Prolog
My name is Zalo. I am an 10 year old girl with brown hair with a few blonde highlights. I'm with my 13 year old friend Zai. He has plain black hair. We are doing the usual routine of the day, just hangin underneath a tree. It was almost 12:00 and a storm was coming in. We walked home and the rain started to pour. We heard lightning in the distant but didn't think anything of it. I arrived at my home and waved goodbye to Zai. I was alrready home when the storm passed so I went out to get my freind. He was staring at something. I walked next to him and saw what it was. Some sort of top...
This took me 2 hours!
that took you two hours? most writers here could do that in 10 minutes, myself included.
(Jul. 28, 2011 10:15 PM)Terra Blazer Wrote: [ -> ]that took you two hours? most writers here could do that in 10 minutes, myself included.
reason whyis because i was watching TV XD
it actually took me 20 because i had short writers block...
Be careful when you say that you're accepting character requests, Temporal might come along and criticize you for accepting potential mary-sues. No offense Temporal, if you're seeing this post!
Hrm...
(Jul. 28, 2011 9:56 PM)th!nk Wrote: [ -> ]The pacing is good, unlike many stories here which rush into action, and I appreciate not having the standard "THIS IS WHO I AM AND WHAT I LOOK LIKE" start-of-story character description.
Read the bolded. And yes, I WILL criticize bad OCs. Using them disrespects fiction in general.
Wait...the story is named after the character? Mary-Sue alert!
(Jul. 28, 2011 10:30 PM)Temporal Wrote: [ -> ]Hrm...
(Jul. 28, 2011 9:56 PM)th!nk Wrote: [ -> ]The pacing is good, unlike many stories here which rush into action, and I appreciate not having the standard "THIS IS WHO I AM AND WHAT I LOOK LIKE" start-of-story character description.
Read the bolded. And yes, I WILL criticize bad OCs. Using them disrespects fiction in general.
Wait...the story is named after the character? Mary-Sue alert!
Its a teporary name because I don't wanna call my story "Story"... i had writers block i had a good background written down in notepad and forgot what i saved it too. I went through 20-30 school reports and 20-40 random stories i write when im bored...
that took me about an hour also because my computer was bein stupid so i had to restart 5 times and now im on my ipod