RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Hollowmind13 - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 08, 2021 11:39 PM)PinkRose Wrote: Here goes your entry, hope it's actually writeable XD
Name: Maru Shirasagijo
Nicknames/Aliases: The Elegant Breeze (stage nickname for battles)
Gender: Female
Age: 14
Nationality: Half-French, Half-Japanese
Physical Appearance: Maru appears as a petite teenage girl with a pale complexion, short, wavy hair in teal gradients that barely reaches her shoulders, and soft emerald eyes. Her usual outfit consists of a long-sleeved, frilly white blouse striped with black, a knee-length denim skirt with four brown buttons on the left side, a pair of cerulean blue ballerina shoes with a ribbon on top of each one, a tilted brown beanie with elegant blue embroidery on the rim, a silver ring shaped like an infinity sign, and an overly long scarf in mixed colors of green and blue that she tied around her neck to the left, leaving its ends flapping in the air or hanging just above her feet.
Resonance: Maru's aura appears as a faded haze of blue and green gradients. When she achieves perfect resonance with her Bey, her aura becomes clearer and more distinct in color, and her eyes momentarily flash golden.
Character Alignment: Neutral Good
Personality: Maru is a generally calm yet lighthearted person, and while not very outgoing, is a fairly friendly individual and doesn't mind hanging out with people as long as they don't blabber unncessarily, which she finds annoying. She's a talented artist as well, and has a symmetric vision that she uses in many of her life aspects, such as her clothing having three alternating patterns of fitting colors, and her art having not more than two themes at a time. Due to the aforementioned symmetric philosophy she uses, Maru can be quite rigid and opposed to chaotic changes or unusual elements despite her normally open-minded approach to different matters, but with enough persuasion, she can adapt to and accept change.
When Blading, Maru's main strategy is to try and analyze the opponent prior to the battle to figure out as much as she can about them, and plan accordingly to better her chances of winning. Therefore, she acts more subdued and quiet in battle, so as to not give away too much information about her. If that fails, however, she simply goes with a last-minute plan and hope for the best (this was something she had to learn to do after mutliple encounters, battles and experiences making her slowly change her rigid attitude, not something she started out doing).
Likes: Neutral colors, soft colors, cool weather, winter clothes, scenery, flying by plane, going on picnics, nature-inspired art, simple art, acrylic paint, simple accessories, skirts, cold juices, cinnamon & vanilla-flavored ice cream, casual battles, stadiums with symmetrical shapes (the standard stadium is her favorite)
Dislikes: Too bright colors, extra detailed art, clashing color palettes, hot and humid weather, overly extroverted people, naïvete, unncessary complications, drama, too competitive environments (like Beyblade teams), spicy food, any sort of meat that's not chicken or fish, crunchy food.
Relationships:
1- Lui Shirasagijo: Maru used to sporadically visit her uncle with her parents when she was younger, seeing as he was the closest one to them in the family. She didn't exactly like him at first (mainly because of how awkward he acted when they were in the same space for more than two minutes), but as time passed and she learned that he was (and according to him, still is) a Blading Legend, she started to respect and like him a bit more. This was why, after her father went missing and her mother decided to move back to Japan, she starting visiting him and spending time with him more frequently, even getting into Blading under his tutelage and actually enjoying the game. Now, Maru sees Lui as a second father figure, one that she respects, admires and loves, and she vows to uphold his expectations and her own by advancing on the world stage.
Wow, that's the sappiest relationship section I ever wrote. Ah, frick it
Beys:
1- Vanish Longinus Tapered Mobius -2: Maru's first Bey, a generic combo she got as a gift from her mother (tipped off by Lui ofc) after acing her final exams at the 3rd year of Middle School.
2- Iris Mayura .8 Feather Brush -A: Maru's current Bey, one that she designed on her own by taking some inspiration from her Vanish Longinus and several other elements she added in.
Bey Parts & Details - Iris Mayura .8 Feather Brush (Left-Spin Defense type):
Kiwami Core - Mayura: Mayura is a Left-spinning Kiwami Core featuring a side view of a peacock's head with four feather at the top to represent its namesake; Mayura, the Sanskrit word for peacock, which is one of the sacred birds of the Hindu mythology. The Core's main color scheme is dark blue, the feathers are mixed shades of blue, green, brown and amber, and the one visible eye of the metallic head is golden.
Kiwami Blade - Iris: Iris is a Left-Spinning Kiwami Blade featuring eight curved, feather-like shapes as contact points that almost overlap on each other, giving the Blade a circular shape reminiscent of a peacock's tail. Iris' gimmick lies in the 'feathers', which follow a pattern of one being hollowed out from the inside to absorb impact, while the one next to it features rubber on the outside to allow for Spin-equalization against opposite-spin opponents. The Blade's main color scheme is dark blue, while the feathers alternate between being emerald green and brownish amber on the inside (the green ones are the hollowed-out and the amber ones' outer blue is the rubber).
Kiwami Weight - 8: 8 is a nearly circular Kiwami Weight that looks like a miniature Iris, and its shape gives it good stamina and LAD potential suited for defensive combos.
Kiwami Armor - Allure: Allure is a Kiwami Armor with a gimmick, which is that it can be rotated to fill in the hollowed-out parts of the Iris Blade in both Upper and Lower Mode, by making use of four oval, springy rubber pieces. It is a translucent golden color.
Neo Disc - Feather: Feather is a Neo Disc that supports both the Upper and Lower Modes of Kiwami Beys and has a low center of gravity, similar to Tapered. As its name implies, it features two nearly overlapping feather shapes, which give it a decently circular shape that helps with stamina and LAD-based combinations. It is a solid silver color
Driver - Brush: Brush is a Defense-type Driver with a plastic ball tip and a POM ring just above it, one of which is free-spinning where the other is spring-loaded. The Driver's gimmick lies in the ring, which tilts up and down when it makes contact with the stadium to prevent a knockout with minimal stamina loss. The Driver is translucent amber in color.
Special Moves:
1- Iris Siphon: Mayura spins steadily in the centre, brushing off most attacks and gaining some speed upon contact with a Right-spinning opponent. This move is Maru's go-to at the start of a battle, especially when she doesn't know much about her opponent's Bey.
2- Iris Guard: Mayura circles the centre with its Driver's ring tilting a bit down, using both the hollowed-out and fully rubber feathers to avoid receiving damage.
3- Allure Spark: When its hollowed-out feathers are filled, Mayura uses them in conjunction with the rubber ones to deliver several quick strikes, utilizing the rubber's increased recoil to make them more impactful. This move is particularly effecient at low spin speeds in opposite-spin, as it also adds the risk of a Slow-Motion Burst if the opponent's Bey has a much higher spin speed.
4- Enchant Wing Counter: When knocked back, Mayura's Brush Driver tilts down, before immediately shooting it upwards in a counterattack that flings the opponent's Bey up in the air, which could result in an Over Finish or, in some cases, a Burst Finish.
Launch Technique: Maru holds her Launcher above her head, spinning it in her right hand twice before adjusting her beanie with a thin smirk, dropping her hand right in front of her, and pulling on the string at the call of "GO...Shoot!"
Trivia:
1- Despite being born and mainly raised in France, Maru's French is pretty bad. As such, she prefers speaking in Japanese whenever she can, and that was one of several factors that helped her settle in better after moving to Hokkaido.
2- Maru's stage name in battles was actually just a random suggestion from one of her friends that she shot down, but someone coined it as her official nickname and she's not happy about that.
3- Lui isn't Maru's direct uncle, he's actually both her parents' cousin (her parents, Ruri and Luis, are cousins as well), but due to family shenanigans, he's the closest to both of them and practically the only one who supported their marriage, and as such, is the one they're in most contact with. Holy Horusood, that's a lot of words.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - PinkRose - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 1:21 AM)LJ-Blader Wrote: Okay, can Shin and Maru (if it is okay with PinkRose) have a rivalry as Shu Vs Lui?
Hmm, I don't know. Maru's not exactly the type to have a rivalry that intense as she dislikes heavy comeptitive-ness; so I can see them more as distant kinda-sorta friends or in a one-sided rivalrly on Shin's end. But if Kiryu Kazuma goes for that route, I wouldn't really mind.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Kiryu Kazuma - Aug. 09, 2021
Chapter 2:
Chapter 2: God? Demon!? Gloom Wendigo!
(At Ichiban's home)
Valt (looks at Ichiban): Geez even I don't slept so long when I was at his age....
Valt: (Says loudly): Wake up, Ichi!
Ichiban (wakes up): Huh? What time is it?
(He looks at the clock)
Ichiban: It's 3'o clock....
(Flashback starts)
Chikara: You know.... I got scouted by BC Sol.
Chikara: Well I'll See you tomorrow, Ichi.
(Flashback ends)
Ichiban: Oh no I'm late!
Valt: Late? For what?
(He picks up Icarus and lefts to find Chikara)
Ichiban (While running): I hope he'll be still there!
(He looks at the park)
Ichiban: He's not here....
(He looks at the bey stadium)
Ichiban: Not even here!
(While looking for him, he reached New Beigoma Academy)
Ichiban (Hears the sound of beys bursting): That sound....
(He enters inside and founds so many bladers having a battle with each other)
Ichiban: Amazing....
Blader #1: Hey you can't just barge in here!
Ichiban: Am I not welcome here?
Blader #2: Only the strongest bladers are welcome here. So yo-
Ichiban (Shows off his bey): Then you can try me right now!
Blader #1 (looks at Blader #2): Hey William, Is that a...
William: You're right Max... It's a Kiwami Bey...
Ichiban : Yeah, so what do ya guys say?
Max (Takes out his launcher): We're gonna test you in a battle, and see if you're worthy of a Kiwami Bey or not!
(Both of them takes their positions near the stadium)
Max (Shows off his bey): Vanish Bahamut will be your opponent!
Ichiban (changes to lower mode and smiles broadly): Bring it on!
Max: I'm going to wipe that stupid grin from your face!
William: I'll the ref, First Battle!
(Both of them takes their shooting stances)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban/Blader #1: 3! 2! 1!
Ichiban: Go... Shoot!! (His launcher glows brightly)
Max: My bey is gonna knock you out!
(Bahamut dashed at Icarus)
Ichiban: As if I'll let you.
(Icarus uses the Amaze driver to dodge)
Max: It's fast....
Ichiban: Now it's time to end this!
(Amaze driver's metal portion makes contact with the stadium and rushes towards Bahamut)
Ichiban: Time to finish this, Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Bahamut and bursts it)
Max (Gasps): What the heck!?
William: Unbelivable... Aviate Icaurs wins with a burst finish!
Ichiban (picks up his bey): Good joob, Icarus...
(Icarus shines and suddenly everything turns white and he founds himself in a white void)
Ichiban: W....Where am I?
(Icarus appears in front of him)
Ichiban: Is that you.... Icarus?
Icarus: That was exciting right?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yeah it was!
Icarus (Points towards him): You and I.... We will fly high and reach to the top!
Ichiban: Yeah! I know we will!
(Ichiban opens his eyes)
Ichiban (Looks at Max): So am I welcome here or not?
Max (Looks at him angrily): Why you....
??? (Pushes Max aside): Move away.
Ichiban: Huh? Who're you?
??? (Flips his hair): The captain of New Beigoma, Watashi Morita and what about you? Got a name?
Ichiban: It's Ichiban Aoi!
Max (Hesitantly): Aoi..? Are you related to Valt Aoi?
Ichiban: Yeah, he's my dad.
Watashi (Smiles): So you're Valt's brat huh? Why do you came here?
Ichiban: I heard the sound of beys so I came in!
Watashi (Leers at Ichiban): So you came here for a battle?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yup!
Watashi (Shows his bey): Set your eyes on Gloom Wendigo!
Ichiban (Gasps): You got a kiwami bey too?
Watashi: Yeah and it's a lot better than yours.
Ichiban (Takes out his launcher): You'll never find out without having a battle!
Watashi (Switches to lower mode): Watch out for your bey, It's a warning from God!
William: So he's gonna....
Max (mumbles): No don't say it loudly...
Ichiban: (What's going on here?)
William: First Battle! Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (throws his launcher up): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
Watashi (Catches his launcher with his left hand): Go... Shoot!
(Wendigo lands on the center of the stadium)
Ichiban (Gasps): What..?
Watashi: God's Warning!
(Wendigo's blades glows purple)
Ichiban: Go! Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Wendigo but it didn't moved)
Watashi: It's no use, Ichiban.
Ichiban (looks at Watashi): Huh?
Watashi: There's no bey in existence who can move Wendigo from the center.
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): Tch.. Icarus!!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
Ichiban: Amaze Strike!
(Amaze driver's metal portion cames in contact with the stadium and picks up speed)
Watashi (Smirks): Come at me with all you've got! It would make no difference!!
(Icarus hits Wendigo which creates a explosive cyclone around the stadium)
Ichiban (Screams): Icarus, Full power!!
(Icarus pushes Wendigo out of the stadium)
Watashi: What?
(Wendigo hits the ground before Icarus did)
William (Hesitantly): Aviate Icarus, Over Finish! The Score is 1-0!
Watashi (Smiles): So you're not that bad huh...?
Ichiban (Points his finger up): This time Wendigo's going to burst!
Watashi (Takes out his launcher): William, start the match!
William: R.. Right! Second Battle!
Ichiban (Switches to upper mode): Let's go!
Wakashi: (He switched to upper mode...)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (Throws his laucher up and thinks): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
William: (This time I'll use right one)
Ichiban: Go....
William (Catches his launcher with his right hand): Shoot!!
Ichiban: (He used his right hand?!)
Watashi: Devil's Awakening!
(Wendigo lands on the edge of the stadium and glows brightly)
Ichiban: Let's go, Icarus! Send Wendingo out of the stadium!
(Icarus heads towards Wendingo with full speed)
Watashi (Unleashes his aura): Wendigo!!
(Wendigo appears from the bright purple aura)
Watashi: Moment Crash!
(Wendigo uses the edge and crashes towards Icarus and sends it flying)
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): I'm not going to lose! Icarus!
(Icarus's eyes shines)
Icarus: Leave this to me!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
(Icarus hits the wall of the stadium and survives)
Ichiban: Let's go! Amaze Flash!!
(Icarus rides the edge of the stadium and gains incredible amount of speed)
Watashi: Crush him, Wendigo!
(Wendigo's avatar uses his axe to attack)
Ichiban: Icarus!!
(Icarus and Wendigo collides with each other which creates a huge explosion which broke all the windows of the academy)
Watashi: Burst him!
Ichiban: In your dreams!
(Icarus and Wendigo clashed again and again and again)
Ichiban: Aviate.... Slash!!
(Icarus's four blades begins to shine and sends Wendigo sky high)
Watashi: (Gasps)
Ichiban: All right!
(Suddenly Icarus's glowing begins to dim and it starts to wobble on the center)
Ichiban: W.. What's wrong?
Watashi: Looks like it's my turn now! Gloom Dive!!
(Wendigo dives on Icarus with full force and bursts Icarus)
Ichiban (Gasps): This can't be....
William: Gloom Wendigo, Burst Finish! With the score of 2-1, Wakashi Morita wins the match!
Watashi: What's wrong? Where is your sweet smile?(Laughs)
(Ichiban picks up Icarus and assembles it)
Wakashi: Your name Ichiban might means "The Best" but I guess there's no accounting for taste!
Ichiban: Huh?
Wakashi: I guess we should start calling him Ichi-bad, am I right (laughs)
(Everyone starting laughing at Ichiban)
Ichiban: Hehe.... That's not funny at all!!
???: That's enough!
Wakshi (looks at him): It's you.... Fubiki Sumie-san.
Ichiban (looks a Fubuki): That's Fubuki Sumie?
(To be Continued)
Read this after reading the chapter:
I wanted to add more details and make the battle more longer. Which I couldn't cuz my exams have started and I will post chapters more late because of that.
(Aug. 09, 2021 2:59 PM)PinkRose Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 1:21 AM)LJ-Blader Wrote: Okay, can Shin and Maru (if it is okay with PinkRose) have a rivalry as Shu Vs Lui?
Hmm, I don't know. Maru's not exactly the type to have a rivalry that intense as she dislikes heavy comeptitive-ness; so I can see them more as distant kinda-sorta friends or in a one-sided rivalrly on Shin's end. But if Kiryu Kazuma goes for that route, I wouldn't really mind.
I'll think about it.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - PinkRose - Aug. 09, 2021
You know, I like the little detail of practically every character's name having a meaning (Ichiban means The Best or Number 1, Chikara means power, Watashi means I/Me...actually the latter is kinda funny now that I think about it), and it's made even better by some entries (namely Shin and Maru) having meaningful names too.
The battle was fairly well-done by the way, but I'd have liked a bit more detail on the appearance of Icarus and Wendigo's avatar. Otherwise, aside from a couple frequent typos, this chapter turned out pretty good. Looks like you're really off to a good start, keep up the momentum *thumbs up*
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - GenesisBlader - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 3:13 PM)Kiryu Kazuma Wrote: Chapter 2:
Chapter 2: God? Demon!? Gloom Wendigo!
(At Ichiban's home)
Valt (looks at Ichiban): Geez even I don't slept so long when I was at his age....
Valt: (Says loudly): Wake up, Ichi!
Ichiban (wakes up): Huh? What time is it?
(He looks at the clock)
Ichiban: It's 3'o clock....
(Flashback starts)
Chikara: You know.... I got scouted by BC Sol.
Chikara: Well I'll See you tomorrow, Ichi.
(Flashback ends)
Ichiban: Oh no I'm late!
Valt: Late? For what?
(He picks up Icarus and lefts to find Chikara)
Ichiban (While running): I hope he'll be still there!
(He looks at the park)
Ichiban: He's not here....
(He looks at the bey stadium)
Ichiban: Not even here!
(While looking for him, he reached New Beigoma Academy)
Ichiban (Hears the sound of beys bursting): That sound....
(He enters inside and founds so many bladers having a battle with each other)
Ichiban: Amazing....
Blader #1: Hey you can't just barge in here!
Ichiban: Am I not welcome here?
Blader #2: Only the strongest bladers are welcome here. So yo-
Ichiban (Shows off his bey): Then you can try me right now!
Blader #1 (looks at Blader #2): Hey William, Is that a...
William: You're right Max... It's a Kiwami Bey...
Ichiban : Yeah, so what do ya guys say?
Max (Takes out his launcher): We're gonna test you in a battle, and see if you're worthy of a Kiwami Bey or not!
(Both of them takes their positions near the stadium)
Max (Shows off his bey): Vanish Bahamut will be your opponent!
Ichiban (changes to lower mode and smiles broadly): Bring it on!
Max: I'm going to wipe that stupid grin from your face!
William: I'll the ref, First Battle!
(Both of them takes their shooting stances)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban/Blader #1: 3! 2! 1!
Ichiban: Go... Shoot!! (His launcher glows brightly)
Max: My bey is gonna knock you out!
(Bahamut dashed at Icarus)
Ichiban: As if I'll let you.
(Icarus uses the Amaze driver to dodge)
Max: It's fast....
Ichiban: Now it's time to end this!
(Amaze driver's metal portion makes contact with the stadium and rushes towards Bahamut)
Ichiban: Time to finish this, Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Bahamut and bursts it)
Max (Gasps): What the heck!?
William: Unbelivable... Aviate Icaurs wins with a burst finish!
Ichiban (picks up his bey): Good joob, Icarus...
(Icarus shines and suddenly everything turns white and he founds himself in a white void)
Ichiban: W....Where am I?
(Icarus appears in front of him)
Ichiban: Is that you.... Icarus?
Icarus: That was exciting right?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yeah it was!
Icarus (Points towards him): You and I.... We will fly high and reach to the top!
Ichiban: Yeah! I know we will!
(Ichiban opens his eyes)
Ichiban (Looks at Max): So am I welcome here or not?
Max (Looks at him angrily): Why you....
??? (Pushes Max aside): Move away.
Ichiban: Huh? Who're you?
??? (Flips his hair): The captain of New Beigoma, Watashi Morita and what about you? Got a name?
Ichiban: It's Ichiban Aoi!
Max (Hesitantly): Aoi..? Are you related to Valt Aoi?
Ichiban: Yeah, he's my dad.
Watashi (Smiles): So you're Valt's brat huh? Why do you came here?
Ichiban: I heard the sound of beys so I came in!
Watashi (Leers at Ichiban): So you came here for a battle?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yup!
Watashi (Shows his bey): Set your eyes on Gloom Wendigo!
Ichiban (Gasps): You got a kiwami bey too?
Watashi: Yeah and it's a lot better than yours.
Ichiban (Takes out his launcher): You'll never find out without having a battle!
Watashi (Switches to lower mode): Watch out for your bey, It's a warning from God!
William: So he's gonna....
Max (mumbles): No don't say it loudly...
Ichiban: (What's going on here?)
William: First Battle! Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (throws his launcher up): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
Watashi (Catches his launcher with his left hand): Go... Shoot!
(Wendigo lands on the center of the stadium)
Ichiban (Gasps): What..?
Watashi: God's Warning!
(Wendigo's blades glows purple)
Ichiban: Go! Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Wendigo but it didn't moved)
Watashi: It's no use, Ichiban.
Ichiban (looks at Watashi): Huh?
Watashi: There's no bey in existence who can move Wendigo from the center.
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): Tch.. Icarus!!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
Ichiban: Amaze Strike!
(Amaze driver's metal portion cames in contact with the stadium and picks up speed)
Watashi (Smirks): Come at me with all you've got! It would make no difference!!
(Icarus hits Wendigo which creates a explosive cyclone around the stadium)
Ichiban (Screams): Icarus, Full power!!
(Icarus pushes Wendigo out of the stadium)
Watashi: What?
(Wendigo hits the ground before Icarus did)
William (Hesitantly): Aviate Icarus, Over Finish! The Score is 1-0!
Watashi (Smiles): So you're not that bad huh...?
Ichiban (Points his finger up): This time Wendigo's going to burst!
Watashi (Takes out his launcher): William, start the match!
William: R.. Right! Second Battle!
Ichiban (Switches to upper mode): Let's go!
Wakashi: (He switched to upper mode...)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (Throws his laucher up and thinks): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
William: (This time I'll use right one)
Ichiban: Go....
William (Catches his launcher with his right hand): Shoot!!
Ichiban: (He used his right hand?!)
Watashi: Devil's Awakening!
(Wendigo lands on the edge of the stadium and glows brightly)
Ichiban: Let's go, Icarus! Send Wendingo out of the stadium!
(Icarus heads towards Wendingo with full speed)
Watashi (Unleashes his aura): Wendigo!!
(Wendigo appears from the bright purple aura)
Watashi: Moment Crash!
(Wendigo uses the edge and crashes towards Icarus and sends it flying)
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): I'm not going to lose! Icarus!
(Icarus's eyes shines)
Icarus: Leave this to me!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
(Icarus hits the wall of the stadium and survives)
Ichiban: Let's go! Amaze Flash!!
(Icarus rides the edge of the stadium and gains incredible amount of speed)
Watashi: Crush him, Wendigo!
(Wendigo's avatar uses his axe to attack)
Ichiban: Icarus!!
(Icarus and Wendigo collides with each other which creates a huge explosion which broke all the windows of the academy)
Watashi: Burst him!
Ichiban: In your dreams!
(Icarus and Wendigo clashed again and again and again)
Ichiban: Aviate.... Slash!!
(Icarus's four blades begins to shine and sends Wendigo sky high)
Watashi: (Gasps)
Ichiban: All right!
(Suddenly Icarus's glowing begins to dim and it starts to wobble on the center)
Ichiban: W.. What's wrong?
Watashi: Looks like it's my turn now! Gloom Dive!!
(Wendigo dives on Icarus with full force and bursts Icarus)
Ichiban (Gasps): This can't be....
William: Gloom Wendigo, Burst Finish! With the score of 2-1, Wakashi Morita wins the match!
Watashi: What's wrong? Where is your sweet smile?(Laughs)
(Ichiban picks up Icarus and assembles it)
Wakashi: Your name Ichiban might means "The Best" but I guess there's no accounting for taste!
Ichiban: Huh?
Wakashi: I guess we should start calling him Ichi-bad, am I right (laughs)
(Everyone starting laughing at Ichiban)
Ichiban: Hehe.... That's not funny at all!!
???: That's enough!
Wakshi (looks at him): It's you.... Fubiki Sumie-san.
Ichiban (looks a Fubuki): That's Fubuki Sumie?
(To be Continued)
Read this after reading the chapter:
I wanted to add more details and make the battle more longer. Which I couldn't cuz my exams have started and I will post chapters more late because of that.
(Aug. 09, 2021 2:59 PM)PinkRose Wrote: Hmm, I don't know. Maru's not exactly the type to have a rivalry that intense as she dislikes heavy comeptitive-ness; so I can see them more as distant kinda-sorta friends or in a one-sided rivalrly on Shin's end. But if Kiryu Kazuma goes for that route, I wouldn't really mind.
I'll think about it.
zue hua pao pao pi pon shiao shiao
in other words nice chapter dude
for having an exam start right after you finish a chapter this was amazingly gud
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - i'm batman - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 3:13 PM)Kiryu Kazuma Wrote: Chapter 2:
Chapter 2: God? Demon!? Gloom Wendigo!
(At Ichiban's home)
Valt (looks at Ichiban): Geez even I don't slept so long when I was at his age....
Valt: (Says loudly): Wake up, Ichi!
Ichiban (wakes up): Huh? What time is it?
(He looks at the clock)
Ichiban: It's 3'o clock....
(Flashback starts)
Chikara: You know.... I got scouted by BC Sol.
Chikara: Well I'll See you tomorrow, Ichi.
(Flashback ends)
Ichiban: Oh no I'm late!
Valt: Late? For what?
(He picks up Icarus and lefts to find Chikara)
Ichiban (While running): I hope he'll be still there!
(He looks at the park)
Ichiban: He's not here....
(He looks at the bey stadium)
Ichiban: Not even here!
(While looking for him, he reached New Beigoma Academy)
Ichiban (Hears the sound of beys bursting): That sound....
(He enters inside and founds so many bladers having a battle with each other)
Ichiban: Amazing....
Blader #1: Hey you can't just barge in here!
Ichiban: Am I not welcome here?
Blader #2: Only the strongest bladers are welcome here. So yo-
Ichiban (Shows off his bey): Then you can try me right now!
Blader #1 (looks at Blader #2): Hey William, Is that a...
William: You're right Max... It's a Kiwami Bey...
Ichiban : Yeah, so what do ya guys say?
Max (Takes out his launcher): We're gonna test you in a battle, and see if you're worthy of a Kiwami Bey or not!
(Both of them takes their positions near the stadium)
Max (Shows off his bey): Vanish Bahamut will be your opponent!
Ichiban (changes to lower mode and smiles broadly): Bring it on!
Max: I'm going to wipe that stupid grin from your face!
William: I'll the ref, First Battle!
(Both of them takes their shooting stances)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban/Blader #1: 3! 2! 1!
Ichiban: Go... Shoot!! (His launcher glows brightly)
Max: My bey is gonna knock you out!
(Bahamut dashed at Icarus)
Ichiban: As if I'll let you.
(Icarus uses the Amaze driver to dodge)
Max: It's fast....
Ichiban: Now it's time to end this!
(Amaze driver's metal portion makes contact with the stadium and rushes towards Bahamut)
Ichiban: Time to finish this, Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Bahamut and bursts it)
Max (Gasps): What the heck!?
William: Unbelivable... Aviate Icaurs wins with a burst finish!
Ichiban (picks up his bey): Good joob, Icarus...
(Icarus shines and suddenly everything turns white and he founds himself in a white void)
Ichiban: W....Where am I?
(Icarus appears in front of him)
Ichiban: Is that you.... Icarus?
Icarus: That was exciting right?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yeah it was!
Icarus (Points towards him): You and I.... We will fly high and reach to the top!
Ichiban: Yeah! I know we will!
(Ichiban opens his eyes)
Ichiban (Looks at Max): So am I welcome here or not?
Max (Looks at him angrily): Why you....
??? (Pushes Max aside): Move away.
Ichiban: Huh? Who're you?
??? (Flips his hair): The captain of New Beigoma, Watashi Morita and what about you? Got a name?
Ichiban: It's Ichiban Aoi!
Max (Hesitantly): Aoi..? Are you related to Valt Aoi?
Ichiban: Yeah, he's my dad.
Watashi (Smiles): So you're Valt's brat huh? Why do you came here?
Ichiban: I heard the sound of beys so I came in!
Watashi (Leers at Ichiban): So you came here for a battle?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yup!
Watashi (Shows his bey): Set your eyes on Gloom Wendigo!
Ichiban (Gasps): You got a kiwami bey too?
Watashi: Yeah and it's a lot better than yours.
Ichiban (Takes out his launcher): You'll never find out without having a battle!
Watashi (Switches to lower mode): Watch out for your bey, It's a warning from God!
William: So he's gonna....
Max (mumbles): No don't say it loudly...
Ichiban: (What's going on here?)
William: First Battle! Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (throws his launcher up): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
Watashi (Catches his launcher with his left hand): Go... Shoot!
(Wendigo lands on the center of the stadium)
Ichiban (Gasps): What..?
Watashi: God's Warning!
(Wendigo's blades glows purple)
Ichiban: Go! Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Wendigo but it didn't moved)
Watashi: It's no use, Ichiban.
Ichiban (looks at Watashi): Huh?
Watashi: There's no bey in existence who can move Wendigo from the center.
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): Tch.. Icarus!!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
Ichiban: Amaze Strike!
(Amaze driver's metal portion cames in contact with the stadium and picks up speed)
Watashi (Smirks): Come at me with all you've got! It would make no difference!!
(Icarus hits Wendigo which creates a explosive cyclone around the stadium)
Ichiban (Screams): Icarus, Full power!!
(Icarus pushes Wendigo out of the stadium)
Watashi: What?
(Wendigo hits the ground before Icarus did)
William (Hesitantly): Aviate Icarus, Over Finish! The Score is 1-0!
Watashi (Smiles): So you're not that bad huh...?
Ichiban (Points his finger up): This time Wendigo's going to burst!
Watashi (Takes out his launcher): William, start the match!
William: R.. Right! Second Battle!
Ichiban (Switches to upper mode): Let's go!
Wakashi: (He switched to upper mode...)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (Throws his laucher up and thinks): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
William: (This time I'll use right one)
Ichiban: Go....
William (Catches his launcher with his right hand): Shoot!!
Ichiban: (He used his right hand?!)
Watashi: Devil's Awakening!
(Wendigo lands on the edge of the stadium and glows brightly)
Ichiban: Let's go, Icarus! Send Wendingo out of the stadium!
(Icarus heads towards Wendingo with full speed)
Watashi (Unleashes his aura): Wendigo!!
(Wendigo appears from the bright purple aura)
Watashi: Moment Crash!
(Wendigo uses the edge and crashes towards Icarus and sends it flying)
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): I'm not going to lose! Icarus!
(Icarus's eyes shines)
Icarus: Leave this to me!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
(Icarus hits the wall of the stadium and survives)
Ichiban: Let's go! Amaze Flash!!
(Icarus rides the edge of the stadium and gains incredible amount of speed)
Watashi: Crush him, Wendigo!
(Wendigo's avatar uses his axe to attack)
Ichiban: Icarus!!
(Icarus and Wendigo collides with each other which creates a huge explosion which broke all the windows of the academy)
Watashi: Burst him!
Ichiban: In your dreams!
(Icarus and Wendigo clashed again and again and again)
Ichiban: Aviate.... Slash!!
(Icarus's four blades begins to shine and sends Wendigo sky high)
Watashi: (Gasps)
Ichiban: All right!
(Suddenly Icarus's glowing begins to dim and it starts to wobble on the center)
Ichiban: W.. What's wrong?
Watashi: Looks like it's my turn now! Gloom Dive!!
(Wendigo dives on Icarus with full force and bursts Icarus)
Ichiban (Gasps): This can't be....
William: Gloom Wendigo, Burst Finish! With the score of 2-1, Wakashi Morita wins the match!
Watashi: What's wrong? Where is your sweet smile?(Laughs)
(Ichiban picks up Icarus and assembles it)
Wakashi: Your name Ichiban might means "The Best" but I guess there's no accounting for taste!
Ichiban: Huh?
Wakashi: I guess we should start calling him Ichi-bad, am I right (laughs)
(Everyone starting laughing at Ichiban)
Ichiban: Hehe.... That's not funny at all!!
???: That's enough!
Wakshi (looks at him): It's you.... Fubiki Sumie-san.
Ichiban (looks a Fubuki): That's Fubuki Sumie?
(To be Continued)
Read this after reading the chapter:
I wanted to add more details and make the battle more longer. Which I couldn't cuz my exams have started and I will post chapters more late because of that.
(Aug. 09, 2021 2:59 PM)PinkRose Wrote: Hmm, I don't know. Maru's not exactly the type to have a rivalry that intense as she dislikes heavy comeptitive-ness; so I can see them more as distant kinda-sorta friends or in a one-sided rivalrly on Shin's end. But if Kiryu Kazuma goes for that route, I wouldn't really mind.
I'll think about it.
A couple grammar mistakes and typos and a mix-up between Watashi and William in a couple places, nothing major. Well done otherwise! Is Morita as Watashi's last name coincidental or intentional? BTW, hope you do well on your exams!
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - GenesisBlader - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 4:01 PM)i\m batman Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 3:13 PM)Kiryu Kazuma Wrote: Chapter 2:
Chapter 2: God? Demon!? Gloom Wendigo!
(At Ichiban's home)
Valt (looks at Ichiban): Geez even I don't slept so long when I was at his age....
Valt: (Says loudly): Wake up, Ichi!
Ichiban (wakes up): Huh? What time is it?
(He looks at the clock)
Ichiban: It's 3'o clock....
(Flashback starts)
Chikara: You know.... I got scouted by BC Sol.
Chikara: Well I'll See you tomorrow, Ichi.
(Flashback ends)
Ichiban: Oh no I'm late!
Valt: Late? For what?
(He picks up Icarus and lefts to find Chikara)
Ichiban (While running): I hope he'll be still there!
(He looks at the park)
Ichiban: He's not here....
(He looks at the bey stadium)
Ichiban: Not even here!
(While looking for him, he reached New Beigoma Academy)
Ichiban (Hears the sound of beys bursting): That sound....
(He enters inside and founds so many bladers having a battle with each other)
Ichiban: Amazing....
Blader #1: Hey you can't just barge in here!
Ichiban: Am I not welcome here?
Blader #2: Only the strongest bladers are welcome here. So yo-
Ichiban (Shows off his bey): Then you can try me right now!
Blader #1 (looks at Blader #2): Hey William, Is that a...
William: You're right Max... It's a Kiwami Bey...
Ichiban : Yeah, so what do ya guys say?
Max (Takes out his launcher): We're gonna test you in a battle, and see if you're worthy of a Kiwami Bey or not!
(Both of them takes their positions near the stadium)
Max (Shows off his bey): Vanish Bahamut will be your opponent!
Ichiban (changes to lower mode and smiles broadly): Bring it on!
Max: I'm going to wipe that stupid grin from your face!
William: I'll the ref, First Battle!
(Both of them takes their shooting stances)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban/Blader #1: 3! 2! 1!
Ichiban: Go... Shoot!! (His launcher glows brightly)
Max: My bey is gonna knock you out!
(Bahamut dashed at Icarus)
Ichiban: As if I'll let you.
(Icarus uses the Amaze driver to dodge)
Max: It's fast....
Ichiban: Now it's time to end this!
(Amaze driver's metal portion makes contact with the stadium and rushes towards Bahamut)
Ichiban: Time to finish this, Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Bahamut and bursts it)
Max (Gasps): What the heck!?
William: Unbelivable... Aviate Icaurs wins with a burst finish!
Ichiban (picks up his bey): Good joob, Icarus...
(Icarus shines and suddenly everything turns white and he founds himself in a white void)
Ichiban: W....Where am I?
(Icarus appears in front of him)
Ichiban: Is that you.... Icarus?
Icarus: That was exciting right?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yeah it was!
Icarus (Points towards him): You and I.... We will fly high and reach to the top!
Ichiban: Yeah! I know we will!
(Ichiban opens his eyes)
Ichiban (Looks at Max): So am I welcome here or not?
Max (Looks at him angrily): Why you....
??? (Pushes Max aside): Move away.
Ichiban: Huh? Who're you?
??? (Flips his hair): The captain of New Beigoma, Watashi Morita and what about you? Got a name?
Ichiban: It's Ichiban Aoi!
Max (Hesitantly): Aoi..? Are you related to Valt Aoi?
Ichiban: Yeah, he's my dad.
Watashi (Smiles): So you're Valt's brat huh? Why do you came here?
Ichiban: I heard the sound of beys so I came in!
Watashi (Leers at Ichiban): So you came here for a battle?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yup!
Watashi (Shows his bey): Set your eyes on Gloom Wendigo!
Ichiban (Gasps): You got a kiwami bey too?
Watashi: Yeah and it's a lot better than yours.
Ichiban (Takes out his launcher): You'll never find out without having a battle!
Watashi (Switches to lower mode): Watch out for your bey, It's a warning from God!
William: So he's gonna....
Max (mumbles): No don't say it loudly...
Ichiban: (What's going on here?)
William: First Battle! Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (throws his launcher up): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
Watashi (Catches his launcher with his left hand): Go... Shoot!
(Wendigo lands on the center of the stadium)
Ichiban (Gasps): What..?
Watashi: God's Warning!
(Wendigo's blades glows purple)
Ichiban: Go! Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Wendigo but it didn't moved)
Watashi: It's no use, Ichiban.
Ichiban (looks at Watashi): Huh?
Watashi: There's no bey in existence who can move Wendigo from the center.
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): Tch.. Icarus!!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
Ichiban: Amaze Strike!
(Amaze driver's metal portion cames in contact with the stadium and picks up speed)
Watashi (Smirks): Come at me with all you've got! It would make no difference!!
(Icarus hits Wendigo which creates a explosive cyclone around the stadium)
Ichiban (Screams): Icarus, Full power!!
(Icarus pushes Wendigo out of the stadium)
Watashi: What?
(Wendigo hits the ground before Icarus did)
William (Hesitantly): Aviate Icarus, Over Finish! The Score is 1-0!
Watashi (Smiles): So you're not that bad huh...?
Ichiban (Points his finger up): This time Wendigo's going to burst!
Watashi (Takes out his launcher): William, start the match!
William: R.. Right! Second Battle!
Ichiban (Switches to upper mode): Let's go!
Wakashi: (He switched to upper mode...)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (Throws his laucher up and thinks): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
William: (This time I'll use right one)
Ichiban: Go....
William (Catches his launcher with his right hand): Shoot!!
Ichiban: (He used his right hand?!)
Watashi: Devil's Awakening!
(Wendigo lands on the edge of the stadium and glows brightly)
Ichiban: Let's go, Icarus! Send Wendingo out of the stadium!
(Icarus heads towards Wendingo with full speed)
Watashi (Unleashes his aura): Wendigo!!
(Wendigo appears from the bright purple aura)
Watashi: Moment Crash!
(Wendigo uses the edge and crashes towards Icarus and sends it flying)
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): I'm not going to lose! Icarus!
(Icarus's eyes shines)
Icarus: Leave this to me!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
(Icarus hits the wall of the stadium and survives)
Ichiban: Let's go! Amaze Flash!!
(Icarus rides the edge of the stadium and gains incredible amount of speed)
Watashi: Crush him, Wendigo!
(Wendigo's avatar uses his axe to attack)
Ichiban: Icarus!!
(Icarus and Wendigo collides with each other which creates a huge explosion which broke all the windows of the academy)
Watashi: Burst him!
Ichiban: In your dreams!
(Icarus and Wendigo clashed again and again and again)
Ichiban: Aviate.... Slash!!
(Icarus's four blades begins to shine and sends Wendigo sky high)
Watashi: (Gasps)
Ichiban: All right!
(Suddenly Icarus's glowing begins to dim and it starts to wobble on the center)
Ichiban: W.. What's wrong?
Watashi: Looks like it's my turn now! Gloom Dive!!
(Wendigo dives on Icarus with full force and bursts Icarus)
Ichiban (Gasps): This can't be....
William: Gloom Wendigo, Burst Finish! With the score of 2-1, Wakashi Morita wins the match!
Watashi: What's wrong? Where is your sweet smile?(Laughs)
(Ichiban picks up Icarus and assembles it)
Wakashi: Your name Ichiban might means "The Best" but I guess there's no accounting for taste!
Ichiban: Huh?
Wakashi: I guess we should start calling him Ichi-bad, am I right (laughs)
(Everyone starting laughing at Ichiban)
Ichiban: Hehe.... That's not funny at all!!
???: That's enough!
Wakshi (looks at him): It's you.... Fubiki Sumie-san.
Ichiban (looks a Fubuki): That's Fubuki Sumie?
(To be Continued)
Read this after reading the chapter:
I wanted to add more details and make the battle more longer. Which I couldn't cuz my exams have started and I will post chapters more late because of that.
I'll think about it.
A couple grammar mistakes and typos and a mix-up between Watashi and William in a couple places, nothing major. Well done otherwise! Is Morita as Watashi's last name coincidental or intentional? BTW, hope you do well on your exams! coincidence? i think not
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Kiryu Kazuma - Aug. 09, 2021
Avatar's of Beys
Icarus
Wendigo
Centaur
(Aug. 09, 2021 4:01 PM)i\m batman Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 3:13 PM)Kiryu Kazuma Wrote: Chapter 2:
Chapter 2: God? Demon!? Gloom Wendigo!
(At Ichiban's home)
Valt (looks at Ichiban): Geez even I don't slept so long when I was at his age....
Valt: (Says loudly): Wake up, Ichi!
Ichiban (wakes up): Huh? What time is it?
(He looks at the clock)
Ichiban: It's 3'o clock....
(Flashback starts)
Chikara: You know.... I got scouted by BC Sol.
Chikara: Well I'll See you tomorrow, Ichi.
(Flashback ends)
Ichiban: Oh no I'm late!
Valt: Late? For what?
(He picks up Icarus and lefts to find Chikara)
Ichiban (While running): I hope he'll be still there!
(He looks at the park)
Ichiban: He's not here....
(He looks at the bey stadium)
Ichiban: Not even here!
(While looking for him, he reached New Beigoma Academy)
Ichiban (Hears the sound of beys bursting): That sound....
(He enters inside and founds so many bladers having a battle with each other)
Ichiban: Amazing....
Blader #1: Hey you can't just barge in here!
Ichiban: Am I not welcome here?
Blader #2: Only the strongest bladers are welcome here. So yo-
Ichiban (Shows off his bey): Then you can try me right now!
Blader #1 (looks at Blader #2): Hey William, Is that a...
William: You're right Max... It's a Kiwami Bey...
Ichiban : Yeah, so what do ya guys say?
Max (Takes out his launcher): We're gonna test you in a battle, and see if you're worthy of a Kiwami Bey or not!
(Both of them takes their positions near the stadium)
Max (Shows off his bey): Vanish Bahamut will be your opponent!
Ichiban (changes to lower mode and smiles broadly): Bring it on!
Max: I'm going to wipe that stupid grin from your face!
William: I'll the ref, First Battle!
(Both of them takes their shooting stances)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban/Blader #1: 3! 2! 1!
Ichiban: Go... Shoot!! (His launcher glows brightly)
Max: My bey is gonna knock you out!
(Bahamut dashed at Icarus)
Ichiban: As if I'll let you.
(Icarus uses the Amaze driver to dodge)
Max: It's fast....
Ichiban: Now it's time to end this!
(Amaze driver's metal portion makes contact with the stadium and rushes towards Bahamut)
Ichiban: Time to finish this, Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Bahamut and bursts it)
Max (Gasps): What the heck!?
William: Unbelivable... Aviate Icaurs wins with a burst finish!
Ichiban (picks up his bey): Good joob, Icarus...
(Icarus shines and suddenly everything turns white and he founds himself in a white void)
Ichiban: W....Where am I?
(Icarus appears in front of him)
Ichiban: Is that you.... Icarus?
Icarus: That was exciting right?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yeah it was!
Icarus (Points towards him): You and I.... We will fly high and reach to the top!
Ichiban: Yeah! I know we will!
(Ichiban opens his eyes)
Ichiban (Looks at Max): So am I welcome here or not?
Max (Looks at him angrily): Why you....
??? (Pushes Max aside): Move away.
Ichiban: Huh? Who're you?
??? (Flips his hair): The captain of New Beigoma, Watashi Morita and what about you? Got a name?
Ichiban: It's Ichiban Aoi!
Max (Hesitantly): Aoi..? Are you related to Valt Aoi?
Ichiban: Yeah, he's my dad.
Watashi (Smiles): So you're Valt's brat huh? Why do you came here?
Ichiban: I heard the sound of beys so I came in!
Watashi (Leers at Ichiban): So you came here for a battle?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yup!
Watashi (Shows his bey): Set your eyes on Gloom Wendigo!
Ichiban (Gasps): You got a kiwami bey too?
Watashi: Yeah and it's a lot better than yours.
Ichiban (Takes out his launcher): You'll never find out without having a battle!
Watashi (Switches to lower mode): Watch out for your bey, It's a warning from God!
William: So he's gonna....
Max (mumbles): No don't say it loudly...
Ichiban: (What's going on here?)
William: First Battle! Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (throws his launcher up): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
Watashi (Catches his launcher with his left hand): Go... Shoot!
(Wendigo lands on the center of the stadium)
Ichiban (Gasps): What..?
Watashi: God's Warning!
(Wendigo's blades glows purple)
Ichiban: Go! Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Wendigo but it didn't moved)
Watashi: It's no use, Ichiban.
Ichiban (looks at Watashi): Huh?
Watashi: There's no bey in existence who can move Wendigo from the center.
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): Tch.. Icarus!!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
Ichiban: Amaze Strike!
(Amaze driver's metal portion cames in contact with the stadium and picks up speed)
Watashi (Smirks): Come at me with all you've got! It would make no difference!!
(Icarus hits Wendigo which creates a explosive cyclone around the stadium)
Ichiban (Screams): Icarus, Full power!!
(Icarus pushes Wendigo out of the stadium)
Watashi: What?
(Wendigo hits the ground before Icarus did)
William (Hesitantly): Aviate Icarus, Over Finish! The Score is 1-0!
Watashi (Smiles): So you're not that bad huh...?
Ichiban (Points his finger up): This time Wendigo's going to burst!
Watashi (Takes out his launcher): William, start the match!
William: R.. Right! Second Battle!
Ichiban (Switches to upper mode): Let's go!
Wakashi: (He switched to upper mode...)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (Throws his laucher up and thinks): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
William: (This time I'll use right one)
Ichiban: Go....
William (Catches his launcher with his right hand): Shoot!!
Ichiban: (He used his right hand?!)
Watashi: Devil's Awakening!
(Wendigo lands on the edge of the stadium and glows brightly)
Ichiban: Let's go, Icarus! Send Wendingo out of the stadium!
(Icarus heads towards Wendingo with full speed)
Watashi (Unleashes his aura): Wendigo!!
(Wendigo appears from the bright purple aura)
Watashi: Moment Crash!
(Wendigo uses the edge and crashes towards Icarus and sends it flying)
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): I'm not going to lose! Icarus!
(Icarus's eyes shines)
Icarus: Leave this to me!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
(Icarus hits the wall of the stadium and survives)
Ichiban: Let's go! Amaze Flash!!
(Icarus rides the edge of the stadium and gains incredible amount of speed)
Watashi: Crush him, Wendigo!
(Wendigo's avatar uses his axe to attack)
Ichiban: Icarus!!
(Icarus and Wendigo collides with each other which creates a huge explosion which broke all the windows of the academy)
Watashi: Burst him!
Ichiban: In your dreams!
(Icarus and Wendigo clashed again and again and again)
Ichiban: Aviate.... Slash!!
(Icarus's four blades begins to shine and sends Wendigo sky high)
Watashi: (Gasps)
Ichiban: All right!
(Suddenly Icarus's glowing begins to dim and it starts to wobble on the center)
Ichiban: W.. What's wrong?
Watashi: Looks like it's my turn now! Gloom Dive!!
(Wendigo dives on Icarus with full force and bursts Icarus)
Ichiban (Gasps): This can't be....
William: Gloom Wendigo, Burst Finish! With the score of 2-1, Wakashi Morita wins the match!
Watashi: What's wrong? Where is your sweet smile?(Laughs)
(Ichiban picks up Icarus and assembles it)
Wakashi: Your name Ichiban might means "The Best" but I guess there's no accounting for taste!
Ichiban: Huh?
Wakashi: I guess we should start calling him Ichi-bad, am I right (laughs)
(Everyone starting laughing at Ichiban)
Ichiban: Hehe.... That's not funny at all!!
???: That's enough!
Wakshi (looks at him): It's you.... Fubiki Sumie-san.
Ichiban (looks a Fubuki): That's Fubuki Sumie?
(To be Continued)
Read this after reading the chapter:
I wanted to add more details and make the battle more longer. Which I couldn't cuz my exams have started and I will post chapters more late because of that.
I'll think about it.
A couple grammar mistakes and typos and a mix-up between Watashi and William in a couple places, nothing major. Well done otherwise! Is Morita as Watashi's last name coincidental or intentional? BTW, hope you do well on your exams!
Thanks! And Watashi's last name Morita was coincidental, Morita means forest (Wendigo is the spirit of forest)
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - LJ-Blader - Aug. 09, 2021
Really good, I not going to repeat what was said above, but I really would like to see the avatars appearances explained as that is one of my favorite parts.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Kiryu Kazuma - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 4:43 PM)LJ-Blader Wrote: Really good, I not going to repeat what was said above, but I really would like to see the avatars appearances explained as that is one of my favorite parts.
I did posted their pics, see the above post.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - UnseenBurst - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 3:13 PM)Kiryu Kazuma Wrote: Chapter 2:
Chapter 2: God? Demon!? Gloom Wendigo!
(At Ichiban's home)
Valt (looks at Ichiban): Geez even I don't slept so long when I was at his age....
Valt: (Says loudly): Wake up, Ichi!
Ichiban (wakes up): Huh? What time is it?
(He looks at the clock)
Ichiban: It's 3'o clock....
(Flashback starts)
Chikara: You know.... I got scouted by BC Sol.
Chikara: Well I'll See you tomorrow, Ichi.
(Flashback ends)
Ichiban: Oh no I'm late!
Valt: Late? For what?
(He picks up Icarus and lefts to find Chikara)
Ichiban (While running): I hope he'll be still there!
(He looks at the park)
Ichiban: He's not here....
(He looks at the bey stadium)
Ichiban: Not even here!
(While looking for him, he reached New Beigoma Academy)
Ichiban (Hears the sound of beys bursting): That sound....
(He enters inside and founds so many bladers having a battle with each other)
Ichiban: Amazing....
Blader #1: Hey you can't just barge in here!
Ichiban: Am I not welcome here?
Blader #2: Only the strongest bladers are welcome here. So yo-
Ichiban (Shows off his bey): Then you can try me right now!
Blader #1 (looks at Blader #2): Hey William, Is that a...
William: You're right Max... It's a Kiwami Bey...
Ichiban : Yeah, so what do ya guys say?
Max (Takes out his launcher): We're gonna test you in a battle, and see if you're worthy of a Kiwami Bey or not!
(Both of them takes their positions near the stadium)
Max (Shows off his bey): Vanish Bahamut will be your opponent!
Ichiban (changes to lower mode and smiles broadly): Bring it on!
Max: I'm going to wipe that stupid grin from your face!
William: I'll the ref, First Battle!
(Both of them takes their shooting stances)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban/Blader #1: 3! 2! 1!
Ichiban: Go... Shoot!! (His launcher glows brightly)
Max: My bey is gonna knock you out!
(Bahamut dashed at Icarus)
Ichiban: As if I'll let you.
(Icarus uses the Amaze driver to dodge)
Max: It's fast....
Ichiban: Now it's time to end this!
(Amaze driver's metal portion makes contact with the stadium and rushes towards Bahamut)
Ichiban: Time to finish this, Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Bahamut and bursts it)
Max (Gasps): What the heck!?
William: Unbelivable... Aviate Icaurs wins with a burst finish!
Ichiban (picks up his bey): Good joob, Icarus...
(Icarus shines and suddenly everything turns white and he founds himself in a white void)
Ichiban: W....Where am I?
(Icarus appears in front of him)
Ichiban: Is that you.... Icarus?
Icarus: That was exciting right?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yeah it was!
Icarus (Points towards him): You and I.... We will fly high and reach to the top!
Ichiban: Yeah! I know we will!
(Ichiban opens his eyes)
Ichiban (Looks at Max): So am I welcome here or not?
Max (Looks at him angrily): Why you....
??? (Pushes Max aside): Move away.
Ichiban: Huh? Who're you?
??? (Flips his hair): The captain of New Beigoma, Watashi Morita and what about you? Got a name?
Ichiban: It's Ichiban Aoi!
Max (Hesitantly): Aoi..? Are you related to Valt Aoi?
Ichiban: Yeah, he's my dad.
Watashi (Smiles): So you're Valt's brat huh? Why do you came here?
Ichiban: I heard the sound of beys so I came in!
Watashi (Leers at Ichiban): So you came here for a battle?
Ichiban (Smiles): Yup!
Watashi (Shows his bey): Set your eyes on Gloom Wendigo!
Ichiban (Gasps): You got a kiwami bey too?
Watashi: Yeah and it's a lot better than yours.
Ichiban (Takes out his launcher): You'll never find out without having a battle!
Watashi (Switches to lower mode): Watch out for your bey, It's a warning from God!
William: So he's gonna....
Max (mumbles): No don't say it loudly...
Ichiban: (What's going on here?)
William: First Battle! Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (throws his launcher up): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
Watashi (Catches his launcher with his left hand): Go... Shoot!
(Wendigo lands on the center of the stadium)
Ichiban (Gasps): What..?
Watashi: God's Warning!
(Wendigo's blades glows purple)
Ichiban: Go! Icarus!
(Icarus slams on Wendigo but it didn't moved)
Watashi: It's no use, Ichiban.
Ichiban (looks at Watashi): Huh?
Watashi: There's no bey in existence who can move Wendigo from the center.
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): Tch.. Icarus!!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
Ichiban: Amaze Strike!
(Amaze driver's metal portion cames in contact with the stadium and picks up speed)
Watashi (Smirks): Come at me with all you've got! It would make no difference!!
(Icarus hits Wendigo which creates a explosive cyclone around the stadium)
Ichiban (Screams): Icarus, Full power!!
(Icarus pushes Wendigo out of the stadium)
Watashi: What?
(Wendigo hits the ground before Icarus did)
William (Hesitantly): Aviate Icarus, Over Finish! The Score is 1-0!
Watashi (Smiles): So you're not that bad huh...?
Ichiban (Points his finger up): This time Wendigo's going to burst!
Watashi (Takes out his launcher): William, start the match!
William: R.. Right! Second Battle!
Ichiban (Switches to upper mode): Let's go!
Wakashi: (He switched to upper mode...)
William: Ready, Set!
Ichiban: 3!
Watashi (Throws his laucher up and thinks): 2!
Ichiban: 1!
William: (This time I'll use right one)
Ichiban: Go....
William (Catches his launcher with his right hand): Shoot!!
Ichiban: (He used his right hand?!)
Watashi: Devil's Awakening!
(Wendigo lands on the edge of the stadium and glows brightly)
Ichiban: Let's go, Icarus! Send Wendingo out of the stadium!
(Icarus heads towards Wendingo with full speed)
Watashi (Unleashes his aura): Wendigo!!
(Wendigo appears from the bright purple aura)
Watashi: Moment Crash!
(Wendigo uses the edge and crashes towards Icarus and sends it flying)
Ichiban (Unleashes his aura): I'm not going to lose! Icarus!
(Icarus's eyes shines)
Icarus: Leave this to me!
(Icarus appears from the bright white aura)
(Icarus hits the wall of the stadium and survives)
Ichiban: Let's go! Amaze Flash!!
(Icarus rides the edge of the stadium and gains incredible amount of speed)
Watashi: Crush him, Wendigo!
(Wendigo's avatar uses his axe to attack)
Ichiban: Icarus!!
(Icarus and Wendigo collides with each other which creates a huge explosion which broke all the windows of the academy)
Watashi: Burst him!
Ichiban: In your dreams!
(Icarus and Wendigo clashed again and again and again)
Ichiban: Aviate.... Slash!!
(Icarus's four blades begins to shine and sends Wendigo sky high)
Watashi: (Gasps)
Ichiban: All right!
(Suddenly Icarus's glowing begins to dim and it starts to wobble on the center)
Ichiban: W.. What's wrong?
Watashi: Looks like it's my turn now! Gloom Dive!!
(Wendigo dives on Icarus with full force and bursts Icarus)
Ichiban (Gasps): This can't be....
William: Gloom Wendigo, Burst Finish! With the score of 2-1, Wakashi Morita wins the match!
Watashi: What's wrong? Where is your sweet smile?(Laughs)
(Ichiban picks up Icarus and assembles it)
Wakashi: Your name Ichiban might means "The Best" but I guess there's no accounting for taste!
Ichiban: Huh?
Wakashi: I guess we should start calling him Ichi-bad, am I right (laughs)
(Everyone starting laughing at Ichiban)
Ichiban: Hehe.... That's not funny at all!!
???: That's enough!
Wakshi (looks at him): It's you.... Fubiki Sumie-san.
Ichiban (looks a Fubuki): That's Fubuki Sumie?
(To be Continued)
Read this after reading the chapter:
I wanted to add more details and make the battle more longer. Which I couldn't cuz my exams have started and I will post chapters more late because of that.
(Aug. 09, 2021 2:59 PM)PinkRose Wrote: Hmm, I don't know. Maru's not exactly the type to have a rivalry that intense as she dislikes heavy comeptitive-ness; so I can see them more as distant kinda-sorta friends or in a one-sided rivalrly on Shin's end. But if Kiryu Kazuma goes for that route, I wouldn't really mind.
I'll think about it.
Valt, stop lying, if your siblings didn't wake you up, you wouldn't wake up till midnight and Valt's brat? Excuse me, Valt's the number 1 Blader in the world. Just thought I'd vent about that, good chapter, work on grammar 
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - LegendJustice - Aug. 09, 2021
Great chapter, Valt is a liar tho….
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - UnseenBurst - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 5:30 PM)LegendJustice Wrote: Great chapter, Valt is a liar tho….
Valt has already gotten into the habit of lying to his children, *sighs* I thought you'd be better than this.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - LegendJustice - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 5:31 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 5:30 PM)LegendJustice Wrote: Great chapter, Valt is a liar tho….
Valt has already gotten into the habit of lying to his children, *sighs* I thought you'd be better than this.
Yup, who taught him how to parent?
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - UnseenBurst - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 5:48 PM)LegendJustice Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 5:31 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: Valt has already gotten into the habit of lying to his children, *sighs* I thought you'd be better than this.
Yup, who taught him how to parent?
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - LegendJustice - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 5:57 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 5:48 PM)LegendJustice Wrote: Yup, who taught him how to parent?
Why in the World would he accept that?
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Dread hades12 - Aug. 09, 2021
Idk but that basically screams Silas 🤣
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - UnseenBurst - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 6:00 PM)LegendJustice Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 5:57 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote:
Why in the World would he accept that?
Desperate times call for desperate measures
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - LegendJustice - Aug. 09, 2021
(Aug. 09, 2021 6:13 PM)UnseenBurst Wrote: (Aug. 09, 2021 6:00 PM)LegendJustice Wrote: Why in the World would he accept that?
Desperate times call for desperate measures
True, well let’s not get off topic tho
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Demon Belial - Aug. 09, 2021
I really like wendigo's avatar
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Kiryu Kazuma - Aug. 12, 2021
The Kiwami 3 (The bladers which are believed to be the strongest three who wields a Kiwami Bey)
1) Fiona Dela Hoya
Gender: Female
Bey: Zephyr Fafnir .7 Nl Sc -Mr
2) Light Sawashiro
Gender: Male
Bey: Sovereign Lucifer .11 Fl Ac -Rb
3) Chikara Arima
Gender: Male
Bey: Noble Centaur .3 Cu Ab -Se
I will add descriptions about Light and Fiona (and their beys) before their appearances.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Demon Belial - Aug. 12, 2021
That's a bot lol
My message did not showed up?
Kiryu Kazuma
(Aug. 12, 2021 8:25 AM)Kiryu Kazuma Wrote: The Kiwami 3 (The bladers which are believed to be the strongest three who wields a Kiwami Bey)
1) Fiona Dela Hoya
Gender: Female
Bey: Zephyr Fafnir .7 Nl Sc -Mr
2) Light Sawashiro
Gender: Male
Bey: Sovereign Lucifer .11 Fl Ac -Rb
3) Chikara Arima
Gender: Male
Bey: Noble Centaur .3 Cu Ab -Se
I will add descriptions about Light and Fiona (and their beys) before their appearances.
I cannot post.... Is it a bug?
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Kiryu Kazuma - Aug. 12, 2021
Is that a bug? Demon Belial you mentioned me, but I can't see the post.
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - GenesisBlader - Aug. 12, 2021
good god i hate spamming on threads that dont even apply to the theme
nice chapters!
RE: Beyblade Burst: Kiwami! - Demon Belial - Aug. 12, 2021
Ah it's fixed.
|
![[Image: Icarus.jpg]](https://i.ibb.co/3YQGQkw/Icarus.jpg)
![[Image: Lucifer.jpg]](https://i.ibb.co/zRrLNMn/Lucifer.jpg)
![[Image: tumblr-pg5dfq-T3rk1sn3ne4o4-500.jpg]](https://i.ibb.co/C1VFnfB/tumblr-pg5dfq-T3rk1sn3ne4o4-500.jpg)