(Mar. 05, 2021  7:52 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote: Review time boys

Grammar: 3.5/5, decent enough for the most part, a few mistakes every chapter but pretty good overall.
Story: 3/5, seems pretty rushed, not too much build up to moments, might have some big story but whatever stuff that does happen is always pretty rushed.
Characters: 2.5/5, characters like Valt and Lui seem out of character, very little development, and at times characters seem lifeless.
Dialogue: 2.5/5, dialogue seems lifeless a lot, hard to tell who’s saying what at times, and a lot of dialogue seems off for canon characters.
Length: 2.5/5, too short, everything is pretty rushed, not enough space to tell the story, and it just feels like a few lines. Could be shorter, could be longer.

Total: 14/25

(Mar. 05, 2021  7:58 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote:

(Mar. 05, 2021  7:52 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote: Review time boys

Grammar: 3.5/5, decent enough for the most part, a few mistakes every chapter but pretty good overall.
Story: 3/5, seems pretty rushed, not too much build up to moments, might have some big story but whatever stuff that does happen is always pretty rushed.
Characters: 2.5/5, characters like Valt and Lui seem out of character, very little development, and at times characters seem lifeless.
Dialogue: 2.5/5, dialogue seems lifeless a lot, hard to tell who’s saying what at times, and a lot of dialogue seems off for canon characters.
Length: 2.5/5, too short, everything is pretty rushed, not enough space to tell the story, and it just feels like a few lines. Could be shorter, could be longer.

Total: 14/25

oo, ee, ahh, that- that- that does not sound good. I will keep out for build-up moments, and I alos think that me gramer is gooder, and I only really mess up the names of Beys and stuff, but really I try to build up and that's what I really want to focus on. could you please go a little in-depth about the build-ups? Also I thought my dialogue and characters were pretty good; someone even insisted it was good without me even bringing it up.

(Mar. 05, 2021  7:59 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote:

(Mar. 05, 2021  7:58 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote: oo, ee, ahh, that- that- that does not sound good. I will keep out for build-up moments, and I alos think that me gramer is gooder, and I only really mess up the names of Beys and stuff, but really I try to build up and that's what I really want to focus on. could you please go a little in-depth about the build-ups? Also I thought my dialogue and characters were pretty good; someone even insisted it was good without me even bringing it up.

alos? sorry, but chettoblader's grading is fair and good.

(Mar. 05, 2021  7:58 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote:

(Mar. 05, 2021  7:52 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote: Review time boys

Grammar: 3.5/5, decent enough for the most part, a few mistakes every chapter but pretty good overall.
Story: 3/5, seems pretty rushed, not too much build up to moments, might have some big story but whatever stuff that does happen is always pretty rushed.
Characters: 2.5/5, characters like Valt and Lui seem out of character, very little development, and at times characters seem lifeless.
Dialogue: 2.5/5, dialogue seems lifeless a lot, hard to tell who’s saying what at times, and a lot of dialogue seems off for canon characters.
Length: 2.5/5, too short, everything is pretty rushed, not enough space to tell the story, and it just feels like a few lines. Could be shorter, could be longer.

Total: 14/25

oo, ee, ahh, that- that- that does not sound good. I will keep out for build-up moments, and I alos think that me gramer is gooder, and I only really mess up the names of Beys and stuff, but really I try to build up and that's what I really want to focus on. Could you please go a little in-depth about the build-ups? Also I thought my dialogue and characters were pretty good; someone even insisted it was good without me even bringing it up.

(Mar. 05, 2021  8:05 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote: With these improvements, I cannot guarantee 1 chapter per day. I will try my hardest to, and I'll put more time into this.

---

So I have a lot of stuff hitting me at one time, so I'll pause on my Fan Fic for a little bit. For how long? Not sure. Thanks for the support everyone who is following.

(Mar. 05, 2021  8:04 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote:

(Mar. 05, 2021  7:58 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote: oo, ee, ahh, that- that- that does not sound good. I will keep out for build-up moments, and I alos think that me gramer is gooder, and I only really mess up the names of Beys and stuff, but really I try to build up and that's what I really want to focus on. Could you please go a little in-depth about the build-ups? Also I thought my dialogue and characters were pretty good; someone even insisted it was good without me even bringing it up.

One random person saying something doesn’t exactly make it true, especially on this site. I can go in depth a bit more on some parts if I’m in the mood later.

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:12 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote: I'm sorry... it's just- I'm bored of this. I don't like the tight schedule I have of posting once a day. I do like how ya'll like the story, but I'm sorry. It is unlikely that I will post anything here again anytime soon. Someone can take over, I don't care...

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:14 PM)eggblader Wrote:

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:12 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote: I'm sorry... it's just- I'm bored of this. I don't like the tight schedule I have of posting once a day. I do like how ya'll like the story, but I'm sorry. It is unlikely that I will post anything here again anytime soon. Someone can take over, I don't care...

i could try.. but not evry day. i have school.

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:19 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote:

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:14 PM)eggblader Wrote: i could try.. but not evry day. i have school.

So do I... I am sure you could imagine the tight schedule.

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:20 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote:

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:19 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote: So do I... I am sure you could imagine the tight schedule.

you're officially quitting the fan fic?

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:22 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote:

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:20 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote: you're officially quitting the fan fic?

Officially? Not quite yet. Something i keeping me from giving this up. But I'm prob going to

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:44 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote: You know you could just not force yourself to upload daily, right?

Just upload when you want, if you think a schedule helps you write, make it something like once a week, twice a week, etc.

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:45 PM)Spin Stealing Wrote:

(Mar. 09, 2021  6:44 PM)CheetoBlader Wrote: You know you could just not force yourself to upload daily, right?

Just upload when you want, if you think a schedule helps you write, make it something like once a week, twice a week, etc.

Well, yeah, thanks. I think that's one of the reasons this Fan Fic wasn't that good.

(Mar. 09, 2021  9:07 PM)Ryuga's Son Wrote: There's always mistakes, what we can do is make as many less mistakes as we can and try our best