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+--- Thread: A Brave New World (Beyblade Story)-Re-Editing And Finishing At Long Last (/Thread-A-Brave-New-World-Beyblade-Story-Re-Editing-And-Finishing-At-Long-Last)
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparx000 - Jan. 07, 2011
i agree! i am hooked on this!
we want fan fic!
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Kay En - Jan. 08, 2011
nice story. hope it turns into a book for kids
plzz hurry i rlly wanna read the whole story
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparta - Jan. 09, 2011
Guys I am truly sorry I haven't posted in a while. Beleive it or not, I am a very busy person. I won't promise anything but I may post tomorrow
Again, I truly apologize
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - C-Dub - Jan. 10, 2011
ok just take ur time because i need the story
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparta - Jan. 10, 2011
K. well I'm not done but 2 hold you off here is chapter 8 (is tht rite?) part 1!!
WWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
sorry for not posting for a week!!
It was almost over. Round after round I kept on winning, left and right i heard of bladers losing their 2nd loss to me. It was pretty cool, being able to control and wield Dranzers intense power. There were only two people I had yet to beat, and one of them was Jin. And the other........I didn't know. But it was my turn to blade, and I was up against Jin. Now it's time for my revenge I thought, gripping Dranzer tightly. I stood up and walked out. "And here comes Ethan!" DJ announced. "And his bey Comet Dranzer M145 WD!" I smiled and gave and gave a wave to the fanatic crowd, but I was focused on the battle with Jin, who had just entered the arena. "And here comes Jin!" DJ exclaimed. "And his bey Gash Orion 100 R2F!" Jin ignored his cheers from the crowd and took his launch position. I took mine, ready for my revenge. I knew I was ready. DJ began the countdown. "3!" "2!" "1" I grimaced, and together Jin and I shouted the famous words: "Let It RIIPPP!!!" We launched, and almost immediately Gash Orion was on the attack. "This had better be better than our last encounter" Jin antagonized. "Because the last one was so boring." My head was down and there was a black shadow over my eyes. "Don't tempt me" I warned. "You'll regret it". He laughed, then stared intently. "Just try." Then Orion's attacks became even more violent. "Wow!" DJ exclaimed. "Where is he getting all of his power from?" He smiled. "Well, I've got a tee time I have to make, so let's end this now. Special Move! Octane Gash!" Orion began to glow white, then he hit me up into the air. "And it looks like Jim has this one all wraped up!" DJ announced. Suddenly one of my eyes became visible, and it was a dark red. "I lost to you last time," I explained. "Because I could not control Dranzer. But I will not make the same mistake- EVER!! AGAIN!!" Dranzer's emblem flashed, and her special attack began. I raised my hands up towards the sky. "Full on attack! Blazing Comet Rainstorm!!!" I poured all of my energy into the attack, and Dranzer came down in a comet that shook the entire building. As soon as it made contact with the stadium, it broke apart. Jin was in shock. "How?" He asked. Then the stadium exploded. The blast shook the building right down the foundations. When the smoke finally cleared, we all searched for beys. Orion, blackened and charred, was stopped. Jin gasped. And Dranzer.....was still spinning! There was nothing left of even the floor of the stadium, and soon men with fire extinguishers arrived on the scene. They put out the fire in the stadium, but not the one in my heart. I nelt down beside Dranzer. "We did it." I said. My eyes shone brightly. "We did it."
This is only part 1!!! And I am so sorry to do this, but I cannot use ANY of the bad charactors. I can't tell why, because it would give away some of the plot line, but I cant. Please understand. I am terribly soory for any inconvenience I have caused you. Please except my apology
Chapter 8 part 2 may be up tomorrow
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - C-Dub - Jan. 10, 2011
can't wait for part 2!!1
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Light Yagami - Jan. 10, 2011
nethier can i
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparta - Jan. 10, 2011
You can't??? Then don't!!!!
Chap 8 part 2 (when the next chapter comes out I'll begin to name chapters).....LOTS of charactor development here...
I had won the tournament. I had won!!
Or so I thought.
I had forgotten about the last mystery blader, who had reportedly beaten Cristian. At hearing this, I stood up in the locker rooms. "No way!" I exclaimed. "That's not possible! Cristian-beaten? By a cloaked blader without a name?" I calmed down and thought for a while. Then, "Unless it's him." I paused, the flashbacks still ringing in my mind. Cloaked blader. Launched from his hill. Destroyed my town in fire. I still could remember his face. He looked at me...I would never forget those piercing light blue eyes, like an angels. Smiling at my families death. I was in the house, and smoke was everywhere. The launcher, my dad gave me his launcher. "Go." he had said, choking on the smoke. My brother was gone. My mother was already dead, she died years before. I remembered the horrible smoke....I couldn't breathe....the screams of pain.....too much! Too much! I snapped out of it, sweat perspiring down my face. I was to face him next round, for the championships. If this blader was him I thought. Then...then....I gripped Dranzer, tears were in my eyes, remembering them. I lifted my head up and cried out my pain.
"Hello beyblade fans, and welcome to the final round of the Burger King tournament! These two bladers have fought many battles to get here, and are ready to let it rip!" DJ rambled on, but I wasn't listening. I was mad, so mad, so very mad....I took my place at the dish and did not acknowledge the audience. DJ introduced me for the 100th time, then pointed to the other side. And here comes his more than worthy opponent, who did not give us any data at all on him or his blade, the cloaked blader!" I saw him, the black cloak he wore, his smile. And the eyes. They were those blue..... I flashed back to seeing him in the town, and I knew this was him. I fell to my knees, weak from all of the flashbacks. "I know you," I started. "You killed my family! You monster!" The audience was silenced by my accusation, but he smiled. "Yes, so it is only fair I give you my name". He paused, and I trembled. "Brooklyn" he said simply, and upon hearing the name I knew well, I sat in silence.
Spoiler: Brooklyn and I have a history......this will be explained in the next chapter.
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Light Yagami - Jan. 10, 2011
awesome i love your storys cant wait for next chapter
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparta - Jan. 10, 2011
(Jan. 10, 2011 2:40 AM)darkangel629 Wrote: awesome i love your storys cant wait for next chapterThank you! Huge XD
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Light Yagami - Jan. 10, 2011
your welcome
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - C-Dub - Jan. 10, 2011
Awesome X million dude!!!Nice Suspense 2
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparta - Jan. 10, 2011
hehehehehehehehe gotta luv cliffhangers...
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - C-Dub - Jan. 10, 2011
oooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkk can't wait tll nxt chapter!! Oh yeah i put ur character in the story(BTW he's a main character like mine in yours)
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparta - Jan. 10, 2011
Awesome!! Gotta go check btw sry he lost bt he had 2 (dnt worry he'll be more main than you know-that goes 4 u 2 crabby guy person w/ Jin)
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - LordCepheusIII - Jan. 10, 2011
Awesome Chapter!
RE: The Blader- A Story!! - Sparta - Jan. 10, 2011
Hey guys
next chapter should be up by the end of this week
however, we are supposed to get EVEN MORE snow on wednesday, so in the event that school is closed and I wasn't lazy and did my homework tuesday night, I may make it then
So stay tuned!
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - Kay En - Jan. 14, 2011
hope da story haz a awsome ending!!!
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - LordCepheusIII - Jan. 15, 2011
Am I on your ignore list sparta?
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - Sparta - Jan. 16, 2011
No! Why??
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - C-Dub - Jan. 16, 2011
Plz make anozer chaptah or else i'll turn into madusa!!!!!!
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - Light Yagami - Jan. 16, 2011
ppppppppppllllllllllllllllzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz make another chapter plz
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - Sparta - Jan. 16, 2011
OKokokokok!!
Itl b up 2morrow, that's a garuntee
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - MaximumX - Jan. 16, 2011
You finally got me to read this. Much better than I thought it would be. My only regret is that I didnt start reading it sooner. Now I can't have a character.
RE: The Blader- Part 1 of a Story!! [No more characters] - Sparta - Jan. 16, 2011
Sorry.....
glad u like it!!
(I've kknown you 4 2 long not to get you in
dont worry)