This is a story idea I came up with a few days ago (In the middle of spanish class, and for shouting out loud "I JUST GOT A STORY IDEA!!!" out loud I got a detention. Maybe that's why girls think I'm insane...), but unlike almost any other story you've ever read, it's written backwards (As in it starts at the last chapter). Hope this works out!
Because this could get confusing, I'm adding a small spoiler summary:
In this world, there are 3 fine arts: the art of drawing, the art of acting, and the art of writing. Each one is unique for possessing different power, and a select few can control it and bring it to life. Brad Tamer (XD), Annabell Strong, and Jason Aquanita have been chosen by their processors to be the last heirs to these powers. IN their own ways, they are sent to an academy to learn to harness and control their powers. Just as they begin their training, a foe as old as Earth itself comes back for vengeance, to destroy the planet. His name is the shadow.. They now have a mission: Destroy the Shadow or he will destroy the earth. Can they save it in time?
Chapter 21: The End
I gasped for breath, the blood pouring down my shirt like a river. My vision began to blur, but I could make out the figures of Jason and Anna. Jason had just conjured up a wooly mammoth, rearing it's head back and galloping at the shadow. Jason himself seemed distressed and tired, his baggy eyes faded and confused. Anna...was at my side, shaking me and willing me to live. I touched my chest to where the blood was pouring and looked up. My blood wouldn't stop, like an army of red marching forward. Every second it advanced I grew weaker. Gasping for air, I shakily reached up for Anna. A tear came to her eye, and she blinked it away, grabbing my cold hand. "Please don't go" I heard her beg. "Please." My eyes began to close, and I thought of a paragraph: Suddenly, the shadows head began to drop, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. He slowly reached the ground where, after so many years of destruction and chaos, his eyes shut for the final time.
I was fully aware that using a killing paragraph would also end me, but it didn't matter anyways. My body had already gone cold and lifeless, my eyes shuttering for their final sight. I looked up at Anna, a picture I would never forget. I knew this was the end for both the shadow and me. In the distance, I heard the shadow fall, and Jason screaming at me, running over to help. There was nothing he could do. My heart began to beat slower. A hero, I thought, my eyes closing. I would die a hero. A brave, honorable hero. Smiling, I drew my last breath.
I had mastered the Fine Arts.
Please review!
awesome story man cant wait to see what has already happened(since your story is backwards everything already happened)
(May. 25, 2011 12:25 AM)Light Yagami Wrote: [ -> ]awesome story man cant wait to see what has already happened(since your story is backwards everything already happened)
Haha very true. Thanks.
This is a pretty cool idea actually, it's like spoiling a story but starting it at the same time. Please, continue! It's a great story.
The concept of writing the story backwards is very interesting. You are a very good writer, and the first, or last, chapter is really good. I love the idea of the story and I can't wait to read more!
(May. 26, 2011 10:05 PM)GaHooleone Wrote: [ -> ]This is a pretty cool idea actually, it's like spoiling a story but starting it at the same time. Please, continue! It's a great story.
(May. 27, 2011 2:16 AM)SwiftShadow Wrote: [ -> ]The concept of writing the story backwards is very interesting. You are a very good writer, and the first, or last, chapter is really good. I love the idea of the story and I can't wait to read more!
Thank you both for the feedback. I think I'll have the next chapter up after the weekend (For this weekend I'll be going away so I wont have wifi...)
Never mind, I tethered to my Dad's iPhone. Here's chapter 20!
Jason, Anna, and I watched in horror as the Shadow began to tear up the AFFA building, my last home. Anna was holding back tears, and Jason just watched, wide-eyed and pale. My hand was clenched in a fist, and I was shaking with anger. That thing was destroying the last thing in my life that I had come to love! I looked down. There was almost nothing left for me now. Nothing but my friends and my courage, which I'll admit, was wavering like jelly. I began to flash back and remember everything that had happened since the awakening day. I had met new friends, found a real home, and almost had a real family. But now this beast had taken almost all of that and threw it down the drain, gone forever!
The smell of sulfur hit my nostrils, pulling me out of my thoughts and back into reality. I looked up, only to find myself looking into the Shadows red eyes, not 10 yards away from my face. I quickly backed away, resisting the urge to scream, and made a quick look around. Jason and Anna were gone! Had the shadow killed them? Had they try to run in and save Professor Blank, Flow and the others? I began to run towards the ashen remains of the building, but stopped myself. They wouldn't have left me behind if they were going to do that, especially not Anna. As the Shadows fist smashed down on where I had just been standing, I decided I would worry about them later. Right now I had to destroy the Shadow before it awakened the other nightmares. Adrenaline pumping through me, I thought of a sentence that could help me:
"Suddenly, without warning, Brads two friends Jason and Anna appeared next him, exhausted but alive. They then turned with him to face the enemy, the Shadow."
Just as I finished the thought, Jason and Anna materialized beside me, both looking around, frightened and pale. I began to consider that they had indeed been in the building looking for the others, but I pushed away the thought as Anna planted a kiss on my cheek and hugged me tight. "Thank god your alive!" She cried, pulling me closer. "Ugh fufu gah" Was all I could manage as my cheeks turned red. Jason shifted uncomfortably on his feet. "Um, yah," He said nonchalantly. "Maybe you two lovebirds haven't noticed, but we're in the middle of a war here!" She let go, and I stood up, dazed. Note to self: Summoning sentences are the equivalent of a hangover. Do NOT try them often. We looked over at the Shadow, who seemed to have even forgotten we were here. It looked like it was bowing to the ground, waving its' hands around like spires. It seemed like it was trying to conjur something from the ground...
Oh, God NO! I watched in horror all over again as a hole opened in the earth, stretching like a wormhole. It was glowing red, and lava was frothing at the expanding sides. The heat began to singe my eyebrows, and the air grew hazy. I looked around, but I couldn't see Jason, or Anna! And what about the Prof.? Was he still alive? As if to answer my question, the fog lifted and a figure appeared next to the sink hole. I saw a scarf waving around, and I smiled. He made it! "Beast!" Professor Blank cried, drawing the Shadows attention. It looked ready to pound him to bits, yet was waiting for something. Suddenly, the sink hole began to close, and Jason and Anna became clear once more. "Fowl creature, you arose from hell, waging war against mankind." Prof. Blank seemed to grow tired, but he did not stop. Whatever he was doing, it was really starting to piss off the Shadow. "You burned down many a great city, and you gained power again by visiting many a persons nightmare!" The sink hole thundered shut, and the Shadow screamed aloud, at the very least fracturing my eardrums. "Now, you will return to the depths, of whence you-" He never got the chance to finish because at that very moment, the very pissed off Shadow blasted incinerating power cells at the Professor...and me.
Well? Review and rate!
Oh, and guess what? I like this story so much, I will be holding a contest! You have to guess what AFFA stands for! If you do, PM me what you think, and if you're right you get an iPad!
No, sorry, JK, I don't have enough money for that. But you WILL get a character in this story! So PM me (Only one guess per customer) and see if you get to have a character in this story!
am i the only one whos sad that the main charchter ends up dieng T_T
(May. 28, 2011 2:46 PM)Captain Caprii Wrote: [ -> ]am i the only one whos sad that the main charchter ends up dieng T_T
it's actually a thing that people do to make the story interesting
(May. 28, 2011 3:11 PM)quetzacoatl Wrote: [ -> ] (May. 28, 2011 2:46 PM)Captain Caprii Wrote: [ -> ]am i the only one whos sad that the main charchter ends up dieng T_T
it's actually a thing that people do to make the story interesting
Sorry, it's a suspense thing. Makes you want to read the story.
Anyways, hi! I'm back! The weekend was great, and I got a girlfriend (She lives far away from me, so it's a long distance relationship...)! So yeah, I'm back and the story will be updated soon.
awesome hope the relationship lasts
(Jun. 01, 2011 11:01 PM)Light Yagami Wrote: [ -> ]awesome hope the relationship lasts
Dang! That's what every single person I've told about this said! "I hope it lasts!" It's like people don't think long distance relationships work!
Sorry about that. Anyways, new chapter about 1/2 way done.
i think they work i mean that i hope it lasts a long time
super cool story! i like the idea of a backwards story! its really good!
Hey all! Sorry for not announcing it sooner, but I have received the winner. A lot of you PM'd me the correct answer, but one of you was first. It's Captain Caprii! Congratulations Capri, you've just won a character in this story! The rest of you, don't worry, this won't be the last contest I hold.
Toodooloos for now!
Woot just when i thought i didnt get it xD. need me to do charchter profile ?
(Jun. 03, 2011 2:22 AM)Captain Caprii Wrote: [ -> ]Woot just when i thought i didnt get it xD. need me to do charchter profile ?
Sure. Yeah, I looked back in my PM box and your PM was the oldest one about the title. Mozel Tov!
Name:Justin Clark
Bey blade:Ice Naixoos 145EA BS
Special Move
triking Crystal.Naixoos metal wheel will turn into ice and it will start striking in random places and its last strike will try to flip the opponents bey over to make it stop spinning
Personality:Quiet,Helpful,And will always stand up for a friend when needed
Bey Explanation: 145EA RS (145Eternal Attack and then its Round Spike. The spin track 145EA is kinda like ED except the 3 things are pointed spikes and RS has a whole bunch of spikes on the sides .Ice Is some what like storm except the normal storm stuff is switched with ice crystals and there's a very small gap between them and in between the gaps are small crystals sticking out .
Odd that this was practicly the first thing i won IN A LONG LONG TIME. ( caps arent needed but heh)
Great story, I like the idea of writing it backwards, don't think I've seen this done before
Looking forward to the end of it. Or should i say start?
Awesome story! You have mastered the fine art of writing!
Can't wait for chapter 3!
(Jun. 04, 2011 3:54 AM)Captain Caprii Wrote: [ -> ]descriptions
This isn't a beyblade story, why did you give a blader?
(Jun. 04, 2011 2:18 PM)HorogiumX Wrote: [ -> ]Awesome story! You have mastered the fine art of writing! Can't wait for chapter 3!
(Jun. 04, 2011 3:54 AM)Captain Caprii Wrote: [ -> ]descriptions
This isn't a beyblade story, why did you give a blader?
Because Sparta held a contentst to find out what AFFA meant and i guessed it first so he told me to make chrachter profile for him
you really should read all the post first
(Jun. 04, 2011 5:01 PM)Captain Caprii Wrote: [ -> ] (Jun. 04, 2011 2:18 PM)HorogiumX Wrote: [ -> ]Awesome story! You have mastered the fine art of writing! Can't wait for chapter 3!
(Jun. 04, 2011 3:54 AM)Captain Caprii Wrote: [ -> ]descriptions
This isn't a beyblade story, why did you give a blader?
Because Sparta held a contentst to find out what AFFA meant and i guessed it first so he told me to make chrachter profile for him you really should read all the post first
But he said the winner would get a character
in the story, so I think you're supposed to make a profile for that character. And why would Sparta want a Beyblade character profile anyway?
Beyblade doesn't fit into the story. Who would he battle? Would he battle Brad's words? I LOL at myself.
this isnt a beyblade story so why gave him a beyblade charcter
