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+--- Thread: Katsuya's Story~ Series 1~ G-Force (/Thread-Katsuya-s-Story-Series-1-G-Force)
RE: Katsuya's Story~ Series 1~ G-Force - SwiftShadow - Jul. 16, 2011
You changed between present and past tense a lot in this chapter. Stay in one tense unless you have a reason to switch and are able to do it effectively. You also have some spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, and a lot of unneeded capital letters in it, so you might want to proofread it.
RE: Katsuya's Story~ Series 1~ G-Force - TenshouTsubasa - Jul. 16, 2011
I noticed that there are some '()' , which is bad for stories.
Ya know , if ya were thinking, you do not need these marks, except this is a P.S.