now can I upgrade my blade?” said Tyler happily.



“Your stats could never be that high, they are the same stats as a world champion, but if you insist I‘ll see what upgrades can be made” said the woman angrily. She pulled the lever again and the machine set off, it only took a few minutes for the machine to fix up Tyler’s blade when the stats suddenly popped up on the screen. It read ‘Blade Attack – MAX, Blade Defence - MAX, Blade Stamina – MAX, Blade Condition – Excellent, Blade Upgrade Complete’. “What? That’s impossible! No one’s blade could possibly be that strong! I will have to tell the boss, he will want to see you” shouted the woman whilst she ran off. Tyler smirked as the machine had proved his blades strength. Tyler was leaving the room when suddenly he bumped into a tall man. “So you must be this Tyler I’ve just been told about, could you please show me your blade?” Tyler showed the man Dragulus and he was shocked. “I believe that is the legendary blade Galaxy Dragulus, how did you come to obtain such a thing?” exclaimed the man. “Well, I won’t go into detail but it was a present from someone” said Tyler whilst chuckling. “Well, that doesn’t matter much, but now we need to find out if you possess any potential as a blader, please follow me to the battle room”



Tyler followed the man into the battle room and went to sit in one of the seats. “Don’t sit down, we need you to battle” alerted the man. Tyler walked over the stadium and got out his beyblade. “Your first opponent will be Chygrovski Faddell!” announced the man. Suddenly the buzzing sound of a machine started and a character appeared on the opposite side of the stadium. Tyler was shocked, he recognised this man. “Tyler! Remember me? My leader beat you a little while ago! Do not worry though, you will meet him soon! Hahaha!” said Chygrovski. That was it! He was one of the mysterious three bladers that he had met when he had gotten his first beyblade. “I remember you! You were the one who stood on my beyblade!” shouted Tyler. “Oh yes, what a shame, now instead of crushing your beyblade I will crush you!” said Chygrovski. “3, 2, 1, Let It Rip!” Tyler pulled his ripcord with immense strength and it flew into the stadium. Chygrovski’s blade was Dark Boarus, a balance type blade. Tyler could already feel the power building up within him but he tried to ignore it and attack normally. Dark Boarus and Galaxy Dragulus collided in the stadium with tremendous force. “Haha! You have improved, but not enough!” Dark Boarus went on the offense and started smashing into Galaxy Dragulus with brute strength. “Haha! You are nowhere near strong enough to face me or my boss!” exclaimed Chygrovski. Suddenly it hit Tyler, he was extremely powerful, but by holding back and not using his special attacks he couldn’t release his full potential and beat the hardest of enemies. Tyler’s only chance of getting back into the fight was by using his special attacks. “SPECIAL ATTACK DRAGULUS! COMET DRAGON BLAST!” Galaxy Dragulus flew up into the air and touched the roof. “What? How did you do that!” exclaimed Chygrovski. “Well, I’ve improved a lot since I met you last, and I’ve gained a lot more power! GO DRAGULUS!” Galaxy Dragulus came soaring down from the roof and collided into Dark Boarus with great power and speed. Chygrovski was stunned by this sudden attack. His beyblade fell beside him as he looked in awe at Tyler.

“What just happened? No beyblade can possess such strength!” said Chygrovski. “Ev… Even if you can beat me you can’t possibly beat the rest of us!” Tyler picked up Galaxy Dragulus from the beyblade stadium. “I can only dream” said Tyler whilst smirking. “OK! You’re next two opponents Kevin Gallant and the number one regional champion Kai Macedon!” Bright lights started flashing in front of Tyler and suddenly he was surrounded by a a full audience a beyblading fans. From the opposite side of the room Kevin and Kai emerged from one of the gates. “Long time no see little boy! I knew you would be ready some day!” Shouted Kai. “I swore revenge on you that day, and today I will get it!” exclaimed Tyler.



Tyler, Kai and Kevin readied up their beyblade’s for battle “Are you ready? 3, 2, 1 Let It…” Suddenly there was a large crash through the ceiling. A helicopter appeared from the sky and hovered over the stadium. The helicopters door opened and a figure appeared to be leaning out. The figure was wearing a black suit and a red stripy tie that hung neatly around his neck. “Hello there bladers! That last battle was great!” shouted the figure from above.” I’ve never seen such skill from a blader, Tyler.” Said the mysterious figure. “How do you know my name?” asked Tyler. “That doesn’t really matter now does it? Anyways i think it is the perfect time to announce that tomorrow, in the plaza there will be a tourney held there for bladers such as yourselves” Tyler looked up at the figure in the helicopter. “What do you mean like us?” shouted Tyler. The figure laughed. “It’s pretty simple really, just come along. I’ll be waiting for you!” The helicopter rose back into the sky and flew off. Tyler recognised the man, as if he was of some importance to him. Tyler was suddenly startled as Kai started screaming loudly at Tyler. “Ok! Let’s continue with the battle! I want to beat you again!” said Kai confidently. “3, 2, 1 Let It Rip!” All three blades landed directly in the centre of the stadium and collided. “I see you can keep up with us Tyler!” said Kevin. “I can do much more than that! Go Dragulus Space Collision!” Galaxy Dragulus flew up into the air and then fell directly towards Kevin’s blade with great momentum. “I don’t go down that easily!” said Kevin whilst trying to avoid Tyler’s attack. Kevin’s blade was a special defence type blade called Sea Gyranus. Suddenly Sea Gyranus moved out of the way of Galaxy Dragulus’ attack and it slammed into the stadium. Kai’s blade came up from behind Galaxy Dragulus and got a few powerful attacks in. Kai’s blade was an Attack type blade called Rock Bearal; it has a high attack rate but an extremely low stamina rate. Tyler knew that if he wanted to win this fight he needed to use his special move before he lost too much stamina.



Suddenly Tyler saw an opening and made his move. “GO DRAGULUS! EXPLODING BLACK HOLE!” shouted Tyler. Suddenly Dragulus jumped up into the air and readied its self for its special move when Kai’s blade followed it. “COME ON BEARAL! INFINITY CLAW SLASH!” screamed Kai towards his beyblade. Kai’s blade collided into Galaxy Dragulus and knocked it off balance, causing Galaxy Dragulus’ special attack to stop. Galaxy Dragulus started heading towards the stadium whilst rapidly being attacked. “Go Gyranus! Tsunami Power Strike!” shouted Kevin. Galaxy Dragulus was plummeting towards the stadium at great speed with Rock Bearal following closely behind it, and Sea Gyranus was flying upwards with great momentum. Tyler thought he couldn’t win until suddenly he saw it. “Dodge him Dragulus!” Suddenly Galaxy Dragulus gained balance again and moved to the right. Kai and Kevin’s blades collided with great power and a shockwave rippled through the stadium. “Wha?!” shouted Kai in amazement. “What just happened?” The shockwave vanished and Kai and Kevin’s blades were lying in the middle of the stadium motionless. “It’s a tie!” shouted Kevin. “I think you have miscalculated that, look over there!” said Tyler whilst pointing over to the edge of the stadium. Galaxy Dragulus was right at the edge of the stadium still spinning well. “It seems we have a winner, well done Tyler. You have proved to me a lot by winning here today” said the Boss as he walked over to Tyler. “That’s unfair! How did he do that?” shouted Kai to the Boss. “He noticed an opening and used it to his advantage, what seems like a disadvantage is generally an advantage but you just don’t know it” Tyler picked up Galaxy Dragulus and smiled. “I’m finally getting the hang of you” whispered Tyler to himself. The boss started walking away then suddenly turned around and looked at Tyler. “Oh and before I go, come to my house tonight and I will treat you to a banquet as a congratulations, I need to discuss things with you.” announced the boss. “Will do” replied Tyler.



Chapter 3 – Smells like Victory



Tyler was astounded; he had never seen such a place. Chandeliers hung from the ceiling, made from gold, colossal doors surrounded him in every direction. “This guy must be loaded.” Said Tyler under his breath. Suddenly a door opened and a servant popped his head through. “Excuse me sir, Daedalus wants to see you” said the Servant. “Who is Daedalus?” said Tyler. “Daedalus is the WBBO Boss” said the servant. “Oh, ok then” Tyler followed the servant through the passages and hallways until they came to a large room filled by a table. “Ah! Tyler, let’s eat!” said Daedalus. Tyler sat down in one of the gold plated seats and placed a napkin on his lap. “So, your performance in the battle room was amazing, how did you come to obtain such power?” said Daedalus. “Well, It’s a long story, but I didn’t really obtain the power, the power obtained me” said Tyler. Daedalus pulled a funny look at Tyler. “By that I’m guessing you mean that the blade you own made you this strong?” said Daedalus. “Yeh, that” Daedalus picked up some food from one of the plates. “Go on, have some, my servants went through a lot to make this” said Daedalus sarcastically. Tyler picked up a bit of chicken and started gnawing on it. “So Tyler, got any relatives or friends who beyblade?” said Daedalus. “Well, a lot of my friends battle with beyblades and my mum said my dad used to be a champion beyblader before he left us” said Tyler. “What was his name?” asked Daedalus. “Kugan” replied Tyler. “You’re kidding me? Your father was Kugan?” said Daedalus. “You knew him?” exclaimed Tyler.



“Why yes, he was like a best friend to me, he was one of the best bladers I’ve ever seen, now that I think of it you remind me of him a lot” said Daedalus gazing towards Tyler. “Do you know what happened to him?” asked Tyler. “No, one day he was the world champion, the next he had vanished with no trail” said Daedalus. “Strange…” replied Tyler. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. “Hello Daedalus? May I come in?” said a voice from behind the door. “Yes, come take a seat!” replied Daedalus. The door opened and a young girl entered the room. Tyler felt the drool dribbling down his mouth so he wiped it onto his sleeve. “Say hello to my top student Tyler!” said Daedalus happily. “H... He… Hey.” Stuttered Tyler. “Hi, my name is Holly, I’ve heard about you” said Holly. “The reason Holly is here is I want you two to go to that tournament in the plaza tomorrow, I suspect something fishy is going on.” said Daedalus. “So I’m working for the WBBA now?” asked Tyler. “I suppose you could say that” answered Daedalus. “Well, I’ll head home, I’ll come back in the morning for the tournament” said Tyler whilst getting out of his seat. “Oh! There is no need, I have already arranged with your mother for you to stay here tonight and train! I’m sure you are ok with that?” said Daedalus. “Oh... Yeh, so where am I staying?” asked Tyler “I’m sure there’s a spare room around somewhere, Holly is staying too. I want you two to get some practice for tomorrow, if something is up you must be in top shape” replied Daedalus. “So Tyler, I’m sure I can beat you, want to start practicing?” asked Holly with a grin on her face. “Erm.. Ok..” said Tyler. Holly turned around and walked towards the door, Tyler started to follow her until he was interrupted. “Oh, and before you leave Tyler.......

(THE END, or is it?)

ADDED CUSTOM CHARACTERS

Haseo - Tylers Best Friend - koyoya6543
Character Request Template (NOT NEEDED ATM) (Click to View)
this is a good story,keep it up!
(Apr. 09, 2011  11:24 AM)Ventus98 Wrote: this is a good story,keep it up!

Thanks, good to know.
I want to read all of it!Great Story!!!!!!
I thought i might as well finish the battle bit off seeing as you said it was ok.

PILOT CHAPTER - PART 2

“ARE YOU READY?” Shouted the large man in Tyler’s direction. “3, 2, 1 Let It Rip!” Tyler launched his beyblade into the arena; it circled the man’s blade for a few seconds until it suddenly launched an all-out attack on Tyler’s blade smashing it into pieces. Tyler fell to his knees as the men laughed at him. “You don’t earn the right to be a blader son, get some skill and then we shall fight like bladers!” One of the men stood on Tyler’s beyblade damaging it more than it already was. Then men walked off cackling with laughter. Tyler’s picked up the smashed pieces of beyblade and stood up. The blade was beyond repairable. Tyler chucked the remains of the blade onto the ground. “ILL GET YOU SOME DAY! I WILL!” screamed Tyler with tears streaming down his face. “You can only dream!” said one of the men turning around with a grin on his face.
(Apr. 09, 2011  11:38 AM)koyoya6543 Wrote: I want to read all of it!Great Story!!!!!!

thanks Grin
I'll do some Character Requests!And the story is very mysterious,exciting and mysterious.
I'm also writing a story.The chapters are very long!!!!!!And the name is "Darkness".
(Apr. 09, 2011  11:42 AM)koyoya6543 Wrote: I'll do some Character Requests!And the story is very mysterious,exciting and mysterious.
I'm also writing a story.The chapters are very long!!!!!!And the name is "Darkness".

Cool, ill add a basic outline for what i want from character requests.
Ok!!!!!!Just PM me if you want character requests!
heres 4 characters for your AWESOME story


Name: Izuma Inzori
Name: Sonai Inzori
Name: Hatachi Inzori
Name: Rez Inzori
Will Tyler's bey ever get fixed? Add will he meet Gingka,Kenta,Koyoya,Madoka,And Benki?
(Apr. 09, 2011  12:00 PM)Dracovianauis Wrote: heres 4 characters for your AWESOME story


Name: Izuma Inzori
Name: Sonai Inzori
Name: Hatachi Inzori
Name: Rez Inzori

WOW Grin They should help fill a gap.
(Apr. 09, 2011  12:05 PM)koyoya6543 Wrote: Will Tyler's bey ever get fixed? Add will he meet Gingka,Kenta,Koyoya,Madoka,And Benki?

Dont worry, ive got a good plan about his blade Wink and i dont know, i was querying about adding original mfb characters.
Hey,this story is kinda good.
however my eyes are paralyzed after reading this story because the words sticks together like glue.
You read my story before right?
You can perform the same way,
that the letters will not stick together.
(Apr. 09, 2011  12:22 PM)Meteo LDrago Wrote: Hey,this story is kinda good.
however my eyes are paralyzed after reading this story because the words sticks together like glue.
You read my story before right?
You can perform the same way,
that the letters will not stick together.

Well, thanks. Ill try and see if i can adapt on the writing style. Im used to writing like that though Grin
Ok guys, felt like posting the third bit of the pilot now, ill probably release 5 bits of the pilot all together and this is the third. If the response from the full pilot goes well then i will continue on!

PILOT CHAPTER - PART 3

After the men had walked off Tyler ran home to avoid any more trouble. He was only a few metres away from his house when suddenly a cloaked man walked in front of him and dropped something. The man hadn’t noticed he’d dropped anything. Tyler looked down and saw a blade lying on the floor. “Ahem, excuse me sir. You have dropped something” said Tyler to the mysterious man. The man ignored Tyler and walked onwards. Tyler leant down and picked up the blade. He was startled to find out it was a Dragulus blade! There was a piece of paper underneath the blade so Tyler picked it up. It read ‘Hello there Tyler, I have just came by to give you a little present, please keep this dear to you and be careful as this blade is extremely powerful. The blade in your hand right now is a Galaxy Dragulus.’ Tyler was shocked as he wondered who could have possibly given him the blade. After receiving the blade Tyler ran back to the park to test his new blades skills. He launched it into the stadium with all his power. The blade flew off of the launcher with incredible speed and circled the arena multiple times. Tyler was astonished at the speed of the blade; it was like nothing he had seen before. It was even faster than any of the blades he had seen at the world championships! He picked up the blade and placed it in his pocket to avoid meeting any other bladers such as the three men he had encountered before. He left the park and ran to Haseo’s house. Haseo was the best blader around his area, and also Tyler’s best friend. Tyler knew that if he could beat Haseo then he surely had a chance to become famous! Haseo had been entered into the regional championships before but got beaten in the semi-finals. When Tyler arrived at Haseo’s house he was greeted to the door by Haseo’s mum. “Hello is Haseo in?” said Tyler shyly. “Yes he is, I’ll call him down now.” Before Haseo’s mum had to shout for him he was running down the stairs to greet Tyler. “Hi Tyler, why did you come here?” said Haseo excitedly. “Come outside, I want to show you something.” Tyler and Haseo sat on the ground as Tyler pulled out his Galaxy Dragulus from his pocket. “WOAH! Where did you get that?” whispered Haseo.
here is part 4 of the pilot! One part to go ;D

PILOT CHAPTER - PART 4

“I just found it on the street” said Tyler nervously. “Really? A blade like that on the street?” said Haseo shocked. “Well, not exactly, a man walked by my and dropped it” Haseo inspected the blade closer. “Did you not tell him he dropped it?” said Haseo worriedly. ”Well, yes but he ignored me, and it also had a note with my name on” Tyler handed Hasio the note carefully. Haseo skimmed through the note. “So, the blade is a Galaxy Dragulus? Never heard of it” Haseo handed the note back to Tyler. “Well, neither have I but it’s amazing, it’s the fastest blade I’ve ever seen, want to battle?” said Tyler confidently. “Sure, I’ve got my blade here, let’s go to the park!” Tyler and Hasio ran to the park, excited to see how strong the blade was. When they arrived at the stadium they readied up their blades for battle. “3, 2, 1 Let It Rip!” Tyler’s blade flew off of his launcher and landed in the middle of the stadium, then started circling the arena with high speed. Hasio was astonished as this was like no other blade he had seen before. Tyler felt the power of the blade running through him like he was totally in control. Hasio had combined many of the different blades he had to make an ultimate blade, but Tyler’s blade was a good match for it. Galaxy Dragulus dodged all of the incoming attacks from Hasio’s blade with great Speed. “ATTACK” shouted Tyler at the top of his voice. The power had been building within Tyler and his blade and he channelled it through one single attack. The blade rotated faster than any blade before, it then created a field around itself with extreme power. Hasio’s blade got absorbed into the energy field and vanished. Tyler felt stronger than ever, but what he hadn’t seen was Hasio’s reaction. Hasio was sitting on the floor crying, as his strongest blade was gone, and the sad thing was Tyler didn’t even realise. Hasio had shouted for him to stop, but he could see the power in his eyes. This wasn’t the Tyler that Hasio knew. Suddenly Galaxy Dragulus came to a halt in the stadium, and all of the power that Tyler had felt had vanished, just like Hasio’s blade. “Wh…Where is your blade?” said Tyler looking uneasy. “YOU DESTROYED IT! YOUR BLADE DID! HOW COULD YOU!” screamed Hasio with tears streaming down his eyes. Tyler thought back to the moment when the three men had destroyed his blade, he was just like Hasio now. Tyler ran over to Hasio and pulled him up. “I couldn’t control myself Hasio, I swear I wouldn’t have done that” said Tyler starting to tear up.
Last but not least! Part 5 of my story chapter, sorry for the delay as i was out today. If you liked this just vote on the poll, or reply with any tips!

PILOT CHAPTER - PART 5

Haseo admitted it; the Tyler he had once and always knew hadn’t been the Tyler he’d just fought with. “Your blade is too strong Tyler, you need to get rid of it, I’ll give you one my ones” pleaded Haseo. Tyler knew this was true, but somehow he couldn’t accept it. “I guess so.” said Tyler. “Well, I think I’ll go home now, I’ve had enough for one day” Tyler started to walk home when suddenly Haseo tapped him on his shoulder. “I forgive you” said Haseo wiping the tears from off of his face. “Thanks, it means a lot to me.” Tyler said whilst smiling at Haseo. Tyler walked onwards and Haseo went back home. A lot had happened today that Tyler had to think about, this new beyblade had brought a lot of good things into his life, and a lot of bad things too. All Tyler knew was that he would get revenge of the three bladers, and become the World Championship Beyblader!
Woah guys, bump because noone but me posting xD
(Apr. 09, 2011  11:42 PM)koyoya6543 Wrote: Nice!!!!!

thanks, so should i continue this?
Here is my request if you still taking them
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(Apr. 10, 2011  8:55 AM)Beaul83 Wrote: Here is my request if you still taking them
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Yeh, still taking requests. i need 4 now.
Continue the story,and please make Haseo and Tyler blade together as a team!
(Apr. 10, 2011  3:13 PM)koyoya6543 Wrote: Continue the story,and please make Haseo and Tyler blade together as a team!

Ok then, ill work something out for that. Ill start writing chapter 2 now.
Theblayder, will my characters appear? and in what chapter?
(Apr. 10, 2011  4:35 PM)Dracovianauis Wrote: Theblayder, will my characters appear? and in what chapter?

Erm, well id actually prefer it if you could do the outline i put in the first post please Grin
ok, heres my main character, forget about the others
Name - Izuma Inzori, known as Inferno, or the "Inzori Silver Shadow"
Age - 15
Gender - Male
Hair Colour - Black with a silver streak
Clothing - Black Kelvar jumpsuit with a silver cloak
Eye Colour - Silver
Blade 1 - Silent Samurai MKSCH85 RWD/WRHF
Blade Type/Types - Attack/Defense
Special Attacks -
Level 1: “Silent death,” Silent Samurai disappears and hits opponent with a million kunai and shuriken and kantanas
Level 2: “100 Slices of The Samurais’’,” the Metal Shuriken shell on MSBSCH85 swells and smashes the opponent’s bey 100 times, on the 99th time, Silent Ninja halts and circles the stadium 10 times, cheating a black hurricane that flips the opposing bey out of the stadium with a insanely powerful smash from Silent Samurai.
Level 3: N/A
Level X: “Infinite Blade” Samurai appears and slices at the opponent’s bey with such speed and power that the opposing bey instantly stops and flies out of the stadium 10 meters away, breaking it in half. (Last resort, can only be used three times in a year!)
Allignment (Good or Bad) - double agent
Friend or Foe (Of Tyler) - seems like a foe but is a friend
(Apr. 11, 2011  7:14 AM)Dracovianauis Wrote: ok, heres my main character, forget about the others
Name - Izuma Inzori, known as Inferno, or the "Inzori Silver Shadow"
Age - 15
Gender - Male
Hair Colour - Black with a silver streak
Clothing - Black Kelvar jumpsuit with a silver cloak
Eye Colour - Silver
Blade 1 - Silent Samurai MKSCH85 RWD/WRHF
Blade Type/Types - Attack/Defense
Special Attacks -
Level 1: “Silent death,” Silent Samurai disappears and hits opponent with a million kunai and shuriken and kantanas
Level 2: “100 Slices of The Samurais’’,” the Metal Shuriken shell on MSBSCH85 swells and smashes the opponent’s bey 100 times, on the 99th time, Silent Ninja halts and circles the stadium 10 times, cheating a black hurricane that flips the opposing bey out of the stadium with a insanely powerful smash from Silent Samurai.
Level 3: N/A
Level X: “Infinite Blade” Samurai appears and slices at the opponent’s bey with such speed and power that the opposing bey instantly stops and flies out of the stadium 10 meters away, breaking it in half. (Last resort, can only be used three times in a year!)
Allignment (Good or Bad) - double agent
Friend or Foe (Of Tyler) - seems like a foe but is a friend

Thanks, thats a pefect description for what i need, ill see what content im adding it chapter 2 and you will never know Grin