WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - Temporal - Aug. 08, 2011
We're getting down to the last three rounds! So, here are the stories!
Entry 1
Quote:I stared down my opponent, his red eyes piercing into my mind like a bullet though butter. He may not look like much, by behind those glasses and flaming red hair; there was a warrior waiting to be unleashed.
“Both bladders turn your backs!†The announcer called, “ready your beys!â€
I turned away from my opponent, but I could still feel him. Just knowing he was there was putting me on edge. I looked up from my bey and at the surrounding stadium. It wasn’t much, a small hall that was once used for meetings. Now it was a beyblade arena. Three separate stadiums were also built into the hall; one of them was occupied by a beginner blader trying to perfect his shoot. All other eyes were on me and my opponent. This was the semi-final, if I won this I would come first in a tournament of 20 people, and earn that face I wanted oh-so much. But standing in the way of that dream was a nearly immovable wall, my undefeated opponent. I had just scrapped through to this round while he had blitzed nearly all his matches, faltering only once for the Blader from Tokyo, whose bey beat him in one round. But with one simple switch of his beys’ height, my opponent had countered his combo and sent it spiralling down with the rest of the people who had lost to his might power. He may have the hidden secret of being able to change the height of his spin track, TH170, but I had a hidden plan. I formulated my bey, LightningLDragoSW145MF. Normally I would be using my main beys, I am no good with attack types. However this time, I needed the power and speed of an attacking bey to once and for all finish of this flaming menace. My plan was simple, he would be expecting a stamina bey because I had used one all throughout this tournament, and it would be the smartest thing to do. But he knew me, he knew I would try to trick him and use an attack type beyblade. He would use a rubber-based bottom like Rubber Sharp to counter it; or so I was counting on. But I was going to stall my attack type so his rubber based bottom would burn itself out and when I went in for the final attack, I could KO him easily. It was fool proof; there was no way I could lose.
Then why was I so nervous?
I turned to face my opponent, he had his bey on his launcher by the looks of it, but he was covering it so I cannot see what it is. I gritted my teeth and locked my bey into place.
‘It is done’ I thought. We readied our beys and on the count of ‘Three, two, one! Let it Rip!’
I let it rip, in more ways than one.
The second his bey made contact with the stadium I felt defeat crush me. He had tricked me! He had a Coat Sharp bottom on, and he had launched at an angle, so the CS went flying around the outside of the stadium, making direct contact with my poor LDrago and sent it flying into the air. I watched as it fell; fell downwards back into the stadium. It landed on a weird angle and just as it was about to go again, it was hit by my opponent’s bey making a second circle around the stadium.
“No!†I yelled as LDrago was smashed into the wall of the stadium, then hit again and slid dead into the bottom of the stadium. My plan had failed me, my decisive plan, in ruins. My LDrago lay, dented and battered in the bottom of the stadium, no life in it at all. My head hung slowly and I dropped to my knees. I closed my eyes, and waited. People cheered for my opponent, while I lay in the dirt, in defeat…
Entry 2
Quote: Chapter 2-A Great Loss
In a sense, we were free. In another, we were still shackled. By what, you ask? By our own ineptitude at surviving on our own. Luckily, Terrence knew his way around, not saying we didn’t get berated for being “idiots†to put it in his words. “Why the hell would you leave without knowing where you are going? Now that’s just dumb. Why are you running away in the first place?†I looked away from Terrence, though he had stuck with me all this time. “Are you sure you want to know? It’s kinda private…†Jan looked at me, suddenly solemn, and Terrence, who was confused. “You can tell us, right? No point in keeping secrets.†I breathed a shaky sigh. “Well, okay. It started a few years back.â€
6 Years ago…
“Okay, let’s go, Gil!†My Thunder Gil was relentlessly bashing my opponent’s Rock Orso, waiting for the right moment to win. I was eight, and the game of Beyblade was an amazing way to blow off steam and make some friends, of which I had few. Gil flew around the stadium, deftly avoiding hits as if they were trying to fully hit the falling snow. After about thirty seconds of dodging, my RSF-based opponent was losing spin. “Gil! Let’s get this over with!†Gil headed right for the middle, cleanly KOing its opponent. As I picked up my beyblade, something changed. The atmosphere had become thicker, and something filled me with dread. Panicked, I hurried home, wanting to run into my parents’ arms, to be safe. Alas, it was not to be.
I screeched to a halt, amazed at the parade of news vehicles and police cars. I think I knew what had happened, but in denial, I thought, “Oh? My parents became City Council members or something? I’ll go congratulate them!†I was about to go under the police line when a cop stopped me. “Kid… You can’t be here. If you know a kid named Alfreid, then…†“That’s me. I’m in the third grade! This is my friend, Thunder Gil!†The cop’s eyes began to tear up. “Oh, geez. I can’t tell this little kid… Anna! You’ve got to explain this one to him! I did it last time. You’ll have my letter of resignation in the morning!â€
A lady cop walked by and spoke with the first officer. He handed her his badge, constantly shaking his head and pointing at me, then the house. I was confused, so I twiddled with the nametag I wore for today’s trip to the aquarium at school. Before long, the man stormed off, leaving his badge. I wondered why.
"You’re Alfreid?†I nodded. “I’m eight years old, and I’m in the third grade. This is my best friend, Thunder Gil. Say hi, Gil!†I looked at the cop. “Gil says hi.†She smiled, sending a wave of warmth throughout my body. “Hi there, Gil. Listen… Erm… How do I explain this? While you were at school, something…happened.†I nodded. “I know.†“You know?†I nodded again. “My parents became important people, so the cops and news people had to come to keep an eye on them, right?†The lady started to cry a bit. “Oh, geez. You’ll understand when you get older, but…your mama and papa were really brave people. Someone was getting robbed, and they stood up for them. They beat up the bad man, but…well… The bad man cheated. You see, your mama was pregnant…†“I know, I get to name the baby if it’s a girl. I like the name ‘Angel’, but your name’s nice too. I think I’ll name her ‘Anna’!†The cop continued, her eyes becoming even tearier as she spoke. “Well, this very bad man thought that he really wanted this phone he was stealing, so he…†She choked up, barely able to continue.
“What did the bad man do? Did Papa kick his butt? He said he’d do that to me if I ever stoled something. Maybe he REALLY needed a phone so he could call HIS mama and papa. Mama always said you have to understand other peoples’ circumstincers.†“Circumstances, you mean?†“Yeah, that’s it. She said that the week after she got me Gil.†The lady was really on the verge of breaking down. “I’m SO going to retire tomorrow. This isn’t the job for me… Hell, I’m just a rookie, I’m only twenty-five!†“It’s okay, everything gets better, right? Mama said that once, and then we didn’t have to move ‘cause Papa got to keep his job.†“Come with me. I think I might have something for you.†She led me into a police station, and went to talk with the supervisor. From the room, I could hear the supervisor, who was very angry for some reason.
“Hell no, you can’t adopt the kid! What the hell are you thinking?†“Sir, with all due respect, it’s not your call. I’m going to file the paperwork and my resignation papers today. You’ll have your letter tomorrow. Besides, your idiocy with sending out rookies already got to Mike; he's gone, and I don't think he's going to even get a chance to get a job elsewhere. I’m not gonna be next. This kid’s parents were shot, and he IDOLIZES them, like all eight year-olds used to. He’s a good kid, and a foster home would destroy the poor…†Huh? Mama? Papa? Shot? What nonsense was this? They couldn’t have been… “Mama… Papa…†The weight of the situation hit me. I was an orphan. Knowing this, I began to cry.
Anna, who I was beginning to trust, poked her head out of the door. “Oh, geez, Chief! Look what you’ve done! The kid overheard that, you idiot!†The old, mean looking, fat man grumbled. “Not my problem.†I looked at him, furious, willing my small legs to move so I could kick him or something. I didn’t have to. Anna reached up and slapped the supervisor across the face. “Fat carp. I’ll have you demoted for that one. That’s a promise.â€
She turned and reached a hand out for me. “Alfried, I know that you heard what that fatty and I were talking about, but I have a question. I always wanted a kid, but sadly, I’m not married. I was thinking of adoption, so I have to ask: If these papers pan out right, which they should, would you want to live with me?†I looked at the lady’s face. Sincere, like an angel’s. Or, my impression of an angel at the time. I nodded, wiping tears from my face. Anna, at a loss for words, pulled me into an embrace that I wished could last forever. My world had shattered, and this lady was trying to put it back together, piece by piece. “Don’t worry, I’m here for you.†And she was. By the time three months had passed, the nightmares stopped. After six, I became more comfortable. After a year, I had to stop myself from calling her ‘Mama’, much to Anna’s dismay. After a year and a half, I didn’t care: I did call her “Mamaâ€, even in public, which she was ecstatic about. At two years, she was my best friend, along with Gil. By three? I was back off to a foster home.
The bank Anna had found a new job at had been robbed. Anna was shot because her police training took hold and she shot the robber in the leg so he couldn’t run away, though not before he shot her…in the face. Just like that, I was back where I started. No…I think I may have thought more highly of Anna than I did of my parents, who I’m starting to forget. I may have been even worse off. Why the hell did I have to lose so much over monetary gain? Unfortunately, when you THINK you’ve hit rock bottom, you probably haven’t. Naturally, I hadn’t. I bounced from one failed foster family to the next, never finding a home. At night, I whimpered, missing my parents, and especially missing Anna.
The first family:
“This kid’s weird. He’s always whimpering something about some Anna chick. Bah, you can keep him.†The kids there didn’t like me either, to be fully square. I was sent back.
The second family:
“Agh, he’s somewhat intelligent, but he’s always got that stupid top with him! Geez, it’s so annoying. It's like he just doesn't CARE whether he's got the potential to do something. Keep him, we don’t want this kid.†I was sent back yet again. I was becoming more and more scared.
The third family:
“Oh, damn. He’s got that top thing again. You’d think that he’d be a bit tougher, but he’s not. All he does is read, write, play at the park with that top, and talk about this person named ‘Anna’. Who the hell is Anna?†Again, I wasn’t wanted. This time, it was a sad departure. I had fun with one of the lady’s kids, named Jan. Regardless, I had to say goodbye. I was sent back.
The fourth family:
“… Why the hell would we want HIM?†I never even got to set foot in the house. I was becoming dismayed and distraught.
The fifth family lasted longer, but they would always tell me to "grow up", and I had heard the recent calls to the Home. I sensed that I wasn’t wanted, and so I left of my own free will.
The announcement was made by local authorities. I was ordered detained if found. Not going to happen. I'm never going back to the foster home. Never again. First to five wins, usual rules.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - .:J:. - Aug. 08, 2011
entry 2, pretty good idea and i like the start, even though entry 1 was good aswell
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - Temporal - Aug. 08, 2011
It seems as if this is the last Quarterfinals match. Vote!
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - Sparta - Aug. 08, 2011
Entry two did very well with putting the theme into use. Rather than interpreting it as loosing a beyblade match, the author chose to have him lose so many families that the main character comes to a decision.
Very well done, entry 2. I cast my vote there.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - SwiftShadow - Aug. 09, 2011
I vote for entry 2. Both entries are very well written, but I just happened to like entry two better. I really like the word choice of entry two also.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - TenshouTsubasa - Aug. 09, 2011
Entry 2.
I found some error in Entry 1- He wrote 'bladder' instead of 'blader'.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - Temporal - Aug. 09, 2011
Entry 2 leads 4-0. Again, we may have a turnaround on our hands, it's happened before.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - TenshouTsubasa - Aug. 09, 2011
My battle?
Anyway, Maybe it is a 5-0 or a 4-5, but I doubt the last one will happen.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - TITAN - Aug. 09, 2011
You know, I've also got to give it to entry 2. 1 was still pretty good, despite the bladders, entry 2 was better.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - Temporal - Aug. 09, 2011
Game. Entry two was me. I have to say, SDC's entry was pretty good.
RE: WBO Writing Tournament Quarter Finals! Temporal vs. SDamon Cronus! - .:J:. - Aug. 09, 2011
nice temporal, how many round left? cause when your tournament is done i'll post mine! also after that i'm planning on doing a beyblade design competition, want to help judge that too?
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