The Lifeless Blader: The Sequel [PLEASE CLOSE] - Resonated_ - Jan. 04, 2014
This is a sequel to 'The Lifeless Blader" a story my friend Damaged and I wrote. Please tell me how you like it.
Prologue
"Uchi!" I heard a voice say "Uchi!" it yelled again. I slowly opened my eyes to find Iliana standing over me. I looked around to find myself in what appeared to be a hospital room, at my bedside laid a mountain of flowers and get well cards, most of them from Iliana.
"Hey Iliana" I muttered. Tears sprung up in her pale green eyes. I was suddenly embraced in a hug.
"Don't you ever scare me like that again do you hear me!" She yelled as her arms squeezed me tighter.
In her warm embraced I looked down at my fingers, my nails were long and talon-like and my emover hair reached down to my shoulder.
"How long have I been out?" I asked as Iliana stopped hugging me.
"It's been five months since the fight" She muttered as I suddenly flashed back.
"There was a loud bang" I started "Was I shot?" asked.
Iliana nodded, I scanned the room for my bey. "Where is Cerberus?" I asked her.
"It was destroyed, th-the person who shot you, h-he just kept firing at you like a maniac" Iliana said as she started cry again.
"I-I bought you this new one" she said as she wiped away her tears and handed me a wrapped box. I delicately opened it. "It's a Genbull Ray ED145WD" She stated as I pulled it out of the box.
The bey looked strange "What kind of bey is this?" I questioned her. "This isn't MFB" I pointed out.
"It's a Zero-G system Bey" She informed me. "The system just came out a month ago" she added. "Everyone on the team has one" she said as she pulled out her bey. "I got a Revizer Libra E230SD" She explained.
"How about a battle then?" I asked getting up out of my hospital bed.
"You just woke up from a five month coma, I don't think your ready to put stress on you body" she implied.
I ignored her and stood up. "See I'm totally fine" I said.
**********************************************************************************************************
"Are you sure you wanna do this?" Iliana asked with concern.
"I'm sure" I said annoyed.
"3..... 2...... 1! GOOOO SHOOT!!" we both yelled. As we launched our beys into the rehabilitation center's bey stadium.
"Lets go Libra!, Twin Shield smash!" Iliana yelled using her special move right off the bat.
"I guess I'll have to come up with a special move," I thought to myself. "Special move!" I yelled " Dark sea Black Hunting" I screamed.
Genbull Ray shot streams of black lightning at Libra sending it in the air, and suddenly a giant sting ray made of black lightning appeared and lashed Libra with it's tail sending it flying out of the stadium.
Iliana sulked as Libra fell next to her. Ray jumped into my hand as I held it out and it continued spinning.
I squeezed it until it stopped spinning and then walked around the stadium until I stood next to Iliana.
"That was a good match, it feels good to battle again" I said.
Iliana raised her head "Well I guess I should catch you up on what happened while you were out" she said.
Here is how you should make a character request.
Name:
Age:
Personality:
Bio:
Bey: (Can be made up)
Special Moves: (With decription)
RE: The Lifeless Blader: The Sequel [Accepting character requests] - Mitsu - Jan. 04, 2014
(Jan. 04, 2014 10:33 PM)Onyx Piravteer Wrote: This is a sequel to 'The Lifeless Blader" a story my friend Damaged and I wrote. Please tell me how you like it.
Prologue
"Uchi!" I heard a voice say "Uchi!" it yelled again. I slowly opened my eyes to find Iliana standing over me. I looked around to find myself in what appeared to be a hospital room, at my bedside laid a mountain of flowers and get well cards, most of them from Iliana.
"Hey Iliana" I muttered. Tears sprung up in her pale green eyes. I was suddenly embraced in a hug.
"Don't you ever scare me like that again do you hear me!" She yelled as her arms squeezed me tighter.
In her warm embraced I looked down at my fingers, my nails were long and talon-like and my emover hair reached down to my shoulder.
"How long have I been out?" I asked as Iliana stopped hugging me.
"It's been five months since the fight" She muttered as I suddenly flashed back.
"There was a loud bang" I started "Was I shot?" asked.
Here is how you should make a character request.
Name:
Age:
Personality:
Bio:
Bey: (Can be made up)
Special Moves: (With decription) Just wondering, Why didn't you just stick to your old thread? You could of just changed the title of the thread.
RE: The Lifeless Blader: The Sequel [Accepting character requests] - Resonated_ - Jan. 04, 2014
Sorry I'm relatively new to the site I'll be sure to do that next time.
RE: The Lifeless Blader: The Sequel (Chapter 1 is Up!) [Accepting character requests] - Resonated_ - Jan. 06, 2014
I got chapter 1 done!
Iliana nodded, I scanned the room for my bey. "Where is Cerberus?" I asked her.
"It was destroyed, th-the person who shot you, h-he just kept firing at you like a maniac" Iliana said as she started cry again.
"I-I bought you this new one" she said as she wiped away her tears and handed me a wrapped box. I delicately opened it. "It's a Genbull Ray ED145WD" She stated as I pulled it out of the box.
The bey looked strange "What kind of bey is this?" I questioned her. "This isn't MFB" I pointed out.
"It's a Zero-G system Bey" She informed me. "The system just came out a month ago" she added. "Everyone on the team has one" she said as she pulled out her bey. "I got a Revizer Libra E230SD" She explained.
"How about a battle then?" I asked getting up out of my hospital bed.
"You just woke up from a five month coma, I don't think your ready to put stress on you body" she implied.
I ignored her and stood up. "See I'm totally fine" I said.
**********************************************************************************************************
"Are you sure you wanna do this?" Iliana asked with concern.
"I'm sure" I said annoyed.
"3..... 2...... 1! GOOOO SHOOT!!" we both yelled. As we launched our beys into the rehabilitation center's bey stadium.
"Lets go Libra!, Twin Shield smash!" Iliana yelled using her special move right off the bat.
"I guess I'll have to come up with a special move," I thought to myself. "Special move!" I yelled " Dark sea Black Hunting" I screamed.
Genbull Ray shot streams of black lightning at Libra sending it in the air, and suddenly a giant sting ray made of black lightning appeared and lashed Libra with it's tail sending it flying out of the stadium.
Iliana sulked as Libra fell next to her. Ray jumped into my hand as I held it out and it continued spinning.
I squeezed it until it stopped spinning and then walked around the stadium until I stood next to Iliana.
"That was a good match, it feels good to battle again" I said.
Iliana raised her head "Well I guess I should catch you up on what happened while you were out" she said.
RE: The Lifeless Blader: The Sequel (Chapter 1 is Up!) [Accepting character requests] - Themeeny7 - Jan. 08, 2014
It seems rushed. Try and add more detail.
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