World Beyblade Organization by Fighting Spirits Inc.
[Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Printable Version

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+--- Thread: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior (/Thread-Beyblade-story-The-Suffering-Warrior)

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[Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Feb. 22, 2013

I know, three stories at a time. So what, I like writing them, hah. This will be an MFB story. So yah.


Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Character Descriptions



RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Boredomface - Feb. 22, 2013

I am now convinced we really need to make comic books.


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Feb. 22, 2013

Haha, thanks. Chapter 2 will either be up soon, or tomorrow.
Edit: Chapter 2 is up!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Feb. 23, 2013

Chapter 3 is up! Sorry for the slow start.

EDIT: Chapter 4 is up, sorry its short.


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Feb. 28, 2013

Chapter 5 is up!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - DrPepsidew - Feb. 28, 2013

AHH! I meant to vote for good! Sorry!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Feb. 28, 2013

Haha, thats ok. Any ideas on how I could make it better?


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - DrPepsidew - Feb. 28, 2013

It moved REALLY fast. But the #1 issue I see with a lot of stories is character detail, man! Just beef up on the details and you'll have a darn good story Smile I haven't updated in a long while, but I stressed detail in my story, just go check it out, and look for the details I used and how I used them.
OH! And don't forget to indent when starting new paragraphs Smile


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Feb. 28, 2013

Yah, I've been having a problem with that...
Thanks for the feedback! I will check your story out now!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - LMAO - Feb. 28, 2013

this is such a good story! Waiting for the next chapter! Grin


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 03, 2013

Thanks! Chapter 6 is up!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - superiorblader - Mar. 03, 2013

i cant wait to read ch.7


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - thelegISlAtive - Mar. 08, 2013

nice chapters just getting caught up with all of the stories


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 08, 2013

I know, sorry. I just like to write multiple stories so as not to get tired with one. The next chapter may be up tomorrow, but we'll see.


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - LMAO - Mar. 08, 2013

I read every chapter so far! This is so good!!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Sparta - Mar. 10, 2013

I only read chapter one, but I can offer some input.
You're definitely on the right track - not there yet, but definitely on a good path. I can see you're trying to offer insight into the characters, adding description, and all of that. It just feels like it's not enough sometimes, and that makes the paragraphs choppy. if you can lengthen some of those thoughts - really stretch out the ideas - this story will improve greatly. Not bad, though. Not bad at all.


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 10, 2013

Thanks! I'll definitely try to do that!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - LMAO - Mar. 10, 2013

My favourite character so far has to be Foris. When is Chapter 7 going to be up??


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 10, 2013

Probably Monday, but maybe Tuesday.
Thanks for all the feedback guys Smile


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 12, 2013

Ok, chapter 7 is up!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 19, 2013

Chapter 8 is up! Sorry, its short and not all that great, but I'm extremely tired and things have been rough lately.


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 27, 2013

Ok guys, so I haven't posted a chapter, and probably won't today, but here's what I'm gonna do. I am writing 3 stories right now, and I have decided to only give one of them a sequel (it will not be A Bit of the Past though). So when I'm done with this story, and Frozen Mistakes, I will count up the good, great, amazing votes and see which one has more, and that one will get a sequel. So if you haven't already, please vote!


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - aeroblade - Mar. 27, 2013

very cool story . good grammar


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - Dual - Mar. 27, 2013

Thanks, and I try to make the grammar as good as possible, as its one of my pet peeves Tongue_out


RE: [Beyblade story] The Suffering Warrior - LMAO - Apr. 03, 2013

Completely caught up with the whole story, going to go vote in a bit. I LOVE the whole story! Smile