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+--- Thread: The Great Beyblade Story (/Thread-The-Great-Beyblade-Story)
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Light Yagami - Feb. 10, 2011
awesome i like it
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - howdodelete - Feb. 10, 2011
Can I be an evil guy?Here's mine
Name:Reiki Hiwazara
Age:11
Clothes:A gray t-shirt with the Aries symbol on it,A gray and white hoodie,black jeans with a chain,a belt that holds his launcher grip and bey,black hair,a WBBA cap,and white and black slip on shoes.
Bey
arth Aries CH145WDSpecial Move:Iron Ram Attack,the bey turns into solid steel and hits the opponent out of the stadium.
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 10, 2011
(Feb. 10, 2011 5:28 AM)EarthAries Wrote: Can I be an evil guy?Here's mine
Name:Reiki Hiwazara
Age:11
Clothes:A gray t-shirt with the Aries symbol on it,A gray and white hoodie,black jeans with a chain,a belt that holds his launcher grip and bey,black hair,a WBBA cap,and white and black slip on shoes.
Bey
Special Move:Iron Ram Attack,the bey turns into solid steel and hits the opponent out of the stadium.
Finnally, A person who is willing to be evil! You are so in!
(Feb. 10, 2011 5:22 AM)darkangelkaieru Wrote: awesome i like it
Thank you Dark Angel, That was very nice of you. BTW: did you read the third chapter? Because I added your character like I promised.
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - howdodelete - Feb. 11, 2011
Um..Your welcome Peacock? lol
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 11, 2011
Here is chapter four!
Chapter 4: Into the Wolf's Lair!
"So we have to travel south to the Black Wolf's lair, right?" asked Kevin. "I believe so." replied Mark. "How far south?" Kevin inquired. "Let's ask Kyum." Mark said. "Hey Kyum, how far south do we have to travel to get to the Black Wolf's Base?" "Just ride on my blizzard, okay." Kyum replied. "What are you talking about? You can't ride a BBLLLLIIIIZZZAAARRDD!!! AGGGGGHHH!!!" Kevin screamed while being whisked away by the blizzard. Then Mark was swept away in the blizzard.
"Thanks for the ride, Kyum." Mark said. "No Problem, Mark." Kyum replied as she returned to Mark's beyblade. "Hey, Mark I think we are not alone." Kevin said. "What do you mean?" Mark asked. "Well, you know how that Kyum said that we would meet up with three other bladers, right? Well I think that things in the distance are the three beybladers that we are supposed to meet up with." Kevin told Mark. "Let's go take a look!" Mark said with excitement.
"No,no, no! Peacocks should be all different colours, not just green!" Jake snapped. "But green is the best colour in the world! The grass is green! Trees are green! Why not peacocks!" Breil yelled in reply. " Guys, guys calm down. We do have bigger matters on our hands, like sneaking in to the Black Wolves base." Whirlpool said to both of them. " Uh,oh. Trouble at three o`clock." Jake said. "What are you talking about, Jake?" Breil inquired. "I think he is talking about the two people in the distance. They might be Black Wolf members." Whirlpool answered. "What should we do?" Jake asked. "Let's play it cool. This could be our chance to get some information on the Black Wolfs." Breil said in replied. "Hey, you two!" Jake yelled. "Who is that guy?" Kevin asked. " It's them, the bladers we need to meet." Replied Mark "Let's go!".
"Hey you!" Jake called out. "What do you want." Asked Mark. "We just want to know what you are doing here. That is all." Breil said. "It is pretty dangerous down here." Whirlpool added on. "Well why are you here then?" Kevin asked back. "That's it! I am tired of waiting! Your Black Wolves, and we know it! So don't play stupid, and get us in to the lair!" Breil yelled at Kevin and Mark. "We are not Black Wolves!" Kevin snapped back. "Prove it then!" Whirlpool exclaimed. "Okay then I will! Mark, show them your beyblade." Kevin asked Mark. "Well, okay. Here is my beyblade, Blizzard Kyum!" Mark said with pride. "Well, that proves it." Jake replied. "Well, what are we waiting for, let's go!" Kevin said.
It was a dark hallway that the five boys traveled through. It had little to no light, like darkness had swallowed the place. The hall lead on to a room filled with people that Mark thought to be elite members of the Black Wolves. "Let's bust in on the count of three." Mark told the group of bladers. "One, two, three!" The boys yelled as busted into the room. "The door was unlocked, you know." said one of the elites. "We know, we just though it would be coooler to bust the door open." Mark replied. "Yes, yes no matter. Now, do you need to file a complaint?" Said a mysterious man. "Who are you?" Kevin asked. "I am Xad. The true leader of the Black Wolves. And I know why you are here. To take me down and stop my plan from going through. But if you want that to happen you will have to deal with this." Xad said. And out of the shadows came a figure in black robes. "You again!" exclaimed Jake. "We meet again, my old friend." replied Lupus. "Though it is not you I want to battle it is Mark who I want to battle. Go Wolf!" yelled Lupus while launching Midnight wolf. "C'mon, Kyum!" Mark yelled back while launching Kyum. The two tops started hammering at each other. Kyum broke away from the collision and to run. But Wolf was right on her tail. "You think that you can run from the Wolf and outlast it? Hah! Wolf, into the sky!" Lupus ordered. And as told, wolf launched itself into the air and started striking from above. But Kyum dodged by a hair and counterattacked. Though Wolf matched Kyum attack and sent her flying. Oddly enough, Kyum was still retaining her insanely high spin. "That is it!" exclaimed Breil. "What do you mean?" asked Kevin. "It is Kyum's track, I145. It is made out of ice, which gives it very high spin." replied Breil. "Alright, Let's end this. Kyum, Special Move, Howling Blizzard!" ordered Mark. Kyum arose from Mark's Beyblade and sommound a Blizzard that sent Lupus' beyblade flying while freezing his beyblade over. He had won. Mark had won.
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Korinzu - Feb. 11, 2011
Thats really good! And now an evil character.
Arth
Cyber Excalibur C145 Q
Special move Cyber Sword Slash
Age 18
Excalibur looks similar to Virgos energy ring except three edged.
Arth is very rich and wheres a black, purple and gold suit.He has red eyes.
Cyber sword slash is where a sword spirit comes out and the claws hit the opponent and flings the other bey up in the air because of Q.
Hope you like!
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 11, 2011
(Feb. 11, 2011 10:58 AM)Korinzu Wrote: Thats really good! And now an evil character.
Arth
Cyber Excalibur C145 Q
Special move Cyber Sword Slash
Age 18
Excalibur looks similar to Virgos energy ring except three edged.
Arth is very rich and wheres a black, purple and gold suit.He has red eyes.
Cyber sword slash is where a sword spirit comes out and the claws hit the opponent and flings the other bey up in the air because of Q.
Hope you like!
Thank You You are in.
Chapter 5: The Stealth Shadow
"Yes! I won!" Mark exclaimed. He had just beat one of the Black Wolves toughest bladers, Lupus. "Alright, now. Because you beat Lupus, I shall give you what you want." Xad said. "What are your motives?" Mark need to know. "As you wish." Xad replied "But to understand it we must go back a little further. It was seven years ago, I was your happy little 9 year old boy. I loved beyblades. But I did not have one. All the kids at school made fun of me. My only safe place was the library. It was the only thing that could match my love for beyblade. And it was also where I got my first beyblade. When I was looking through the library, I noticed on book that chaught my eye. And it was about beyblades. Forbidden beyblades to be exact. It talked about how these beys could sink boats or level towns. And that is just what I did. I used the book to the the location of the strongest bey, Stealth Shadow. And then I decided to test out it's power. First, I bought a ticket to the world famous, S.S. Trident." "Hey, Whirlpool, that was the boat that you and your family went on." Breil pointed out. "Which means that, you killed all those innocent people along with my parents!" Whirlpool yelled at Xad. "I shall never forgive you!" Whrilpool screamed while launching Posidon. "Let It Rip!" Xad said while launching Shadow. "Dark Move! Splice!" Xad ordered. A Shadowy figure soon rose from Xad beyblade and slashed Posidon and Whirlpool. "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" Whirlpool screamed. After the chaos was over, Xad's beyblade was still spinnning, and all Whirlpool had was a zombified look on his face.
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Sparx000 - Feb. 11, 2011
Wow...thanks so much for putting me in your awesome story!
When's the next chapter?
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Korinzu - Feb. 12, 2011
Cool!!!
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 14, 2011
Hey guys, I just got to tell you that the next chapter should be up in 2-4 days. The reason is that me and my family are moving into a new house and it is taking a while to unpack everything. I am so happy all of you guys liked my story and suggested so many characters. You guys have been paitent when it took time for the next chapter. You are the best.
Thank you everyone
~Liam
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Light Yagami - Feb. 14, 2011
its awesome
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - RayLightning - Feb. 14, 2011
name: Ray Kamota
Apperance: black hair, black pants, and a purple shirt.
Personality: Pretty shyto most all people unless you get to know him . , very protective of his bey, and best friends with it
BEy: Gravity Achilles
Face: black with a purple warriot holding a sword and shield
Ring: has 3 black skulls on each side of the ring, with 3 red eyes, a rough blackish purple texture
Wheel: Blackish grey, with the shape of a archer arching his bow, and vry thick.
Track: shadow armor145 circular shield shaped track that can disappear to make the bey dissapear, for defene purposes
Tip:Gravity Ballvery heavy tip that mainly stays t the ground, but can lift up very easily f you master it.
sorry if its too long
, but i hope u like it!!!
p.s. I wuld REALLY appreciate it if i could be a good guyhis bey has a awesome power, but doesnt like to use it
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 14, 2011
Well, I am not sure if he could be a main character. He is a good character, though. I will give you a P-M for my final verdit. Thank you for your sugestion, though
P.S.
You do know that there is a wheel named Gravity, right?
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - RayLightning - Feb. 14, 2011
yea iknow, but i couldnt really think of anything
how come i cant be a amaain character??? can you SUPER PLEASE try and work something out?? sorry iff i sound ungrateful,its just i ALWAYS am a character who isnt that important and only shows up ever so often
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 15, 2011
(Feb. 14, 2011 11:40 PM)RayLightning Wrote: yea iknow, but i couldnt really think of anything
how come i cant be a amaain character??? can you SUPER PLEASE try and work something out?? sorry iff i sound ungrateful,its just i ALWAYS am a character who isnt that important and only shows up ever so often
Alright, I have worked somthing out. Your character will be a main character. He will apper in Chapter 7: The Knowalgable Achilles. Under normal circumstances, I would not have let your character have a role in the first place. YOU ARE THE ONLY EXCEPTION AND I WILL NOT DO THIS AGAIN FOR ANY ONE.
Thank you for the suggestion,
~Liam
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - RayLightning - Feb. 15, 2011
THAK YOU INFINITY tIMES!!!!!Whens the next chapte?? keep up the good work
Sincerely,
RayLightning
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 15, 2011
You are welcome. The next chapter will be up later today or tomorrow.
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - RayLightning - Feb. 16, 2011
AWESOME STORY SO FAR!!!!!! KEEPUP THE GOOD WORK!!!!!!!!!!
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 16, 2011
Here it is! The next preveiw.
Chapter 5: The Shadow Within
"Whirlpool!" The four other Bladers exclaimed. Whirlpool had just had a traumatic experience in a battle with Xad. The aftermath of the battle was to much for Whirlpool and he was knocked out. "Heh, heh, heh. Well that was fun." Xad said. "This is far from over, Xad!" Mark snapped. "Then let us decide it right now then. Battle me! And we shall see! He he he!" Challenged Xad.
Outside the HQ was a big, metal beystaidum that was near the ocean edge. The waves were strong, and so were the spirits of the two bladers about to battle. "I have heard of Kyum's artic power, so show it to me now!" Xad exclaimed. "I will not let you get away with what you have done, and all the the awful thing you will do in the future!" Mark replied with fury. This was his big chance. He could gain information about how Xad fights. He could not let this slip. "Alright, Three!" Mark yelled. "Two!" Xad replied with exitement. "One, LET IT RIP!" The two Bladers screamed.
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Sparx000 - Feb. 16, 2011
This story is EPIC!I love it!
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 17, 2011
Here is the next chapter!
Chapter 6: The Shadow's Power
"Whirlpool!" The four other Bladers exclaimed. Whirlpool had just had a traumatic experience in a battle with Xad. The aftermath of the battle was to much for Whirlpool and he was knocked out. "Heh, heh, heh. Well that was fun." Xad said. "This is far from over, Xad!" Mark snapped. "Then let us decide it right now then. Battle me! And we shall see! He he he!" Challenged Xad.
Outside the HQ was a big, metal beystaidum that was near the ocean edge. The waves were strong, and so were the spirits of the two bladers about to battle. "I have heard of Kyum's artic power, so show it to me now!" Xad exclaimed. "I will not let you get away with what you have done, and all the the awful thing you will do in the future!" Mark replied with fury. This was his big chance. He could gain information about how Xad fights. He could not let this slip. "Alright, Three!" Mark yelled. "Two!" Xad replied with exitement. "One, LET IT RIP!" The two Bladers screamed.
"Kyum, let's go!" Mark ordered. Kyum started to hit Shadow from above. For a stamina type, Kyum had a lot of attack power. "Shadow, mimic Kyum, right now!" Xad commanded. Shadow started to mimic Kyum's attack, and soon Kyum was one who was taking the attacks. "What is this? This is impossible." Mark said with shock. "Send Kyum flying, Shadow!" Xad ordered with vileness. Kyum was sent flying impossibly high, but thanks to I145, Kyum was able to keep hanging in the air. "Good job, Kyum!" Mark exclaimed. "I wonder, since those waves are crashing at the staduim at quite high levels, maybe i can freeze the staduim floor by drawing the waves into the staduim!" Mark thought to himself. "Okay, Kyum, Special Move! Howling Blizzard!" Mark commanded. Kyum a rose once again from Mark's Beyblade and summonded a ferocious blizzard and started freezing Stealth Shadow. It was also catching the tide. "Bring it in, Kyum!" Mark asked Kyum. A giant wave crashed into the staduim while the blizzard was still going. Suddenly the staduim was frozen in ice. "Kyum, Icy Veil!" Mark commanded. Kyum then again sent a blizzard into the staduim. Unlike the last blizzard, this blizzard was not a damaging blizzard, but a mild blizzard that made Kyum invisible. "I must admit, yhat was a pretty smart move. Freezing the floor so that I could not mimic your movments and make Shadow harder to control. Nice. Then you create a blizzard that hides Kyum. Those were pretty smart moves. Though that is sadly not enough. Dark Move! Splice!" Xad commanded. A shadowy figure soon arose from Xad's Beyblade. "You know, this reminds me of the time I battle against that Achilles blader. He had a lot of good tricks. But they were just tricks. Nothing special. It was a lot like this battle I am having with you, Mark. Now finish this, Shadow" Xad ordered. The giant figure pulled out a dark blade and slashed down toward Kyum and Mark. " I am not letting it end this way! Kyum, Bond with me as I draw out our newfound power! Special Move! Ice World Eruption!" Mark yelled. Suddenly, a giant glacier sprouted from the center of the staduim Which released a malestorm of wind and ice. Shadow's dark blade hit the glacier at the moment of eruption, causing an explosion of ice and shadow which no one could see through. "Kyum!" Mark yelled. "Shadow!" Xad screamed. After the smoke cleared, the final verdit was in. It was a tie.
Here is a preveiw at the next chapter.
Chapter 7: The Knowaglable Achilles
"Well, well. You are better that I expected." Xad said. "We may have tied, but it does not mean this over" Mark replied. "I know. One thing is for certain, that we will meet again. But for now, bye bye. Hahahahahahaha!" Xad said while running away. "What just happened?" Asked a familiar voice. "Whirlpool! Your back!" Mark said. "Where is everyone else?" Whirlpool asked. "I told them to leave me alone for this battle so they would not get hurt." Mark answered. "Maybe we should find a place to rest." Whirpool said. "Could I be of any help?" Kyum asked while appering out of nowhere. "Do you have anywhere for us to stay for a while?" Mark asked. "Well, I do have a palace you can stay at. Ride my blizzard and you will be there in no time." Kyum replied. "Thanks, Kyum." Mark said. "Are you ready, every one? Because here we go!" Kyum exclaimed while carring herself and the two boys with her.
I know this chapter is long, but I could not fit it into one little chapter.
Thank you for reading!
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - RayLightning - Feb. 17, 2011
whens chapter 7 gonna be up?? this story is My FAVORITE!!! nice job and keep up the good work!
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Kujikato - Feb. 17, 2011
can i join, you have a lot of talent as a writer,
name: Izuma Inzori
Bey: Silent Ninja SBSCH85-110 RHF/RS
Bey discrption:
Silent: think of Lightning with the multi hit mode as thick shurikens, and upper mode as a kunai
Ninja: think of Kerbecs with the 'rings' as shurikens
SBSCH85-110: Shuriken Blade Spring Change Height8.5mm-11mm, think of CH120 with a external shell resembeling a shuriken, can be fixed in posistion or lose
RHF/RS: HF/F with the tips made of rubber
characther bio: wears Black all the time, helpful and cool, classmates are jealous of him
super attack: Silent death Silent Ninja dissapears and hits oponent with a million kunai and shuriken
bey color: all black
age 12
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 17, 2011
(Feb. 17, 2011 12:28 PM)Dracovianauis Wrote: can i join, you have a lot of talent as a writer,
name: Izuma Inzori
Bey: Silent Ninja SBSCH85-110 RHF/RS
Bey discrption:
Silent: think of Lightning with the multi hit mode as thick shurikens, and upper mode as a kunai
Ninja: think of Kerbecs with the 'rings' as shurikens
SBSCH85-110: Shuriken Blade Spring Change Height8.5mm-11mm, think of CH120 with a external shell resembeling a shuriken, can be fixed in posistion or lose
RHF/RS: HF/F with the tips made of rubber
characther bio: wears Black all the time, helpful and cool, classmates are jealous of him
super attack: Silent death Silent Ninja dissapears and hits oponent with a million kunai and shuriken
bey color: all black
age 12
I am very sorry but it would be hard for me to squeese in another character though I will do what I can. It would be easeir for you to be reacurring. Thank you for the compailment though.
Thank you for reading,
~Liam
P.S. Did you read the opening post? Because it clearly said I WAS NOT taking any more characters.
[quote='RayLightning' pid='550462' dateline='1297915896']
whens chapter 7 gonna be up?? this story is My FAVORITE!!! nice job and keep up the good work!
I do live in Canada, Alberta, So it should be up today or tomorrow Canada time.
P.S.
Where do you live ray lightning?
RE: The Great Beyblade Story - Super Peacock - Feb. 18, 2011
Hey Korinzu and Earth Aries. Your characters will be in Chapter 10.
Thank for waiting,
~Liam