World Beyblade Organization by Fighting Spirits Inc.

Full Version: Beyblade Burst: Burst Ultimate (Fan-Story)
You're currently viewing a stripped down version of our content. View the full version with proper formatting.
Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
So this has been on my list for a little while now and since there is no anime for Beyblade Burst: Burst Ultimate, i have decided to go the extra mile and write my own. Story Of Lanes Sister will finish this month as of this post being made and Angels and Star Ignition are currently on hold for a while until i find out better ideas for those stories, but without further ado, here is Beyblade Burst: BU.

Set directly after the events of Dynamite Battle, 5 pieces of a mysterious Star Fragment fall from the skies and it lands in different locations across the blading district of Japan and evolves a bladers bey.. One of these bladers being Bell Daikokuten and his Dangerous Belial which then evolves into Divine Belial, the apparent Ultimate Demon King Bey! With more legends rising up to the challenge with their new beys, the new age of Burst Ultimate is here!

Original Release Date was August 2022, new Release date is April 18th, 2022

Season 2?
(Apr. 18, 2022  2:40 AM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]So this has been on my list for a little while now and since there is no anime for Beyblade Burst: Burst Ultimate, i have decided to go the extra mile and write my own. Story Of Lanes Sister will finish this month as of this post being made and Angels and Star Ignition are currently on hold for a while until i find out better ideas for those stories, but without further ado, here is Beyblade Burst: BU.

Set directly after the events of Dynamite Battle, 5 pieces of a mysterious Star Fragment fall from the skies and it lands in different locations across the blading district of Japan and evolves a bladers bey.. One of these bladers being Bell Daikokuten and his Dangerous Belial which then evolves into Divine Belial, the apparent Ultimate Demon King Bey! With more legends rising up to the challenge with their new beys, the new age of Burst Ultimate is here!

Original Release Date was August 2022, new Release date is April 23rd, 2022

So Bell is still going to be the Main Character?
(Apr. 18, 2022  3:14 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]
(Apr. 18, 2022  2:40 AM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]So this has been on my list for a little while now and since there is no anime for Beyblade Burst: Burst Ultimate, i have decided to go the extra mile and write my own. Story Of Lanes Sister will finish this month as of this post being made and Angels and Star Ignition are currently on hold for a while until i find out better ideas for those stories, but without further ado, here is Beyblade Burst: BU.

Set directly after the events of Dynamite Battle, 5 pieces of a mysterious Star Fragment fall from the skies and it lands in different locations across the blading district of Japan and evolves a bladers bey.. One of these bladers being Bell Daikokuten and his Dangerous Belial which then evolves into Divine Belial, the apparent Ultimate Demon King Bey! With more legends rising up to the challenge with their new beys, the new age of Burst Ultimate is here!

Original Release Date was August 2022, new Release date is April 23rd, 2022

So Bell is still going to be the Main Character?

Yes. you are correct.
Sweet! I like the idea and am excited to see what happens
Episodes 1-51

Season 2 Episodes 1-15
(Apr. 18, 2022  2:40 AM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]So this has been on my list for a little while now and since there is no anime for Beyblade Burst: Burst Ultimate, i have decided to go the extra mile and write my own. Story Of Lanes Sister will finish this month as of this post being made and Angels and Star Ignition are currently on hold for a while until i find out better ideas for those stories, but without further ado, here is Beyblade Burst: BU.

Set directly after the events of Dynamite Battle, 5 pieces of a mysterious Star Fragment fall from the skies and it lands in different locations across the blading district of Japan and evolves a bladers bey.. One of these bladers being Bell Daikokuten and his Dangerous Belial which then evolves into Divine Belial, the apparent Ultimate Demon King Bey! With more legends rising up to the challenge with their new beys, the new age of Burst Ultimate is here!

Original Release Date was August 2022, new Release date is April 23rd, 2022

So the legendary bladers are Bell, Ken, Xhaka, Aiga and Drum. I would've expected Shu, Valt, Lui, and Free to be ones
1st Episode will be out today, be ready for that.

Full List Of Products (Fanmade included)
(Apr. 18, 2022  2:40 AM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]So this has been on my list for a little while now and since there is no anime for Beyblade Burst: Burst Ultimate, i have decided to go the extra mile and write my own. Story Of Lanes Sister will finish this month as of this post being made and Angels and Star Ignition are currently on hold for a while until i find out better ideas for those stories, but without further ado, here is Beyblade Burst: BU.

Set directly after the events of Dynamite Battle, 5 pieces of a mysterious Star Fragment fall from the skies and it lands in different locations across the blading district of Japan and evolves a bladers bey.. One of these bladers being Bell Daikokuten and his Dangerous Belial which then evolves into Divine Belial, the apparent Ultimate Demon King Bey! With more legends rising up to the challenge with their new beys, the new age of Burst Ultimate is here!

Original Release Date was August 2022, new Release date is April 23rd, 2022

I love the concept of this fanfic! It seems very amusing and out of this world (literally, with the star fragments and stuff) and also Looking forward to the first episode!
(Apr. 18, 2022  8:49 PM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]1st Episode will be out today, be ready for that.

Yessir!
Episode 1: The Star That Fell! Star Fragment!!
https://www.wattpad.com/1215624287-beybl...sode-1-the
(Apr. 19, 2022  2:20 AM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]Episode 1: The Star That Fell! Star Fragment!!
https://www.wattpad.com/1215624287-beybl...sode-1-the

Man, you work extremely fast! I'm really liking the start of this series so far, keep it up Delta!
Episode 2: The Ultimate Demon King! Divine Belial!!
https://www.wattpad.com/1216530259-beybl...sode-2-the
Just finished the two episodes! It seems to have a much better feel than DB, so I'm super excited to see what this turns into! Can't wait for the Aiga VS Bell battle in episode 3!!!
(Apr. 20, 2022  5:50 AM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]Episode 2: The Ultimate Demon King! Divine Belial!!
https://www.wattpad.com/1216530259-beybl...sode-2-the

I’m loving this series keep it up
New Bladers (Descriptions coming soon)

Chiyoh Rei (Savior Perseus.Lg.Vn-3/Ring Cassiel.Ov.Tc-8)
Gigi Ishikawa (Arrow Griffin.Ov.HEt-6)

Beyblade Burst BU Episode 3: Dragged Into Darkness! The Gates Of Hell Open!!
https://www.wattpad.com/1216979308-beybl...-3-dragged

(Apr. 18, 2022  2:27 PM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]Episodes 1-38

We donot really know about the other beys so it would be best to wait a bit for more information for the later episodes.
(Apr. 23, 2022  9:48 AM)BladerSpryzen Wrote: [ -> ]
(Apr. 18, 2022  2:27 PM)DeltaZakuro Wrote: [ -> ]Episodes 1-38

We donot really know about the other beys so it would be best to wait a bit for more information for the later episodes.

The Episodes do not mention the prefixes with the exceptions of Kerbeus and Dragon, which already have their names revealed. Achilles and Xcalibur episodes will be updated when their official names are revealed and confirmed.

Character: Chiyoh Rei (Spoilers ahead)
I have an idea regarding an implementation of a character into the story as a minor Antag/Returning canon.

Essentially what I was thinking is that you can use a basis of Prominence Valkyrie in order to bring in Phi. We can have a little fun Phoenix vs Phoenix action in which Phi goes after Phenomeno due to his belief in there being only “one Phoenix”. This leads to more shenanigans and sets him up as a returning threat.
Is there going to be a Character Contest for this Beyblade Series? I'm just curious because if there is then I'm definitely entering.
(Apr. 24, 2022  2:16 AM)UnseenBurst Wrote: [ -> ]Is there going to be a Character Contest for this Beyblade Series? I'm just curious because if there is then I'm definitely entering.

So far, i have no intentions on doing one at the current moment

Beyblade Burst BU Episode 4: Fierce Battle! Bell VS Valt!!
https://www.wattpad.com/1218035410-beybl...e-4-fierce

Royal Cassiel.Over.Traction-8 (RCS.Ov.Tc-8)
--------------------------------------------------

Royal Blade [R]
A Right Spin DB/BU Blade with a very round and circular shape, the Blade is very thick and features a layer of ridged points (which resembles that of asteroids) on top of a bottom layer which is incredibly smooth and has metal built into the blade for weight and OWD. The blades gimmick is that the ridged upper layer has a spring, rebounding any and all attacks. The Blades colors is purple, red, gold with small blue highlights

Cassiel Core [CS]
A Vertical Right Spin DB/BU Core with a Cassiel Motif, the angel of Saturn! The cores design features a front facing angel face which closely resembles the Uranus face from Sparking but has 3 orbs going down from top to the center of core the just above the face with incredibly ornate designs going about the core. The cores colors are purple, gold, red with some blue highlights. The core features Metal along the outside of the core and has no teeth but rubber stoppers.

8 Armor [+/-8]
An Armor with 8 points of contact, splitting the weight into 8 points, 4 on both sides. The armors design just looks 6 with 2 added points of weight.

Over Disk [Ov] (Metallic Purple)

Traction Driver [Tc]
A Bulky and wide driver with a cone plate surrounding a hemispherical POM Ball tip which spins freely. The cone surrounding the ball can also spin freely and is meant to reduce being pushed back or resist being knocked out of the stadium.

Owner: Chiyoh Rei (Main Antagonist)

Detonation Belial3.Cn'-4 (DtBL3.Cn'-4)
--------------------------------------------------

Detonation Blade (Dt)
A Right Spin DB Blade with a 3 sided shape akin to the Dynamite Blade but the blade is more thick and jagged and the blades have different sections to it. The blade has a bound gimmick with a part that looks like the A-Gear. It also features L-Gears Metal and F-Gears Rubber in the blade.

Belial3 Core (BL3)
A Diagonal oriented DB Core like Valkyrie2 with a Belial motif, A Demon King. The face design is almost like Valkyrie2 but more demonic and the wings are replaced with flames and a demons horn. The colors are also the same as the Belial1 core with Gold along the outer parts. the core has metal and rubber with 4 very powerful locks

4 Armor (+/-4)
A DB Armor with 4 points of weight. The Armors design is around the same as 2 but the 2 points are split apart to make 4 points

Connection' Driver (Cn')
A Disk+Driver fusion with a flippable disk section. 

The Disk part is basically the "Nexus disk" from Almight but a bit more jagged and a bit heavier and it isn't compatible with S-Gear/D-Gear. It can also be placed on the Almight Driver. The driver section is basically the same as Almight but it has Metal imbedded into the bottom from the V-Gear, the driver is electric and the main gimmick is that when the driver activates, the tip inside of the free spinning plate starts to spin rapidly, speeding up the bey greatly like Hybrid.

Owner: Bell Daikokuten

Realm Ragnaruk.Gg.MR-6
--------------------------------------------------

Ragnaruk2 Core (RG2)
A Horizontal Right Spin DB Core with a Ragnaruk motif, the event of a fiery doomsday. The cores design is akin to the Ragnaruk Sparking Chip with a dark blue outer frame with 7 teeth of medium height. the core also has metal along the outer frame.

Realm Blade (Rl)
A Right Spin DB Blade which is basically Glide ported over to a DB Blade, but the blade is more bulkier and the stamina wings are tipped with metal contact.

6 Armor (+/-6)

Giga Disk (Gg)

Metal Revolve (MR)

Owner: Ranzo Kiyama
Aight, I do have a major criticism regarding this chapter: Its the character of Chiyoh.

Their bey’s awakening is just… it feels completely out of place. I also don’t like the fact that the bey’s canonical combo was changed, they defeated Bell so easily(Ik Bell’s still getting used to Divine Belial but considering how quickly they mastered Dangerous Belial that also leaves a semi plot hole), and that they were introduced so quickly. I personally believe you introduced them way too early in the story, and I feel as if it would be better to save them for later. I’ve been enjoying the story so far but I am not a fan of the most recent chapter.
What I personally would have recommended is to have Chiyoh appear later on down the line, and have them struggle before eventually growing stronger, almost as a parallel to the Protag. An op for no reason antagonist is not a good antagonist.

I am unfortunately going to have to give this chapter a 3/10. The battle with Valt saves it from being a 1 or 2, but I do hope that u take what I have to say into consideration.
Beyblade Burst BU Episode 5: The Shining Perseus!!
https://www.wattpad.com/1218432428-beybl...sode-5-the
I’m sorry once more but this episode is worse than the prior one. I get you’re trying to set up Chiyoh as a major character with a ton of power, but still… bursting Belial and then BREAKING Raphael so quickly? The power scaling is completely out of place. I’m really being taken out of the story right now, and those events should have occurred much later on in the story.
2/10.


The reason behind Perseus's combo change was mainly because i do not approve of a stamina driver being put on an attack layer like Savior, hence why i gave it a combo that better fit Perseus and Chiyoh being introduced early serves the purpose of helping Bell grow and have a secondary (fourth if you feel so inclined to include Rashad and Basara) rival but more on this will be revealed in episodes going forward and her complete backstory will soon be revealed, that's not a joke or "advertising" ploy, that's actually happening and i'm serious about it.

Everything else you mentioned is simply your opinion and your opinion alone. I may not agree with it but what can i do huh? I can simply write and provide the episodes for those who take the time from their day to read it, nothing more and nothing less. You and i have very different ideals when it comes to writing and i'm more than positive that you can see that as much as i can, its subjective to the discretion of the reader/viewer on whether or not they think something is good or not

If there is anything else you need then please by all means contact me, i've cleared the air as best as i possibly could here.

~ DeltaZakuro
Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7