(Sep. 21, 2013 12:38 PM)jacolal Wrote: [ -> ]Haha, I was hoping that, considering she's your character, I was a bit nervous to take that risk. I may post chapter 4 tomorrow.
Yeah! It's so much better than them being a couple!XD can't wait for the next chapter!!
Yeah... there'll be plenty of surprises in that chapter.
(Sep. 21, 2013 1:04 PM)jacolal Wrote: [ -> ]Yeah... there'll be plenty of surprises in that chapter.
Great!
can't wait!
Okay... I will not be taking any more characters till chapter 6. Sorry glaxy blade. I will not be able to use yours. Sorablader took the last spot.
It's ok, the story is really great!
Thanks a lot galaxy blade!
I am temporarily putting this story to a halt because I am going tob start writing a non beybladesorry guys... story.
Wow This is a bit strange because Ace and Ryu where XD like dating but now brother and sister I'm just A bit disturbed
(Sep. 27, 2013 9:32 PM)XKai_DranzerX Wrote: [ -> ]Wow This is a bit strange because Ace and Ryu where XD like dating but now brother and sister I'm just A bit disturbed
Well... that's just how it is...
Xd really ooh my goodness XD
Please don't spam the thread with like one word as this really isn't gonna be updated for months. And yeah, I had to...
So your not going to post any more chapters for awhile?
I'm actually going to make one chapter for a story every week, at least I hope so. So on friday, maybe saturday, I'll post chapter 4 for this, then the week after, I'll post chapter 2 for Lambent Scale.
Okay... Chapter four is up. Extremely short, but I'll make the next one long. I promise. Please comment on hoe this is, would love to see if people are still reading this.
EDIT: KING: So I just checked, and on the poll, you've voted my story as bad. Could you please tell me why, so that I can improve on this.
Cool 4th chapter!
looking forward to chapter 5!
(Oct. 26, 2013 9:08 PM)jacolal Wrote: [ -> ]Okay... Chapter four is up. Extremely short, but I'll make the next one long. I promise. Please comment on hoe this is, would love to see if people are still reading this.
EDIT: KING: So I just checked, and on the poll, you've voted my story as bad. Could you please tell me why, so that I can improve on this.
U told me PM u, do u want me to post it to?
Awesome 4 chapter I missed your writing
Wow! I can't believe that people still read this. . And enjoy it! Chapter 5 should be up later today... I will edit thos post. .. so stay turned!
Sent from phone zo please excuse any spelling and grammar mistakes.
I'm really liking the Four Pillars so far. Content, length, and spacing are great, but a thing on Chapter 4...
You split the dialogue with a line, which is common for most story writers, but to me, the second line splitting the dialogue seems like it would make somebody reading this for the first time a little lost. I can detect that it means that you separated two different situations, but some others may not catch that.
What I would do, is continue it without a splitting line, and add to the beginning, "Meanwhile..." or something along the lines of that, so it can make it a bit more obvious that it is two different situations.
For example:
Quote:"I wonder who that was..." wondered the boy.
Meanwhile, Jack was running to meet up with Ace and Ryu.
It's a bit more difficult to organize it that way, but it's a bit easier to follow...
However, it's a great story. Keep it up!
No new chapter sorry. Thanks for that defy, I will work on it for the next chapter, promise. I have, however, updated chapter 4 a bit, along with the title. Please do read, and if someone has the time, review my story/stories/a chapter. Thanks in advance.
Well... I was tired, so I was only able to post part of chapter 5. I will update within 8 hours. Sorry guys.
Awesome chapter so far!
you should've had Ace battle Kai!XD anyway looking forest to more!!
(Oct. 28, 2013 1:15 PM)ryukiba Wrote: [ -> ]Awesome chapter so far! you should've had Ace battle Kai!XD anyway looking forest to more!!
Haha. Thanks! I will post chapter 5 soon. My half-term holidays have started, so I'm at home for the whole of this week now.
LOL I'm jealous of Ryukiba She got to battle Kai Lol XD
So... I've updated chapter 5 a bit more. Sorry, I've been really busy, which is why I haven't been able to do much.