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+--- Thread: The Heist (/Thread-The-Heist)
The Heist - Hope - May. 30, 2011
I’ve decided it. Tonight at midnight I’m gonna break into the shop and steal the bey .My only problem with be the guard, but I can always distract him with some smoke grenades. The plans all sorted, Gurad will be in charge of disabling the security cameras and taking out all laser grids. Muraf will be the brawn of it all in case we need to get dirty and I will be the Head of Operations, using my stealth to sneak in through the cover of darkness.
RE: Fear Strikes the Heart - Dr. Peace - May. 30, 2011
nice introduction. Good description about the surrounding and good idea combining the element of calm and suspense
RE: Fear Strikes the Heart - Hope - May. 30, 2011
Thanks a lot.
I'm writing next chapter tomorow.
RE: Fear Strikes the Heart - RAW - May. 30, 2011
Hmm...pretty short and it seemed like you just wanted to rush in and make a story. Not much I can say now but so far I give it 7.5/10
RE: Fear Strikes the Heart - TheBlayder - May. 30, 2011
thats a chapter?!? No offence but its merely a few sentences.
RE: Fear Strikes the Heart - Hope - May. 30, 2011
Nope I just updated it, sorry it wasn't long my parents had to use the computer.
RE: Fear Strikes the Heart - storm pegusas5 - May. 30, 2011
its pretty good but i think you can do betterfrom reading your other stories this one is slightly off target as we might say
RE: The Heist - Hope - May. 30, 2011
Changed it again
RE: The Heist - Xlr8 - May. 31, 2011
nice beginning dude