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Delete - M.Pheles - Oct. 28, 2013
NVM this story!
RE: I like you'r Fro ! - LimiTTrickster - Oct. 28, 2013
Great spelling and good use of vocabulary. But I think you need to work on your grammar and punctuation, and also your paragraphing. This will make the story easear to read, and also make it pook neat. Also, try to stick to one tense. There was a lot of switching from past, present and future. Hope this helps.
RE: I like you'r Fro ! - RagerBlade - Oct. 28, 2013
It's a little short... Other than that and grammar it's good! Keep going!
RE: I like you'r Fro ! - M.Pheles - Oct. 29, 2013
Thanks guys! This really happened to me in real life lol. That's why it was hard to make Chapter 1, but I got some other things to put in.