World Beyblade Organization by Fighting Spirits Inc.
Delete - Printable Version

+- World Beyblade Organization by Fighting Spirits Inc. (https://worldbeyblade.org)
+-- Forum: Off-Topic Forums (https://worldbeyblade.org/Forum-Off-Topic-Forums)
+--- Forum: Your Creations (https://worldbeyblade.org/Forum-Your-Creations)
+--- Thread: Delete (/Thread-Delete--63542)



Delete - M.Pheles - Oct. 28, 2013

NVM this story!


RE: I like you'r Fro ! - LimiTTrickster - Oct. 28, 2013

Great spelling and good use of vocabulary. But I think you need to work on your grammar and punctuation, and also your paragraphing. This will make the story easear to read, and also make it pook neat. Also, try to stick to one tense. There was a lot of switching from past, present and future. Hope this helps.


RE: I like you'r Fro ! - RagerBlade - Oct. 28, 2013

It's a little short... Other than that and grammar it's good! Keep going!


RE: I like you'r Fro ! - M.Pheles - Oct. 29, 2013

Thanks guys! This really happened to me in real life lol. That's why it was hard to make Chapter 1, but I got some other things to put in.