World Beyblade Organization by Fighting Spirits Inc.
A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Printable Version

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A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Ninja Crab - Aug. 23, 2011

Another version of The Tribe.
Chapter 1: The Begginning after the End [
Chapter 2: A New Home
Chapter 3 The Annoying Little Brat
These are based on real people and some are fake.... But most of them are real....


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Minho - Aug. 23, 2011

its ok... the length is okay but you have a few grammatical errors and try add more punctuation as its missing some full stops, commas and such.

Pretty average story but if you work on it i reckon it'll be good. Good Luck!


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Taj12 - Aug. 23, 2011

Wow, now paragraphs, when I first looked, it began to hurt my eyes. wasn't even able to read story. Might wan't to work on that


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Ninja Crab - Aug. 23, 2011

i know this is goin to sound stupid, but thats my editor's fault. He's my best friend and he's editing my storys, oh and i already done 15 pages of that story.


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Ninja Crab - Aug. 24, 2011

2nd chapter out now!! I hav put paragraphs in it now.


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - ControL_s SouL_ - Aug. 24, 2011

It's good but you need to describe more, I feel like there's more you should tell me about the scene, either way though, good story.


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Ninja Crab - Aug. 24, 2011

You'll here a bit more about the scenery in chapter 3, which will be out 2moz!!


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Ninja Crab - Aug. 25, 2011

* sigh * nobody reads my story anymore. Chapter 3 will be out this arvo....


RE: A New Beggining ( NOT A BEYSTORY ) - Ninja Crab - Aug. 26, 2011

yay Chap 3 out, I wish som of u would read it, its not a beystory, so wat, there is hardly any beyblade books but ya still read others