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+--- Thread: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! (/Thread-Getting-Bullied-in-school-or-other-places-Tell-your-stories)
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Deikailo - Jan. 14, 2012
(Jan. 14, 2012 8:57 PM)Hazel Wrote: Implying that the education you gain in highschool isn't valuable for college is just absurd - and fundamentally flawed, since many college courses start off at a point that is at least after a portion of the course you would have learned in the High School years. I mean, yes, one can theoretically attend remedial college courses or go to a community college to get refreshers, but that is both a waste of time and money if you simply dedicate the effort toward your actual education. Moreover, given that barely any hand-holding occurs within a college setting, neglecting the information and time management skills High School is intended to offer will cause further issue, for most people.You are disgusting for implying that I am manipulating the system for personal gain while I continuously struggle to function with roughly 10% of my brain missing.
Special ed classes do not teach the same material as other classes their grade, and while it is mandated that IEP carry over, it is certainly not mandated that a college completely overlook the fact that you received an inferior education. You will be treated and handled differently for having those marks on your transcript, and that is the simple fact of it. In Communtiy Colleges, they tend not to care about anything at all, and actually quite often overlook even the most fatally flawed transcripts - but any application to a serious university, let alone any chances at getting a good scholarship to a serious university, will be scrutinized considerably more thoroughly.
Once you're out of highschool, even with an IEP, the university you are applying to's regulations and procedures take over completely. Many universities have departments for special education placement, and if you had a special needs course roster in High School, you will more than likely be planted in one in College, which WILL slow down your education, as opposed to actually applying yourself in highschool and doing what is necessary to keep up with the mainstream population.
It is an absolute fact that the fastest way to a scholarship, the best way into a good college, and the best way to ensure oneself a proper education is to apply themselves, not coast through like it doesn't matter.
If you're someone who actually needs special needs courses, that is one thing. If you are someone exploiting them to cruise through and think you're doing yourself a favor, you are disgusting.
Oh, and, furthermore: If your grades tanked in regular highschool courses - which you yourself claim are a "joke" - do you genuinely anticipate success in an environment that is considerably more stressful and critical?
If you are a special needs person, this is not implying that you are any dumber than others. It means you are given more attention and perhaps less homework and then help with that homework. You clearly do not understand what you're talking about when you insinuate that special education = retarded kids class. Sometimes kids with ADD (which, by the way, a majority of those kids who can't stay focused are above average in intellect) are there because they can't stay focused, which could even be from stress at home, not because they are any worse at absorbing information. There will never be accelerated courses (AP/Honors) offered to a special education class and by all means, if you want that on your high school transcript, go for it, but colleges will never see it as a special education course because a high school will not record it as that. They will put it down as standard geometry if you took a special education class.
Also, my grades tanked because of the homework involved. I could not read the text books because I have vision difficulties therefore I could not complete assignments in History and English. However, when I was in special education classes, they were able to answer all of my questions because there were fewer kids in the class to attend to. I was able to learn all the information verbally instead of visually.
And yes, primary school, middle school, and high school courses are a joke. A majority of it is impractical in day-to-day life and it solely exists as an eye opener for what our strengths and weaknesses are, a gateway to social interaction, and a means of teaching kids organization of time and commitment. I cannot tell you how many teachers and parents have told me this with an incredible amount of conviction. Tying it back to this thread, bullying is a classic school lesson because it never ends once you graduate. School is just a safer environment to learn the best methods of coping and dealing with it. Teachers are just a metaphor for your future boss or the police whereas the bullying can be a coworker or a citizen instead of being your peer in this case.
Why you even troll this thread is beyond me. If you really don't understand what you're talking about, why bother even posting false information or try to make opinion into fact?
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Vintage - Jan. 15, 2012
(Jan. 14, 2012 8:30 PM)Hazel Wrote:(Jan. 14, 2012 7:40 PM)Vulcan Blaze Wrote: It is good to make fun of people making fun of you.
If there is a single worse course of action than this mindset, I cannot think of it. The best thing one can do to verbal taunting is simply ignore it or report it.
I think that you're quite naive for thinking that ignoring or reporting verbal taunting will simple make it stop. This isn't a world where when people are ignored will back down, this is a world where they try even harder for that attention. I'd say that the best thing to do would be to acknowledge what they say, but not take it seriously. For me, I just don't care what other people think about me, because the most I'll see them is until the end of high school. I hear what they say, I think about whether or not it's true, but in the end, it's up to me whether or not I want to change myself for them. I mean, why should I care about what people who are insignificant in my life story. I've got my own things to do, while they waste their time trying to get into other peoples lives.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Hazel - Jan. 15, 2012
When did I claim that the intention was to make them back down? You're quite presumptuous, and hideously mistaken, for interpreting my post that way. It genuinely seems like you did not understand what I was saying or what I was responding to at all.
Acknowledging criticism does not make it stop, either... and the intention is not to make them back down, by ignoring them. I'm not sure why you would think that... people will taunt you for things. If you acqiuesce to the taunting, you're doing yourself a disservice. There is a solid chance reporting it will at least get them some comeuppance, and even if it doesn't, ignoring them entirely is still your best option, rather than making a fool of yourself and sinking to their level, which will more than likely provoke them - possibly to the point of making it more than verbal.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Kai-V - Jan. 15, 2012
Can we settle with just writing : "You are wrong, this is what I meant" instead of insulting each other ? We want to have a mature and civilised discussion, not insult throwing.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - 3-Dog - Jan. 15, 2012
Never, EVER ignore a bully. The whole 'tell the adult' thing tends not to work most of the time, because telling an adult ostracises you from your peers. I'm not saying I like it, but that's just the way things are.
Bullies thrive on finding victims they feel are weak and timid. It's meant to be an easy game for them, so if you stand your ground and show that you won't take their BS they're much more likely to leave you alone. If you let them push you around, you'll never see the end of it and it's much more difficult to retaliate once you've been identified as a target. Try and nip it in the bud.
I can't speak for the girls, but as a guy I can tell you that learning any form of self-defense and working out is very practical. Working out will give you a bigger body, which is a great asset to ward bullies away. If you LOOK like you can put up a fight, they're less likely to bother you and that's the prevention part of it. If anything ever goes down, you need to learn how to be able to handle yourself. Find a legit self-defense or martial art class, it'll come in handy later on in life. Knowing that you can defend yourself if required will give you confidence, which in turn will make you a much more difficult target for the bullies.
I used to get bullied a lot, but ever since I started working out and training in muay thai it gradually started decreasing until the point where the old bullies tried to be friends with me. Don't fall for the whole friendship thing though, keep people like bullies at a far distance. It's better to be alone than in bad company.
If you can't find any muay thai classes, I would suggest aiming for Krav Maga, Judo, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu or an MMA class if you can handle it. Try not to go for the flashy arts like Tae Kwon Do or Karate. They're cool but not practical for real situations unless you're a black belt, but that would take too long. You need to put a stop to the bullying as soon as you can. Stay strong.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Vintage - Jan. 15, 2012
(Jan. 15, 2012 4:22 AM)Hazel Wrote: When did I claim that the intention was to make them back down? You're quite presumptuous, and hideously mistaken, for interpreting my post that way. It genuinely seems like you did not understand what I was saying or what I was responding to at all.
Acknowledging criticism does not make it stop, either... and the intention is not to make them back down, by ignoring them. I'm not sure why you would think that... people will taunt you for things. If you acqiuesce to the taunting, you're doing yourself a disservice. There is a solid chance reporting it will at least get them some comeuppance, and even if it doesn't, ignoring them entirely is still your best option, rather than making a fool of yourself and sinking to their level, which will more than likely provoke them - possibly to the point of making it more than verbal.
To be honest, I cannot come close to comprehending what you are thinking. You just called me "presumptuous and hideously mistaken" for interpreting your post wrong, yet make points against me which I had not brought up. Since when does acknowledging people's criticism equal "making a fool of yourself and sinking to their level, which will more than likely provoke them - possibly to the point of making it more than verbal."
I hope you did not surmise a different meaning from my post, because, when I said "I'd say that the best thing to do would be to acknowledge what they say, but not take it seriously.", I mean take notice of what they say, but don't take what they say to heart. Because ignorance does nothing but make you seem conceited and that will push it past verbal abuse. I know this firsthand that ignoring a bully when being bullied does NOT work, it only adds more resentment. Do you want to know why? It's because of the thought that you're better than them that makes them angry. When a bully sees the very person they've bullied not even acknowledge their existence, they will become more savage. Bullies are only looking to satisfy themselves by getting a reaction out of you. If you ignore their verbal abuse, it has a higher risk of having the bully push it further than that. The only time ignoring a bully will have a chance at working, is before they begin to bully you. By coming off as strong-willed, bullies may back off.
Reporting will also be quite useless, as it's only a temporary retribution. Sooner or later, the adults will begin to think the bullying has settled, which is when it starts up again. It's not that reporting makes you seem weak, it's that too many times the adults don't do enough.
Here's what it comes down to. I know firsthand what it's like to be verbally bullied, and to the extent in which I now flinch at the very words and hate ever using or hearing them, and am extremely self conscious, and for a very long time, afraid to make friends, let alone talk to people. I've tried all the tips in the book that they teach you in school, so let me clear this up right now, telling the authorities is not going to work and ignoring them is not going to work. I'm not sure how it is with everybody else in the world that gets bullied, but for me, I had to do something about it. I stood up for myself, I fought for myself, and I got through it myself. All I know is that you have to take the initiative and do something about it.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - xSora10 - Jan. 16, 2012
(Jan. 13, 2012 6:06 AM)Shabalabadoo Wrote: You had a cell phone when you were 6?
To answer that, yes I did. My parents were divorced then...I needed a cell phone with my dad. Let's just say he's not the best guy in the world, in many aspects.
(Jan. 13, 2012 4:15 PM)Deikailo Wrote:(Jan. 13, 2012 6:13 AM)Hazel Wrote:I have heard of kids having cell phones as young as 3. There are circumstances such as nasty divorces where it becomes the only means of communication with their child.(Jan. 13, 2012 6:06 AM)Shabalabadoo Wrote: You had a cell phone when you were 6?
America.
Exactly. Plus, I had to be safe with my dad. Plus, he's getting weirder now...so I have to resort to locking my bedroom door and having my shoes with me next to my bed..
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - MFB Mad Master - Feb. 28, 2012
My whole class thinks I'm an ugly and annoying brat, ouch!
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - nationsbeyblade - Feb. 28, 2012
if anyone is f******g with you than you tell youre friends,older siblings but not youre parents or teachers they beat you up for that and i know,youre friends and older siblings can help you if youre about to get beat up seriously outnumbering them worcks like a charm,i know because it happend to me.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Goku911 - Feb. 28, 2012
I used to get bullied all the time. Just walk away and tell someone. I never told anyone. Don't make my mistake. And do not get physical. He/She will only pick on you if there intimadated or like you.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - nationsbeyblade - Feb. 28, 2012
if you tell people for me the bulliyng is getting worse now getting my friends is gonna be a problem because they are scared of the person that bullies me also my older sister is at university now i am losing it,my best friend is teaching me self defence so if he tries anything i will aleast try and put up a fight or i will just ignore it
never try this thinking holding youre anger up then letting it out at the person bulliyng you will work if you are gonna get angry or start crying walk away standing straight and proud and then when no one can see you, you can cry or shout because if the bully see's you crying he will mess with you even more
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - 3-Dog - Feb. 28, 2012
(Feb. 28, 2012 10:37 PM)Goku911 Wrote: I used to get bullied all the time. Just walk away and tell someone. I never told anyone. Don't make my mistake. And do not get physical. He/She will only pick on you if there intimadated or like you.
That's a very common misconception. People don't pick on you because they like you or are intimidated by you, dude. They do it to people they feel are weak so that they can feel powerful. If people are intimidated by you then they will never pick on you unless they're in a group or something, and even then it's rare. If people like you they're going to become friends with you, not bully you.
Bullies will make your life hell because you're an easy target. Ignoring them and 'walking away' will make it worse because they feel they can get away with it. If you tell your parents or a teacher it'll make you look even weaker. You need to be able to stand up for yourself if you want to stop being bullied. Let a bully push you around and you'll never hear the end of it.
Your mistake was not that you didn't tell anyone, your mistake was walking away and letting them get away with it.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Arupaeo - Feb. 28, 2012
You should always feel free to talk to your parents about things that are bothering you - bullying included. You can ask them not to get involved, but why on earth would you not talk to the people who love you the most?
If you are clear that all you want is advice or comfort, parents can be a huge help when you are dealing with something that is really difficult.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Hazel - Feb. 28, 2012
And if your dad happens to look like Kevin Smith after being hit with a gamma ray, maybe he shows up at school. Maybe he pretends to be the new kid in class who took hormones.
Maybe your bullying problem goes away when your six foot tall biker dad friend hangs around all the time.
But, really, Zain. Here, and every school I've ever gone to, bullies were not only much larger by tendency, but also tended to travel in packs of bullies, and while stereotyping may not be pretty, it is in this instance true - bullies were stupid. When dumb is intimidated, it will not ever respond with fear or friendship.
Standing up to a bully in any school I've ever been to meant having your face put into the deepest part of your school's plumbing. My solution worked out fine, and I never had a real problem with them - keep teachers in eye and earshot. Exaggerate the living hell out of any bruises you receive. Parents will file complaints, other parents will be called, teachers will be on high alert, etc.
Cowardice? Sure. But, bravery only means anything if you're a fireman, police officer, or Mel Gibson in a kilt.
"Stand up to the bully" is popular advice, and like most popular advice, it fails in the southern united states completely.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - 3-Dog - Feb. 28, 2012
If you can cope with living in constant fear then it's fine, but to me that aspect of being bullied was more terrifying than confronting the bullies. It was the worst feeling in the world to try to avoid my bullies, the shame of telling teachers who then would not do anything about it. I'll be honest, I was too proud to tell my parents. Couldn't face the shame of admitting to them that I was being bullied, which is wrong. You should be able to talk to your parents about it, that was a mistake that I made.
The only way I managed to stand up to my bullies was by working out (the entire reason I started working out in the first place was because I was being bullied) and also learning how to fight. Those two things give you more confidence. In a good martial arts class you learn how to defend yourself, you learn to be brave but you also learn not to be stupid. If you're outnumbered, run. Just don't let yourself be an easy target. Give yourself the 'look', don't show yourself as someone meek because bullies LOVE easy targets. It's purely something they do to feel powerful, in my opinion, and they're not gonna bully someone who they think will give them trouble.
The sooner you stand up to a bully, the better. If you don't do something about it, ANYTHING (this includes the other advice about telling a teacher) then it will get much, much worse as time goes by. You have to take action and be smart about it. Assess your situation. If you are being tormented by a pack of bullies, all of whom are more than ready to hurt you then don't stand up to them on your own with no teachers in sight.
If there's one person bullying you and you're not a complete loner, tell him where he can go. If he starts getting physical then defend yourself. I've seen people in this situation, I've seen them win and I've seen them get whooped, but the outcome is always the same: interaction stops. There's no bullying anymore. Both parties avoid each other cos they don't wanna fight again.
That scenario is more to solve the problem of bullying. If you want to prevent it then just try your best to look tough. As silly as it sounds, people found me a lot more intimidating after I shaved my head than when I had spiky hair. Just look the part, however you can, you don't have to shave your head. If you were a bully, would you go after the goofy kid with glasses and his pants up to his chest, or would you go after the gruff biker with the big leather jacket and a tattoo on his face? OK, bad idea, don't get a tattoo on your face, but you get the point.
Bullying can be extremely psychologically scarring, I know that personally as is probably blatant to see. It makes me so mad to hear about any of you guys getting bullied at school, don't let them get away with it. To them it's just a bit of fun but to you your entire life can start revolving around it. School is a big part of your lives, it's a difficult time period, you shouldn't have to be dealing with bullies along with all the other stuff, so do something about it that will stop it.
Whatever advice you follow, whether it's to stand up to them or tell the teachers and avoid them, do it now. Don't delay it. Be brave and hold your head high cos these schmucks bullying you now are gonna be cleaning public toilets whilst you graduate from university.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Shabalabadoo - Feb. 29, 2012
I'm lucky to be in a school where there's minimal bullying. What I have seen though, is that it's always the passive kid. Not about what they look like at all. Might be different for other locations on this planet, but that's what I notice. Being passive isn't really a great quality outside of school either, not that it is bad, but nothing's going to change in the rest of someone's life if they're very passive and quiet. Assertiveness gives a sense of a cool, easy to talk to, person. Not really what bullies pick up on. You can still be a super nice person and be assertive at the same time. Assertive isn't mean, and isn't a pushover personality. I've never seen someone who's confident about themselves be bullied. (although there are exceptions that I can think of, not necessarily fit for me to mention.)
So, what I'm saying is, my whole take on bullying was always to be kind to everyone, and have a personality that even bullies can get along with. That doesn't mean to be an carp, it means that if you need to do some gangster handshakes in the hallway to prevent bullying, why wouldn't you? "Wuddup", the response usually shouldn't be a kind, polite "hi" that you would say to your grandmother. Being polite is awesome, but there's a time and place for everything, and again, it's not unkind to say something other than hello or hi. Say wuddup back or something, if they said it, they won't find it offensive.
Walk with swag. It isn't being cocky, and bullies pick up on the way people walk. It's easy to tell a lot about somebody by the way they walk.
Don't act like you're in a grade two years younger. The goofy stuff was funny then, bullies just bully it now. Even having a friend or cousin or something in an older grade makes the bully feel like you're not that passive, easy to bully kid.
That's my whole take on bullying in general. I've never been bullied, and I believe it's because of how I've carried myself as a confident, assertive person. And if you're somebody who's not bullied, who has lots of friends, say hi to that kid that looks like a target for bullying. I do it all the time, I believe it helps, other people pick up on it. It might make that kid's day, and who knows, maybe even yours too.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Goku911 - Mar. 03, 2012
(Feb. 28, 2012 10:53 PM)Zain Wrote:Advice for the past does not help the future(Feb. 28, 2012 10:37 PM)Goku911 Wrote: I used to get bullied all the time. Just walk away and tell someone. I never told anyone. Don't make my mistake. And do not get physical. He/She will only pick on you if there intimadated or like you.
That's a very common misconception. People don't pick on you because they like you or are intimidated by you, dude. They do it to people they feel are weak so that they can feel powerful. If people are intimidated by you then they will never pick on you unless they're in a group or something, and even then it's rare. If people like you they're going to become friends with you, not bully you.
Bullies will make your life hell because you're an easy target. Ignoring them and 'walking away' will make it worse because they feel they can get away with it. If you tell your parents or a teacher it'll make you look even weaker. You need to be able to stand up for yourself if you want to stop being bullied. Let a bully push you around and you'll never hear the end of it.
Your mistake was not that you didn't tell anyone, your mistake was walking away and letting them get away with it.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - 3-Dog - Mar. 03, 2012
It helps others reading to prevent making the same mistakes that you did, and it also helps you in realising where you went wrong and making sure it doesn't happen again. Seriously dude, you have to understand that bullies don't pick on you because they're 'intimidated' or 'like' you. If they were intimidated, they'd be too scared to bully you. If they liked you they'd be your friend.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Dragoon. - Mar. 03, 2012
I was bullied in my school by my seniors just for back answering them.But they just warned me and left (i still dont understand y)
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Clonetos - Mar. 03, 2012
Well I had a LONG history of bullying and many stories to tell but I will only tell a few.
Back in 4th grade I was into pokemon and as such was immersed into it,This was before I could Tell from fantasy and reality (i was 8 ok?) But that isn't the problem what the problem was, was kids just saying "I killed pokemon" or "i ripped pikachu" and they were malicious and remember i was 8 i had no clue it was just paper and junk. They were cruel ripping cards, messing with toys and just laughing at me. Everyone did it EVEN highschoolers on buses! And this carp lasted til 7th grade!
Another one was when I was dating, Me and my girlfriend at the time were happy What wasn't funny was the fact guys tried to tick me off by saying the most obscene things. But the worst was this guy in pottery in 11th grade. He smiled and said "I did your girl" with that smug look i for one knew better and rolled my eyes and i replied "Whats her favorite flavour of icee?" the answer was of course cherry and blue raspberry but HE said this "(name) flavored" And that blew my top I almost hit that carp with a stool but the teacher stopped me
And those are just the icing on the cake for me sadly
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Goku911 - Mar. 03, 2012
(Mar. 03, 2012 1:14 PM)Zain Wrote: It helps others reading to prevent making the same mistakes that you did, and it also helps you in realising where you went wrong and making sure it doesn't happen again. Seriously dude, you have to understand that bullies don't pick on you because they're 'intimidated' or 'like' you. If they were intimidated, they'd be too scared to bully you. If they liked you they'd be your friend.Most of the time people only bully you because they are afraid of you and want to be tough like you.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Kai-V - Mar. 03, 2012
No, most of the time, people bully you because they found something different in you that they do not like and that they find ridiculous. Look at all the posts : Pokémon is something they can make fun of, glasses and "too good" grades are also something they can ridicule, etc. Obviously they have some frustrations, but I do not know why you are so reluctant to see that bullies do not bother people they are intimidated or scared of ... Actually, I might know why, but I will leave that to you.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - ljadams9 - Mar. 03, 2012
People also bully you if they see you as an easy target.
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Clonetos - Mar. 03, 2012
(Mar. 03, 2012 7:10 PM)Kai-V Wrote: No, most of the time, people bully you because they found something different in you that they do not like and that they find ridiculous. Look at all the posts : Pokémon is something they can make fun of, glasses and "too good" grades are also something they can ridicule, etc. Obviously they have some frustrations, but I do not know why you are so reluctant to see that bullies do not bother people they are intimidated or scared of ... Actually, I might know why, but I will leave that to you.
For me it was reactions they loved seeing me mad, I remember one time two punks were Messing with me and winslow (co host in my earlier vids and long time friend) back in highschool Heh well one day we had enough and we chased them to the locker room and beat the carp outta them but guess what? They ran off laughing like hyenas and the next day they continued the onslaught of throwing basket balls at us FOR NO REASONS other than to get a laugh
RE: Getting Bullied in school, or other places? Tell your stories! - Kai-V - Mar. 03, 2012
(Mar. 03, 2012 7:23 PM)ljadams9 Wrote: People also bully you if they see you as an easy target.
Exactly, that is the expression I was looking for. Bullies do not go to people who are intimidating or scary.