RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 14, 2021
lol Delta is always savage
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 14, 2021
true that but what about fumiya he said that his litte sister and amane brother can fight
(May. 14, 2021 4:00 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: lol Delta is always savage
w\in sparkling where is delta that was always a mystery i meen drum/dante came back so what about delta
this is what Jayden from my fan fic looks like https://avachara.com/avatar/snapshot.php
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 14, 2021
Name: Asher Suzuki
Age: 11
Personality: Super friendly loves to battle friends he made his bey based on Apollo because he loved hearing stories about Apollo that his parents read him
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 14, 2021
(May. 14, 2021 7:44 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Name: Asher Suzuki
Age: 11
Personality: Super friendly loves to battle friends he made his bey based on Apollo because he loved hearing stories about Apollo that his parents read him
Nice
(May. 14, 2021 7:44 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Name: Asher Suzuki
Age: 11
Personality: Super friendly loves to battle friends he made his bey based on Apollo because he loved hearing stories about Apollo that his parents read him
im curios about justin
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 14, 2021
Name: Justin Aoki
Age: 11
Personality: Used to be shy as heck in till he met Asher Suzuki. Asher showed him how to step out of his shell even when he was being bullied. He built Janus based off a show that he and Asher used to watch Called Janus Vs Apollo. Asher and Justin are so close it's like they are brothers.
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 14, 2021
nice i have never met anyone shy
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 15, 2021
Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 23
Time To Get Serious
Valt: We need to make a plan.
Me: How about I go first!!
Hyuga: But I wanna go first!!
Valt: Well we all have attack types so we have a big advantage!!
Me: Can I please go first!!
Hyuga: Fine.
Valt: Then it’s settled!!
(Would Team Valt come up to the stage your match is starting)
Me: Time to make my debut!!!
Announcer: Alright everyone we have a special match for you!!!! The BC Sol gang Vs The Attacking Musketeers!!!
Free: I’m going first.
Silas: Wait but--
(Free’s eyes flash dangerously)
Rantaro: *Gasps*
Valt: Go out there and win Asher!!!
Me: Oh I will!!
Announcer: Our first match will be Asher Suzuki Vs Free De La Hoya!!!
Me: Isn’t this cool we get to face off again!!!
Free:..
Me: You good bro?
(Free’s eyes flash dangerously)
Free: Get ready!!!
Me: *Gasps*
Ref: First battle!! Ready set!!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Free: Start things off with Gyrate Break!!!
(Fafnir picks up serious speed, Fafnir sends Apollo flying out of the stadium)
Me: Apollo no!!
(Valt catches Apollo, Apollo bursts in his hand)
Ref: It’s Gyrate Fafnir with a ring-out finish!! Free claims one point!!
Free: Go get your bey!!!!
Me: Yeah.
Valt: Here you go!!!
Me: Thanks!! Have any idea why Free was so mad?
Valt: He’s not mad he’s focused. You should be too!!
Hyuga: Yeah you need to break your limits!!
Me: Got it!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance)
Free: You ready!!
Me: (No Comment)
(Free’s Thoughts) Finally, he’s in the zone!!
Ref: Second battle!! Ready set!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
Announcer: Both beys start off strong!! Apollo and Fafnir start accelerating out of who knows where!!!
Me: Nexus Launch!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
(Apollo dodges Fafnir)
Announcer: Apollo just dodges Fafnir with its high speed!!!
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Apollo: Let’s go, Asher!!!
Me: Yeah!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo enters Hyper Flare)
Free: Gyrate Claw!!!!
Me: Nexus Recoil!!!
(Both beys hit each other out of the stadium)
Me/Free: *Gasps*
Announcer: After they hit each other with the attacks of the century it ends in a draw!! Wait the referee has not made a call!!
Ref: Commence replay!!!
(Screen replays battle)
Me: Come on.
(Screen shows that Fafnir landed first)
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a ring-out finish 1 point!!
Hyuga: He broke his limits!!!!
Valt: That’s Asher for you!!
(Free roars)
Me: *Gasps*
Free: I am taking you down in the next battle!!!
Me: Not gonna happen!!
Ref: Third battle!! Ready set!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Me: Nexus Force!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
Announcer: Both beys start off accelerating out of this world!!
(Enormous Explosion occurs)
Me: Apollo!!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo starts radiating Hyper Flare)
Harry: *Gasps*
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Me: Nexus Whip!!!
Free: Gyrate Spin!!!
(Fafnir starts spinning faster)
Me: End this!! Nexus Recoil Impact!!!
(Apollo sends Fafnir flying out of the stadium)
Free: *Gasps*
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a ring-out finish. Asher Suzuki wins with a score of 2-1!!!
Me: I won!?
Valt: You sure did!!
Free: GG man you did it.
Me: You taught me how to stay focused during battle to become stronger!!
Free: Not my idea.
Me: Wait what?
Free: Valt knew you could become stronger but you needed to stay focused.
Valt: Nice job Free!!
(Free walks back)
Silas: I am going up to crush them!!
Free: Go get us the lead!!
Hyuga: Time to go zoom!!
Valt: Go out there and win!!
Announcer: Silas Karslile Vs Hyuga Hizashai!!! This battle is going to be sweet!!
Silas: You're not beating me again!!
Hyuga: I am going to break all my limits!!
Ref: First battle!! Ready set!!!
Silas/Hyuga: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Silas: Satomb take the center!!!
Hyuga: Kabam!!!
Announcer: Satomb takes the center to brush off Hyperion’s wild flurry of attacks!!!!
Silas: I’m not going to lose!!!
(Hyperion hits Satomb off balance)
Silas: Satomb!!!!
(Silas enters Hyper Resonance, Satomb enters Hyper Flare)
Hyuga: What the!?
Silas: Jinx Drift!!!
(Satomb sends Hyperion flying)
Hyuga: Hyperion!!!
(Hyuga enters Hyper Resonance, Hyperion enters Hyper Flare)
Silas: Not gonna happen!! Roller defense!!!
Hyuga: Inferno Strike!!!
(Hyperion speeds up, Satomb bursts)
Ref: Inferno Hyperion with a burst finish!! Hyuga Hizashi wins!!
Announcer: Team Valt is now in the lead with 2 wins!! If they win the Tag Battle
Hyuga: I won!!!
Silas: Grrr!!!
Rantaro: Don’t worry we will win the Tag Battles!!!
Free: Rantaro and Silas you're going up.
Rantaro: I’m going to win!!!
Silas: Don’t lose!!!
Valt: So I’m going up but who’s going with me!!
Hyuga: Asher is!!
Me: *gasps*
Hyuga: You're going to do great!!
Me: Thanks Hyuga!!
Announcer: Alright for our tag battle we will be doing Valt and Asher!!
Vs Rantaro and Silas!! Let’s begin!!
Summary for Chapter 24 Team Free is going to have a hard time battling Team Shu and we are going to have to train hard against Team Aiger
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 15, 2021
(May. 15, 2021 8:49 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 23
Time To Get Serious
Valt: We need to make a plan.
Me: How about I go first!!
Hyuga: But I wanna go first!!
Valt: Well we all have attack types so we have a big advantage!!
Me: Can I please go first!!
Hyuga: Fine.
Valt: Then it’s settled!!
(Would Team Valt come up to the stage your match is starting)
Me: Time to make my debut!!!
Announcer: Alright everyone we have a special match for you!!!! The BC Sol gang Vs The Attacking Musketeers!!!
Free: I’m going first.
Silas: Wait but--
(Free’s eyes flash dangerously)
Rantaro: *Gasps*
Valt: Go out there and win Asher!!!
Me: Oh I will!!
Announcer: Our first match will be Asher Suzuki Vs Free De La Hoya!!!
Me: Isn’t this cool we get to face off again!!!
Free:..
Me: You good bro?
(Free’s eyes flash dangerously)
Free: Get ready!!!
Me: *Gasps*
Ref: First battle!! Ready set!!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Free: Start things off with Gyrate Break!!!
(Fafnir picks up serious speed, Fafnir sends Apollo flying out of the stadium)
Me: Apollo no!!
(Valt catches Apollo, Apollo bursts in his hand)
Ref: It’s Gyrate Fafnir with a ring-out finish!! Free claims one point!!
Free: Go get your bey!!!!
Me: Yeah.
Valt: Here you go!!!
Me: Thanks!! Have any idea why Free was so mad?
Valt: He’s not mad he’s focused. You should be too!!
Hyuga: Yeah you need to break your limits!!
Me: Got it!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance)
Free: You ready!!
Me: (No Comment)
(Free’s Thoughts) Finally, he’s in the zone!!
Ref: Second battle!! Ready set!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
Announcer: Both beys start off strong!! Apollo and Fafnir start accelerating out of who knows where!!!
Me: Nexus Launch!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
(Apollo dodges Fafnir)
Announcer: Apollo just dodges Fafnir with its high speed!!!
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Apollo: Let’s go, Asher!!!
Me: Yeah!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo enters Hyper Flare)
Free: Gyrate Claw!!!!
Me: Nexus Recoil!!!
(Both beys hit each other out of the stadium)
Me/Free: *Gasps*
Announcer: After they hit each other with the attacks of the century it ends in a draw!! Wait the referee has not made a call!!
Ref: Commence replay!!!
(Screen replays battle)
Me: Come on.
(Screen shows that Fafnir landed first)
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a ring-out finish 1 point!!
Hyuga: He broke his limits!!!!
Valt: That’s Asher for you!!
(Free roars)
Me: *Gasps*
Free: I am taking you down in the next battle!!!
Me: Not gonna happen!!
Ref: Third battle!! Ready set!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Me: Nexus Force!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
Announcer: Both beys start off accelerating out of this world!!
(Enormous Explosion occurs)
Me: Apollo!!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo starts radiating Hyper Flare)
Harry: *Gasps*
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Me: Nexus Whip!!!
Free: Gyrate Spin!!!
(Fafnir starts spinning faster)
Me: End this!! Nexus Recoil Impact!!!
(Apollo sends Fafnir flying out of the stadium)
Free: *Gasps*
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a ring-out finish. Asher Suzuki wins with a score of 2-1!!!
Me: I won!?
Valt: You sure did!!
Free: GG man you did it.
Me: You taught me how to stay focused during battle to become stronger!!
Free: Not my idea.
Me: Wait what?
Free: Valt knew you could become stronger but you needed to stay focused.
Valt: Nice job Free!!
(Free walks back)
Silas: I am going up to crush them!!
Free: Go get us the lead!!
Hyuga: Time to go zoom!!
Valt: Go out there and win!!
Announcer: Silas Karslile Vs Hyuga Hizashai!!! This battle is going to be sweet!!
Silas: You're not beating me again!!
Hyuga: I am going to break all my limits!!
Ref: First battle!! Ready set!!!
Silas/Hyuga: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Silas: Satomb take the center!!!
Hyuga: Kabam!!!
Announcer: Satomb takes the center to brush off Hyperion’s wild flurry of attacks!!!!
Silas: I’m not going to lose!!!
(Hyperion hits Satomb off balance)
Silas: Satomb!!!!
(Silas enters Hyper Resonance, Satomb enters Hyper Flare)
Hyuga: What the!?
Silas: Jinx Drift!!!
(Satomb sends Hyperion flying)
Hyuga: Hyperion!!!
(Hyuga enters Hyper Resonance, Hyperion enters Hyper Flare)
Silas: Not gonna happen!! Roller defense!!!
Hyuga: Inferno Strike!!!
(Hyperion speeds up, Satomb bursts)
Ref: Inferno Hyperion with a burst finish!! Hyuga Hizashi wins!!
Announcer: Team Valt is now in the lead with 2 wins!! If they win the Tag Battle
Hyuga: I won!!!
Silas: Grrr!!!
Rantaro: Don’t worry we will win the Tag Battles!!!
Free: Rantaro and Silas you're going up.
Rantaro: I’m going to win!!!
Silas: Don’t lose!!!
Valt: So I’m going up but who’s going with me!!
Hyuga: Asher is!!
Me: *gasps*
Hyuga: You're going to do great!!
Me: Thanks Hyuga!!
Announcer: Alright for our tag battle we will be doing Valt and Asher!!
Vs Rantaro and Silas!! Let’s begin!!
Summary for Chapter 24 Team Free is going to have a hard time battling Team Shu and we are going to have to train hard against Team Aiger
Free is not the type of guy who would say gg or go get your bey he would say good job of something like that besides that good job strike
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 15, 2021
(May. 15, 2021 9:47 PM)JJustice Wrote: (May. 15, 2021 8:49 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 23
Time To Get Serious
Valt: We need to make a plan.
Me: How about I go first!!
Hyuga: But I wanna go first!!
Valt: Well we all have attack types so we have a big advantage!!
Me: Can I please go first!!
Hyuga: Fine.
Valt: Then it’s settled!!
(Would Team Valt come up to the stage your match is starting)
Me: Time to make my debut!!!
Announcer: Alright everyone we have a special match for you!!!! The BC Sol gang Vs The Attacking Musketeers!!!
Free: I’m going first.
Silas: Wait but--
(Free’s eyes flash dangerously)
Rantaro: *Gasps*
Valt: Go out there and win Asher!!!
Me: Oh I will!!
Announcer: Our first match will be Asher Suzuki Vs Free De La Hoya!!!
Me: Isn’t this cool we get to face off again!!!
Free:..
Me: You good bro?
(Free’s eyes flash dangerously)
Free: Get ready!!!
Me: *Gasps*
Ref: First battle!! Ready set!!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Free: Start things off with Gyrate Break!!!
(Fafnir picks up serious speed, Fafnir sends Apollo flying out of the stadium)
Me: Apollo no!!
(Valt catches Apollo, Apollo bursts in his hand)
Ref: It’s Gyrate Fafnir with a ring-out finish!! Free claims one point!!
Free: Go get your bey!!!!
Me: Yeah.
Valt: Here you go!!!
Me: Thanks!! Have any idea why Free was so mad?
Valt: He’s not mad he’s focused. You should be too!!
Hyuga: Yeah you need to break your limits!!
Me: Got it!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance)
Free: You ready!!
Me: (No Comment)
(Free’s Thoughts) Finally, he’s in the zone!!
Ref: Second battle!! Ready set!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
Announcer: Both beys start off strong!! Apollo and Fafnir start accelerating out of who knows where!!!
Me: Nexus Launch!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
(Apollo dodges Fafnir)
Announcer: Apollo just dodges Fafnir with its high speed!!!
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Apollo: Let’s go, Asher!!!
Me: Yeah!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo enters Hyper Flare)
Free: Gyrate Claw!!!!
Me: Nexus Recoil!!!
(Both beys hit each other out of the stadium)
Me/Free: *Gasps*
Announcer: After they hit each other with the attacks of the century it ends in a draw!! Wait the referee has not made a call!!
Ref: Commence replay!!!
(Screen replays battle)
Me: Come on.
(Screen shows that Fafnir landed first)
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a ring-out finish 1 point!!
Hyuga: He broke his limits!!!!
Valt: That’s Asher for you!!
(Free roars)
Me: *Gasps*
Free: I am taking you down in the next battle!!!
Me: Not gonna happen!!
Ref: Third battle!! Ready set!!
Me/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Me: Nexus Force!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
Announcer: Both beys start off accelerating out of this world!!
(Enormous Explosion occurs)
Me: Apollo!!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo starts radiating Hyper Flare)
Harry: *Gasps*
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Me: Nexus Whip!!!
Free: Gyrate Spin!!!
(Fafnir starts spinning faster)
Me: End this!! Nexus Recoil Impact!!!
(Apollo sends Fafnir flying out of the stadium)
Free: *Gasps*
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a ring-out finish. Asher Suzuki wins with a score of 2-1!!!
Me: I won!?
Valt: You sure did!!
Free: GG man you did it.
Me: You taught me how to stay focused during battle to become stronger!!
Free: Not my idea.
Me: Wait what?
Free: Valt knew you could become stronger but you needed to stay focused.
Valt: Nice job Free!!
(Free walks back)
Silas: I am going up to crush them!!
Free: Go get us the lead!!
Hyuga: Time to go zoom!!
Valt: Go out there and win!!
Announcer: Silas Karslile Vs Hyuga Hizashai!!! This battle is going to be sweet!!
Silas: You're not beating me again!!
Hyuga: I am going to break all my limits!!
Ref: First battle!! Ready set!!!
Silas/Hyuga: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Silas: Satomb take the center!!!
Hyuga: Kabam!!!
Announcer: Satomb takes the center to brush off Hyperion’s wild flurry of attacks!!!!
Silas: I’m not going to lose!!!
(Hyperion hits Satomb off balance)
Silas: Satomb!!!!
(Silas enters Hyper Resonance, Satomb enters Hyper Flare)
Hyuga: What the!?
Silas: Jinx Drift!!!
(Satomb sends Hyperion flying)
Hyuga: Hyperion!!!
(Hyuga enters Hyper Resonance, Hyperion enters Hyper Flare)
Silas: Not gonna happen!! Roller defense!!!
Hyuga: Inferno Strike!!!
(Hyperion speeds up, Satomb bursts)
Ref: Inferno Hyperion with a burst finish!! Hyuga Hizashi wins!!
Announcer: Team Valt is now in the lead with 2 wins!! If they win the Tag Battle
Hyuga: I won!!!
Silas: Grrr!!!
Rantaro: Don’t worry we will win the Tag Battles!!!
Free: Rantaro and Silas you're going up.
Rantaro: I’m going to win!!!
Silas: Don’t lose!!!
Valt: So I’m going up but who’s going with me!!
Hyuga: Asher is!!
Me: *gasps*
Hyuga: You're going to do great!!
Me: Thanks Hyuga!!
Announcer: Alright for our tag battle we will be doing Valt and Asher!!
Vs Rantaro and Silas!! Let’s begin!!
Summary for Chapter 24 Team Free is going to have a hard time battling Team Shu and we are going to have to train hard against Team Aiger
Free is not the type of guy who would say gg or go get your bey he would say good job of something like that besides that good job strike
So I added some intense Dioluoge because Free wanted to show him how to get serious so he was acting not actually serious
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 15, 2021
On ok 👌good job with this chapter
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - USN - May. 17, 2021
(May. 15, 2021 8:49 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 23
Time To Get Serious
Summary for Chapter 24 Team Free is going to have a hard time battling Team Shu and we are going to have to train hard against Team Aiger
This is my first ever rating so I might not do to well:
Plot 3/5: Overall the plot development has improved a lot but, this chapter did not have much effect of the plot. (And that's okay.)
Character 4/5: Again, major improvement. The reason you didn't get perfect was mentioned by JJustice.
Description 1/5: Pretty much no description.
Battles 3/5: Again, could use more description.
Dialogue 5/5: There was alot of good dialogue. WE NEED LESS GRRS.
16/25
Overall, not your best chapter.
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 17, 2021
alright here is my rating
plot 4/5 there was somthing about i just did not under stand
Character 4/5: on this one i agree with USN
Description 2/5: i did not get anything from it
Battles 4/5; i like the battles but some times they can be way to long
grammer 5/5: I LOVE THE GRRR
15/20
need a little improvement
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 17, 2021
Chapter 24's name has been revealed
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 17, 2021
(May. 17, 2021 4:11 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Chapter 24's name has been revealed ok i'm pumped
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 17, 2021
Chapter 24 is out!!! Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 24
Guts Vs Strategy
Announcer: Valt Aoi and Asher Suzuki have the face of victory on their faces!!
(I run-up to the stadium, I trip)
Me: Woah!!!
Valt: Uh.
Silas: This should be easy!!
Valt: Don’t underestimate us!!
Announcer: Alright with the introduction out of the way let’s get started!!!
Ref: First battle, Ready set!!!
Valt/Rantaro/Silas/Me: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Valt: Rush Launch!!!
Me: Nexus Launch!!!
Announcer: Apollo and Valtrek start hitting Roktavor with a flurry of attacks!!!
Rantaro: Roktavor!!! Triple Wing Cyclone!!!!
Announcer: Roktavor creates a strong wind tornado and sends Apollo and Valtrek flying!!!
Silas: Now Satomb!!!
Announcer: Satomb is attacking them from all sides!! Their well-timed strategy might lead to their win!!!
Valt: Valtrek!!!
(Valt enters Hyper Resonance, Valtrek enters Hyper Flare)
Me: Apollo!!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo enters Hyper Flare)
(Valtrek hits Apollo to get out of the barrage)
Announcer: Wow Apollo and Valtrek get out of a sticky situation!!!
Valt: Hero Flash Launch!!!
(Valtrek speeds up down the slope)
Silas: *Gasps*
Rantaro: Not yet!!!
(Roktavor hits Valtrek with the Cyclone, Valtrek and Roktavor burst)
Valt: *Gasps*
Announcer: Roktavor gets in the way of a wicked attack made for Satomb!!! But Satomb keeps attacking Apollo!!!
Me: No!!
Valt: Just remember just because they have strategy doesn't mean they will win. We got guts!!!
(I enter Deep Resonance)
Me: Nexus Force!!!
Announcer: Apollo picks up speed and catches onto the rim of the stadium!!!
Me: Nexus Flash!!!
(Apollo picks up serious speed, Satomb bursts)
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a burst finish. Team Valt wins with a score of 3-0.
Me: I did it!!!
Valt: You sure did!!
Hyuga: Man that was awesome!!
Rantaro: Man, you always find a way to surprise me!!
Silas: Well, since you beat us you can’t lose from here on out, got it!!
Me: I am going to win this thing!!!
Free: Asher Suzuki, how strong will you become?
Announcer: Alright, we now have our second round matchups!!!
Me: Wonder who we will face next!!
Announcer: The first battle will be!! Team Free Vs Team Shu!!
Harry: This is going to be fun!!
Valt: I can’t wait to watch this battle!!!
Announcer: Our second round will be!!! Team Aiger Vs Team Valt!!!
Dante: I can’t wait we’re facing Valt!!!
Aiger: Oh yeah!!!
Hikaru: We are winning!!!
Announcer: These matchups will be extra hot!!! I will see you tomorrow!!!
(I walk into Harry)
Me: Sorry man, didn,t see you there!!!
Harry: Move.
Me: Ok.
(Harry mumbles)
Harry: This kid beat Free!?
Me: I sure did!!!
Harry: You don’t stand a chance in this tournament!!
Me: *Gasps*
(Justin, Emma Jake, and Noah come over)
Justin: Harry stop it!!
Harry: You're inexperienced, weak, and lack strategy!!!
Me: Uno Reverse Card!!
Justin/Emma/Jake/Noah: ooooooooo
(Harry walks away)
Jake: Sick burn man!!
(I smile)
Me: Gotta go train with the team! Wanna come!?
Justin/Emma/Jake/Noah: No duh!!
(At raging bulls)
Harry: I have had to break everything in my path to become this strong!!! And he can become stronger by having fun!!!
(Harry flashes back)
Arthur: Go!! Final Blast!!!
(Harry’s bey breaks)
Harry: No.
Arthur: The weak have no place here!!
(Harry runs away to his hideout)
Harry: I will break Apocalypse!!!
Harry: The only way to blade!! Is to break beys!!!
(Harry finishes creating a new bey)
Harry: Basal Hermes!!!
(Harry goes back to Inferno)
Arthur: Didn’t I tell you not to come back?
Harry: I have got a new bey that will destroy Apocalypse!!
Arthur: Fine.
Arthur/Harry: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Harry: Basal Blast!!!
(Apocalypse breaks)
Arthur: *Gasps*
Harry: I won!!!!
(Arthur picks up Apocalypse parts)
Hermes: Harry!! Let’s destroy every bey!!!
Harry: Yes. Yes, we will!!
(Harry returns to the present)
Hermes: Destroying Apollo again will be fun!!
Harry: I can’t wait to crush him!!!
Shu: *Gasps*
(Next Day)
(Me and Justin start racing to the Arena)
Justin: I’m not gonna lose!!
Me: Well I ain’t gonna lose ethier!!!
(Harry walks past us)
Justin: Abort!!!
(We crash into a bush)
Me: Ow.
Harry: What a joke.
(Inside the Arena)
Announcer: Alright folks today we have a special match for you all!!!
(Crowd goes wild)
Announcer: Team Free!!! Vs Team Shu this match will be loads of fun!!!
Free: I’m going first.
Rantaro: Go for it!!!
Silas: Try not to lose.
(Free’s eyes start glowing)
Silas: *Gasps*
Lui: I’m going first!!
Shu: Go for it.
Announcer: We got our first matchups in!! Uh oh, I hear a storm coming in hot because our match today is Free De La Hoya Vs Lui Shirosagi!!!
Free: Well, looks like I am going to have fun!
Lui: I’m winning this hear me!!
Free: Oh I hear you, loud and clear.
Ref: First battle, Ready set!!!
Lui/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
(Free hard launches)
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
(Fafnir picks up speed then sends Luinor flying into the wall, Luinor starts wobbling)
Announcer: Free starts off with a strong hit and Luinor is about to stop spinning!!!
Lui: *Gasps*
(Luinor stops spinning)
Ref: It’s Gyrate Fafnir with a survivor finish. Free De La Hoya claims 1 point!!!
Free: That was easy.
Lui: You got lucky that’s all!!!
Announcer: Gyrate Fafnir ends things quickly with a survivor finish!! I can’t wait to see what’s in store for the second battle!!!
Ref: Second battle, ready set!!!
Free/Lui: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!!
(Luinor dodges the attack)
Free: *Gasps*
Announcer: Luinor picks up serious speed after a wickedly strong launch from Lui!!!! And now Luinor is on the assault!!!!
(Luinor starts hitting Fafnir with a flurry of attacks)
Lui: Lunor!!!
(Lui enters Hyper Resonance, Luinor enters Hyper Flare)
Announcer: There is no way for Fafnir to counterstrike it is just taking each and every hit!!!
Lui: Assaulting Upper!!!!!
(Fafnir gets sent flying out of the stadium)
Ref: It’s Assault Luinor!!! With a ring-out finish!!! 1 point!!
Announcer: Wow Lui didn’t give an inch to Fafnir in that last battle!!!
Free: That's all?
Lui: Oh no!! We’ve got way more to crush you with!!!
Ref: Third battle!!! Ready set!!!
Free/Lui: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
Announcer: Surprisingly Fafnir doesn't go in for an attack!!! It’s chilling in the center!!!!
Lui: Show them an Assault!!! Luinor!!!
Announcer: Luinor is hitting Fafnir from all sides with a flurry!!!
Free: Wrench Parry!!!
Announcer: Wow!!! Fafnir redirects Luinior’s attack right into the wall!!!
(Luinor is sent flying in the air)
Lui: Luinor!!!!!
(Lui enters Hyper Resonance, Luinor enters Hyper Flare)
Lui: Assaulting Smash!!!!!!!!!!
Announcer: Luinor smashes down at Fafnir and they clash in a battle of wills!!!!
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
(Fafnir sends Luinor flying out of the stadium)
Ref: It’s Gyrate Fafnir with a ring-out finish!!! Free wins with a score of 2-1!!!
Announcer: Our High School Prodigy beat the Ogre!!!!!!
(Crowd goes wild)
(Lui roars)
Free: I wanna battle again sometime.
Lui: you won’t win!!!
Harry: Time for me to go up!!!
Shu: Harry try to have fun while battling.
Harry: I will have fun destroying whatever bey gets in my way!!!
Rantaro: Time for Honcho to shine!!!
Silas: Let’s hope there are no unicorns on stage.
Rantaro: Grr!!
Announcer: Our second match is Rantaro Kiyama Vs Harry Tanaka!!!
Rantaro: I’m going to blow you away!!!
Harry: I will finish this in approximately 10 seconds.
Rantaro: We will see about that!!!
Ref: Ready set!!!
Rantaro/Harry: Let it rip!!!
(Hermes takes the center)
Rantaro: Triple Wing Tornado!!!
(Roktavor starts making the barrier smaller)
Harry: Corrupted Counter!!!!!!!!
(Roktavor bursts)
Rantaro: *Gasps*
Ref: It’s Corrupt Hermes with a burst finish!!! Harry Tanaka wins with a score of 2-0!!!
Announcer: I cannot believe what I am seeing folks!!! Rantaro Kiyama was taken down in 9.5 seconds!!!
Harry: You call yourself a legend?
Rantaro: You got lucky!!!
Lui: So you finished that pretty quickly!!
Harry: No problem. Unlike you did with Free,
Lui: Grr!!!
Announcer: Alright, Tag Battles will be beginning soon!!!
Rantaro: Free I need to go out again!!
Silas: You lost.
Rantaro: I won’t anymore!!
Free: Fine, you and Silas go.
Rantaro: Thanks Free!!
Shu: Me and Lui are going up.
Harry: No!! I’m going!! Hermes demands to battle!!
Shu: No Harry.
(Harry pushes Shu out of the way and registers for the Tag Battle)
Shu: Grr!!
Announcer: Alright folks the Tag Battles will begin very shortly!!! So hold your horses because Silas and Rantaro are duking it out with Harry and Lui!!! Who will win!!!
All of you are free to rate
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 17, 2021
kk im gonna start reading it hope its good
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - USN - May. 17, 2021
(May. 17, 2021 6:51 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Chapter 24 is out!!! [Spoiler] Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 24
Guts Vs Strategy
Announcer: Valt Aoi and Asher Suzuki have the face of victory on their faces!!
All of you are free to rate
Here's my rating
Dialogue 4/5: It's good, but not great.
Plot 3/5: Not much happened besides the battles. It needs some spicing up.
Characters 5/5: They have a lot of character.
Description 2/5: The battles are descriptive but nothing else. How about describing the setting?
Battles 5/5: Excellent battles.
19/25
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 17, 2021
(May. 17, 2021 6:51 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Chapter 24 is out!!! Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 24
Guts Vs Strategy
Announcer: Valt Aoi and Asher Suzuki have the face of victory on their faces!!
(I run-up to the stadium, I trip)
Me: Woah!!!
Valt: Uh.
Silas: This should be easy!!
Valt: Don’t underestimate us!!
Announcer: Alright with the introduction out of the way let’s get started!!!
Ref: First battle, Ready set!!!
Valt/Rantaro/Silas/Me: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Valt: Rush Launch!!!
Me: Nexus Launch!!!
Announcer: Apollo and Valtrek start hitting Roktavor with a flurry of attacks!!!
Rantaro: Roktavor!!! Triple Wing Cyclone!!!!
Announcer: Roktavor creates a strong wind tornado and sends Apollo and Valtrek flying!!!
Silas: Now Satomb!!!
Announcer: Satomb is attacking them from all sides!! Their well-timed strategy might lead to their win!!!
Valt: Valtrek!!!
(Valt enters Hyper Resonance, Valtrek enters Hyper Flare)
Me: Apollo!!!
(I enter Hyper Resonance, Apollo enters Hyper Flare)
(Valtrek hits Apollo to get out of the barrage)
Announcer: Wow Apollo and Valtrek get out of a sticky situation!!!
Valt: Hero Flash Launch!!!
(Valtrek speeds up down the slope)
Silas: *Gasps*
Rantaro: Not yet!!!
(Roktavor hits Valtrek with the Cyclone, Valtrek and Roktavor burst)
Valt: *Gasps*
Announcer: Roktavor gets in the way of a wicked attack made for Satomb!!! But Satomb keeps attacking Apollo!!!
Me: No!!
Valt: Just remember just because they have strategy doesn't mean they will win. We got guts!!!
(I enter Deep Resonance)
Me: Nexus Force!!!
Announcer: Apollo picks up speed and catches onto the rim of the stadium!!!
Me: Nexus Flash!!!
(Apollo picks up serious speed, Satomb bursts)
Ref: It’s Phoebus Apollo with a burst finish. Team Valt wins with a score of 3-0.
Me: I did it!!!
Valt: You sure did!!
Hyuga: Man that was awesome!!
Rantaro: Man, you always find a way to surprise me!!
Silas: Well, since you beat us you can’t lose from here on out, got it!!
Me: I am going to win this thing!!!
Free: Asher Suzuki, how strong will you become?
Announcer: Alright, we now have our second round matchups!!!
Me: Wonder who we will face next!!
Announcer: The first battle will be!! Team Free Vs Team Shu!!
Harry: This is going to be fun!!
Valt: I can’t wait to watch this battle!!!
Announcer: Our second round will be!!! Team Aiger Vs Team Valt!!!
Dante: I can’t wait we’re facing Valt!!!
Aiger: Oh yeah!!!
Hikaru: We are winning!!!
Announcer: These matchups will be extra hot!!! I will see you tomorrow!!!
(I walk into Harry)
Me: Sorry man, didn,t see you there!!!
Harry: Move.
Me: Ok.
(Harry mumbles)
Harry: This kid beat Free!?
Me: I sure did!!!
Harry: You don’t stand a chance in this tournament!!
Me: *Gasps*
(Justin, Emma Jake, and Noah come over)
Justin: Harry stop it!!
Harry: You're inexperienced, weak, and lack strategy!!!
Me: Uno Reverse Card!!
Justin/Emma/Jake/Noah: ooooooooo
(Harry walks away)
Jake: Sick burn man!!
(I smile)
Me: Gotta go train with the team! Wanna come!?
Justin/Emma/Jake/Noah: No duh!!
(At raging bulls)
Harry: I have had to break everything in my path to become this strong!!! And he can become stronger by having fun!!!
(Harry flashes back)
Arthur: Go!! Final Blast!!!
(Harry’s bey breaks)
Harry: No.
Arthur: The weak have no place here!!
(Harry runs away to his hideout)
Harry: I will break Apocalypse!!!
Harry: The only way to blade!! Is to break beys!!!
(Harry finishes creating a new bey)
Harry: Basal Hermes!!!
(Harry goes back to Inferno)
Arthur: Didn’t I tell you not to come back?
Harry: I have got a new bey that will destroy Apocalypse!!
Arthur: Fine.
Arthur/Harry: 3 2 1 let it rip!!
Harry: Basal Blast!!!
(Apocalypse breaks)
Arthur: *Gasps*
Harry: I won!!!!
(Arthur picks up Apocalypse parts)
Hermes: Harry!! Let’s destroy every bey!!!
Harry: Yes. Yes, we will!!
(Harry returns to the present)
Hermes: Destroying Apollo again will be fun!!
Harry: I can’t wait to crush him!!!
Shu: *Gasps*
(Next Day)
(Me and Justin start racing to the Arena)
Justin: I’m not gonna lose!!
Me: Well I ain’t gonna lose ethier!!!
(Harry walks past us)
Justin: Abort!!!
(We crash into a bush)
Me: Ow.
Harry: What a joke.
(Inside the Arena)
Announcer: Alright folks today we have a special match for you all!!!
(Crowd goes wild)
Announcer: Team Free!!! Vs Team Shu this match will be loads of fun!!!
Free: I’m going first.
Rantaro: Go for it!!!
Silas: Try not to lose.
(Free’s eyes start glowing)
Silas: *Gasps*
Lui: I’m going first!!
Shu: Go for it.
Announcer: We got our first matchups in!! Uh oh, I hear a storm coming in hot because our match today is Free De La Hoya Vs Lui Shirosagi!!!
Free: Well, looks like I am going to have fun!
Lui: I’m winning this hear me!!
Free: Oh I hear you, loud and clear.
Ref: First battle, Ready set!!!
Lui/Free: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
(Free hard launches)
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
(Fafnir picks up speed then sends Luinor flying into the wall, Luinor starts wobbling)
Announcer: Free starts off with a strong hit and Luinor is about to stop spinning!!!
Lui: *Gasps*
(Luinor stops spinning)
Ref: It’s Gyrate Fafnir with a survivor finish. Free De La Hoya claims 1 point!!!
Free: That was easy.
Lui: You got lucky that’s all!!!
Announcer: Gyrate Fafnir ends things quickly with a survivor finish!! I can’t wait to see what’s in store for the second battle!!!
Ref: Second battle, ready set!!!
Free/Lui: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
Free: Gyrate Break!!!!
(Luinor dodges the attack)
Free: *Gasps*
Announcer: Luinor picks up serious speed after a wickedly strong launch from Lui!!!! And now Luinor is on the assault!!!!
(Luinor starts hitting Fafnir with a flurry of attacks)
Lui: Lunor!!!
(Lui enters Hyper Resonance, Luinor enters Hyper Flare)
Announcer: There is no way for Fafnir to counterstrike it is just taking each and every hit!!!
Lui: Assaulting Upper!!!!!
(Fafnir gets sent flying out of the stadium)
Ref: It’s Assault Luinor!!! With a ring-out finish!!! 1 point!!
Announcer: Wow Lui didn’t give an inch to Fafnir in that last battle!!!
Free: That's all?
Lui: Oh no!! We’ve got way more to crush you with!!!
Ref: Third battle!!! Ready set!!!
Free/Lui: 3 2 1 let it rip!!!
Announcer: Surprisingly Fafnir doesn't go in for an attack!!! It’s chilling in the center!!!!
Lui: Show them an Assault!!! Luinor!!!
Announcer: Luinor is hitting Fafnir from all sides with a flurry!!!
Free: Wrench Parry!!!
Announcer: Wow!!! Fafnir redirects Luinior’s attack right into the wall!!!
(Luinor is sent flying in the air)
Lui: Luinor!!!!!
(Lui enters Hyper Resonance, Luinor enters Hyper Flare)
Lui: Assaulting Smash!!!!!!!!!!
Announcer: Luinor smashes down at Fafnir and they clash in a battle of wills!!!!
Free: Fafnir!!!
(Free enters Hyper Resonance, Fafnir enters Hyper Flare)
Free: Gyrate Break!!!
(Fafnir sends Luinor flying out of the stadium)
Ref: It’s Gyrate Fafnir with a ring-out finish!!! Free wins with a score of 2-1!!!
Announcer: Our High School Prodigy beat the Ogre!!!!!!
(Crowd goes wild)
(Lui roars)
Free: I wanna battle again sometime.
Lui: you won’t win!!!
Harry: Time for me to go up!!!
Shu: Harry try to have fun while battling.
Harry: I will have fun destroying whatever bey gets in my way!!!
Rantaro: Time for Honcho to shine!!!
Silas: Let’s hope there are no unicorns on stage.
Rantaro: Grr!!
Announcer: Our second match is Rantaro Kiyama Vs Harry Tanaka!!!
Rantaro: I’m going to blow you away!!!
Harry: I will finish this in approximately 10 seconds.
Rantaro: We will see about that!!!
Ref: Ready set!!!
Rantaro/Harry: Let it rip!!!
(Hermes takes the center)
Rantaro: Triple Wing Tornado!!!
(Roktavor starts making the barrier smaller)
Harry: Corrupted Counter!!!!!!!!
(Roktavor bursts)
Rantaro: *Gasps*
Ref: It’s Corrupt Hermes with a burst finish!!! Harry Tanaka wins with a score of 2-0!!!
Announcer: I cannot believe what I am seeing folks!!! Rantaro Kiyama was taken down in 9.5 seconds!!!
Harry: You call yourself a legend?
Rantaro: You got lucky!!!
Lui: So you finished that pretty quickly!!
Harry: No problem. Unlike you did with Free,
Lui: Grr!!!
Announcer: Alright, Tag Battles will be beginning soon!!!
Rantaro: Free I need to go out again!!
Silas: You lost.
Rantaro: I won’t anymore!!
Free: Fine, you and Silas go.
Rantaro: Thanks Free!!
Shu: Me and Lui are going up.
Harry: No!! I’m going!! Hermes demands to battle!!
Shu: No Harry.
(Harry pushes Shu out of the way and registers for the Tag Battle)
Shu: Grr!!
Announcer: Alright folks the Tag Battles will begin very shortly!!! So hold your horses because Silas and Rantaro are duking it out with Harry and Lui!!! Who will win!!!
All of you are free to rate
lets be honest i love it
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 17, 2021
(May. 17, 2021 7:03 PM)USN Wrote: (May. 17, 2021 6:51 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: Chapter 24 is out!!! [Spoiler] Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle
Chapter 24
Guts Vs Strategy
Announcer: Valt Aoi and Asher Suzuki have the face of victory on their faces!!
All of you are free to rate
Here's my rating
Dialogue 4/5: It's good, but not great.
Plot 3/5: Not much happened besides the battles. It needs some spicing up.
Characters 5/5: They have a lot of character.
Description 2/5: The battles are descriptive but nothing else. How about describing the setting?
Battles 5/5: Excellent battles.
19/25 Ok if you were to edit this what would you change or add so I can get a better Idea of what to do next time
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - USN - May. 17, 2021
(May. 17, 2021 7:06 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: (May. 17, 2021 7:03 PM)USN Wrote: Here's my rating
Dialogue 4/5: It's good, but not great.
Plot 3/5: Not much happened besides the battles. It needs some spicing up.
Characters 5/5: They have a lot of character.
Description 2/5: The battles are descriptive but nothing else. How about describing the setting?
Battles 5/5: Excellent battles.
19/25 Ok if you were to edit this what would you change or add so I can get a better Idea of what to do next time
That is an excellent question.
For the Plot, make something like a character getting injured.
Description, What does the arena area look like?
otherwise, your almost perfect.
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 17, 2021
K I will try to incorporate that
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - USN - May. 17, 2021
(May. 17, 2021 7:24 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: K I will try to incorporate that
Thanks!
BTW I know I have had a lot of criticism, but I really enjoy your Fan-Fic! (:
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 17, 2021
so fart so good you should try somehting like justin and asher get founded by a team
LOL FAR* i did not mean fart
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - UnseenBurst - May. 17, 2021
(May. 17, 2021 7:33 PM)USN Wrote: (May. 17, 2021 7:24 PM)Strikegamerv6 Wrote: K I will try to incorporate that
Thanks!
BTW I know I have had a lot of criticism, but I really enjoy your Fan-Fic! (:
It is not critsimism it is the feedback that's what good friends do (Yes your my friend to Justice)
Chapter 25 Summary/Name Cheer Up Honcho!!! Silas and Rantaro are facing Lui and Harry in the second match Honcho is down in the dumps
RE: Beyblade Burst Bionic Battle - LegendJustice - May. 17, 2021
Thank you strike
And you can call me J when you not pinging me
|