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+--- Thread: Fan Fiction chapter one a new hero (/Thread-Fan-Fiction-chapter-one-a-new-hero)
chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 18, 2020
Let go amaterios
To be a hero is not easy that what my that's what my grandfather used to say, my name is
Max Slayer and this is my story, i just arrived at my destination Spain the home of BC Sol
I looked down at the letter that BC sol sent me,i almost freaked out when I realized I was a day,early.so I decided to go to the local mall to get something to eat, I decided to get me a hamburger, after I got my food I start to walk through the mall as I was walking i accidentally bumped into someone, she started to fall i caught her, she look up at me in shock, I helped her get back up she ask me who I was, I responded i am MAX Slayer a upcoming Beyer, i was supposed to be here tomorrow for BC Sol unfortunately, i got here a day early so I decided to stop and get some food and then go to BC sol about where I'm going to stay and I was hoping to talk to the manager to explain what happened she stood up and said no worry because you ran in to the right person I am the manager, of BC Sol my name is Kristina Kuroda ,I was surprised, almost in disbelief so we started walk back, to BC Sol so I asked her what she was doing at the mall, she responded to get new clothes and shoes, we shortly arrive at BC Sol she took me to her office ,to explain some things ,she explained where I was staying and what I was going to do, since I arrived early, she said I was going to do a test against other Bladers, just to see how strong iWas because I was a day early, we got to the training area it look like my old school gym, but brand new, the first person to challenge me was a kid, and his bey bushin Valkyrie 0 expand atomic, so then I pull out My Bey amaterios, we start the battle the, ref counts down 3-2-1 let it rip both of are beys launched into the stadium, bushin Valkyrie takes the center, amaterios starts going around the stadium really fast, I decide to end the battle fast, I decide to use burning drift,my bey started to lean and the rubber on my driver hit the stadium, and went straight for the bey in the middle ,it hit the bey and it and it bursts the kid looks shocked and said how could I have lost, I put my hand out and said it was a good battle, he stood up and said yeah it really was, he left and I said who's next.
RE: chapter one a new hero - GreenK9148 - May. 18, 2020
(May. 18, 2020 2:09 PM)sans the man Wrote: To be a hero is not easy that what my that's what my grandfather used to say, my name isDo you have a name for your story yet? I see a lot of grammar issues though.
Max Slayer and this is my story i just arrived at my destination Spain the home of BC Sol
I looked down at the letter that BC sol gave me,i almost freaked out when I realized I was a day,early.so I decided to go to the local mall to get something to eat, I decided to get me a hamburger, after I got my food I start to walk through the mall as I was walking accident bumped into someone, she started to fall i caught her, she look up at me in shock, I helped her get back up she ask me who I was, I responded i am MAX Slayer a upcoming Beyer, i was supposed to be here tomorrow for BC Sol unfortunately, i got here a day early so I decided to stop and get some food and then go to BC sol about where I'm going to stay and I was hoping to talk to the manager to explain what happened she stood up and said no worry because you ran in to the right person I am the manager, of BC Sol my name is Kristina Kuroda ,I was surprised, almost in disbelief so we started walk back, to BC Sol I asked her what she was doing at the mall, she responded to get new clothes and shoes, we shortly arrive at BC Sol she took me to her office ,to explain some things ,she explained where I was staying and what I was going to do, since I arrived early, she said I was going to do a test against other Bladers, just to see how strong i
Was because I was a day early, we got to the training area it look like my old school gym, but brand new, the first person to challenge me was a kid, and his bey bushin Valkyrie 0 expand atomic, I pull out My Bey amaterios, we start the battle the, ref counts down 3-2-1 let it rip both of are beys launched into the stadium, bushin Valkyrie takes the center, amaterios starts going around the stadium really fast, I decide to end the battle fast, I decide to use burning drift my, bey started to lean and the rubber on my driver hit the stadium, and went straight for the bey in the middle ,it hit the bey and it and it bursts the kid looks shocked and said how could I have lost, I put my hand out and said it was a good battle, he stood up and said yeah it really was, he left and I said who's next.
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 18, 2020
well i was nevre the best at grammar
RE: chapter one a new hero - Jdog757 - May. 18, 2020
Pretty good just like green said there where some grammar issues you put "my, bey" which confused me so I just suggest you check over stories before you create them just so they are easier to read
RE: chapter one a new hero - DeceasedCrab - May. 18, 2020
Use One thread for your fanfiction. One. Don't make more than one.
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 18, 2020
here's a little spoiler Max is going to fight free delahoya in chapter 2 with his new bey Mirage fafnir
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 20, 2020
chapter two a new hero
A new rival a new battle
IT’s been a long day of training I finally get to rest, it was nighttime so I decided to go sleep,I was thinking how excited I was, to meet the rest of my team i heard it's going to be Pro Blader only the best of the best,as I was falling asleep I thought someone passed my door,I forgot that I had the door open I meant to close it,so I decided to go after whoever it was that passed my door,I made it outside and followed the figure Into the Woods,I end up coming up face-to-face with a deer,it looked at me and tilts his head to the side,I was in shock because I never seen a deer do that,i before,it Runaway but i thought I heard bey being launch,I go to check out the noise,I finally found where the noise was coming from,I look to see free delahoya training with his bey,I was just surprised just to see him,without a moment's hesitation I ran up and introduce myself,I said hi my name is Max Slayer,I am the newest member of BC Sol,but he didn't seem to care,the only thing he had on his faced was a blank expression,so I challenged him to a Bey battle,he looked at me and said okay,I took out my launcher but free didn't take out his launcher,I already knew what he was going to do,he was going to hand spin his bey,I told him don't even try I already know what you about to do,he gave me a smirk and he said okay then,and then he asked me are you ready to burst by Mirage fafnir,and I said I I'm not losing,we both countdown 3-2-1 let it rip,he launched his Bey hard,free yelled out to fafnir use nothing break,it went flying around the Stadium,it caught up to amaterios and knocked it out the stadium,I was surprised i step back in shock of what just happened,free look at and said one point from me,I look back at him and said I can't wait to knock that smirk off your face,we launched again 3-2-1 let it rip,but this time I tilt my launcher to the center, as soon as my bey hit the Stadium floor i said amaterios use burning drift,free look surprised to see how fast amaterios was moving,free yelled out to fafnir use Mirage claw,our beys collided, and a burst of energy,after it was over amaterios bursted then Mirage fafnir bursts,me and free were shock,free looked at me and said not half bad,and then he left I was about to go after him but I decided to go on to bed,because I was tired,even though I lost I still burst fafnir,and that itself was an accomplished on it’s own.
RE: chapter one a new hero - DeceasedCrab - May. 20, 2020
sans the man you are hereby requested to cease direct messaging people encouraging them to read your fanfic. They will read it if the want to. Do not spam them, that's against the rules.
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 20, 2020
no all im trying to do is how to post my fanfic so pel don't bannde me
but he my friends
RE: chapter one a new hero - Nitrogenic - May. 20, 2020
Aw man I already made a Sparking Amaterios but go ahead I guess
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 20, 2020
thank you Nitrogengenic
so who want a bad time megalovania intensifies
RE: chapter one a new hero - Jdog757 - May. 20, 2020
Kinda weird that a person who just started bursted free when he was at full power but ok, other then that it was pretty good
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 20, 2020
everyone's is a hypocrite,I'm just kidding
RE: chapter one a new hero - CheetoBlader - May. 20, 2020
(May. 20, 2020 2:02 AM)sans the man Wrote: everyone's is a hypocrite,I'm just kiddingHow are we hypocrites?
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 20, 2020
but free was not at full power all free did is use a move and that is
mas was the one at full power
so ya jdog757
ok it was a sans joke that y i say just kidding so you see now y cheetoblader
RE: chapter one a new hero - DeceasedCrab - May. 20, 2020
For real sans the man, I don't appreciate how often your posts break the rules. Do better. No more spam DMs, no more rudeness, and start using the pencil icon to edit your posts rather than making new one. This isn't a chatroom.
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 20, 2020
yes sir i will
and if i don't i guse you could say im going to have a bad time
RE: chapter one a new hero - DeltaZakuro - May. 20, 2020
(May. 20, 2020 3:03 AM)sans the man Wrote: yes sir i will
and if i don't i guse you could say im going to have a bad time
Great story so far
Also you're right, because Crab doesn't hold back when it comes to people who dont follow the rules
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - May. 20, 2020
thank you so much deltazakuro
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - Jun. 12, 2020
it's ya boi sans
RE: chapter one a new hero - GreenK9148 - Jun. 12, 2020
(Jun. 12, 2020 7:14 PM)sans the man Wrote: it's ya boi sans
Are you going to post anything?
RE: chapter one a new hero - sans the man - Jun. 13, 2020
yep soon and no sporle
chapter three a new hero
Time to gear up
I just woke up,and I realized I get to meet my new team today,so I rushed to put all my clothes,I ran down to the training room,when I got to the train room I saw,volt ahoy,kit lopez,Rantaro Kiyama,silas karlisel and free De La Hoya,i ran up to volt and i ask if he want to battle
Sails said who is this kid,i look back at his angrily and said im am the newest member of your team,sails said you are max slayer i said yes im am, he said funny a pipsqueak like you,I said oh yeah let's see who's a pipsqueak, i pull out My Bey and I said let's battle,Silas pull out his bey curse Satan,the first battle begins 3-2-1 let it rip,
Silas start his attack he calls out to his bey and said use Universe drift,
he knocked my bey out of the stadium,he says wow that was pretty easy,
I say it's not over yet next battle starts 3-2-1 let it rip,before Silas has a chance to react
I yell out to amaterios,use Lions barrage,amaterios keeps attacking,Silas looks at me and laughs,you think you can burst me with them pitiful attacks,he was right so I decided to use my final technique,amaterios use burning drift,our beys collided
Silas Bey burst,but amaterios was it very badly cracked,I won the battle,unfortunately I had to get my bey fixed,while everyone trained,looks like it's time to get an upgrade.
to be continued
hope you like it
yaaaaaaaaaa boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
RE: chapter one a new hero - reshiwum - Jan. 10, 2021
no offense, and i guess i'm quite late to this thing, but i think whoever this "sans the man" is, they are either a troll or someone whose main language isn't english (or just some kid not reading the rules and decides to just nyoom into wbo lmao). But fr though, i found them through a reply on GreenK9's Call Of The Beyblade fanfic thread, and seriously they kind of annoy me.
Also a critique for your fic: It's definitely not one of my favorites. I see a lot of grammar mistakes here and there and i dislike the way you write the story, the point of view of the story is unclear and you usually use punctuations in the wrong places. 2/10
RE: chapter one a new hero - GreenK9148 - Jan. 10, 2021
(Jan. 10, 2021 12:13 PM)tenma Wrote: no offense, and i guess i'm quite late to this thing, but i think whoever this "sans the man" is, they are either a troll or someone whose main language isn't english (or just some kid not reading the rules and decides to just nyoom into wbo lmao). But fr though, i found them through a reply on GreenK9's Call Of The Beyblade fanfic thread, and seriously they kind of annoy me.
Also a critique for your fic: It's definitely not one of my favorites. I see a lot of grammar mistakes here and there and i dislike the way you write the story, the point of view of the story is unclear and you usually use punctuations in the wrong places. 2/10
Yeah, I appreciate you saying this, but it is considered necro-posting. I think that we should just report this thread and let a mod close it.
RE: chapter one a new hero - reshiwum - Jan. 11, 2021
(Jan. 10, 2021 4:46 PM)GreenK9148 Wrote:(Jan. 10, 2021 12:13 PM)tenma Wrote: no offense, and i guess i'm quite late to this thing, but i think whoever this "sans the man" is, they are either a troll or someone whose main language isn't english (or just some kid not reading the rules and decides to just nyoom into wbo lmao). But fr though, i found them through a reply on GreenK9's Call Of The Beyblade fanfic thread, and seriously they kind of annoy me.
Also a critique for your fic: It's definitely not one of my favorites. I see a lot of grammar mistakes here and there and i dislike the way you write the story, the point of view of the story is unclear and you usually use punctuations in the wrong places. 2/10
Yeah, I appreciate you saying this, but it is considered necro-posting. I think that we should just report this thread and let a mod close it.
i may sound dumb here but what's necro-posting? (and yeah i think a mod may close it)