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+--- Thread: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow (/Thread-Beyblade-Story-Emotional-Overflow)
[Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Aug. 18, 2013
I wrote this story when I was about 12 years old. It was pretty bad and a bit embarrassing to read over, so I deleted it.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - 6 God - Aug. 18, 2013
Didn't see any mistakes. This is going to turn out to be a Beyblade story right?
lol. Seems pretty good!
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Aug. 18, 2013
Aha, yah XD It's starting slow, I just gotta build up the scenery if you know what I mean.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Samurai_Ifraid1 - Aug. 18, 2013
Can't wait for more
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - SwitchBlayder - Aug. 18, 2013
It gets the switchblad3r seal of approval, sooo much detail. Awesome job
I will have to see chapter 2 before I vote though.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - LimiTTrickster - Aug. 18, 2013
Great job in building the scene, I can tell this will be a very good story.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - ★WindStarElite★ - Aug. 18, 2013
Awesome ima make a bey story Beyblade:The Phoenix King Awakens
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - kyoyatategami - Aug. 18, 2013
I do not see anything wrong. I can't wait to see how this turns into a beyblade story though. It should be interesting and I hope you upload more chapters soon.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - LimiTTrickster - Aug. 18, 2013
You are a really good writer, and I didn't spot any grammar mistakes.
P.S, I have read all your other stories ad they were all AWESOME!
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Aug. 19, 2013
Thanks! Chapter 2 probably won't be up till later this week, with the tournament, then school and cross country.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - кαмυι カムイ - Aug. 20, 2013
I saw a capitilization error in "why are you sitting alone" Other than that I love this.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Aug. 26, 2013
Chapter 2 is up! Sorry its really short.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - DefStamina88 - Aug. 27, 2013
On an off note, I like how Sabrina plays tennis. XD
Seriously though, I like this man. It's amazing. Hope it keeps up!!
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Aug. 28, 2013
Thanks! That means so much coming from an amazing writer like you!
Chapter 3 is up by the way!
Sorry for the double post, but chapter 4 is up too!
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - DefStamina88 - Aug. 29, 2013
I'm liking the story a lot, but I think you should put spaces between your dialogue and paragraphs. It makes it easier to read and lengthens your chapter a bit.
Other than that, still awesome!
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Aug. 30, 2013
Do you mean:
Like this?
I tried doing it, but it just got messed up and so I gave up
But thanks!
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - DefStamina88 - Aug. 30, 2013
I kinda mean like how I normally post, perhaps 2-4 sentences, then a split. It cleans it up a bit easier and makes it easy to transition into a new paragraph.
Look at how I post. See how I leave that space to transition into a new topic. That's kinda what you should do.
You can also look at a couple other stories around here to use for reference.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Aug. 30, 2013
Ah, I gotcha. I'll definitely try to do that, thanks!
Depending on homework, chapter 5 may be up today.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Sep. 01, 2013
Chapter 5 is up! I may write chapter 6 soon.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - LimiTTrickster - Sep. 01, 2013
Great story so far. Nice suspense in the new chapter.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Sep. 03, 2013
Chapter 6 is up! Sorry its short.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - DefStamina88 - Sep. 04, 2013
I think the content is very interesting. I love it. However, you should really try spacing the lines as I mentioned before. It makes it look longer.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Sep. 05, 2013
Arg, I was in a rush, so I forgot about that. I'll do that next chapter.
But thanks for the compliments! The next chapter will probably be up by the end of the week.
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - Dual - Sep. 09, 2013
Ok, chapter 7 is up!
RE: [Beyblade Story] Emotional Overflow - DefStamina88 - Sep. 09, 2013
Much better!! Now, when I space, I space between every dialogue switch, but I can see here that if you did so, it would've been MASSIVE, so it was actually a good move not to space EVERYTHING.
I'm loving the plot! Keep this up and you'll be like your old pal Deffy.